I've noticed a pattern with myself and I'm curious if anyone else experiences this. Like most people here, I need an emotional bond and trust before I can even remotely see someone as a possible sexual partner. But I've noticed that once those prerequisites are met, I still seem to need some sort of sexual contact - even something as small as a sexually charged conversation - to kind of "lock in" my feelings and make that attraction feel solidified. Is this weird? Does this still fall under demisexuality or does anyone else experience attraction this way?

I know it is a tough subject, and I am sorry if it not welcomed here..

I have always considered myself as a lesbian demisexual, I am 28 and felt desire for only 3 persons in my entire life.

I have a lot of health issues since I am born, and I know that I carry generational traumas linked to sexual assaults.. I am also ADHD and probably AUDHD

Theses last months, I had a lot of hormonal changes in my life : stopped the pill after 10 years under it, stop my antidepressants I had for 5 years, and other hormonal issues starting to be balanced, and working with my traumas and limits with a new psy .

I know that sexual attraction and sex drive are completely different things, but I am wondering if, with all of these factors, I could maybe feel desire for some women easier.

I don't fully understand my functioning, what makes me desire a woman but I would say physical touch and emotional connexion.

I look at women differently, and feel way more connected to my body ... I recently felt a lot of pleasure for one of my friend ( I have a great connection with her, but she's already in a relationship), I discover what it is to feel that much desire and having sexual energy this way...

I wouldn't say I can feel desire for a woman I don't have a connection for, but I am wondering if these factors could lead to become allosexual ?

( maybe I am delusional and just hope I could become allosexual )

I seem to be only attracted to a very specific type of man physically, and unfortunately, those men rarely approach me, show interest in me, or seem attracted to me. Because of that, I sometimes feel like I have to settle.

Lately, I've been really horny for months, and I've been meeting guys specifically with the intention of having an FWB situation. They're nice and average looking, but I don't feel that strong sexual attraction toward them. The kind where I look at someone and immediately want them. However, because I've been so horny, it seems like my body becomes aroused simply from being close to a man, and I don't have a problem having sex with them (I've done this before).

The sex is okay. It's not like it's the best sensation in the world. Sometimes I feel like the best part of sex happens in my head, and the reality isn't actually that amazing. I wonder if that's because I've never been in a relationship or had sex with someone I'm genuinely, strongly attracted to.

So, having sex with these men is fine. I'll kiss them and be intimate with them, but I don't really feel much emotionally or sexually toward them. At least my sexual urges are satisfied afterward. I don't really regret doing it, but part of me feels like I'm giving my body away too easily and that I should have higher standards. At the same time, I'm in my 30s and haven't had much sexual or relationship experience, so I genuinely want to experiment and explore my sexuality.

I guess I'm trying to figure out whether this is normal or has happened to you, or whether there's something about the way I experience sexual attraction that I don't understand yet.

TLDR; im confused, a bit lost, and trying to understand

TTLDR; IM HAVING A PERSONAL CRISIS

So I know this is probably posted a gazillion times, but im going to add one more! This has been a short deep dive in my spare time, and been a little self discovery-ish. I would also like to preface the fact that I am a married man in a deadbedroom situation (going on 3 years of meds and hormones killing her libido), considered fwb's (i know, burn me at the cross if you want but i didnt go through with it), cant do hookups, and it lead me down this freaking rabbit hole..... enjoy this mess. 😅

Preface, the adhd was doing its thing at work today when I came across a post on reddit (of course) and here I am.

In all 31 years of my life I knew I was a little different than most of my peers. Wasn't sure what it was. Fast forward to high-school. I was raised in a strict religious conservative house, so for the longest I didnt know what half of this stuff was (still learning). Senior year I had the self realization that I might be bi. But again, small conservative community so you best not speak out about it. Started to realize I couldn't do hookups but thought it was due to my raising.

Skip forward to 19yo. Had a few friends going to college while I worked, we'd all get together and they'd talk right? Things they hear and see at college, hookups, all that. Not appealing to me. But whatever. At this time I knew I like guys and girls (or was open to them at least). But still I had never acted on it right, stigma and all that. And they were talking about people liking pans? (Yeah, I know now lol).

Skip ahead, I met someone whom I love dearly and would never leave. We're married 9 amazing years (still). But now ive got a job where i have time on my hands most days..

