What do u guys think?

I’m going to have 3 under 3 in October. My oldest will be 2.5, middle child will be 11 and then obviously a newborn. I solo parent a lot due to my husband’s job and I also work part time(when part time when pregnant with middle child because eldest child is…a lot).

I have resigned to the fact that life is just going to be a shit show during the day but bedtime and everyone getting sleep (myself included) is high priority to me, especially because it really affects my mood and stamina.

So I’m just looking for guidance on how to get 3 little kids to bed by myself. Currently, I take both kids upstairs to bed at the same time and we cosleep. I give the middle child a bottle and then he likes to lay down and touch my face and go to sleep. While doing this, the eldest is sometimes able to occupy herself and other times she is very jealous or just needing a lot. Then once the middle child is asleep, I read and snuggle with the eldest and she eventually falls asleep. Lately it’s been about 1 hour and 15 minutes to get this accomplished.

I don’t want it to be like a 3 hour process just for the newborn to be up again. Also no one sleeps through the night yet. Eldest wakes up probably six times a night and middle child about 4.

Right now, I just don’t really see how it will be possible, especially with how awful it was with the addition of the middle child. The eldest would be up until 2am. So I’m not opposed to hired help but given how attached my eldest is to me, I could see it just becoming me doing individual bedtimes for everyone and it being an hours long ordeal.

So just looking for tips if anyone else typically does bedtime solo. Thank you!

Like the title says, I'm looking for solidarity more than anything else. I have a 5-month-old and an almost 3-year-old. The 5-month-old would only nap 30 mins at a time now and wakes up tired and grumpy. 3-year-old is creating mess almost all the time and does not nap and generally hates sleep. My husband while helpful works long hours and sometimes have to work at night so I sometimes have to put both kids to bed which is also stressful. Neither set of grandparents live nearby. I feel I can get nothing done aside from the daily maintaining of life.

We want more kids but a part of me just want to be done and over with (although seeing how cute my kids are and their cute interactions make me still want more). I know this is a season but I've been so frustrated lately. So yea, if you have similar stories, funny ones, positive vibes, send them my way cause I sure could use some! TIA!

Has anyone switched to prenatal vitamin powder because pills were just one more thing to remember? With everything that already has to get done in a busy household, I can see the appeal of just mixing a scoop into a drink instead of keeping up with multiple pills every day. Or does it make things more complicated than just swallowing pills? I've no problems with pills anyway, just considering it in case it's more convenient.

I have 3 kids. 8mo, 3yo, 5.5yo. Is 4 kids really that much more work than 3? I feel like I already have a big enough vehicle, house for 4 and I feel like everyone will have a buddy if we have 4. Someone give me the cold hard truth about 3 vs 4 kids. I worry about the financial aspect of 4 as they get older and being able to afford all their extra curricular, post secondary schooling, and if I will struggle to give them all the attention they need. Give me your thoughts!

I’m curious which number of kids felt the hardest for you day-to-day and why. I’d also love to know the age gaps between your kids and whether you think the age gaps made a difference! :)

I have a 28-month-old and a 10-month-old, and having two kids is much harder for me than having one! But I’ve always wanted 3 kids. I’m an only child, so I’m curious—when my kids are 6 and 4.5 years old, would that be a good time to have a third? I know it’s early to think about, but I’m just curious!

How many kids do you have and how many bedrooms?

We are starting plans for our home that my partner will be logging our prooerty for and building. I have 2 kids part-timr who will share a room together or may even sleep in our bedroom for a few years (they still sleep with me at this point). We are a living room family. Kids don't really spend time in their room. We obviously do not know how many kids we will have or their personalities but we would love to have 3 or 4 more. Just batting atound ideas of how many bedrooms we should have, obviously more bedrooms is more work and cost and will push our finish date out. Ideally we would like smaller bedrooms and larger common areas like a playroom. We can also build outbuildings for recreation and generally spend our days mostly outside except in the winter.

This is just a question for fun, but I've been wondering what others think!

How many kids do you consider a large, medium, and small family?

