My son poops every morning in his car seat. Idk if it is on the way there or when I am getting stuff ready. I have offered MULTIPLE times to change him in the morning.

I am getting passive aggressive comments in his daily sheet about it. I am sending a message to director about it but am I in the wrong for not pulling over and asking to do it there. I have a bad back and they have a high up changing table.

For information purposes: I feed him at 6. I change him and dress him at 6:30. I have an older kid who I have to get ready. I usually have to run upstairs to get a stuff animal or shoes or whatever and I think that may be the time he does it or like I said in the car. I don’t notice it. We leave at 7:30 so it is within an hour of first change.

I put in message that I will diaper cream him at first change because he does get red in mornings during second change aka after daycare arrival.

What more should I do?

Edit to add something that may be important. This is a teacher that does not like me. The other teachers are equivalent to saints and would let me change upon arrival.

I understand tablets are the devil in many teacher’s eyes. I try to limit it as much as I can. Sometimes it is a necessary evil to keep our house running. I also believe it can have some good aspects (such as the educational activities). Again, I try to keep it as limited as possible. My daughter also goes to a daycare that does not have any screens for the kids, most of their day is open, creative play combined with outdoor time. (My daughter also loves going outside at home so I try to take her out as much as possible vs tablet)

Lately, my daughter has been saying a few things about the tablet that I wasn’t sure where she had heard it from, but it also meant she didn’t want it, so I wasn’t arguing. Just things like “I shouldn’t be on my tablet allll the time” or “No tablet in the car”. Again, good habits. But then it slowly became “tablet is bad”, “I need to play with toys, not tablet”, “tablet isn’t smart”, etc. I had a feeling this was coming from daycare, either from her teachers or a child in a screen free house. I still didn’t say anything about it because if it is a child from a screen free household, I don’t want to undermine that parent. I’ve been trying to tell my daughter the tablet is okay sometimes, she can learn from it, etc. But it’s also good to play with toys, go outside, etc. 

Then, yesterday, I was going to pick up. My daughter was sitting with her teacher and some friends. They were looking at letters on the rug and talking about what words start with which letter. They got to T and my daughter said excitedly “tablet”. Teacher sighed and said “yes, tablet does start with T but let’s talk about other things that start with it.” The teacher said a word and another kid said something else, getting praised. My daughter looked disappointed and mumbled “and tablet starts with T”. The teacher nodded and said “it does, you’re right. We’re not talking about tablets right now”. And moved onto the next letter. They hadn’t seen me yet, so I finally made my presence known. Teacher was happy and talkative. My daughter was happy to see me, but I could tell she was still upset with her teacher. At home, she also told me she earlier in the day tried to tell some friends about something exciting she learned on her tablet, but the teacher told her she couldn't talk about the tablet.

Again, I get that tablets are not the be all, end all. But I also don’t want my daughter thinking it’s a bad thing. And I don’t love that she was smart enough to make the letter connection and was pretty much shut down, because it was “tablet”. Same with, her not being able to talk about the fun thing she was excited to share, because "tablet". But I admit, I may be overreacting. My husband told me not to bring it up to the teacher, but I am conflicted. Would it be okay to have a talk with the teacher about not demonizing the tablet, while also encouraging other activities. 

hi everyone I am a assistant toddler teacher and my child attends my center as well in the class below. Today I called out because she had a diarrhea blowout at 5am along with a fever. i had no one able to watch her so i had to make the decision to fully call out myself as well. i’m very close with my one coworker and she messaged me to let me know the director was asking her(she works in the room my kids in) if she was having LBM and a diaper rash the day before, to which she responded yes because that’s the truth. My director then proceeded to question me on everything going on, diaper rash severity, how many BM my child has had and other information that she wouldn’t ask just a regular parent who sends their kid there. Idk what feedback i’m looking for, more so needed to rant because i’m frustrated. I’d never lie about my child and hate being thought of as a liar:/

Hi friends. I'm a mess. I think I need encouragement. Advice -- whatever you have to offer.

I previously taught middle school, and this year I'm an assistant in a primary Montessori classroom (ages 3-6). I feel like I cannot catch my breath.

A parent is concerned bc their student was sent home in the pull up he had on for nap. I wasn't in the nap room, at the time, but I probably should have more emphatically reminded the sub to take it off because it is typically my responsibility. This parent wants a conference with the lead and I am just... so anxious.

