Sweet dreams

If I could make you love me
Man I would
But I can’t
I can tell you how much I care
How wonderful you are
My intentions

I can write you poems
Love letters

I can be faithful
Loyal
Honest
Loving
Solid

I can give my all

I can do anything when it comes to me

But when it comes to you?
You see I have no control over you.
I know.

I could explain me a million times
Can’t make you understand or love me.

That’s how life works.

Can I not value something?
Someone?
Am I not allowed to see beyond the exterior?

That’s cool…

What about under the shell.
Beyond the matter of me.
Beyond my chemical and biological make up.
Beyond my appearance.

What do you see?

I’m just wondering

“You look like you’re happy”
“You look like you’re doing good”
Look
Look
Look
Look

Would you look at this?
Would you just look at it?

Looks can be deceiving

“You could have any man you want”
Must not be a real lover… must not be loyal.
Must not be appreciative.
Sure.

“You’re being dramatic”
Must not feel that deeply.
Must not love that hard.
Sure.

“I’m glad you’re doing good”
Must not be struggling.
Must not be lonely.
Sure.

“You should be proud of yourself”
For what?
Surviving?
Sure.

“It makes you stronger”
Surviving makes you stronger?
Sure.

The paradox of how one is perceived

Name
Age
Career
Looks
All exteriors

People get hung up on the exteriors
How you look
How your voice sounds
But they don’t see the underneath

Even if you try to show them
Life is hard
Extremely
Because we are judged upon how things look outwardly

But you hurt me man
I don’t know why you did
I don’t get it
But man I was serious

I don’t know
That’s what sucks
Is you can have a good heart
Have real intentions

I am not my body
I am not how I look
I am not my humor
I am not my hair
I am not my career

I am my heart
I am my soul
I am my mind

That’s who I am but no one sees ME

They see the exterior

That’s the problem.
I mean it’s a lose lose no matter what man.

It doesn’t matter what I do or how I handle the situation
I am in a losing situation regardless of how I move.

Over you
I don’t want to be wanting someone who doesn’t want me
I don’t want drama
I don’t want heart break
I don’t want to feel like this

I mean it’s like what do I do?
Cry about it
Ask you not to go
Tell you how much you mean to me
And then you look at me like

Idk I mean it’s like all people do is minimize my feelings or make fun of them

Yeah I mean so what?
I sit there and try to survive the only way I know how
I try to cheer myself up and cut up
That’s all I can do

It’s like on this situation it doesn’t matter what I do man

I’m not a player and I never can be
My heart loves too hard
My conscience gets the best of me
And I can’t be like that
I can’t man
I can’t pretend I don’t care
I can’t sit there and pretend I feel a way I don’t
So I will just be alone

About anything
I just know I keep making dumb decisions

You ever do something that cracks you up but no one else knows that you’re doing it to entertain yourself and you laugh thinking about people’s reaction🤣