r/ProgrammerHumor 3d ago

Meme doUwantAWebsite

Post image
5.5k Upvotes

72 comments sorted by

327

u/fpcoffee 3d ago

exactly how I feel at work every day 🙃

395

u/animeshnbe 3d ago

Imagine real time kill stats presented with parallax and gradient effects

74

u/LightofAngels 3d ago

That would be lovely, and then you can have a kill cam/ footage to verify every kill.

Store the video in s3, after the drone/missile’s link upload it.

12

u/UncleKeyPax 2d ago

guys stop teaching ai how to make murder porn for itself and store it cheaply

6

u/ilovevue 2d ago

I mean Ukraine has a webshop where you can buy perks and weapons with killstreaks

3

u/NeuxSaed 2d ago

I'm Discord friends with a dude in Ukraine that does Rust and C++ stuff.

He has a giant battery bank at home for when the power goes out.

2

u/imkmz 1d ago

I've got a colleague from Ukraine. He started building his solar farm back in late 2022, and now it's 150 kW, plus a huge underground battery bank.

408

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

83

u/throwawaycanadian2 3d ago

It says I should drink water.

46

u/RobertAleks2990 3d ago

But it used the water to tell it!

7

u/xboxcowboy 3d ago

AI needs to stay hydrated too

7

u/spikernum1 3d ago

Need a website?

7

u/jayerp 3d ago

What starting nuclear war taught me about B2B sales.

127

u/Fickle-Highway1543 3d ago

PleaseHackMyConscriptionPapers

38

u/BenjieWheeler 3d ago

People: nah we already got Squarespace, today's spons...

54

u/HooAreYouWhoHoo 3d ago

Better to be a web dev than making killer robots. Theres not enough money to keep those demons at bay.

14

u/ArinArcana 3d ago

Amen. I don’t need or want war/genocide money, I just wanna do what I love which is write code and make good looking and functional websites and CLI tools to automate things.

159

u/Ripolak 3d ago

If you're willing to put politics aside, here in Israel, on the last war with Iran, there was a vibe coded app that went viral that calculated when was the best time to go take a shower in your city (based on rates of previous rocket sirens in the area). So yeah I can confirm it's a thing

35

u/Dotcaprachiappa 3d ago

...did it work?

140

u/einzweidreihorn 3d ago

100% based on the people able to leave a review

18

u/CrazyITOne 3d ago

Oh my... 😂

9

u/Dotcaprachiappa 3d ago

I'm convinced

6

u/bkbenken123 3d ago

Woah 100% is so good

8

u/2eanimation 3d ago

Think out of the box. Design a porn website targeted at your enemy, use AI to feed them their deepest desire, win because they‘re too distracted with gooning.

8

u/dull_bananas 3d ago

/uj this post is how i found out about world war 3

27

u/spinz89 3d ago

So tired of hearing about WW3. People have been saying it's coming for the past 10 years now.

30

u/OkFineIllUseTheApp 3d ago

I decided to check when the first prediction of WWIII was.

November 3rd, 1941 had a guy predicting it to be soon.

We weren't even done with the second one 💀

4

u/DracoLunaris 3d ago

To be fair to that guy, unlike everyone else he didn't know about nuclear bombs and MAD.

2

u/tr0nPlayer 3d ago

Bit of a "conspiracy" theory even though it's not really a conspiracy, it's claimed that people dreamt of WW1 before it occured:

https://espirited.com/en/jung-visions-and-dreams-before-the-outbreak-of-the-first-world-war/

6

u/Western-Internal-751 2d ago

The thing is, WW1 was basically unavoidable. There was so much tension between countries that the assassination of an Austrian ruler by a Serb nobody resulted in Germany attacking France a month later.

I think it’s not that outlandish that people were getting dreams/nightmares of a big conflict back then.

2

u/2eanimation 2d ago

Yeah, things are chill right now.

Venezuela, Iran, Ukraine, Kuril Islands(Russia-Japan conflict), Germany/EU-countries thinking about more nuclear weapons, a lot of shady stuff with China(observe their fishing industry in international waters, or where they shovel sand) including eg Taiwan. And then, global warming, with the real possibility of millions of people losing their homes and no access to fresh water.

I‘m not a WWIII dreamer, but I wouldn’t exactly portray our situation as tension-less. What do you think would people have dreamt of in 1913 if they‘d got as many horrible news as we could theoretically read(as in, if you want to go nuts) right now, pretty much every day?