I'm sure it has to depend on where you live and what you're used to but I grew up in a family of 9 kids in the Western US and this is my scale:

Small: 1-3 kids

Medium: 4-5 kids

Large: 6-7 kids

Extra Large: 8+ kids

Growing up, I always thought anything less than 8 kids was small 😅. I even remember thinking that 6 kids was "fake large" because it looked like a lot but it wasn't actually that much. Hilarious lol. I did go to school with lots of families that had 6 kids and one that had 14 kids! That family was all super popular- several of them were student body presidents. It was a dynasty I suppose.

I have 6 kids, aged newborn to thirteen, and I can confidently say age ~10 is my least favorite age. I even prefer newborns and terrible twos over this age.

It's the odd sense that this child is suddenly mature enough to require being taken more seriously / requiring more in-depth interaction, but still having low self awareness and being super cringe all time, it's just not a natural-feeling combination and I hate it lol.

I felt like this when my my 13yo was 10 but now he's grown out of it and it feels way more normal to interact with him now. And my 2nd oldest now in that stage, and it feels just the same (bad) as when it was the 13yo.

If you have more than 4 kids how are you managing? Do you have a village? Do you have a supportive partner? Do you manage all by yourself? How?

I'm essentially a single Mum of 4 soon to be 5. I do it all by myself. It's hard but I manage. But I'm just curious if I'm alone in this? How are other big families getting by? What support do you have if any and how much support do they give you and how regularly?

My mental health gets bad sometimes because i NEVER get a break. It doesn't bother me except for when the sleepless nights with the kids come and then i wish I had someone, anyone i could call to take over just for an hour so I could rest. I do not know any big families EVERY one of my Mum friends has at most 3 kids but majority only 2 kids. The isolation can be difficult. But yeah am i alone in this? It can get overwhelming doing all the housework, childcare, appointments etc by my self and I just need to know how everyone else with 4+ kids does it please?

Thanks in advance.

EDIT: Thank you all for your responses, it is incredibly helpful. My kids are 11, 9, 23 months, 11 month and I'll have a newborn in Nov. I do all the night wakings, settling, cooking, dishes, laundry, appointments, finances - you name it. I have a partner but he does shift work and to be quite honest just doesn't want to help because I'm a SAHM he thinks I should do all things household and kids. He only comes home to eat and sleep. I never get a day away, the kids do everything with me. Even my gyno appointments. I don't mind it for the most part but the lack of sleep lately from my toddler coming to get me every night is affecting my mental health because I just get no rest. I'm on 2-3 hours sleep each night. With 2u2 and soon to be 3u3 I'm anxious about how I'll cope without being able to get sleep as it is. Anyway, I'm rambling.

Thank you all again for your responses! It is very much appreciated and for those that have advice, trust it will be taken on board 🙏😊

My son is 6 and desperately wants a loft bed. He wants one that has a desk underneath OR that we could fit our own desk under. What brands do you guys suggest for good quality loft beds? I’m so nervous to buy something that’s going to end up being junk or not safe.

Please reassure me it will get better and we’ll actually be able to enjoy our lives again.

SAHM Mom of 2.5 year old girl and 5.5 month old boy

My daughter is extremely sensitive and anxious and just generally unhappy. This makes me so sad to write because all I want is for my girl to be content, run around, explore… instead she’s scared of everything, or screaming her head off crying hysterically if another kid comes close to her at the park or at a friends house. I take her to public kid areas at least every other day and have truly tried to socialize her as much as I can. She starts preschool in a few weeks and it will be a huge adjustment for her that I hope will help build her confidence. All she wants to do is be held, never play or enjoy things like other kids. We can never enjoy family/friend time because she’s on the verge of a meltdown if something sets her off and either me or my husband need to take her for a walk to another area of the house or outside and calm her down. It’s been months of this. She’s always been shy as a baby/toddler but it has gotten even more extreme now.

As for my baby boy, again I see happy babies around me just hanging out in mom’s arms sitting, chewing on toys and smiling at people. I’m over here constantly having to stand and bounce him in my arms and walk around with him. He gets so squirmy and frustrated. He’s by no means an “easy” baby. I set him down to play on the mat, he lasts maybe 5 minutes and starts crying. If anything my daughter was so chill from 0-12 months, I’m happy to have had shared those nice memories with her.

