Problem with effort

[u/SeaSir1085]

Hello, I’m 20 y/o, nearing 21, and I have a pretty big problem I’m not sure how to solve. I was just about never a star student in school, not because I couldn’t understand or anything, but I always did the bare minimum. Stuff just kinda came natural, and I didn’t need to study or anything like that. I had a year of college and dropped out because I just couldn’t keep up. I feel like I can’t put much effort into things I don’t directly/immediately care about. It’s destroying my life, and I’m just trying to fix it and move forward. Obviously it would be good to chase some sort of career or field I care about, but it hasn’t been that simple. There are things I sort of cared about, but I couldn’t bring myself to do the hard parts I didn’t want to do. It’s like there’s this invisible wall in my brain that keeps me from doing so. I don’t like that phrasing because it completely detaches me from the result, but it sure does feel that way. This even extends to the most basic things, like laundry or self maintenance sometimes. It’s like I’ve been in some sort of “decay” mode where I just waste away. It’s like my mind is screaming to do something and my body doesn’t follow suit. Sorry for the yap, just had to get it off my chest somewhere. I’ve told people about this, but essentially people just tell me to “try harder”. That very well could be it. If it is though, what is the threshold? I feel like I would have reached it by 20 years of living and dealing with this. idk please help I’m big lazy

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