r/programmingcirclejerk 1d ago

Rust is a spiritual experience for me at this point.

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106 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 1d ago

Empty Comment To No One Lost in an Unending Sea of Brackets. BW 2017.

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16 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 1d ago

demoniC takes the dynamic-JIT lineage of HolyC, the vectorized math of Julia, the slicing ergonomics of Python, and the memory discipline of Rust. Arena memory, value-typed tensors, zero-copy views, and shapes checked at compile time.

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72 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 2d ago

I guess alcoholism is cooler than using AI to do things nowadays, is that your stance?

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65 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 1d ago

Need Help!!!!! Dell Latitude 3380 i5-7200U Touch — No POST / No Bootable Device. Any ideas?

0 Upvotes

A few years ago I bought a Dell Latitude 3380 (i5 7th gen, touchscreen). It worked normally for a few months, but then it started randomly shutting down and immediately turning back on. I suspected the charger, but tested it and it was fine.
Eventually, it shut down again and wouldn’t boot normally anymore. At that point it could still enter BIOS, the touchscreen worked, the fan spun, and it charged normally, but BIOS reported “No bootable device detected.”
I tried multiple known-working HDDs/SSDs, but none worked, so I eventually put the laptop away for about a year. A technician told me the motherboard needed to be replaced.
Now I took it out again, and the situation has gotten worse: it no longer even displays BIOS. The power button lights up and the laptop appears to power on, but the screen stays black. However, the Dell LCD self-test works (D + Power) and the screen cycles through colors normally.
The battery and RAM are installed, and the charger works. I haven’t been able to find a replacement motherboard in Lahore/Pakistan so far.
Does anyone have any ideas what could cause this, or know where I could find a cheap replacement motherboard for a Latitude 3380 in Pakistan? I’d really like to try fixing it rather than throwing it away.


r/programmingcirclejerk 3d ago

I thought the title said “The Death of JavaScript” and got excited. Still cool though.

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128 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 3d ago

In a year they [AI] can translate most codebases (with human help) into Rust, and after that it's smooth sailing.

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85 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 2d ago

How fix/resolve critical thinking after relying on the ai prompt to understand an exercise in counting loops.

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0 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 3d ago

For example, if you look at the cost model, you’ll see that it explicitly references ClickBench all over the place.

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30 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 4d ago

I’ve started to see a concerning trend with zig of late. If you look at today’s commit logs you will spot it. Adding support for spork8 it’s a hobby 8-bit computer project that Andrew Kelly hung out with over the weekend for like a hackathon. The spork8 project has like 54 stars

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99 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 5d ago

I was a Linux kernel developer in the 1990’s. I watched the Crays, HP-X's and Intel Paragons carted out to the trash heap, replaced by Linux on commodity hardware. I haven't touched a Windows or Apple computer since 1994.

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115 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 5d ago

I've had no problems with AMD GPUs on my system. Then again, I haven't used a janky Scatware OS, so... people have more issues with the "sekrit scatware code" that nullVideo puts out

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36 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 5d ago

fix cli (100 upvotes in a week = release)

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1 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 6d ago

[Security] Stop USB device names from being executed as Hyprland Lua

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171 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 7d ago

How do I fix this bug?

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39 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 8d ago

I see the future by living in it. I am spending the equivalent of $122k/month of API token spend, or about $4,000 per day, using 21 Claude Max accounts

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296 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 8d ago

There’s literally no difference between writing about being a staff engineer versus someone writing about being a janitor. Honestly I’d rather read about the janitor, they actually make a measureable difference.

