Why is it only older guys that are into me?

I really wanna have a boyfriend but its weird for me to go up with the options I have. There was this guy who was 26 and I was 18 when he asked me out. Its happening with someone else again, he's 28 and I'm almost 20. I'm so exhausted.

Okayyy so I’ve been on here for so long but for the first time I actually feel the need to come on here and ask for some solid advice lmao. How in tf do you convince your boyfriend to get into therapy???

As in a dude who is clearly still hurt and angry from his childhood. A dude who will meet your mental health facts with annoyance as if you’re doing too much, a “know it all”, or tripping. One who still even see’s no wrong in many of the things in his past and even now.
It’s been 8 years and he still won’t talk to me but I can go on one of his social medias and see the saddest repost of how he feels deep down. It’s affecting our relationship, he’s affecting our relationship. We’re young yes but I know it’s no excuse especially as we’re getting older and going into adulthood.

I want you gals to give your best advice for something like this. I will take it all in and try to use it, and honestly I fear by this 8th year almost 9 if he doesn’t actually take the suggestion or I’m met with annoyance this time I think it’ll just be best for me to leave this go round. I haven’t hounded him much at all about therapy cause like I say he won’t tell me what’s wrong deep down. Like I said we’re young but we are also getting older and even this early I don’t want no more time wasted if it means I’ll have to deal with the same him years from now or even 2 really so give me what you got. Though I’ll also take your best suggestion if it’s to just leave after this time now lol.

And tell u about this awful experience

I had a friend for 2 years then we had feelings for each other but call him *s

S always made me safe special and happy

[Mind u] I never felt thag way before and he makes my heart flutter

But now at the same time hes the one who broke my heart

One day I was going out I check my snap he texted me

S* u need to know im seeing a girl

I shatterd

I cried nights

When I thought he was the one but for real

There's no one ever for me

All i see is dark and empty

Shout.out to u

I know its a bad move but I shout out to him on my private Snapchat he cant see it cuz he unadded me

I called him Mr piano man

Even hearing piano makes me mad crazy drives me nuts cuz he plays it

I always join his live stream support him

And I never have anything from anyone not even love

After this happening knowing he had a kid my mental health went down and might have bpd Maybe ill make a song for it

Have you ever done it? Did it improve your sex life?

So i don't know if it counts as girl talk but needed some kinda therapy

So basically in college i have a grp of 4. And mostly i always feel left out. One of the girls has a bf and a non chalant attitude so she doesn't hang out much which isnt a problem she's a good friend. The other two I feel like are a duo. Maybe they are not. You never know. But it's always so sad and lonely to be around them as they mostly talk within themselves, not like besties but some inside joke, or addressing something to each other and all. And I always feel left out and tell them this but they basically laugh it off saying I am overthinking. But the problem is I am way too clingy like I want my friends to be as clingy as I am. Not saying to not have another life but basically just want to give me some or the other update if needed and all. Even today I had some fight with one of the friends where she talked rudely to me a week back and i snapped at her because of thst reaction today so she was all upset and angry but I was the one who had to apologise because bascially "It was silly for me to get angry at that topic, its her nature to talk like that"

They are good friends but sometimes this shit happens and I hate it.

I’ve been chatting to a bloke for a while now – let’s call him (Y) – and I met him through a mutual friend (C). He’s a nice bloke and introduced me to (Y).

He’s a nice bloke, even though I don’t know him very well yet, but I’ve found out that (Y) is also friends with someone I know, whom I’ve had the misfortune of meeting (K). He’s a really nasty person… and I don’t know how to feel about it. (C) doesn’t like (K),

but (Y) is friends with him… I reckon that if you’re friends with someone like that… you’re a bit like that too.

Do you think so, or am I overthinking it?

Okay so basically I really like this guy and we have known eachother since 6th yr in secondary school right but we only started talking now.

For context I’m in uni and he’s also in uni and we just started talking recently but before all that it was kind off and on I would always sorta end the conversations but I knew he kinda liked me.

Anyways fast forward we’re proper talking now and we’ve gone out too twice. The second time we went out which was recent was when we went to watch a movie together and halfway through the damn movie it goes completely silent and MY STOMACH RUMBLES LIKE SUPER BADLY😭💔💔 felt so betrayed from myself but okay, I try play it off and look at him and he goes “it’s okay” but idkkkkkkk what if he was icked out yk😔

Afterwards we still hung out and went to get coffee and sat next to eachother and he put his arm around me and all. Hugged too when saying goodbye.