1

u/Biliunas 2d ago

Well, they didn't have nuclear weapons back then for one. Also, war was sort of viewed as the ultimate glory as it was mostly low casualties compared to the absolute hell unleashed by WW1 and WW2.

9

u/Britkraut 3d ago

They keep remaking the Cold War over and over again I'm surprised Todd hasn't sued for his schtick yet

Where's our new Fallout guys

17

u/pleaserestartsystem 3d ago

it cant get here fast enough for this guy.

13

u/Dotcaprachiappa 3d ago

Probably cause for the past 10 years one (1) stupid move from anyone of a handful of people who have done plenty of stupid moves already would throw us straight into WW3..

10

u/LactasePHydrolase 3d ago

10 years? This has been true since September 2nd 1945

3

u/mbcarbone 2d ago

I’m not trying to be sassy, but … Hasn’t the world been at war for a while now? We’re just a different world now then we were in 1941.

-1

u/JebKermansBooster 3d ago

Orange man still has two years and change to start it

2

u/shiny_glitter_demon 2d ago

Optimistic considering his health

1

u/JebKermansBooster 2d ago

Pessimistic*. Optimistic would be him exiting stage left immediately.

-4

u/dadnothere 3d ago

There is no such thing as "arriving" as a fact. It's something that rarely happens...

Furthermore, today the US and Israel kill more people per year than Germany killed per year... But they still don't call it "World War"

So... what are you waiting for? Let the UN be who it says?

Consistency please.

4

u/SHOTbyGUN 3d ago

I was worried I was on NCD

4

u/Skeleton590 3d ago

"finally"?

7

u/oompaloompa465 3d ago

jesus christ this one made me feel like i wanted to cry and laugh at the same time...

in fetal position 

5

u/renome 3d ago

Just do it, it makes you feel better sometimes.

3

u/Coulomb111 3d ago

now THIS is an r/ProgrammerHumor shitpost

3

u/reuben_iv 3d ago edited 2d ago

lol literally during covid

3

u/chickey23 3d ago

Look at Ukraine. People are going to want websites. They are going to need techno backing tracks.

5

u/Snackatttack 3d ago

this meme is very 2010 i like it

2

u/FesteringDoubt 3d ago

How else are people meant to register their kills so they can get a UAV?

2

u/WhosYoPokeDaddy 3d ago

"can you hurry up and approve claude's latest PR so we can push the updated targeting algorithm?"

2

u/backstubb 3d ago

with AI in it?

2

u/Anarye 2d ago

You jest, but in a way, life must continue.

My company works with a vendors based out of ukraine and israel.

During a call with the israeli account management team, they had to sign off because of iranin missiles inbound. We heard the air warnings in the back ground before they signed off.

Ukrainian vendor had a dev on staff we routinely spoke with, he still continues to work as a developer.

3

u/4sent4 3d ago

It's "Les programmers", you use "les" for plural

1

u/doomscroller6000 3d ago

Someone has to program the kill leaderboard for your respective country...

2

u/JebKermansBooster 3d ago

And dole out killstreak rewards as appropriate, obviously (fun fact, Ukraine is actually kind of doing this at the unit level, giving more effective units better tech and more money).

1

u/doomscroller6000 2d ago

Exactly that's what I am referencing, crazy what they came up with, they also now have an Wikipedia for Russian Weapon systems where they reverse engineer them and give partnered weapons manufacturers access to it to know about weaknesses that they should exploit

2

u/JebKermansBooster 2d ago

Damn my bad for not getting we were referencing the same thing 🙃

It's wild though how quickly the meta of warfare is shifting from aircraft carriers, heavy bombers, and fighters to UAVs, drones, and soon humanoid robots if the PLA are to be believed.

1

u/Tu-Bi 3d ago

I create a website so you can track and watch ww3

1

u/violet_v3lvet 3d ago

If Fallout 4 showed me anything is that someone has to work maintenance so Raiders can write in their computer diaries.

1

u/seedless0 3d ago

ww3ishere.com is still available.

https://www.whois.com/whois/ww3ishere.com

1

u/Open-Trifle-6309 3d ago

Do you want a potato ?

Or some.cum

1

u/tonyromero 3d ago

Hello boss do you need a websitah?? I'm a website buildah

1

u/NekoBatrick 2d ago

What do you mean "finally"

1

u/ZaesFgr 1d ago

you need drone operators and local programmers who'll produce solutions temporary solutions. I think programmers is needed as much as technical stuff

1

u/TheKingOfTCGames 3d ago

How do you want your drone mesh autotmated?

1

u/-xmaek- 3d ago

*les