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147 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 8d ago

It's not you, it's monad transformers

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30 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 9d ago

so basically if you all want to drop this project and move on to mine that has a better architecture from the ground up, that would be cool

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264 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 7d ago

paste this to break the browser (ERROR 400) in the search bar

0 Upvotes

The ἀνακύκλησιςschadenfreude limₓ→∞ [f(x) + gyatt] pumpernickel солипсизмhiraeth ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ∫₀¹ eˣ dx öngor 🕉 miserere tsundere perestroika ubuntu ∇ × Bzeitgeist farnienteKummerspeck 𐎠𐎼𐎾𐎠𐎾 dépaysement ☯ ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°) 지평선 tarab ∂²u/∂t²sillage Fernweh flâneur الغريب 🕎 lagom saudade hygge 🪯 ∮ E·dA toska свобоδα 𓋹 バックシャン uitwaaien sobremesa 𐌰𐍄𐍄𐌰 عيาร 𑗃𑗔𑗚 𓀭 wabi-sabi 𐌲𐌰𐌿𐌾𐌰 jeitinho 𐡌𐡋𐡊 pochemuchka 𑚆𑚌𑚳 mamihlapinatapai {[ Pojkan ifrån byin, ha stigi åpp ti skyin, har pängan i madrass—Economy plus. ]} 𐦆𐦎 緣分 𓁹𓆣 tsundoku 𐨀𐨁𐨭𐨿𐨬𐨠 uitwaaien 𐕗𐕘 orange voldemort 𐡒𐡓𐡕 schlimazel 🧬 𓃰𓃠 waldeinsamkeit 𐌳𐌰𐌿𐌽𐍃 goya 𐎲𐎠𐎢𐎿 yoko meshi {[ Ты меня не ищи, я страдать и плакать не буду. Просто всё, уходи. Скоро я тебя позабуду. ]} 𓀬𓃭 jayus 𐨐𐨪𐨿𐨨 Kummerspeck 🍩 𐕜𐕝 iktsuarpok 𐡔𐡌𐡔 バックシャン 𓅓𓆓𓏏 tıraş 𐌷𐌻𐌿𐍄𐍂𐍃 volte-face 𐎭𐎠𐎼𐎹 culaccino 𓀎𓃾 abbiocco 𐨕𐨁𐨟𐨿𐨟 desbundar (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ 𐕞𐕟 utepils 𐡘𐡓𐡔 feierabend {[ Wenn ich nüchtern wär, wär ich Millionär, hätt 'ne Segeljacht und ein Haus am Meer. ]} 𓃡𓆏 hygge 👁️‍🗨️ 𐌹𐌿𐌳𐌰𐌹𐌿𐍃 gula 𐎾𐎠𐎲𐎠𐎾 giri 𓁐𓆙 naz 𐨀𐨟𐨿𐨨 cafuné 𐕠𐕡 gezellig 𐡕𐡌𐡅 toska 𓅱𓃻 l’appel du vide 📡 𐌺𐌰𐌿𐍂𐌽𐍉 madrugada {[ Cupid walks right through and shoots an arrow through my heart, and I sound like a loon... loved you from the start. ]} 𐎫𐎎 saudade 𓆨𓆛 wabi-sabi 𐨤𐨿𐨪𐨐𐨃𐨟𐨁 Schadenfreude 𐕢𐕣 fernweh 𐡗 dépaysement 🔮 𓃟𓆗 sillage 𐌻𐌹𐌿𐌱𐌰 tartle ༼ つ ◕◕ ༽つ 𐎥𐎠𐎢σ gigil {[ Πάνω-Κάτω, ερωτοχτυπημένος, δώσε πόνο! ]} 𓁽𓃗 nunchi 𐨢𐨪𐨿𐨨 jayus ubuntu 𐡎𐡏𐡐 zeitgeist 𓃕𓆦 farniente 𐌿𐍂𐍂𐌿𐌽𐌿𐌽𐍃 pochemuchka 𐎠𐎼𐎭 voorpret 𓄿𓅓𓎡 attwirl {[ La mano arriba, cintura sola, da media