My concern now is we haven’t spoken for a bit meaning it’s been over 24hrs and he js liked my message and left me on seen. Obviously there was nothing more to the conversation but idk he hasn’t said anything yet and it’s been a while?

Am I crazy does he think I’m weird or js doesn’t wanna talk anymore 😭 idk please lmk what you queens think!!

I guess I’m looking for advice from people that have more experience than I do, for context I’ve never been in a relationship just situationships. I’ve been seeing this guy for about 2 months now. He lives over an hour away from me and drives to see me, we see eachother about once a week. Earlier into us talking I told him I’d like to hear from him at least once a day and he has stuck to that deal. But lately I’ve been noticing that he leaves me on delivered for an extended amount of time. This is fine as I often do the same when I’m away from my phone and we have both expressed that we aren’t on our phones much. What I’ve started to notice though, and this is the issue I’m having, is that he will still post online (instagram) and still won’t respond to me. Am I valid to be upset by this or am I just trying to sabotage this relationship? I haven’t brought this up yet because I really like him and I don’t want to mess this up, so if I’m being too much I’d really like to correct myself.

TLDR; Do I have the right to be upset that the guy I’m seeing will post online but leave me on delivered for hours?

So this guy i like told me he has a kid idk if I should say

Sucks to be them cuz I really wanna say it

I’m in 10th grade and I don’t really have friends, just one.. I don’t really participate in any school activities or events. I don’t want to regret anything that made high school great for you guys!

I do volunteer activities and I make a lot of friends in that and I have a lot of mentors in that and I get a lot of social time during that stuff!

Do you check your boyfriend's phone?

Do u tell your bf to stop talking to his female friends tho they are strictly just friends ?

If yes why

:/

My dad is a narcissist but is also struggling with a divorce. He grew up a certain way and I’ve done some research into the narcissist mind so I know that it’s a lot of battling with how you really feel and how you feel you should be so he genuinely doesn’t believe he’s wrong ever. I have sympathy for that. But all my life it’s lead to gaslighting, physical harm, and a lot of mental strain considering I was born with severe anxiety, ADHD, and OCD. I don’t usually talk about how my mental disorders come into play because I don’t want them to influence how people think of the story. Anyway, I’m leave for college soon and am not great with coordination like bumping into things, dropping things, and making in the minute decisions so today I cut some fruit but made a bit of a mess and dropped one on the floor and threw it into the woods behind my house. (I usually have anxiety when opening doors because I always get asked: “where are you going” and it leads to miles of questions from him) today was no different. I told him I dropped some fruit on the floor so I threw it into the woods. He said he could have eaten it then saw that I made a mess in the kitchen. He flipped out and when I told him I was in the middle of cleaning it up he said to just leave because I messed everything up. I told him I made a mistake and he said it wasn’t a mistake because I did damage there fore it was on purpose. He told me all I did was stress him out. I already have anxiety with combing into the kitchen to eat anyway out of fear I’ll have an altercation. I understand he has struggles right now but I’m tired of living like this all my life. I’m tired of always having to understand other people and consider their feelings but never mine. And it’s not like he comes to me to sit down and talk about it Lester and it gets resolved, I either have to go to him, or nothing happens. It’s always my fault somehow and I’m sick of it.

What should I put inside

So far I got

Scrunchies & hair clips

Hello all! I am 23F and I have a nexplanon implant, take citalopram, Accutane, and adderall. I am also sexually active with the same partner. We do not use condoms and we rely on my birth control and the pull out method (I know I know, but neither of us like condoms). I am not pregnant (I have to take a pregnancy test each month for my Accutane).

Recently, I’ve been noticing that I’ve been having 2-3 periods a month. I get no symptoms other than some bleeding. I’m confused on why this keeps happening and honestly, I’m annoyed.

Can anyone shed some light on this situation?

I recently realized that my right is a bit bigger than my left, so a cup size that fits well on one side doesn't do so well on the other. No matter what I find myself constantly having to adjust throughout the day. I can avoid the issue with sports bras and adhesive bras, but I don't just want to be stuck with only those options because there are so many cute options in other styles.

So does anyone here have some tips on finding good bras or making regular ones fit better?

I hate the phrase "it's not so bad on the first day" coming from someone who's period isn't heavy (mine is). Like shut the hell up please, specifically if the girl with a light period tries to take you somewhere like a amusement park or just hanging out as friends. It feels so dismissive,

She goes and gets her hair done.

His only observation, "dark."

She walks away.

Now he's upset because that was his way of showing "interest and starting a dialogue.