Which brings us here. In my rabbit hole of discovery the post I fell upon was about pansexuals. Well it interested me cause I didnt know much about it or whatever. Low and behold allll the digging lead me to asking gemini (cause why tf not). A little chat with gemini and it gave me a few things to look into. Scary part is that it all was clicking in the convo. Like i was findinga lot of the missing puzzle pieces to who i am. But there's a little bit of the chat that Ill post that here.. ;

​

Panromantic (or Biromantic): Your romantic drive and who you could see yourself building a long-term life with is based entirely on personality, vibe, and connection, regardless of their gender.

Pansexual / Bisexual: You are physically/sexually open to multiple genders and expressions—women, men, trans folks, tomboys, and non-binary people. (Pansexual emphasizes that gender isn't a dealbreaker; Bisexual is the broader, widely recognized umbrella term).

Demisexual: Sexual desire and wanting to actually be intimate with someone only unlocks after a strong emotional connection, shared humor, or personal vibe is established.

Androsexual: Attraction specifically toward masculine energy, presentation, or styles (which explains your visual pull toward tomboys, masc lesbians, trans men, and certain guys).

​Limerence: Not a sexual label, but a psychological term describing the tendency to hyper-fixate on a new connection, wanting to know everything about them instantly, and feeling a spike of anxiety/panic if they don't reply.

............

So needless to say im not real sure what to think.. I dont know where i fit in now or how id describe myself because I feel like all the assumptions I had about myself were wrong. I know this is going to be a journey, im very self aware and intellectual, very observant, but this is all new territory for me

I think the thing I dont understand is I feel like an outlier of sorts? Libido is high, but I cant do hookups without a connection to the person. I have to know them to crave them sort of thing. And the most confusing part is attraction. Because I am sexually attracted to certain personalities, looks, and people but could never do it without that bond. I can see an attractive person and be aroused and it go away, but I can also hqve a traditionally unattractive friend ive know a year or two and want them more than a Calvin Klein model😅 so I really am at a loss because some things fit but others seem like they may not.. like i can hyper-fixate on a good personality and chat and then thats allll I think about. It can happen over time, or in a month of getting to know someone. I dont really know cause things fit and things dont..

Am I even in the right group?😅

Hi all, recently I’ve been questioning if I am truly demisexual.
I first discovered this spectrum of sexuality some years ago and felt it really resonated with me, however I am currently in a developing relationship and the question of why I don’t want to have/or initiate sex has come up - this is a subject that is constant in any relationship I have been in and I’m starting to reflect on whether I am demisexual or if another term/label might better describe me.

I think sex is fine but I do not actively engage in it, I’ve had one night stands and dont like them. I don’t mind having sex with my partner if I have enough time to get into the mood - and by this I mean get into the frame of mind that I’ll be having sex with my partner, but I’m not excited by the prospect.
Don’t get me wrong it’s nice when I have it, but if I have to choose between having sex with someone and being intimate alone, I’d rather do it alone.

I would say that I can come across as sexual, I have sex toys and like the idea of kinky stuff/ exploratory sex but when it comes to initiating with another person I tend to just let them do whatever and I freeze up. I feel like I like the idea of being sexual more than being sexual.

I’ve looked into Demiromantic and think that does sound a bit like me, but then I’m not sure as above I can be sexual but it’s really rare.

Any help would be appreciated!

-just a side note, I’m looking for terms to better understand myself and to help with my current relationship and any others thereafter. I know the spectrum is big and there can be cross over so some guidance with this is what I’m hoping folks can help me with ❤️

Edit: to further add; I believed I was demisexual because I only find that I am attracted to people after getting to know them over a period of time. I don’t think I have ever found anyone I’ve started to feel attraction towards, sexual … I maybe feel that parts of a person are sexy(?!) like big arms for eg, but again don’t have a desire to have sex with them. I’ve wondered if grey sexual or Demiromantic might be a better fit for me? 🥹🥲

Do we even have crushes, or do we just skip straight to love? I've never developed feelings that feel casual. I can't even imagine it to be honest.