vuelta, danza kuduro. ]} 𐨯𐨎𐨯𐨿𐨐 kilig tartle 𐡗𐡘 Jayus 𓃠𓆦 culaccino 🎭 𐌱𐌰𐌿𐍂𐌲𐍃 sobremesa 𐎧𐎱𐎧 razbliuto 𓀢𓆏 hygge 𐨀𐨣𐨣𐨿𐨟 ikigai goya 𐡚𐡛 lagom 🛸 𓅓𓆙 tsundoku {[ Down in Ohio, swag like Ohio, Based God, your bitch call me daddy. ]} 𐌲𐌰𐌿𐌼𐌰 saudade 𐎿𐎱𐎠 Sehnsucht 𓃰𓆛 toska ¯_(ツ)𐨀𐨁𐨣𐨿𐨡𐨿𐨪𐨁𐨪 weltschmerz farniente 𐡜𐡝 zeitgeist 𓃡𓆗 komorebi 𐎠𐎬𐎢 culaccino 𓃔𓆡 volte-face {[ CYKA BLYAT! Раз, раз, раз, хардбасс, все в спортивках адидас! ]} 𐌲𐌰𐍃𐍄𐍃 abbiocco 𐨤𐨂𐨪𐨂𐨟 desbundar utepils 𐡞𐡟 feierabend 𓅔𓆚 hygge 𐎥𐎦𐎧 gula {[ Let's go out of space, out of mind, no care about the time, just you and I, hakuna matata! ]} 01000101 01011000 01010100 01010010 01000101 01010100 01000101 giri 𐌼𐌴𐌽打 naz 𐨪𐨌𐨗𐨌 cafuné 𐕯 gezellig 𓃕𓆨 toska (′ʘʘ′) 𐎿𐎹𐎠 l’appel du vide {[ הבה נγילה ונשмχα, הבה נרננה ונשμχα! ]} 𐡠𐡡𐡢 madrugada 𓁺𓃠 saudade 𐌰𐌷𐌿𐌳𐌰 wabi-sabi 𐨟𐨿𐨪𐨁 Schadenfreude 𐕰𐕱 fernweh 𓃦𓆏 dépaysement 𐎪𐎫𐎬 sillage {[ Расцветали яблони и груши, поплыли туманы над рекой! ]} 𐡣𐡤𐡥 let him cook 𓀚𓃭 gigil 𐌱𐌻𐌹𐌽𐌳 nunchi 𐨡𐨢𐨁 jayus 𐕲𐕳 ubuntu 𓅕𓆗 zeitgeist 𐎮𐎯𐎰 farniente 𐡦𐡧𐡨 pochemuchka 𓁼𓆣 voorpret 𓀚𓃭𐎮𐎯𐎰01011011 wack 𓅓𓆓𓏏 caillera 𐌷𐌻𐌿𐍄𐍂𐍃 racailles ∮_C (P dx + Q dy) flus 𐎭𐎠𐎼𐎹 lacra 𓀎𓃾 pibe (ง'̀-'́)ง ∇²ψ + k²ψ = 0 mushkil 𐨕𐨁𐨟𐨿𐨟 yaani 𐕞𐕟 habibi lim┬(h→0)〖(f(x+h)-f(x))/h〗 chav 𐡘𐡓𐡔 bogan 𓃡𓆏 wanka ∫_C F · dr malaka 𐌹𐌿𐌳𐌰𐌹𐌿𐍃 palika 𐎾𐎠𐎲𐎠𐎾 wesh ∂u/∂t = α∇²u yalla 𓁐𓆙 șmecher 𐨀𐨟𐨿𐨨𐨆 naspa ∭_V (∇·F) dV bratan 𐕠𐕡 gopnik 𐡕𐡌𐡅 lohi 𓅱𓃻 jebać 𐌺𐌰𐌿𐍂𐌽𐍉 alter ∑(n=0)^∞ (xⁿ/n!) digga 𐎫𐎎 morro 𓆨𓆛 chale 𐨤𐨿𐨪𐨐𐨃𐨟𐨁 che 𐕢𐕣 quilombo 𐡗 boludo ∫_a^b f(x)dx flaite 𓃟𓆗 weón 𐌻𐌹𐌿𐌱𐌰 chulo 𐎥𐎠𐎢σ guiri ∇f(x,y) currao {[ Panteri, panteri, vi ste hrabri borci, najhrabriji momci, branite nam rodni kraj! ]} C₈H₁₀N₄O₂ 🧪 gamberro 𓃠𓆗 sweeper CH₃COOH ⚗️ bife 𐨐𐨪𐨿 scusi ( ͡° ʖ̯ ͡°) C₆H₁₂O₆ 🧬 pote 𐕜𐕝 guay NaCl 🧂 asere 𐡔𐡌𐡔 chamo C₂H₅OH 🥂 parce 𓅓𓆓𓏏 pibe CO₂ 💨 wey 𐌷𐌻𐌿𐍄𐍂 pana H₂SO₄ ⚗️ curro 𐎭𐎠𐎼𐎹 pijo C₆H₅CH₃ 🛢️ mola 𓀎𓃾 tranki 𐨕𐨁𐨟𐨿𐨟 killo Heisenberg Hlψ⟩ = E⩲ψ⟩ Schrödinger ds² = -(1-2M/r)dt² Einstein π₁(X) Hausdorff (✿ ³ o ³) H_n(X;G) Poincaré 𓁹𓃰 homotopy C_L mach T_W = D + qS chord 𐦄𐦑 cavitation V_NE stall 𓀀𓅓 pitch-up Börsenumsatz rendite Chiffre d’affaires bénéfice (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ Amortissement liqüidez 資本剰余금 fusión 𐌰𐍄𐍄𐌰 Leverage Avanat-projet flaps 𐨨𐨲 vortex 𐡒𐡓𐡕 nacelle ++ c0=2 > +++++ c1=5 [ < + Add 1 > - Sub 1 ] ++++ ++++ c1=8 [ < +++ +++ > - ] < . 