r/CharacterDevelopment • u/Sippeon • 3d ago
Writing: Character Help Writing Bisexual Characters
How do you write bisexual characters without falling into the usual stereotypes?
I've been thinking about bisexual representation in fiction, and it seems easy to accidentally make it binary: either the character is treated as “basically straight” because they're dating the opposite sex, or “basically gay” because they're dating the same sex.
I'd rather just let them be bisexual.
For example, they might have had meaningful relationships with different genders before their current partner. They might occasionally flirt or make a casual “you're hot” comment without being promiscuous. They can be completely monogamous; bisexuality doesn't imply polyamory, and polyamory is its own thing.
A bisexual character could also have an awakening arc, especially during adolescence: maybe they initially assume they're straight, develop an unexpected crush on someone of the same gender, spend some time questioning it, and eventually realize, “Oh. I'm bi.” But that doesn't necessarily need to be traumatic or dramatic. Sometimes they can simply realize it and move on.
I also think there are interesting experiences around perceived identity. A bi person dating a woman may be assumed straight; dating a man may get them assumed gay. Their sexuality hasn't changed—the assumptions around them have.
And honestly, sometimes the best representation might be extremely mundane:
«“My boyfriend is gorgeous.”
“Your ex-girlfriend was gorgeous too.”
“I have excellent taste.”»
No huge coming-out speech. No promiscuity stereotype. No “secretly gay” twist. Just a bisexual character whose sexuality is one part of who they are.
How do you approach writing bisexual characters? Do you prefer explicit awakening arcs, or characters who are simply established as bi and allowed to exist normally?
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u/FlyinLeviathon Writing a Novel 3d ago
All of my characters are canonically bi - i write fantasy, so being bi is the established "norm" in my worlds.
I always try to be incredibly casual about it. If they have a straight or a gay romance/romantic partner it's the same - though usually they've at least had romantic pasts with both at some point. Other than that, I don't put much emphasis on it.
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u/moworgana 2d ago
I personally think it's super dependent on the character. Both my boyfriend and I are bi, and I have had a lot of bi friends in the past, and suffice to say, everyone's super different. I've known I was queer since before I knew what that was, but my boyfriend learned when we were in his tweens (mainly because I opened up that door for him).
Just like in real life, I think it'd vary. I like making my characters all different in their sexualities. One of my main characters has his sexuality as a pretty major point in his story, while my other main character ends up dating both men and women in the story but it's shown as a casual thing. But I've also been writing characters of varying sexualities for a looong while + I usually make the character first and then figure their sexuality so that their sexuality isn't a huge part of their character (or else you end up with one of those characters whose identity is just their sexuality which isn't advisable)
TLDR; I think it's character specific because everyone experiences sexuality differently. Some bisexuals have huge coming out speeches, some bisexuals are promiscuous, but everyone's different. I don't write my bi characters any different than I write my gay or straight characters because it's their sexuality, not a character trait.
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u/YarnSnob1988 3d ago
One of my two POV characters is bi and this is exactly how I try to do it. Sometimes he flirts with women, sometimes with men. He mentions dating or hooking up with people of both sexes. He has long-term committed relationships with women and men across the narrative's timeline. It's not treated as a big deal by any of the other characters, it's just one facet of who he is.