Please leave only unhinged responses that will match this lovely energy. Or, if anyone can help understand this perspective, that would be awesome.

I asked my husband today if he thought I was fat. He said “do you want me to lie to you or do you want the brutal truth?”
Not eating anymore sounds like a good idea now

Monday/ Tuesday my relationship ended. I don’t want to get into all of it since I would just be here forever but long story short I just couldn’t keep fixing our relationship it takes two and k wasn’t even met half way. I miss him so much. I love him so much and I just want to run to his arms and be hold by him and… I won’t fix it I can’t fix it this time but Im falling apart. My therapist said “what happens if he tries to contact you?” And the harsh truth is I know he wont and I think that adds to the hurt yk? Idk anyway I wrote this because my head is a mess and I know I shouldn’t contact him. Help

Yesterday, i went to a club for the first time in 5 years, i am on a trip to seoul with my friends and we thought it would be a good idea, at home i have my boyfriend of 3,5 years that i love so so much we’re super happy together and he’s genuinely the best guy i’ve ever met. he trusts me, allows me to go out anywhere and just tells me to be safe out there.

yesterday in the club, i was sober, and the club left me with a nasty feeling which im looking for people to relate to. most important think I DID NOT DO ANYTHING INAPPROPRIATE WITH ANY PTHER GUY. I had zero interest in flirting. guys would grab me, run against me and i would lose my shit and feel like i’m about to vomit, i would always move or push them away from me. yhe whole atmosphere in the club was just to get drunk and hook up with others, which threw me off. once i got back home and got to thinking i realised clubs aren’t my thing anymore at all, im not there to flirt or hook up, im there to have fun but its difficult for a girl to just have fun without being pursued. i’m wondering if any girls in a relationship also were left with a very disgusted feeling after the club, even whenknowing that they were 100% loyal to their boyfriend.

Hi everyone. This is going to be long, but I really need outside opinions because I genuinely don’t know if I’m making the biggest mistake of my life.
I’m 18F. My boyfriend (let’s call him Y) and I have been together for about a year.
Y is genuinely a good man. He’s kind, gentle, loyal, respectful and has always treated me well. He doesn’t follow lots of girls online, he constantly checks up on me, reassures me when I need it, and whenever we go out he almost always pays for everything despite me offering. Recently he’s been putting even more effort into the relationship because he could tell something was wrong.
The problem is… I don’t think I’m in love with him anymore.
This didn’t happen overnight.
For months I started feeling like our relationship became very quiet. We’d go on dates, eat together, and sometimes we’d barely have anything to talk about. Conversations felt awkward. I used to get excited to see him, but after many dates where he’d arrive late (sometimes around an hour late), I slowly stopped looking forward to seeing him.
I told him many times that being late hurt me because quality time is important to me. He apologized and started improving recently, but by then I think something inside me had already changed.
Then I met another guy.
Let’s call him X.
We started talking around two months ago after ending up in the same class. We became really close friends very quickly.
He’s almost the complete opposite personality-wise. He’s funny, playful, expressive and full of energy. We laugh all the time. Being around him makes my mind go quiet. We hug, joke around, tease each other, and I genuinely love spending time with him.
Eventually we both developed feelings.
At first I tried to ignore them because I had a boyfriend.
My boyfriend even told me he wasn’t comfortable with how close I was getting to X and asked me to keep some distance.
I didn’t.
Eventually I realized I had fallen in love with X.
The problem is… X also makes me incredibly anxious.
He’s more immature than Y. Sometimes he’ll disappear for hours, mention other girls casually, make jokes that make me jealous, or say immature things like wanting to buy a vape just to look cool.
I’ve cried more over X in two months than I ever cried over Y in one year.
But at the same time, when I’m actually with X in person, I feel incredibly happy. I love hugging him. I love how affectionate he is. He compliments me, makes me laugh and makes me feel desired in a way I haven’t felt in a long time.
I eventually broke up with Y because I realized my feelings had changed.
But after breaking up, I felt extremely guilty.
Y messaged me saying things like “this really hurts” and “I really wanted it to be you.”
I cried for days.
Then Y reached out again saying he didn’t want to lose me and wanted to work on things. He told me he’d help me get over my feelings for X if I was willing to stay together.
I was scared of losing such a good man.
So I got back together with him.
Now I’m back where I started.
I’m in a relationship with someone who treats me incredibly well…
…while my heart is somewhere else.
To make things even more complicated, X and I confessed our feelings to each other. I even wrote him long letters explaining how much I loved him and how conflicted I was.
His response showed he genuinely cared about me too.
But because I got back with Y, I told X we should remain friends because I didn’t want to lead him on while I was still in a relationship.
We haven’t really spoken since.
Now I feel guilty toward both of them.
I feel guilty because Y deserves someone who’s fully in love with him.
I feel guilty because X was honest about his feelings too.
I also feel guilty because recently Y bought me some things online, and now I almost feel like I “owe” him this relationship even though I know that’s probably not healthy.
Another thing I’m struggling with is that I don’t actually know if X would even be a good boyfriend.
Part of me thinks he’s just immature because we’re still young and that he’d be different in a relationship.
Another part of me worries that I’m idealizing him.
When I imagine my ideal partner, I honestly think:
“I want someone who makes me feel the way X makes me feel in person… but with Y’s maturity, consistency and emotional security.”
I don’t know if that person is Y.
I don’t know if it’s X.
Or maybe it’s neither.
I just know that staying with Y because I feel guilty doesn’t seem fair to him.
At the same time, leaving someone who genuinely loves me feels like I’m throwing away an amazing man.
So I guess my questions are:
• Am I making a huge mistake by wanting to end my relationship with Y?
• Am I confusing excitement for love?
• Is it possible that I simply fell out of love with a genuinely good partner?
• If you were in my position, what would you do?
Please be honest, even if it’s difficult to hear.