Before this I’ve wanted 3-4 children, but now I don’t know. Will my husband and I feel happy again soon? Will my toddler enjoy life at some point? Please tell me it gets better :(

Is this all within the range of normal? I need advice from seasoned parents.

I'm looking to get something that works well for my toddler while toilet training (he's just over 2), while also being practical and as easy to use as possible for our family - as we only have the one bathroom that we share.

I'm looking at these two options, which would you say is the better option in your opinion?

Option 1 - Toddler toilet seat that sits on the toilet seat with a step stool

Option 2 - Flip up / down toilet seat with a step stool

32F, have 2 kids with an ex-partner. One vaginal followed by an emergency csection. Realistically, time wise and health wise (assume optimal health) how many more kids could I have without using IVF, if I started now? How many if I froze my eggs within the next 3 years? I get 18 month parental leaves (maternity can start before birth but I'd like the full or close to the full leave. Minimum 12 months home per child. I would then have to go back to work for 600 hours to get leave for the next child (15 weeks of work assuming going in everyday and not working overtime). Midwife has said 12 months between pregnancies for vaginal birth and 18 months between pregnancies for c-section, but I do not know how strict that is. Assume everything goes perfectly. No medical or mental health issues, babies sleep well, siblings adjust well, supportive partner/family and healthy marriage.

I just found out I’m pregnant with my fourth baby. My kids ages are 9, 2.5, and 10 months. Due date is May 2027, and I’m completely freaked out.

This wasn’t planned, and yes my husband and I made deliberate choices that led to the pregnancy. However I have been on a weight loss journey and have other underlying health issues that mean every pregnancy I have is high risk and involves obnoxious medications, as well as being on antidepressants.

More info, we are a military family and live thousands of miles from our families and I have very little support where we are. My husband works 80-100 hours a week and is often gone for weeks at a time.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for with this post, but I just know I’m overwhelmed, scared, and could use some words of encouragement. Ultimately I know it’ll be okay. I’m resilient and strong, but it’s still scary.

We recently had our 4th and last baby and my husband and I have always dreamed of going to Japan. We were planning on traveling abroad (maybe England/France/Netherlands) when our third turned 4 then we were surprised when we became pregnant with our 4th.

Sorry if I sound ignorant but a family of 6 traveling to Japan just sounds too big. Japan is already full of shops that are a tight fit and I can't even imagine finding a restaurant that could fit 6 of us at once. Also the crowds with 4 kids just sounds anxiety inducing. I haven't traveled abroad since having children so it sounds so daunting.

Have any of you guys with larger families traveled to Japan? Do you have tips? or should I just wait until they're all way older? I really miss traveling but it's so different when you have young children

Raising 4 boys 12 10, 9 7 and one little 6 year old girl. Chaos reigns! Any advice or questions

We’re going to have a few of our kids sharing a room soon, so I’m searching for a best bunk bed that makes sense for a larger family. Space is definitely a concern, but I also don’t want to sacrifice sturdiness or make bedtime a struggle with something awkward to climb in and out of. Parents who have been through this, what kind of bunk bed would you recommend? Appreciate any advice, thank you!

Hi!! So I’m a 32 yr old mom of an almost 2 yr old boy & my husband & I have been discussing trying for baby #2 which I’m finally excited about the idea after having the worst postpartum with my son & wondering if I’d ever want to have another. But all that to say I know you can’t really choose when you get pregnant but I’m trying not to have another late fall/winter birth/postpartum because of how bad it was the first time. My husband & I were talking about trying to aim for spring next year but that’s now passed & then we were like well maybe summer but we have SO much going on next year with building a new house & starting a new business & going to Disney beginning of the year (which being pregnant for sounds awful lol) & im too stressed to give birth in the middle of all that.

But I’m afraid to keep waiting & then when we start trying it doesn’t happen for us for a while & then I’m just getting older & older.

So basically I just want positive stories about giving birth after 33/34 yrs old & your children having a 3.5 yr age gap, because it’s looking like that’s what’s going to happen if we keep waiting. TIA🫶🏼

Cross posting because how do you know???

Anyone else have two really close age gaps in a row? 3 under 3?

I just found out I’m pregnant with my third, which was not planned, at only 8 months PP. I have such mixed emotions. Of course, part of me is excited, but mostly I’m overwhelmed by the idea of having another close age gap of 16–17 months.