I feel like my classroom management needs work. The Montessori classroom is so quiet and I find myself never raising my voice (good thing), but there are occasions when I need to be more firm, and it's like I'm stuck in sing-song soft spoken mode and I don't know how to switch. The kids are testing me big time.

I'm also struggling to wrap my head around all the Montessori materials and keeping up with the students job schedules.

Idk. I feel very insecure. Like I'm overthinking everything. Tell me this gets a little easier a few more weeks in!

Basically what the title says. I went on 3 interviews at one center for an assistant position. 2 of these interviews were working interviews. I even got a bunch of compliments from the staff during the working interviews including how engaged the kids were during the activities I brought, and thanking me for supervising kids while other teachers were busy.

I got an email today that thanked me for my time and told me I didn’t get the job. Basically they said that I wasn’t interactive enough with the kids for the position. They told me that I was unable to connect with young children and that it’s an important part of the position (after only being near these children for 3 hours total) I feel like that’s just kinda crazy! I’m currently an assistant in the age group. I have been for years. I feel like it’s crazy to bring me to 3 interviews just to insult me in the rejection?

To start, I had a boy that was crying for his mom for a little over 3 hours even with home comforts and distractions, and hugs given. - I am not mad about that, at all. I am very sympathetic bc I was the same when I was his age, to the point I was professionally diagnosed w/ Separation Anxiety. Mom ended up picking him up early since he couldn't make it through the day after getting through some meetings at work.

We had another girl and boy visiting from a lower class. Despite all efforts the little girl had a few accidents, which is to be expected at her age the thing is, one of the accidents was so bad that it went through her underwear, pants, and onto our circle time carpet.

And the cherry on top of the cruddy day - It had rained all day so we weren't able to get the kids outside because by the time it stopped raining it was pick up time.

I was so overstimulated from today that I was so close to crying in front of the kids. Today was the cure I needed for wanting kids.

Advice please — no judgment or harsh comments, I’m already very self-aware of my situation
I’m looking for some honest advice, but please be kind. I’m already carrying a lot of guilt about this and I’m not looking for pity or for anyone to tell me that I’m completely in the right.
I work in childcare and lately I’ve been struggling pretty badly with burnout, along with my own mental health. On top of that, I have a very mentally ill family member who has been in and out of the hospital. Recently things became especially bad, to the point where my mom and I were being kept up at night and I was genuinely worried about his safety.
I know everyone has their own lives, stressors and responsibilities, and I understand that at the end of the day, a job is a job. You still have to learn how to manage everything and show up. Unfortunately, I feel like I haven’t found the right way to balance everything yet.
I’ve been feeling extremely overwhelmed and like I can’t juggle everything. I’m scared that this has affected me at work. There have been times where I probably haven’t been the most reliable staff member, and I worry that my head hasn’t always been 100% in the classroom because of everything going on outside of work.
I don’t say that as an excuse. I understand that it’s my responsibility to manage my personal life and my job, and I’m aware that my coworkers and workplace have their own responsibilities too. I guess I’m just struggling with a lot of guilt because I genuinely do care about the children and my job, and I never wanted anyone to think that I don’t care or that I’m not trying.
Recently, I’ve gotten the impression that my hours may be getting cut and that I may potentially be replaced by a new hire. I was moved to another centre because of staffing coverage, but it sounds like new people have since been hired. There hasn’t really been a conversation with me about what’s happening, and I’ve mostly heard things through other staff.
I realize there may not be much I can do about the situation at this point, and maybe this is simply the consequence of how things have gone. But I’m wondering:
Would it be appropriate to write my supervisor/centre a genuine apology letter acknowledging that I haven’t always been as reliable as I should have been? Or would that just make things worse?
I don’t want to make excuses or overshare my family situation as a way of getting sympathy. I mostly want to take accountability, acknowledge that I know I could have handled things better, and express that I do care about my work and would like the opportunity to improve if that opportunity is still there.
I’d also really appreciate advice from people who have experienced burnout, especially while working in childcare/education. What actually helped you recover? How do you prevent yourself from becoming so overwhelmed that it starts affecting your work?
I’ve also wondered whether I may have some undiagnosed ADHD and/or be somewhere on the autism spectrum, because I’ve always struggled with organization, overwhelm and juggling multiple things, although I obviously haven’t been assessed and don’t want to self-diagnose. I think some of it is also a lack of self confidence doubting myself as a good educator at times dose anyone deal with that?
I’m honestly just looking for some perspective and practical advice. I’m very aware that I have things to work on, and I’m trying to figure out how to do better rather than just feeling guilty about what’s already happened.
Thank you to anyone who takes the time to respond, and please keep the comments respectful. ❤️

Hello. I am an at home daycare provider. I recently started care for a child who is just over one. Until now, mom and dad worked separate shifts, so they have not needed childcare. The child has always been held to sleep and has always slept on mom or dad.

