r/DivorcedBirds • u/cthulhu-kitty • Jan 24 '18

The tweet that started it all

15.2k Upvotes

66 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 4h ago

It's been fifteen days since Kristen left; two since the divorce papers came. Cara's eyes snap open, body still shuddering from the raw emotions of an already half-forgotten dream. The roost is a mess. Kristen still isn't here. A peanut, her favorite; she takes a bite. It tastes like nothing.

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121 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/aksnowraven • 22h ago

Angry Bird Divorce After suffering Larry’s constant pokes and jibes for the past 20 years, insults didn’t even ruffle Martha’s feathers anymore.

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178 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Jerome_Wireman • 1d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle After her separation, Molly experimented with new hairstyles for her Plenty of Finch dating profile.

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1.1k Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 1d ago

Kevin insisted that this was his weekend with the kids. He tried to pivm them up before Kelly came back. Luckily, Kelly had hired a human babysitter to watch them and be on the lookout for Kevin. She will be taking him to court to get FULL custody.

v.redd.it

34 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/FashionBusking • 1d ago

🔊 Umberta came home from work only to be greeted by an indignant and defensive Phillipe who was trying to hide the fact his sidequail was actively hopping out the window.

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63 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 1d ago

Greg was spiraling after his divorce from Sharon. He drank too much, broke into a clinic, and got caught. He may be doing 5 to 10 in the state pen if he gets fingered for the break-in.

40 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/OldnBorin • 2d ago

Ernesto hates seeing the young lovebirds in his building. Reminds him of his failures

603 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 1d ago

Not Safe For Other Species As she dangled helplessly above the lake, Anne reflected on the choices that led here. Probably trying bondage and exhibitionism simultaneously was a bit much. And when Anne called her ex-husband's name mid-coitus, that would've upset anyone. But Lia could've at least untied her before storming off.

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63 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/I_might_be_weasel • 2d ago

Angry Bird Divorce Betty and Dan briefly pause their screaming at each other to watch the Wienermobile drive by.

222 Upvotes

7 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/I_might_be_weasel • 2d ago

The Bird Got What The Bird Deserved "You can't arrest me for breaking into my own house!" The separation order did, in fact, mean he could be arrested for breaking into his own house.

199 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/kojak343 • 2d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle With her new contacts and dazzling new outfit, Darlene was sure to WOW them at the mixer tonight.

56 Upvotes

Greater Blue-eared Starling

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/NoFlyingMonkeys • 2d ago

Bubba was on the run from the law, after again violating his restraining order and trashing the nest he lost in the settlement. Living in hiding for weeks took its toll and he also fell off the wagon. He is almost glad he got caught. It's still better than living with Brittany.

79 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/IllPossibility8022 • 2d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Roy grew out his mustache and bought a Harley to see if it would improve his luck with the ladies.

199 Upvotes

7 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Graeleaf • 3d ago

Not Safe For Other Species Carol used to hate it when Jim walked down to the water nude. Now that they’re divorced Jim has his morning coffee in the buff

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603 Upvotes

10 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 3d ago

The Bird Got What The Bird Deserved "Go on, you animals, take your pictures. I'm sure the woke press'll eat 'em up. I can see it now: 'How the mighty have fallen! Divorced and disgraced billionaire bathes in city park puddle.' They already took everything from me. None of you cared about my supposed crimes before you knew about them!"

gallery

73 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bitinglysarcastic • 3d ago

Angry Bird Divorce Gus always hated it when Julie dyed her feathers purple. Well the judge agreed with Julie, and Gus is moving back in with his Yia-Yia, because she got the nest, too!

138 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/cabeachgal • 3d ago

Now that her divorce from Bob is finalized, Mary is worried about entering the dating pool in her late fifties. She is desperately trying any method to reverse her aged look, including the latest trend to repeatedly water moisturize.

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62 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/JuneLee92 • 3d ago

Solomon (not pictured) feared for his life ever since he left Shikra. He couldn’t go anywhere without feeling her stern, judgmental gaze.

54 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/plonspfetew • 4d ago

Doug had taken up screaming into the void as a coping mechanism. The void had asked him twice to stop.

1.9k Upvotes

21 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bitinglysarcastic • 4d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Elena used her ex’s money for a spa day. Don’t the beak implants make her beak look pouty?

202 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/NoFlyingMonkeys • 4d ago

Don't blow it Emily, success in your anger management therapy is your last chance to save your marriage

79 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 4d ago

Her coworkers at the garage were unimpressed with Henrietta's impression of the InstaGrouse meme sensation Pukeko, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that the video got better engagement than her ex-husband Nathan's most recent post.

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45 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Planetyarnia • 4d ago

Not Safe For Other Species Tessa placed the blame of the collapse of her marriage firmly at the door of her mother in law.A small intimidating woman with an acid tongue that criticised poor Tessa at every opportunity-Tessa was glad to be free of her.

156 Upvotes

7 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Sepa-Kingdom • 4d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Eurasian collared dove in flight

41 Upvotes

After her divorce from Harvey, Rita decided fan dancing would be a great way to get back into shape.

3 comments

Subreddit

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists.

r/DivorcedBirds

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists. Please post pictures of birds who look like they are twice divorced (or more!) and an original caption about their backstory. Pictures/Videos must be of actual birds (feathered fowl), not human women, not art or paintings or photoshopped. No dead birds. Message mods for approval to post.

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