It's rough out here 😭 being a demi queer person, I don't know how to go about dating irl. I don't have much experience that went anywhere tbh. I'm in my 30's, never been kissed 😭 not a real one imo. I've had a lot of troubling talking stages that never went anywhere substantial. The one "relationship" I had I always questioned where I stood and never felt desired, not even for a kiss; couldn't even ask for one tbh (which clearly screamed that they were an asshole for continuing to lead me on). Anyways, I have a possible first date casual vibe outing coming up but just in terms of thinking for future references, idk how I'd approach not being comfortable just kissing someone out of the blue or the societal typical way. Seeing that there needs to be a big emotional connection, I don't really know how to express that my nervous system needs to feel safe to even *allow* something as -basic as a kiss-. I mean, is it awkward to explain the whole demi thing (even as far as kissing to someone) on a first or second date?? I feel like it'll come off as me over explaining but then again it's important bc I have to be comfortable with any kind of intimacy 🤷‍♀️

I don't even know what the fuck I'm doing, no one has ever made me feel safe to even 'experiment' just for the fun of it bc they found me to be shy and endearing and WILLINGLY wanted to kiss me 🙃 I fear I'll never get there because ppl always assume.... and I can't even fathom more than that because a kiss is already terrifying. I've had failed kissing attempts in the past and none that I felt actually comfortable and guided and just reassured....

Yet my libido is always skyrocketing and I can't do anything about that either ugh; no one understands that I just can't hookup for the hell of it and get feeling so touch starved for a hug even--- I was hoping someone would here.

[Preface - I don’t know If I should share this with AuDHD, Demisexual, GERD, ARFID Reddit groups so if you’re reading this wondering why I’m sharing this here, it’s because they overlap for me at least]

This morning I had one of those epic shower cries - always cathartic. The thought that brought me to crying though is something I need to dig into and I’m hoping by sharing my thoughts on it this morning that it will resonate with someone on here.

I observed that I’m touch starved. To be more specific, starved of longer sustained touch. A long hug, a cuddle, even touching shoulders sitting next to someone for a long time. Welcoming hugs from friends and families when greeting or saying goodbye are lovely - even a hug of congratulations or in support when something isn’t going well are lovely, however they are still different than regular longer sustained touch and by a trusted loved one (partner, friend, or family).

My last memory of receiving this level of touch is when I was a child and it ended when I like many kids I think start getting self conscious about being seen being hugged or kissed on the cheek by their parents. At that point and beyond it turned into at best sitting on the couch and touch was at best the shoulder to shoulder lean - though I’d take even that today.

Here I am 41, single, arguable succeeding on paper in most categories (I have a nice home and supportive job, and loving friends and family), but I long for more socialization like many in the year 2026 but not just that I want more touch.

Then comes thinking about how to solve for it and what’s holding me back:

GERD: I have GERD (acid reflux), which causes chronic bad breath as a side effect. It’s not a hygiene issue, it's the reflux itself bringing stomach contents up into my throat. I brush, floss, use mouthwash, and yet the bad breath returns so quickly it seems.

Phsycogenic gag reflex: I also have a hypersensitive/psychogenic gag reflex combined with a strong sense of smell. This means when I catch even a faint unfamiliar or unpleasant scent, I can start gagging uncontrollably, and the only fix is putting distance between me and the smell. When it’s related to a person, It's not about the person; it's a physiological reflex I don't have control over but I'm always afraid it reads as "I think you're gross," when really it's just my nervous system overreacting to input most people wouldn't even register!

These things also overlap with my AuDHD and ARFID.

I have no doubt that I could reach out to a friend or family member and ask for something like movie nights or simple hang outs where we sit close to each other. What I fear, and very greatly fear, is that they’ll be impacted by my bad breath and not tell me and just quietly decline future invites. Also, ironically, I fear my psychogenic gag reflex will turn into me doing exactly that to them because I don’t know how to communicate that a smell coming from their body is giving me a reaction without hurting them - even if they knew it was connected to this condition I have and that anyone else that came into the room and sat with them wouldn't notice a damn thing - nobody wants to hear they smell bad and I know I would be forever worried when being around the person that told me that.

I have considered the idea of connecting with a “cuddle party” group, cuddle therapist, regular massage therapy, or something of the like, but I really really long for regular touch with a loved one, platonic or romantic.

I’ll leave it there. Thank you to anyone that takes the time to read this and to anyone that contributes thoughts and perspectives in the comments.

Looking for some fun zero pressure date ideas that would appeal to demisexual women that's different from dinner and a movie?

I'm partial to more interactive dates like a cooking class or workshop of sorts but wanted to see what appealed to others on this spectrum?

i was told by my therapist this is “not normal”…

Like, on an intellectual level I realize that some non-demis are totally fine with random hook ups and would be interested in taking advantage of hooking up with, say, a celebrity they're obsessed with.

But, at the same time, I just dont get it. Just because someone is a good actor/musician/etc, is super hot, is super rich, etc. doesn't mean they'll be good in bed or that you'll have any kind of connection at all. This is especially true for people you haven't met like celebrities.

