He has been texting me for a few days even though I had unfollowed him already. He texts me from different accounts. And then comes this text from him.... I don't even know what to say at this point

I've often seen people react negatively when you say you want to be child free, as they assume you hate kids.

I love kids. I enjoy reading them stories and playing with them. I enjoy teaching them to paint and read and learn new words or pushing them on the swing for ages. I enjoy shopping for new clothes and toys.

I also enjoy giving them back to the parents after 3 hours when I've had my fill.

Like it's possible to be child free, and love the fun part of kids and recognize that you don't want the responsibility and the best way to fulfill that is to be the best auntie to all your friend's kids. They need a night out every now and then. Or simply a day when they can clean the house or rest 2 hours and someone else is monitoring the kid. And in turn I get my baby fill and then go back home to a peaceful house, and do my thing and sleep a restful night's sleep.

3 years of doing this makes me more and more convinced I don't want my own kids. but that my love for other people's kids will just continue to grow especially when I get to experience them in small fun doses.

Source - The Economist - https://www.instagram.com/reel/DcsgNZZjSA3/

29M,Single.. Till last year I was not much into this Childfree idea, but recent days I had changed my mind into being childfree.

This unemployed phase had taught me many things, For a one vacancy there is a huge crowd waiting to compete with u. I don't want kid to enter in this rat race.

I'm hearing lot & lot of crimes against children nowadays. This is bothering me. My frnd is working as a yoga instructor in a ICSE school, he once told me that nowadays many children are getting suicidal thoughts & he used to give some counselling or yoga practice to them.. I was shocked to hear this.

And this economy & AI era, The uncertainty level has been increased to the peak.

People with children & childfree both r going to suffer.. Being childfree couple won't be like a easy walk.. But at least as a childfree adult, you only have to handle your own struggles, without worrying about a child's future..

That's it.. Why I'm being childfree

I am not actively looking for a life partner right now because I am currently not doing well physically or mentally. I know I have things to work on and I want to become a better version of myself.

But I sometimes wonder, do we really have to become that better version first to deserve love?

I have been through a lot since childhood and carry some scars and flaws because of it. I am still healing. I don’t expect a partner to fix me, but I do feel that the right kind of support and companionship can sometimes help us grow.

Most matchmaking posts talk about the best parts of ourselves. I would rather be honest about the not so perfect parts too.

Maybe I am wrong, but can two imperfect people meet, support each other and grow together?

Would love to know what people here think.

Genuine question. I replied to a meme today and was told I'm living in a dream world. Another person asked why I'm here if I think the world is a better place, as if being CF requires believing humanity is doomed.

I'll let you decide whether I'm living in a dream world.

Things have never been better than in 2026. Human achievements in the last 200 years have drastically improved quality of life.

Maternal and infant mortality, Homicides per capita, Vaccination, Disease eradication, Medical research, Life expectancy, Modern Plumbing, Space exploration, Satellite technology, Communication, Internet access, Mobile connectivity, Artificial intelligence, Computing, Digitalization, Free online education, Renewable energy, Nuclear energy, Battery technology, Carbon emissions per capita, Ozone layer recovery, Water management, Desalination, Agricultural productivity, Food security, Natural disaster prediction, Emergency response, Infrastructure, Transportation, Crime prevention, Forensics, Cybersecurity, Extreme poverty, Population growth, Women's rights, Women's education, Democracy, Scientific literacy, Critical thinking, Access to information, Religious extremism, Social accountability, War casualties per capita, Epidemic preparedness, Gene editing.

And I expect most of these trends to continue.

And this isn't me saying everything is perfect. It obviously isn't. But humanity has repeatedly demonstrated that problems can be solved.

The world of 2026 has problems, but compared with the world our ancestors lived in, we have extraordinary healthcare, technology, safety, knowledge, communication, education and material abundance.

They won’t go through the countless famines humanity has experienced. Just look at the pictures from the Bengal Famine. Are we going through anything like that today?

They won’t go through another plague or Spanish Flu that kills a huge portion of the population.

They won’t experience World War I or II, where millions died, or wiped out by a nuclear attack.

They probably won’t suffer from smallpox or polio. One of my relatives lost their eyesight to smallpox because vaccines weren’t available in India back then.

My maternal grandfather died alone at home, and we still don’t know why. Maybe if he had access to a mobile phone, he could have reached out for help.