If I put the child in a crib for naps, she screams. She will not stop screaming. If I pick her up, her eyes close, and she falls right asleep. Any time I move, she startles awake. Even moving my free arm, she will startle. I have tried to lay her in the crib half asleep and it is a no go. I have even tried fully asleep. She startles awake because she does not want put down. If I put her in there from the start, she screams.

I am wondering if there are any suggestions to help her learn to sleep, not in a person's arms during daycare, regardless of how she sleeps at home. Screaming wakes all of the other children up. Thank you!

I didn’t think this was going to be a thing until kindergarten, but it’s come up and I don’t know what to do. My twins are 18 months old. My son is very,  very rough with his sister. Daycare and us have been trying to redirect, praise when he’s gentle, model what we want to see, give other items that he can get that sensory seeking out on (such as other things to hit, bite, push), etc. No matter what we do, as soon as he sees his sister, it’s game over. He’s abandoning the alternatives to tackle her to the ground, hit, bite, etc. It seems to happen when he gets super excited and he’s just trying to play. At first, it was just her. Which isn’t okay, she deserves to not be getting jumped on, hit, bit, etc. But, she also has no issue shoving him off, telling him no, etc. If she gets a bite or a scratch, daycare knows we’re not going to flip, because we’re working on it at home as well.

Now, he’s starting to do it to the other kids. Again, just being playful, but he bit two kids a couple weeks back. A teacher basically had to be by his side at all times, which obviously isn’t practical in a 1:4 setting. It meant the other teacher was basically responsible for the other 7. Around this time, our daughter got sick and she stayed home. Daycare reported that the behaviors didn’t happen at all when she wasn’t there. He was still wild and chaotic (said with love), but he didn’t hurt anyone. They asked for permission to trial separating them into other classes for a week. We agreed. They moved our daughter as, again, our son seemed fine when it was her removed from the equation and everything else was the same. Full week, 0 incident reports. Our daughter is very chill and laid back so she also didn’t care about the transition, loved her new teachers and friends. The two rooms are the same age ranges, so it really wasn’t a huge change. At home, it’s still WWE, with us intervening. And again, easier for us to do because there’s 2 of us and just 2 of them. 

Yesterday, they were back in the same room and it was the same as before. He was hitting other kids, jumping on his sister, trying to bite (they caught him before he could). They told us they usually won’t separate multiples unless the parents ask but they think it may be worth doing permanently. I’m not entirely opposed, but I am worried about their bond. Unfortunately, due to our work schedules, our kids are there pretty much at opening and while we don’t shut the place down, they are there pretty late. So, if they’re not getting a lot of “awake time” together at this stage, will it impact their bond? The daycare says they’ll do whatever we’re comfortable with. I feel silly for being resistant. If this is what works, it’s what works. 

My husband had the idea of we do this for now and then when they’re ready to move up to the next age group (in about 10 months), we revisit and trial having them in the same class again. Maybe by then, our son will be out of this phase. I am leaning toward that, and the daycare is open.

I also tried to run the same experiment yesterday after I picked them up. My husband took our daughter somewhere, I took our son somewhere else. While he was still all over the place and being his usual crazy self, he wasn’t trying to hurt all the other kids. 

Will separating them temporarily for most of their waking hours have a big impact on their bond? Has anyone ever had twins separated this young?

my toddler is 24m. very much is still in the stage of “what happens if I do ______?”

this morning I dropped him off at daycare. a peer he didn’t know came and sat in front of him. im not sure if he thought she was going to take his toy, or was testing the interaction boundaries, but he put his hands at her neck and pushed her backwards.

his hands weren’t grabbing at her neck hard, but he placed them there for the push. when I picked him up, the daycare teacher said he did it twice more with other peers. not grabbing, but pushing with hands on necks.

while it wasn’t actual choking, it definitely freaked me out. my mind wants to say “well maybe that spot was just in his line of sight so thats where he pushed.” But just seeing him put his hands near someone’s neck freaked me out, especially multiple times.