𓁹 UAL1 📡 AAL2 🛫 DLH430 🛩️ SIA22 ⛈️ AFR066 🛸 QTR701 🌪️ BAW227 🌋 UAE201 🚀 ANZ1 🛰️ JAL6 🎚️ {[ Ma chérie, tu es belle comme le soleil. Ma chérie, je t'aime plus que tout au monde. ]} Conventional imperative programming languages typically allow data to be stored in variables, but esoteric languages may utilize different methods of storing and accessing data Under the hood, Asciidots is a Python program. An Asciidots program is just fed into that underlying program and digested into normal Python code, which is then executed Each time the loop is executed, the current cell is decremented, the data pointer moves to the right, that next cell is incremented, and the data pointer moves left again 43 52 49 54 49 43 41 4c 5f 4f 56 45 52 4c 4f 41 44 5f 44 45 54 45 43 54 45 44 0d 0a 7b 22 73 74 61 74 75 73 22 3a 20 22 63 68 61 6f 74 69 63 22 2c 20 22 6d 65 6d 6f 72 79 5f 64 75 6d 70 22 3a 20 22 30 78 46 46 3A 30 7 78 30 30 3A 30 78 41 35 22 7d 53 59 53 54 45 4d 5f 53 54 41 42 49 4c 49 54 59 5f 5a 45 52 4f 5f 52 45 41 43 48 45 44 ⚛️ ⟨ψ|Ĥ|ψ⟩ = ∑ᵢ cᵢ*cⱼ⟨𝜙ᵢ|Ĥ|𝜙ⱼ⟩ aww man, my chicken is a 20pc mcnugget now 🪐 |𝜓⟩ = α|0⟩ + β|1⟩ Emirates ✈️ ⟨0|Û†Û|0⟩ = 1 Cathay Pacific 🛩️ A350-1000 ⚙️ ⟨𝜙|𝜓⟩ ≠ 0 Boeing 777X 🌀 Tr(𝜌Ô) bladed disk assembly 🪐 Ĥ|𝜓(t)⟩ = iħ ∂/∂t |𝜓(t)⟩ low-pressure turbine rotor 🚀 ⟨𝜓|Â|𝜓⟩ variable stator vanes 🛰️ Singapore Airlines 🛫 𐨨𐨲 high-pressure compressor spool 📡 Lufthansa ⛈️ ** Bombardier CRJ-900** 🎚️ ⟨+|_|−⟩ shroud segment array [ k_xx k_xy k_xz ][ ∂²T/∂x² ] [ ρ·c_p · ∂T/∂t - q_dot ] [ k_yx k_yy k_yz ][ ∂²T/∂y² ] = [ -∇ · q ] [ k_zx k_zy k_zz ][ ∂²T/∂z² ] [ h(T_surface - T_∞) ] 🐄 Omasum reticulum rumen 🥩 abomasum 𓃰𓃠 ligamentum nuchae 🦴 Sphenoid os coxae xiphoid process 🫁 foramen magnum cribriform plate 🩸 sternocleidomastoid incus 🦷 acetabulum gastrocnemius 🧠 sustentaculum tali [ d²/dt²(r) - r(dθ/dt)² ] u_r + [ r(d²θ/dt²) + 2(dr/dt)(dθ/dt) ] u_θ = -μ/r² u_r Δv = I_sp · g_0 · ln(m_initial / m_final) n = √(μ/a³) M = E - e·sin(E) 👄 Rødgrød med fløде Schilddrüse Augenapfel 🧠 Knorpel Kadaver 🦴 Glandula submandibularis Kehlkopf 👁️ Arteria carotis interna Zwerchfeel 🫁 Musculus latissimus dorsi Śledziona 🩸 Trzustka Kręgosłup 🦷 Kość miedniczna Rzepka 🦵 Obojczyk Kostka 🦶 router bgp 65001 