They probably won’t be killed in a village simply because they couldn’t give birth to a male child, while the family, village and community hide the incident to protect their “izzat.”

They probably won’t be killed by Jack the Ripper, a serial killer who was never caught.

and so on….

So I don't understand the assumption that being childfree requires believing the future will be terrible.

I'm CF because I don't want children. I don't need to believe humanity is doomed to justify that decision.

In fact, I think there's a reasonable chance that someone born today will live in a world substantially better than the one we live in now.

As a childless person who is not even in a relationship right now. I feel society judges you the harsh way in India. Man or woman does not matter they judge you like something is wrong with you if you aren't married or have kids. I guess it's a little worse for women than men.

But men will also face taunts. He is a womanizer, awara hai or probably Gay. Not that I have a problem with homosexuals but Gay is used as a slur in India to put down visibly straight men.

They also ask you, don't you love kids. Yeah I love kids that's why I don't want them to suffer.

Also this child loving society will try IVF in case of infertility but will never adopt a kid that belongs to someone else. So much for their love of kids.

My reasons for not having kids is mostly because I don't want to bring kids in this screwed up Indian society.

Also probably I have unresolved childhood trauma. I was not particularly close to my father and felt kind of unwanted as a child. Though my mom did love me and still does. Sometimes I feel guilty of disappointing her by not giving her grandchildren which she wants. Told her to ask my brother instead. 😂

I don't want to repeat my dad's pattern if I have kids.

Childfree and proud.

I like this community, so I am sharing something which is my observation.

Having and rearing children is a default for most societies across globe and fertility rates were very high up until the recent history, once again for most of the societies but since many nations have gone through wars and consequential industrializations, their birth rates dropped even though culturally those countries have changed a lot in terms how idea of family works.

In case of India, the expectation which is naturalized for having children is that they would be and should be providing income upon reaching youth. I beleive this is very specific to current indian society. I see so many people who need to earn as soon as possible, as they were raised to be the income providers for their family. Indian families specifically raise children to be future income providers which I beleive is something not as prevalent in many societies aborad, there formjng an independent life moving away from your parents house is considered a norm, and one does not need to share or surrender portion/whole of their earning to their parents, which is very prevalent among a lot of working class to middle class families here, regardless whether the people in this sub will be able to relate to this or kot based on their socio-economic standing.

This is one of the unquestioned cultural norm I feel is unfair to young people, as it puts all the load on their shoulder without them having any chance to explore their own life beyond the relentless necessity of money and subsequent desperation for employment.

Moreover such dynamics also interfere with regular course of adulting for people, where having a partner and wanting to establish one self independently with them is seen with dissaproval and at times with spite by the family members, causing further tension in the spousal dynamics.

But all this for what reason? Because people are too greedy to look that another human life does not owe them an alleviation from their own suffering.

Tell me what you guys think about this and whether your own personal life has been impacted by such an observation?

a couple of months ago, i used to talk to a guy who seemed perfect on my paper. i almost manifested this person into being. i was very upfront with him about my childfree stance from day 1 and he said he doesn’t want kids at the moment too AND that he wasn’t sure if he’d want them in the future.

we spoke for a couple of weeks and he seemed quite emotionally mature. But he somehow couldn’t separate his wants from what his family would expect from him and he feared that being with me would make him lose his community?

everything was going so smoothly except for the fact that he left my childfree question hanging. i gave him an ultimatum that he needs to think about it and let me know because it didn’t make sense to me to form an emotional bond with someone with whom i would know things would end eventually because of this.

we had the conversation, he clearly still didn’t know what he wanted and said that wasn’t fair to me so it’s best to end it.

i am staunchly childfree and at the same time i’m someone who always questions my stance, it helps me evolve and grow from my older self. it’s kinda pathetic writing this on a child-free subreddit but we’re not machines programmed to operate only how we’re coded. i call this part of the human experience lol

anyways, this whole situation got me thinking if i didn’t do justice by the product of my manifestation? i ended it over something that can possibly change for me 5 years down the line and if that’s the case, i would really regret not giving him a proper chance. it’s quite possible that he could also come to this side of being child-free

i want to know the thoughts of the people on this subreddit and probably learn from your personal experiences, if y’all have had any

​

You may have seen my post this Monday, because I didn't know the rules T_T Reposting today on the correct day!