So, what's the point of a hall pass? By definition, a hall pass would mean you're already in some sort of committed relationship (otherwise you wouldn't need to ask permission). But if you have that and it's real and good and you don't want to break up for some other reason, why would you even want to hook up with some other one-off person? I mean, in theory you're already satisfied in your relationship and I imagine this would really only come up spontaneously which means it's not like you'd have time to both get STD tested, which probably is even more important if the person is someone who's having sex with a lot of people (not shaming here, just speaking statistically). And you wouldn't know them well enough to trust them about important stuff like, well, basically any part of sex (STDs, birth control, emotional and physical comfort, etc).

And then you're risking your stable relationship on top of it. I dont get it. I can recognize someone is hot, but that's never made me want to fuck them. In my head maybe I could think about getting to talk to them, really know them, find out they're sweet and we connect on stuff, etc and *then* get turned on enough to have sex, but in that case, there's so much emotional attachment it would feel far more intrusive and damaging to the existing relationship with the current partner. And then you should probably just break up anyways.

Idk, I guess this is just random ramblings. I suppose as demis we'll never really get to know because that's just not how we work, but yeah, I don't get the hall pass thing.

I actually love the positivity on this subreddit, so accordingly I will bring the mood down now. I just wanted to check in if anybody else had my personal "canon event". I asked someone out for the first time when I was 23, I got a rejection despite me being pretty sure she liked me.

After that all the floodgates just opened. The fact I asked my first person out at 23, the fact I lost essential you person experiences, the fact I will have to twist and turn to fit in my whole life. My journey of discovering my sexuality has been very enlightening, but man is getting there hard.

This is mainly a rant, sorry about that lol. I truly appreciate this community, it is so good to know others are facing the same struggles. I love you all <3

Hi Everyone. I've been reading a lot of different things online to figure out if I'm demi and I just get more confused. I do enjoy having sex, but ONLY if I have an emotional connection.

And I can't stress this enough, that without emotional connection, sex is just outright boring, and so gross I can't even finish. I only let myself try it once, with a very attractive man and it was like eating chocolate chip cookies with no chocolate chips, and some of the sugar was replaced with salt, totally yuck.

Part of my confusion is that I do feel sexual attraction to people, but it doesn't mean I actually want to have sex with them. For example, I can find someone attractive and feel sexual desire, but if they turn me off emotionally, they might as well be a slime as far as my attraction for them goes.

The opposite is true as well. I might not find someone attractive at first, but if we connect emotionally, suddenly I might find myself drooling over how hot I find them.

I appreciate any insight you have for me. Thank you in advance.

Demisexual here! Found out later in life what that was and why I didn't have the same sexual attraction as allosexual folk. Well! One thing for sure I didn't know was the explosion of lust you feel when you found someone who touches on everything you need to feel healthy, happy, and safe. I met someone during a convention in March of this year and he has been steady, consistent, honest, and kind. FYI, I identify as a Brat as well, and I totally do not brat when I'm talking to him. He had made me feel so safe and secure that I felt love for him before the actual act. When we finally did become intimate I went completely feral, growls, high sexual energy, just constantly aroused when I was near him or if he just gently touched me. I have never had a person meet my needs at such a high degree, so I was always hesitant or self conscious or unsure when having sex. Has anyone had this feeling when their needs are completely met? Can you tell me if this has happened to you or another demisexual?

P.S. I don't have sex because it brings connection I can't emotionally deal with if I am not feeling committed too or deeply cared about or me caring about the other person. I hadn't had sex for over 5 months prior, let's just say this man who flipped the switch has me on cloud nine.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Dcsf80todG2

Karminker on Instagram created a flowchart of different sexualities. I thought it might be interesting for this community and also understanding the other sexualities that are out there. The Instagram link is to her reel introducing the chart. The Drive link is for the cleaned up digital version

A major caveat: this is designed as a decision tree, but as Karminker acknowledged in her post, multiple sexual identities may apply to a person. So when reaching an end point, it's good to go back a re-explore the different paths.

It’s basically what the title says, except it isn’t just physical. I no longer find his mindset, thought processes, or behavior attractive either.