He is in a “mine“ stage and is possessive with toys, so sometimes I will see him hit, but not often. I would definitely not describe him as an aggressive kid at all.

has anyone seen this in their toddler classes? I’m freaked.

I’ve been posting my experience the past few weeks at a daycare centre I’ve been working at for a month. I mentioned the director looking into my degree program in hopes to force me to demote myself and trying to intimidate me during a debrief meeting by threatening to fire me.

Over the weekend I decided I was just going to resign and had put in my notice on Friday night. I came into work yesterday expecting to be pulled aside immediately. However nothing happens and everything goes as normal until lunch time I go on my break and get called into the office. The assistant supervisor lets me know she received my letter and appreciates the notice, “but they will not be needing it”. She lets me know I can actually leave right now and I do not need to come in for the rest of the week. I return all my work material get my things and leave immediately.

As relived as I am to not have to return, I didn’t get a chance to thank and say goodbye to my coworkers who’ve been supportive and kind to me. I didn’t get to even tell my students goodbye. This happened during nap time so they would have woken up and not see me there. I didn’t even get to say bye to parents who’ve I’ve gotten to know and build relationships with. Just goes to show how terrible this centre really is and what I went through from beginning to end.

I'm new to working in a daycare. I work with infants for the first half of my day and then I'm rotated to the toddler room. I've been having no issues with the infants, but one of the toddlers has become a nightmare and their parents are not taking it seriously.

I have a 2 year old who punches, kicks, pushes, and bites. He's bit me twice within the past week and punched me in the face while I was having marker and chalk time yesterday. I was demonstrating what to do and all the other kids were just fine but he decided he wanted the exact piece of chalk I was holding and punched me. I didn't retaliate obviously and I took him to the take a break corner to sit and cool off with some water. After that, about 10 minutes later, he played just fine. And then he became tired. I asked if he was tired and he nodded. He looked tired. I lifted him to put him in the bed, and he started throwing a fit and bit me. I put him in the bed and called my boss. My boss said "Yes, thats how he acts. Just keep him in the bed. " like can we call his parents or something? Later that same day, he pushed a kid out of her chair because he wanted it.

I told my director and she said she'd tell the parents. His dad came in and we talked and he said "He don't do that to me. You gotta pop him" And left it at that. I obviously 1- Do not want to pop your child and 2- legally cannot pop your child. I've had parents tell me similar and suggest that I just pop the kid like they do at home. I don't understand. This kid has made it difficult to keep playtime peaceful. He hits anyone who even gets too close to a toy he wants or hits kids when he wants their toys. I stop of as often as I can because they all move so fast and I can't just not let him play. It's to the point where I've been considering another job, I'm not getting any help in this situation from the parent or my boss.

I''m dealing with a particularly frustrating situation trying to help my 2.5 year old and I'm wondering if anyone has any suggestions or has dealt with something similar and what helped. I am a first time parent but have previous experience nannying older children, working a summer camp with elementary school aged children, and as a RBT.

My toddler is 2.5 and has been in the same daycare since infancy. The daycare has never mentioned any concerns about development but we had a meeting with them to discuss behaviors like hitting and pushing peers a few months ago. We agreed to have him evaluated by EI, but he did not qualify. He was continuing to have the same struggles at school so we sought out a private evaluation with an OT who was able to work with him 1:1 and observe him at daycare. He is frequently hitting and impulsively pushing peers, and has more recently started with hitting teachers when redirected. He seems excited and hyped up when this is happening, so it seems sensory or an overstimultion thing. I am fearful that we will be asked to leave and my partner and I both work full time. I expressed my concerns with the situation to his pediatrician and she said she could refer us to get a developmental assessment. I feel like I'm trying to do all that I can to support him, but maybe this just isn't the right fit? I feel like the impulse control has gotten a lot better at home (he'll stay with me in public and won't run into a street, we were able to remove our baby gates, cabinet locks etc. because he leaves that stuff alone), but school has been a totally different story.