My other two kids had the exact same age gap (16 months, almost 17), and my second was also not planned. I was originally wanting to go for a third when my youngest was at least a year or a bit older — ideally at least a 20-24 month age gap. I know it happened only a few months minimum sooner than I wanted but to me that few months would have helped a lot I feel mentally and physically

It’s a lot to process, and I’m not sure how I’m going to handle 3 under 3. My husband is excited, of course. I know it’ll be okay and that it’ll probably be rough for the first year or so, but I don’t feel as excited to share the news with others yet, including family. I know people often like to judge how close together you’ve had your babies, or ask/make comments about the age gaps/if it was planned or not. While I know it’s no one’s business, it’s hard not to let it affect you.

I’m also a little worried about how I’ll recover postpartum having another close age gap yet again. I did fairly well with my other two kids and actually bounced back even better after my second, and faster than I thought I would. I didn’t really gain any baby weight either. But I’m just worried my luck might run out. I might be completely fine, but I can’t help but worry lol.

It’s also just hard coming to terms with the fact that it was a total surprise and that I hadn’t wanted to get pregnant again this soon.

How did you cope with people’s judgement (if any!) and pregnancy/postpartum recovery after your third? And how did you manage juggling two close age gaps with 3 under 3?
I’d love to hear your experiences and hopefully feel a little more positive about it all! ❤️

Does the constant overstimulation of parenting little kids get better? What actually helped you?

This is vulnerable to admit, but I’d really love perspective from parents who have felt similarly.
My oldest just turned 3, my youngest is 21 months (15 months apart), and I’m almost 8 weeks pregnant with our third. Pregnancy is definitely making everything harder right now because I’m nauseous and exhausted 24/7, but if I’m being truthful, I’ve felt some version of this throughout motherhood.

I love my kids more than anything, and some moments with them are genuinely the happiest of my life. But so much of parenting little kids leaves me chronically overstimulated—the noise, touching, fussing, negotiating, competing needs, transitions, etc. I find myself counting down until bedtime or until someone else can take over, and then feeling guilty that I’m not enjoying this stage more.

Even something simple like the playground can feel like a lot: constantly watching two toddlers so nobody gets hurt, then managing two unhappy kids when it’s time to leave, someone screaming about a snack, etc. At bedtime they’re fighting over my lap or who gets to turn the page. The constant fussing probably gets to me the most. Sometimes I look at other parents and genuinely wonder: Are other people not this overstimulated? Are they doing something differently?
The endless maintenance of family life also wears me down—laundry, meals, cleaning, groceries, appointments, organizing and a million things that are never actually finished.

The confusing part is that I have help now. For the first 20 months I was mostly doing it myself as a SAHM while also in grad school, without family nearby and with a husband who works a demanding job and traveled frequently. Now I have childcare help and only work around 10 hours a week. I can take a break, but I’ll feel guilty, go back to the kids, and sometimes feel overwhelmed again within 10 minutes. So having more help hasn’t entirely fixed the underlying feeling.
I do have ADHD, which may contribute to how easily I get overstimulated.

I also grew up with parents who were easily overwhelmed, and it often came out as passive aggression and needing to control everything. I’m very conscious of not wanting my kids to experience me that way or feel like their normal needs and emotions are too much for me. I really want to break that cycle...especially before our 3rd arrives.

I don’t expect to enjoy every minute of parenting toddlers, but I also don’t want to white-knuckle my way through their childhood waiting for bedtime. I want more capacity for the hard parts and more space to actually enjoy the good ones.

So for anyone who has felt like this: What actually helped? Did you parent differently? Structure your days differently? Lower expectations? Work on your own regulation? Did anything make you genuinely enjoy parenting more? Or did it mostly get easier as your kids got older?

I’m really looking for practical advice from people who have been here and found something that helped. I know there are many families with much larger families than me experiencing less stress, so i'd love some wisdom!

I have 3 kids and pregnant with my 4th. 9, 3, 2. With soccer season and Halloween coming up I’m looking to get a stroller wagon. Anyone have any input? I’m looking at the larktale quad or the wonder fold. I was considering the Keenz cause they’re on sale right now but the Amazon reviews are swaying me towards no…