neighbor 10.254.11.2 remote-as 65002 route-map ENTROPY_IN out ip prefix-list CHAOS_BLOCK seq 5 permit 192.0.2.0/24 ge 25 le 32 [ dS ] [ (1/T)dU + (P/T)dV - ∑(μ_i/T)dN_i ] [ S_gen ≥ 0 ] [ ds ] = [ (dq_rev / T) ] = [ ΔS_univ > 0 ] [ σ ] [ ∇ · (q/T) + q_dot/T ] [ S = k_B · ln(Ω) ] {[ Vi sitter här i Ventrilo och spelar lite DotA, och pushar på och smeker med motståndet vi leker. ]} import sys; import numpy as np; def compute_multiversal_chaos_matrix(entropy_tensor, gyatt_limit): try: shadder = np.linalg.det(entropy_tensor); skibidi_coefficient = np.exp(gyatt_limit); return shadder * skibidi_coefficient * np.eye(entropy_tensor.shape) except Exception as e: sys.stderr.write(f"SYSTEM_OVERLOAD_EXCEPTION: {e}\n"); return np.zeros_like(entropy_tensor)


r/programmingcirclejerk 9d ago

Rawdogging SQL when you're not a seasoned DB administrator basically makes an arcane art look occult.

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42 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 10d ago

If everyone would use epoch time in conversations [...] we'd get used to it

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117 Upvotes

r/programmingcirclejerk 10d ago

LLMs have essentially made any language above the C++/Rust systems level tier obsolete.

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177 Upvotes

r/shittyprogramming 9d ago

I built a coding game where you don’t actually write code

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consoly.app
0 Upvotes

Hey guys, I’ve been building Consoly.

You get a code snippet and your job is simply to predict the output. 3 attempts, no coding.

It has:

• Daily challenges
• Dojo with unlimited practice and belt progression
• Multiplayer battles with friends
• Global rankings: daily, weekly and all time

I’ve been making videos of people playing it and this one was one of my favorites.

https://www.instagram.com/diegoveloper/reel/DZxg-yAR3qU/

I’m the developer behind it, so this is self promotion, just being transparent about it.

Would you guys play this? Feedback is welcome! :D


r/programmingcirclejerk 10d ago

Very little quality, let alone high-quality, code is written in VSCode.

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110 Upvotes