I'm gonna be so vulnerable guis, don't bully me😿

Helew everyone (⁠✿^⁠‿^⁠) Gonna textually yap for a second, thenx

Looking for a long term relationship which turns into life-time partnership 🙂‍↕️

I've known I was going to remain childfree for life since I was 13. In my little noggin I reflected back on who I was as a child, what I've become, and I decided no children are coming from me ☝️ That wish has only become stronger as the political climate (and actual climate) of the country has transformed over the years. But most importantly, I don't trust myself to be a good parent, and I would HATE to pass on trauma.

Next, things about me <⁠(⁠￣⁠︶⁠￣⁠)⁠>

I am currently living in Kolkata, but since my father had a transferrable job, I grew up in many cities. Mostly northern India though, save for Bangalore. I am open to relocating later on, and starting with LDR.

Gonna be honest guys, this is the vulnerable part. I am chronically ill. The smallest part of it that I'm comfortable sharing publicly is that I have CFS/ME. Because of my chronic illness, I have a lot of limitations in my life. I can't do physical activites all that much because after that I crash and am ill for a couple of days. I do travel, go out and about, but it's just not a regular thing because of my magical bag of illnesses ❤️‍🔥

Being chronically ill also means that I'm unable to hold any traditional jobs. I am an artist, but a terrible business owner because I genuinely haaaate marketing and "selling" my skills eyughk. Thankfully, my parents have arranged things for me financially, and I am living comfortably thanks to them. (I am privileged I know, but I need this privilege to survive little bit T_T)

Okay, onto more interesting things 👁️👄👁️

My interests include collecting crafting skills like a maniac, and then gifting people things they want 😈 I crochet, paint, make jewellery, etc.? I like reading too. I used to read a lot, but then stopped around covid. I recently picked up reading again, and for the time being it's fantasy books I'm gobbling down. As a child I was a dancer, I learnt Kathak, Bharatnatyam, and Odissi. That obviously stopped after I fell ill lol.

I like going on long drives, I myself don't drive though 😬

Oh, I have a cat! I love all types of animals, I'm not biased. I //would// try and pet a tiger.

Finally, who am I looking for?

Age range: 26-29, maybe 30.

I love me a gentle, calm, and composed man. Left leaning definitely. I need you to hate AI please 😩Orange cat energy, although it contradicts the first sentence in this para 😈 Physical intimacy is not a big part of my life, but I am still looking for someone who is attractive to me. Need not be conventionally attractive, obviously.

Alright I can't think of anything else, please ask in the comments if you want to know about anything 👁️👄👁️

Had couple- friends here in Canada who are basically from Punjab/Himachal. We would hang out and go for walk and the wife would call me to discuss from one thing to another and we would talk for hours. This couple is my husband’s colleagues.

Given it’s a different country, making friends itself is difficult here. So, we were glad to have at least these people and they knew we are CF.

Now here comes the situation - last year Oct 2025, the female completely shunned me - ghosted. No calls, no msgs, nothing. And it had me thinking what’s going on - hope everything is fine back home for them. I reached out to talk to her , texted her. However, she acted very weird with me.

After many efforts I gave up but it just hurt so much as to what did I do. I went down rabbit hole ( overthinking is my specialty) but no answer and complete radio silence.

In April, my partner told me that she is expecting and completed her 2nd trimester. Her husband told my partner in office - so she didn’t text or gave this news.

She had her baby in June and last week they sent my husband an invite for both of us to attend the prayer meet and insisted that we both should come. I didn’t know what to do - I was completely ghosted by them - my attending that meet up didn’t make sense to me. So, my partner attended it and I sent them a hand written note congratulating them with a gift card. She didn’t send me any acknowledgment of even that.

Her mom kept insisting my partner to bring me to their home to talk.

Is this normal?? Do you ghost your people like this?? Did she believe that I would bring any bad luck ? M just spiralling on this behaviour!

We’re a married couple in our late 30s, based in Bangalore, and are hoping to meet other childfree married and vegetarian couples in Bangalore for genuine, platonic friendship.

Life tends to get quite busy with work and other commitments, and we thought it would be nice to connect with people who share a similar outlook and lifestyle. Being childfree is important to us, as we feel it gives us a natural point of connection.

We enjoy good conversations, food, coffee, travel and spending time with like-minded people.

Ideally looking to meet couples around a similar stage of life. Happy to start with a coffee and take it from there.