The tricky parts:

\-no professional we have seen feels he is delayed. His OT even admitted it would be easier to figure out how to "help" if he had a skill deficit. I had hoped as his language improved this would reduce, but no luck. He will literally says stuff like "mom, I saw a dragonfly outside on the blue truck. It was cool". He has also improved at asking for help, asking to play, and telling us things like when he needs space or that he is doing something safely.

\-we don't see this behavior at home nearly as frequently as it presents at school. He is fine with our pets, kids within our famly, and on play dates. We went to a playground yesterday and one of his classmates was there. They happily played together for like 40 minutes and there were no issues. He just cried for the other child when we had to leave.

\- He is very verbal and social. Regularly speaks in 5-6 word sentences, can follow directions, has little conversations, and is always asking questions. He'll go up to kids and ask them if they want to play with toys or play pretend like being dogs or something like that. The OT also noted that he was extremely social during her observation.

\- He definitely understands that hitting is not ok, it just seems like he can't control himself in the situation. I've seen another kid hit him unprompted and he immediately ran to tell the teacher what happened.

My 2.5-3 year old classroom is getting 8 new children next week and I’d love any tips or advice with how to mange having so many new children as they learn the routines and expectations in the room.

Link to the previous post

In short, my director and assistant director told me that starting next week that I'll have a home-base room! Not my original room but the one right next to it with a co-teacher I mesh well with and a lead teacher who I can get along with easily. I was given a choice of this (Room F) or another room where I work well with both the teachers (Room G); but I ultimately wanted Room F because as an added benefit is I'm familiar with the kids and their habits; and as an added bonus the kids like me.

One piece of advice I need is should I introduce myself to the parents of the kids explaining that I am going to be their regular teacher? My face and name is going to be at the front of the door and the parents are familiar with my face but I feel it'll be warranted so they at least know formally that I'm a face looking after their kid.

I have a five year old who can’t see well, lots of behavioral issues. Mom is a single mom who has three other kids with behavior issues.

This child doesn’t nap but wants to be under my desk for two hours while talking and disrupting everyone. Any ideas for a cozy nap area under my desk for this child? It really seems like they just want to be close. And I’m hoping if it’s comfy enough they will go to sleep

I am the assistant director at a CCDF certified unlicensed registered childcare ministry in the United States. We are not a licensed center, but still registered with the state. I’m wondering what other center’s (licensed or otherwise) policies are on meeting prospective families before the children actually start attending. We don’t have one, and I’m beginning to think it’s a recipe for disaster. Parents can enroll their children online, pay the deposit, and drop their children off the next day (or their children arrive on the bus after school, we do 3 years old through 5th grade). We have to approve the enrollment forms manually and call the parents to make sure we’re on the same page about their start date and all that jazz, and parents include on their enrollment forms that their children have special needs, such as autism, ADHD, emotional regulation issues, problems with sharing, and so on, but if the parent chooses not to come take a tour of the facility and meet the staff, we’re really just flying blind. We have a kindergartener this year with severe behaviors-for example, a staff member told him to come sit at the table and he hit her and started throwing tables and chairs around the room in response. I’m sure we could have been better prepared to meet his needs if we had had a meeting before he started and come up with strategies to help him be successful. I’m the assistant director and currently struggling with a lack of decision-making authority, but I am trying to prepare for when I do eventually take over and can get some solid policies into place for things like this. Do other centers require a meeting with the child and parent/s before they start attending? I also considered just requiring a meeting if the parent includes any behavioral concerns on the enrollment forms (because in my experience, they have always been upfront about it, although some sugarcoat the issues), but that leaves room for that one parent who inevitably has a severely high needs child and doesn’t mention it on the forms. I don’t intend to deny children admission based on these meetings, only to better prepare our staff to work with the child and meet their needs, and also to prepare the child and parent/s on the expectations we have for them while at our setting (discipline, suspension, and expulsion policies etc included). I would just like to hear how other daycares/preschools handle this, because I have never worked at any other center. Thanks for any advice!

I’ve been at my job for 11 years same place. Enrollment this year has declined and I don’t have any help I have 8 three year olds. I have a child in my class who runs out the classroom, screams and throws toys. I’ve helped him in so many ways along with parents sometimes it works sometimes not. I don’t want to leave just because of frustration from one child but if you left childcare because of burnout what did you do? ABA therapy, substitute? My degree is a BA in education.