I haven’t watched tv for myself in a while. Husband is on a work trip and I need some recs. kids are asleep, fairy lights on, cup of tea brewing. Feminine/ romance a plus as that isn’t a preferred genre when agreeing on something with my husband and I usually read at night anyway. No reality tv please, thanks!

I've been battling with this for months and finally just want to vent about it so I can stop ruminating and move on. I know reddit will kick some sense into me. Sorry, its long.

I met a guy at the gym recently. It was one of those instant connections, we fell hard into each other almost immediately. Everything felt perfect in the beginning and we were talking and seeing each other almost everyday. When I met him I literally thought "this is my husband" it felt like, When you know you know, I never felt this before, surely this was it! Though I had these very deep feelings right away I tried to keep it to myself, I didn't want to scare this person away!

Things were going well for a month+ then I took an extended trip overseas for family, about 3 weeks. We kept in touch everyday still and even facetimed 1-2x a day. While i was away he got a new job in a field more aligned to what he wants to do. Though there was distance everything still felt connected. Until I finally got back everything took a turn. It started with him not wanting to see me right away as soon as I got back. Got back on a Saturday, said he couldn't see me until FRIDAY. red flag. I thought okay new job, longer hours, he's more tired. But then throughout the week he's texting less and less. I try not to make too much of it. We see each other finally and things are good but he just seems exhausted. I figure the new job and all, he's adjusting. But then it just keeps going on like this, just less and less communication, him not being able to meet up, postponing dates, Long silences etc. A normal person probably would just take this as he's no longer interested. But I am attached at this point.

Besides all this, he is actually what I believed to be a great guy. Total gentleman, very caring, respectful, thoughtful, sweet, hardworking, all the things. We have amazing chemistry when we are together but when we are a part it's like we became so disconnected all of a sudden. We just had 2 months of daily contact, surely he is just going through transition starting this new job. He has a 2nd weekend job and other side projects so he's working 7 days a week non stop so I am trying to give him grace. Well it goes on like this for weeks. I was trying to be patient and understanding, and I actually started a new job too so I'm busier myself, but then it's like 6+ weeks like this and throughout that time I saw him twice. It was to the point I just stopped telling him 'I miss him' because I felt like a broken record. He mostly just says he's really busy with work/projects and family, which he very much is and I do believe him. All the times we met I wanted to have more serious conversations but every time we meet he only has 1-2 hours so I kept putting off the hard things, because I just wanted to enjoy our time together. I never brought these things up on the phone because it never felt like the right time, and also felt like something I needed to talk about in person.

