r/Parenting • u/dontletmedown3 • 13h ago
School New school?
We joined an outdoor private school and today was the first day. I was informed the other kids were hitting my child with sticks and just being really mean to him. It’s a small class with three teachers and I’m sad this happened because we picked this private school because we believe in the nature inspired educational thing. Our son spends all his time outdoors or playing indoors so we figured an outdoor nature school would be awesome. But it sounds like at one point the kids were hot and tired and all decided to take it out on mine?
Even hitting him with sticks. My son said they were saying bad things to him, hitting him, tripping him, even throwing water on him. He had to change his clothes after and then they just poured more dirty water on him. And when I picked him up he said he had been in his dirty wet uncomfortable clothes for hours and nobody cared. He said he was alone a lot and they did nothing all day except play and he was so bored actually.
Thinking of just putting him in public school now because this was awful
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u/ilovecookiesssssssss 13h ago
Ya I mean.. this would be a dealbreaker for me. My son has been in public school for 10 years now, and he’s never been beaten with sticks or any other items. It’s been relatively stress free in terms of issues with other students.
I wouldn’t feel comfortable sending him back knowing that the teachers are clearly incapable of keeping him safe.
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u/dontletmedown3 13h ago edited 13h ago
Yea I’d rather he just go to public school because this is sad af.
His safety is so important to me and we didn’t want him doing gun shooter drills but idc I will not have him abused by others children4
u/Grrarrgghh 11h ago
Private schools should also be doing active shooter drills. Sounds like you got taken in by pretty stuff over substance.
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u/dontletmedown3 10h ago
Yea I guess that’s what it was. I was a little hesitant but figured he would thrive in a familiar environment.
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u/RunStitchRepeat 13h ago
What did the teachers say/do about this?
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u/dontletmedown3 13h ago
The teacher did not reach out at all. The main teacher just said hi to me when I picked him up. The teachers helper told me
My son had the perfect day and ate his lunch and then the other extra helper lady/volunteer was the one who even decided to tell me. She said she felt she needed to say something because my boy is so kind and they were really cruel. She said they stopped the boys the first time and had a “talking to” them. But then it just continued on after.4
u/RunStitchRepeat 12h ago
I would reach out to the main teacher and ask what their plan is to fix this
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u/dontletmedown3 12h ago
Don’t see the point when we won’t be going back
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u/RunStitchRepeat 11h ago
You are going to take your kid out of a school when you haven't even spoken to the teacher about the issue? Wild.
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u/mechanical_stars 7h ago
It'd be more wild to send him back to a place where his peers not only act that way, but the adults in charge allow them to act that way. It's clearly a terrible environment, OP is right to leave and not subject their child to that.
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u/dontletmedown3 10h ago edited 9h ago
Well, when my son told me those kids hurt him, I told him let’s go tell your teacher. So we go up to her and she tells him to tell her next time! The person that messaged me said they actually intervened and pulled the bullies aside to speak with. So the teacher actually didn’t say a word about it to me and both she and the teachers aide just acted like it was a great day and the best day ever for him.
So in other words shouldn’t the teacher have not acted surprised when my son shyly said they hurt him? I guess that’s why my son didn’t really want to tell her. He knew she already talked to the boys once and nothing happened. He normally has no issue sharing his feelings and whatnot but he didn’t even want to talk to her.
She acted like she had no clue. I think she didn’t like my kid tbh.
Also, not that it matters but, Her child was really annoying and in diapers and it weirded me out she was teaching her annoying ass child with the rest of the kids. I am super upset the teacher and main teacher aid never reached out and I would have not known about everything else besides what my son shared. I feel like a teacher would normally let a parent know that their child was hit repeatedly with sticks, made fun of, isolated and hazed, etc•
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u/eyesRus 12h ago
They stopped them, and then the boys started doing it again? This is very concerning. Why weren’t the sticks taken away? What is the ratio? What are their disciplinary policies?
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u/dontletmedown3 12h ago
My exact thought. There was zero reason for it to start up again after they were spoken to. Suppose to be three adults to like 15 kids maybe? I’m not sure why it would have continued. My son was visibly upset when I arrived. He made it a point to ask me to come over to where he is and then he pointed out two of the children that hurt him. That’s what he was excited to show me. I’m very sad
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u/littlemicetamer 8h ago
How you handle this is what your son is going to remember. I would talk to him and come up with a plan together. Personally, I wouldn't want him to go back, but he might feel lime he wants/needs to confront his bullies or teachers.
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u/dontletmedown3 1h ago
I was calm and collected. I won’t let him go back. He wants to but I don’t trust the people there now
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u/howtheturntables07 13h ago
Oh hell no, I’d take my kid out. I’m surprised the teachers didn’t reach out to you, as a teacher myself.