My fiancé (32) and I (29) are long-distance, both demisexual, and both relatively late bloomers. Because emotional connection and trust play such a huge role in attraction for me, I was very upfront before we got serious about what I needed.
One major conversation was whether he could realistically afford a long-distance relationship. I didn’t want to be the only person paying and putting in the effort to see each other. He assured me he could.
Over time, I learned that several things he told me weren’t true.
He lied about his previous sexual experience, which came out after he tried initiating sex with me. When I confronted him, I essentially wasn’t allowed to discuss it because he was embarrassed.
He also hid significant information about his mental and physical health. Because we’re long-distance, it took months for me to realize how much I didn’t know. Most of it finally came out around month 10 after a hospitalization due to hunger strike due to a conversation about splitting up led to his mother calling me and asking what I had done to him.
That conversation filled in a lot of gaps.
I realized he had presented himself as capable of maintaining the relationship we discussed even though he knew he couldn’t realistically afford it. His explanation was essentially that he loved me too much to let me go and find someone more compatible.
That mentality is actually a huge part of why I’ve lost attraction.
I would not leave someone simply because they were struggling financially, dealing with mental illness, or sexually inexperienced. What I cannot accept is someone withholding or misrepresenting important information because they’re afraid the truth might cause me to make a choice they don’t want.
His mental-health struggles have also become intertwined with our relationship in ways I cannot manage. There have been extreme reactions when things go wrong, repeated calls while I’m working or studying, and then family members contacting me when I don’t respond. I’ve been shamed for supposedly not caring enough about my partner, while cultural pressure to marry has increased because he disclosed inaccurate details about our intimacy to his family.
Meanwhile, I’m in school trying to build my own life.
The irony is that he cannot understand why I’m no longer attracted to him.
For me, being demisexual means attraction is heavily connected to the person I emotionally bond with. I became attracted to him because of who I believed he was and because I trusted him. As that trust disappeared, so did the attraction.
It wasn’t his finances, mental health, or lack of experience that changed how I saw him. It was the lying, withholding information, emotional pressure, boundary violations, and the belief that being in love somehow makes those things acceptable.
Our families are now close and planning an engagement party, while internally I’m at the point where I don’t want this relationship anymore.
I do have empathy for him. I understand how intense first experiences with love and intimacy can feel, and part of me doesn’t want to taint those memories for him.
But I’m emotionally and mentally exhausted, and I’m realizing that protecting his idea of our love story cannot require me to keep participating in a relationship I no longer want.
At this point, I feel like I have to choose myself.

-this has ended

I don’t even know how to explain sometimes I wonder if I really feel romance with someone or I’m just getting used to them since we’re close, know everything and talk about everything?? It just isn’t how it is in the movies which I’m sure is exaggerated.

Ex: I’m friend with someone for some time, I think he has crush on me, and made me think that I like him too (not sure to what extent) but idk if it’s because I actually do or because I’m so familiar and comfortable with him I wouldn’t mind if we’re together. But it doesn’t feel “lovey dovey” I’m not sure how to explain it.

I see him as my baby, and I wouldn’t mind if we kissed or had sexual relation, but I guess I don’t necessarily feel “love” it still feels platonic. I would never want to hurt him, hes my male bff, we’ve been through thick and thin. He’s my everything but not in the romantic / sexual way.

HELP! I myself can’t even grasp this?!!?

I never liked someone on my own, it’s always the person liking me then me liking them back (after sometime) it’s like shrug why not, let’s give it a whirl.

So at this point I identify as gay and also somewhere between asexual and demisexual (I'm still trying to figure out). I broke up with my boyfriend (of 4 and a half years) about 3 months ago and at that point I didn't even know demisexuality was a thing.

My brain always blocked this feeling these past few years because I thought something's wrong with me but a lot times, sex with him just felt like a chore, something to get out of the way.

I'm a very late learner on this whole thing but for me it was always an emotional experience. For me, to be intimate with someone is the whole package of being attracted to their personality, how they look (looks are a preference of course, everyone has one, for some it's more important, for others less so) and also the type of connection we've built over time. I enjoy the lead-up to it more than the actual thing. I love kissing, undressing each other, touching, everything, and also the fact that we are so close that we give consent to each other to do that also turns me on a little.