For me, honestly it’s not just one moment there are so many random situations where I’m like yep definitely made the right decision 😂

One of the biggest ones is whenever parents fight at home. Even for simple/small things they start arguing or fighting and I’m just sitting there thinking fuck this shit. I’m a very quiet and peace loving person and I want peace around me always. I genuinely cannot imagine coming home after work and then having to deal with kids screaming, crying, fighting, asking for things, etc. every fucking day!!!

Same thing when travelling in bus, train, plane whenever there’s a kid crying or screaming continuously and disturbing everyone I’m like thank god that’s not my problem 💀. Even in movie theatres I know kids are kids and obviously they don’t understand how to behave sometimes but personally I just cannot deal with that level of noise and chaos.

And travelling by train has also made me think about another side of it you pass through villages or poorer areas and sometimes see families who can barely afford basic necessities but still have kids. Sometimes you see children on the streets asking for food or money I’ve seen this multiple times in real life and obviously you start wondering how difficult their lives must be, I’m not saying poor people shouldn’t have children or anything like that but it does make me think about how much responsibility bringing a child into the world actually is.

Then there are the smaller things as well like if you have some item at home that you care about or something expensive/delicate guests come over and their kid starts touching everything playing with it or accidentally breaks something. You'll be there standing not to lose your shit 😂

And since I’ve been staying in Bengaluru for the last 3 years the education costs have been another WTF moment for me seriously! I keep seeing posts about LKG/UKG school fees going around ₹2.5 lakh or even more. Like WTF really? 😭 Parents are actually earning and spending that much money for LKG/UKG where kids are basically learning ABCs, numbers and basic communication/social skills. Then comes tuition, coaching, college, entrance exams, all the competition and pressure and we already know how fucked up the Indian education system is you spend a huge amount of money and the kid still has to go through the same rat race shit!!!

I look at all this and like yea I’m perfectly happy ending the bloodline!!!! 😂

Hello everyone :)

Have been lurking around for a while, figured I would throw my hat into the CF4CF ring and see what happens.

I am 30F, 5’6”, based in Thane and working a ridiculously hectic consulting job in Mumbai. I am a postgraduate and have spent a suspiciously large portion of my adult life collecting qualifications.

I love Bollywood and animated movies, generally prefer hindi and techno music, enjoy travelling and discovering new places, although my current job has made travel considerably more aspirational than practical.

I am extremely social and close to my friends and family. I am usually the unofficial therapist in my friend groups, partly because I genuinely like listening and partly because I am nosy but prefer to call it “context.” I am protective of my people and will show up for them.

Personality-wise, I am a weirdo with a rotating cast of personalities: self-aware, opinionated, stubborn, sarcastic, easily excited and perpetually unserious, all while being a responsible adult against my will. I need people, but also occasionally need to disappear and be left alone. I can turn a completely unnecessary topic into a full-blown debate just because I researched it last night.

I am religious in a fairly low-key way. I enjoy celebrating festivals and visiting places of worship, but do not actively practise every day. I would want someone who respects that, whether or not he is religious himself.

I eat non-veg, drink and smoke occasionally, and should probably exercise more. I love pets and have one who is the apple of my eye. Liking animals is important; liking mine is non-negotiable. He was here first.

Career-wise, I am less interested in endlessly climbing a ladder and more interested in figuring out what makes me happy. I am exploring opportunities overseas, but am also open to eventually moving to a smaller city in India.

I am looking for someone who balances me rather than mirrors me: funny, emotionally mature, intellectually curious, financially responsible, socially comfortable, passionate about something and capable of having an actual conversation.

Having a sense of humour is very, very important.

I am looking for a long-term relationship that may eventually lead to marriage. Ideally, we are two people with our own lives, interests, friends and identities who genuinely enjoy making room for each other. I want a partner to experience life with, without either person becoming the other’s entire life.

I am extremely close to my family, and it would be nice if a partner had a similarly healthy relationship with his own.

Deal-breakers include having strong patriarchal or gender-role expectations, emotional unavailability, unwillingness to communicate, disliking animals, having no life or interests of your own, or viewing relationships as projects where one person needs fixing. I am not a project, and neither are you.

Mostly, I am looking for someone who enjoys his own life and wants a partner to experience more of it with. Independent without being emotionally distant, affectionate without being clingy, serious when it matters and completely ridiculous when it does not.