I realize things were fairly new with us, I did't want to pressure or put labels on anything or assume we are in a relationship. But I thought the first 2 months we had a very mutual connection. I thought we were much more than just dating. I actually thought we were in a relationship. I mean it felt like it just progressed into that, neither of us were seeing other people, and we were talking nearly everyday. We never had the "what are we" talk, or ever discussed making things official but I didn't think we needed to. I guess I thought it was just mutual. It still felt early, but at this point I needed to stop the dance because my anxiety was killing me. I finally let him know we need to talk about what's going on here because I need clarity. At this point we are around the 4 month mark. Well we finally meet up for this talk and he tells me he can't be in a relationship. I mean I had prepared for this with how things have been going but I guess I was being optimistic going into the discussion and I just really hoped it would be something else going on with him. He does have mental health stuff going on (depression and other things) and a lot going on with his family and work right now. He lives at home to help with a grandparent living with them in hospice. He is working towards going independent/starting a business and he has a lot of side work. But yeah, he basically said he can't be what I want him to be. I deserve better. Someone devoted. And he's right, I want all of that and I felt like I got a taste of that in the month before my trip so I know it was in him. I try to tell him I don't need him to be perfect and it's okay if he doesn't have all his shit together right now. But he says he has so much of life to figure out and he just doesn't have capacity for a relationship. I understand, I don't beg or push. It super sucks but hey I respect it.

The thing I am struggling with though is we never stopped talking after this. The very next day he still texts and calls me. Actually he begins to call and text me MORE. I am delulu so I'm thinking, my husband was just confused! (obviously the husband ship has sailed, I just joke to cope) But I don't assume we are back on, I'm just patient, no expectations. Thing are seemingly good, I even saw him more times in the last two weeks than I have the whole 2 months prior. I think okay we are not in a relationship but maybe we just shifted into some fwb situation but I will say 'benefits' lightly because we actually barely have sex! Like not even once a month. Then a couple weeks goes by and I see him again, and the chemistry and attraction is still there, undeniable. We have a good talk about all sorts of things, and it comes up in conversation that his ex tried to friendzone him after breaking up, she thought they could just be friends and he thought absolutely not. So I asked him, are we friends? He said, "we are not friends" meaning we are more than friends..ahh glimmers of hope for my delulu anxious attached ass. I am delighted. I think okay, maybe we are back on? couple days goes by and it still feels like the dance so I start getting my clarity sooner than later this time. I ask him what he means by 'we are not friends.' He says.. it means we are dating. huh. I see. ok. he says he is still not ready for a relationship. I tell him honestly I envisioned we would be in a long term relationship eventually.

So I am a bit slow at processing so it's not until the next day or two I ask him what are his goals for dating? He says he has so much to worry about with his career and life that he can't even think of a goal for dating. he says he has no goal for dating. I don't question too much more, I'm honestly just pretty crushed. he says he knows it's not fair to me, now that he knows I have goals of a serious relationship and he doesn't. I'm feeling foolish now that he led me on all this time and he is "just now" finding out I have goals for a relationship, I thought it was obvious. sure we never explicitly talked about a relationship before but it felt clear as day to me. I don't really question or say much back i don't really know what to say, I am not good with expressing myself on the spot. We end the call a bit after that. This was about a week ago now. He still checks in with me and calls me everyday. lol. wtf.

I truly do not think he is seeing other people, I really believe he is going through a lot at home and he is working a lot and also trying to go independent/build a business. He struggles with depression/mental health so I have really been trying to be understanding and patient, a caring friend. But I freakin fell in love and I can't unlove.

I am realizing this isn't healthy for me and I don't know if I can just date him with no end in sight, especially after I thought (or it felt like) we were already in a relationship now to go backwards to just dating?! I'm really conflicted. The whole thing ended before it really began. Clearly he says he can't be in a relationship yet he wants to reach for me like a girlfriend. ugh. I'm sad, mad, annoyed, embarrassed, heartbroken, yet I still really care about him. I guess I just need to vent because this has just been consuming me and I'm starting my period and I'm going a little crazy. I have a big work week coming up and I just need to get this off my chest.

Feeling really meh about myself lately and could honestly do with some words of support.

I moved house recently, a bit further out from town, and although there’s nothing particularly wrong with it, I think I’m really missing my old life and my old self. I feel like I’ve lost a bit of myself along the way.

I’ve gained at least 5kg, my relationship with food hasn’t been great, I’ve had basically zero discipline with exercise and I just don’t feel good in myself at the moment. I’ve also had some health issues over the last few years, so I think part of me is grieving who I was about 4 years ago. I used to feel fitter, more confident and just generally happier in myself.

I’m 35 and single, and most of my friends are either further away now or busy with their own families, which can feel quite lonely. I don’t even really have the confidence to speak to guys at the moment, never mind actually date

I know I’m probably being harder on myself than I should be, and I know 35 isn’t old, but I’m just struggling to see how I get back to feeling like me again.

Has anyone else gone through a period where they’ve felt like they’ve lost themselves a bit? Did you manage to get yourself back? I could really do with hearing some positive stories or just some reassurance that things can change.