The thing is, he never seemed to enjoy these things. I guess the biggest disconnect was the fact that I am not really into doing back stuff (neither as a top or bottom) while he only liked to do that and found everything else about sex boring. There was even a point when we were arguing about sex and he lashed out at me saying that I have such a weird concept that we need all this kissing and touching every single time, he said he just wants me to f him and be done with it. That really killed things for me since I never got what I wanted. Nearly two years ago he actually cheated on me. His reason for that is that he wanted to break up with me and he knows how much I love(d) him and he thought it would make it easier but now that he did it he doesn't want to break up anymore. He opened up about the fact that he was going through some other things mentally (and while I think it's still not okay to cheat on someone because of that), I forgave him all things considered. The thing is, it was actually our sex life that he had a problem with me the most. Because of that I thought that we're good I just have to get better at having sex and do it more often (yeah in retrospect I recognize how messed up that whole thing was lol). The problem is that this put even more pressure on me to perform well while he didn't change too much, wasn't more emotionally available (well he was for a week and then things went back to "normal") and he even complained that doing it 2-3 times a week is still not enough for him, he wants more.

I put in so much effort into "becoming better", I even went to a doctor, got a testosterone test, they even prescribed me a pill that I could take sometimes before (because I did have problems due to him not putting enough emotional effort into it). He also put pressure on me for not being able to finish so I had to make up weird fantasies in my mind every single time in order to do so.

These past few months I've had this feeling that I might be on the asexual spectrum (which could also be the case since even in a good relationship I probably wouldn't mind if sometimes we took a week or two off from "actual sex" since there are a million other fun things to do as a couple) but demisexuality is starting to make so much sense (I've only recently heard about the fact that this is a thing). I feel that I'm much less ashamed to admit what I want and I don't mind admitting that I don't necessarily want to sleep with someone on a first or second date. Maybe after that I'd have fun just spending the night with them, sleeping together but not necessarily having sex. And maybe just gradually start experimenting with more and more stuff (like starting with kissing first, then later cuddling, undressing, etc...) and just find out what both of us like and form a sexual connection that way, as our relationship develops and actually be honest with each other about what we enjoy and what we don't, instead of just doing things that we think we're supposed to be doing or things that someone else wants me to do.

Am I completely crazy here? I feel like I've discovered something about myself while learning about demisexuality (which I'll assume is also a spectrum and I feel like I'm on it).

What is this called?

Kay so in college last year there was this guy, (21M at the time) we never talked much but after I(22F at the time) broke up with my boyfriend (25M) (aka, late January of 2025) there was kind of a weird little will they won't they between us featuring glances and the fact that we sorta started to talk more, laugh at each other's jokes made during class, and I kinda felt physically drawn to him even though I wasn't emotionally attracted to him other than tbe fact that in my head I guess I thought "well, we could have berm friends ' and 'he's funny but otherwise emotionally unreadable" He sorta gave the vibe of there's more to him than meets the eye but he hides behind humour and doesn't like being emotionally vulnerable. But for some reason I found myself drawn to him and wanting to know more about him out of curiosity. Then since like April of 2025 I noticed I didn't really think about him much except for a week or few days before, during and for like 3 days after my period and that's happened every month since, (mind you these thoughts come up unconsciously) I would find myself thinking about how it was cute when he got excited about a thing he liked or remember something he had said or done in class that I thought was funny or cool or something they'd get physical and as soon as the thoughts cane up I would literally lecture myself out loud because I knew I didn't actually like him snd alsohe was a year youngerthan me and idk but even the thought of actually likingsomeoneyoungerthan me feelscreepyunlessthey express they like me first.. But it seems my subconscious liked him even though I didn't if that makes sense or at least my subconscious wanted me to like him that way. Since then I've called it a 'period crush' not a real one, just one that pops up once in a while. Fun to indulge jn your head but not one you'd actually follow-through with in real life. Nothing against him, I just don't feel that way about him in reality. Does anyone else get these or am I going insane, lol?

It had me questioning my demi-ness because I was like, "but you don't have an emotional connection, you just talk in class sometimes and like, 2 of those times were you two fighting "

I’m in my late twenties and I was at a film event where a group of strangers watched various films.

I was sat next to someone, and at first it was kinda like “huh, he looks good”, and then I started actually thinking he was “hot” and feeling an urge to reach out and touch him. It was something about the way he looked, and also his body language.

It was kinda surreal because this neverrrrr happens to me. I only ever get sexually attracted to someone after knowing them for a little bit. I think this might be one of the first times I’ve experienced… feeling sexually attracted to a complete stranger haha. I hadn’t even spoken to him. Later I did initiate an interaction with him, but wasn’t brave enough to try to “flirt” lol.

So… allosexual people have that experience (finding strangers hot and feeling sexually attracted to them) multiple times throughout their lives, eg every week or whatever? Mind = blown lol