If you can keep up with the banter, make me laugh, and tell me when I am being ridiculous, we might get along very well. :)

The world that existed 20-30 yrs back was a better world and it doesnt exist anymore..

If I was in that era may be I would consider bringing a new life into the world because back then the future never felt so uncertain and the world did not feel like it was full of monsters of all kinds

So stop telling me what if your parents also decided to the CF, because frankly their world made sense, and the world we have right now, makes no sense at all!

How looking at the beautiful canopy of trees getting showered with beautiful rains, while sipping a cup of tea at my window got me thinking…may be the only way to find your person, in this world consisting of billions, is to keep trying..
So here I am, trying.

I’m 34F. I live in a tier two city, recently moved here from a tier one city owing to my work, and boy, am I loving the slow life here!

Recent years and experiences have taught me a good deal of self-awareness, empathy, and (even though it may sound counter-intuitive to the kind of post I am making), a non-believer in romance and butterflies. What do believe in, still, is a strong friendship, an even stronger sense of physical chemistry, and (if that’s possible) an even more stronger sense of selflessness in a relationship.

About me

I am 5’7”. I lead a physically active lifestyle. I like to hit the gym regularly and eat consciously (although you might find me devouring a bowl of chocolate ice cream once in a while, lol).

I was married previously. My paperwork finished in early 2024.

I like to read. My type of reads are mainly fiction and a little bit of poetry.

I love to cook, although I am mindful of the fact that it’s not practical to cook three meals a day every day with the kind of demanding job that I have.

I am a creative at heart and try my hand sometimes at painting, writing, etc.

I am (apparently just like everyone else on the Internet is) an avid traveller. And a trekker. I took a few months breaks from work last year and travelled around the world solo, and ended it with a Himalayan trek. The way this break shaped me is unlike anything else. It taught me a great deal about importance of independence, courage and liking one’s own company.

Recent years of introspection has led me to a decision that I want a child free life. The reasons for this is a bit too personal, and disclosing that may need some vulnerability. Therefore I don’t want to state it here.

I am doing very well in my career. And although I am not a lavish spender, I do like it if I don’t have to think twice before spending on experiences and travel.

I am in a transferable job, that would keep taking to a different city of the country every 5-6 years. I understand that can be tough to manage for many. But alas, it is what it is as far as my job goes.

Things I’d like to have in my partner

I would be lying if I said physical attraction doesn’t matter to me. It does. A great deal. Therefore, I would really appreciate it if we can share pictures with each other in the initial conversations.

I really value fitness. I automatically respect someone more if I see that they make efforts to take care of their own body.

I’d love it if my partner is taller than me. Me being a 5’7” automatically increases the height bar for my prospective match.

A thing that is of the utmost importance to me is that you know that you are in here with a serious intension, and are ready to make efforts for it. If you’re someone who loses interest after a few conversations, even if things appear to fall beautifully in place, I request you to kindly not DM me and not waste my time.

I want an independent household for myself and my partner in the future. I do understand that aging parents (of both the partners) require care and attention. But I believe that there can be many other sincere and genuine ways to take care of them than living together in a single house.

I would want my prospective partner to share my child free mindset. It’s almost impossible that I may change my views, so kindly don’t get into this while having a background thought that you’ll change my thinking in future. It’s just about compatibility.

Lastly, I would love it if my partner is settled in his career. Money doesn’t matter a great deal to me, I am earning a very good salary. But, someone who’s still in two minds about changing his career in his late thirties or even later, wouldn’t bode well with me. I am craving a peaceful future, lazy Sunday afternoons with some mindless binging on Netflix. The sheer amount of effort to build a career from scratch is not something that I want to be a part of at this juncture of my life.

Sorry for the really long post, but if you think these points resonate with, kindly DM me with a brief introduction of yourself.
(I won’t be responding to mere ‘hiis/hellos’, just to filter out non-serious people).

Pretty much the title. I've always thought i dont have maternal instincts and don't like children in general. However I've been on the fence about having a child of my own in future. Now that I'm nearing 30, suddenly it feels like all decisions that i take now will have much bigger consequences for life.

I've been thinking a lot about this but somehow end up thinking maybe this is what I feel right now and maybe i will eventually change my mind, but i dont want to enter a relationship/marriage not knowing for sure. How did you all figure out you are childfree and that it's a non negotiable for you?