r/Retire • u/Odd_Bodkin • 1d ago
Declining to replace items when they break
A while back, my nice set of Bose noise-canceling headphones broke, and I have no other over-the-ear headphones. I considered buying a new pair and then decided, nope, I’m simplifying, I have my AirPods, and I can do fine with just them. Yesterday, a friend gifted me a Kindle ebook, and I charged my Kindle and discovered that it has fallen out of support and won’t let me download books to it. But I have an iPad with the Kindle app and can read the ebook that way, so I think I’ve settled on not replacing the Kindle device either. So some niceties I enjoyed for years and years, I’m starting to live without, for the sake of simplification and getting rid of stuff opportunistically.
Are you finding yourself doing this? What kinds of belongings/gadgets/toys/luxuries have you quietly abandoned? What did it feel like to do that? Any regrets?
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u/KingFattie 1d ago
I'm buying stuff I've wanted but put off. I'm in the if not now then never phase. So what if the cozy new robe or beautiful replacement for the old, stinky recliner outlast me. At least I enjoyed them. So if it breaks, is outdated or no longer brings me joy then I replace it with something better, usually whatever I've denied myself previously.
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u/MarisWinter 1d ago
I love that SOOOOOOOO much. Came from a super poor family. 76 now and my sweetie of 41 years came from the same kind of family. We have worked like maniacs and now…..I replace anything that ‘I’ would walk in my house and possibly feel is sadly old smelly or just OLD. I do this for me. I do this with great pleasure. The spot of joy feels visceral. I know this is just me, but it is. I have bought lovely nightgowns, kind of in a super weird way, to honor my parents. They had next to nothing,, but at Christmas every three or so years my Dad would go to Penny’s and buy my mom a nightgown. I remember puzzling over this as a 10 year old. Some of my clothes, not that I have vast amounts of them, will far, far outlast me. I don’t care. I just love how we are each so different and I honor the variety of us. To Life!
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u/Local_Whereas7211 1d ago
Doing sort of the same thing. When stuff wears out or breaks, I'll replace if needed but go up to premium quality. Sheets worn out, get a high thread count for the replacement. Markings on the plastic measuring cups worn off, get nice metal ones. Small pleasures.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Someone asked me what I’d do if I ever won a 9 digit lottery (neat trick if you don’t play). My answer was to throw out everything and start again, buying two chairs but NICE chairs, one table but a NICE table, six plates but NICE plates…..
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Thanks for the Spend It All Now! perspective. I’m sure the years of self-denial have built up a healthy appetite for deny-nothing.
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u/Empty_Store_3721 1d ago
You forgot the Porsche 911
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u/KingFattie 1d ago
I had a 944 when I was younger. Now I'm looking for something I can just get out of without throwing out my knee. Maybe a rocking chair is better for me now.
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u/Rick-20121 1d ago
You nailed it. By the time I could afford a Corvette convertible, I no longer had hair to flutter in the breeze and it would have taken a crane to get me out. I doubt I could keep up with a 20-something blonde either. My yacht has sailed. Without me!
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u/zezer94118 1d ago
I've done the same when my wife divorced me. I don't need a new one really, so I'm sitting home single, without a replacement. Life is good.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
So would you classify that as something misplaced, something broken, or something you just gave away because it’s doing you no good?
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u/InterestinglyLucky 1d ago
In my last 2 years of full time work, I bought a pair of Bose QC headphones and enjoyed them a lot. Then the first one broke and got it replaced under warranty. (Problem with the wired connection, it was weird.) And in about 9 months, had to replace it again, a similar strange problem with inability to connect.
The third unit broke and it wasn’t like I abused them either! No sound. Didn’t bother trying to get it replaced under warranty. Too much trouble.
Rocking a Bowers and Wilkins S7 and love it for travel.
Not downsizing, just my Bose story.
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u/RootaBagel 1d ago
Many things I bought were either for work in some way (e.g.: noise canceling headphones for business trips), or provided some relief from work stress in some way. Some things were just to keep up with everybody else. I no longer feel the need to have the latest TV or computer anymore, and I get along fine with my obsolete stuff.
Like someone said, about most the stuff: it's stuff you don't need, bought with money you don't have, to impress people you don't know.
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u/NoKetoCardio 1d ago
No. The opposite.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Say more. You’re indulging in extravagances you didn’t before? Like what?
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u/NoKetoCardio 1d ago
Lexus GX 460. Pre owned but like new condition. New set of golf clubs I didn’t need but are great. Clothing I didn’t need. Second pairs of tennis shoes and casual dress shoes. Air pods. 85” tv. New iPhone I didn’t really need. But it’s nice. I lived a very frugal life up until retirement. Only bought what I needed. I can’t think of anything else to buy. Ha.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
And so tell me candidly. You’re buying things you don’t need. What does that action feed in you? You’re doing it for a reason. What’s the reason? Why is it important to you?
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u/NoKetoCardio 1d ago
😂 Please
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
No, I’m serious. Illuminate me. Why are you enjoying doing this? (Not everyone does, don’t assume it’s a given.)
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u/NoKetoCardio 1d ago
You indulged early. I’m indulging late. Your question is more appropriate for a psychotherapy subreddit. I’m not your guy. I already know who i am.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
I’m not trying to fix you, believe me. I’m trying to understand. Your answer implies that indulgence is something people do for its own sake, to feel good, whether you do it earlier or you do it later. That’s not even close to being universal. I’m not asking you to defend it. Just explain it.
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u/NoKetoCardio 1d ago
Hard to take you seriously. Seriously. The tv is larger. Is better for watching golf. Make sense?
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Not completely, no. For example, if golf was hard for you to watch with your old TV and the new TV resolves that PROBLEM, then I can see the case being made for it. But it isn’t true that More is More in general. For example, if you buy clothes you don’t need and as a result there are clothes in your closet that you find you haven’t worn in a year, then you’ve spent money and space on something you don’t use, so there a net cost with no return on value. That doesn’t mean that people don’t go ahead and buy the clothes, but they do it for the reason that the acquisition moment is the thrill. It’s called retail therapy, and it’s the spending the money that is the thing they enjoy, perhaps after years of telling themselves they don’t have the money. For some people, it’s about “I have money now, I might as well use it, what can I spend it on?” And it honestly doesn’t MATTER what it’s spent on because it’s the spending that’s the satisfying aspect. Which is fine, by the way. Is that you?
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u/According_Ad_1960 1d ago
I definitely love keeping things simple and not buying things I don’t need - that said, if I have an item I love (like my Bose ear buds) I am going to replace it with the same or nicer model. I’m not trying to be the richest person in the cemetery and that’s what the pile of money is for.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
The pile of money is invisible to me. It supports my lifestyle. I don’t think about increasing the balance, I don’t think about spending it down. It’s like air to me, and I don’t think about air while breathing, I just breathe.
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u/Whatatay 1d ago
I used to love seeing and buying new tools. I used some tools in my job. Now that I am retired I don't know how much time I have left so won't buy any more and will get rid of most of the ones I have.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Yes, I went on a tool purge a few months ago. Got rid of all duplicates and about 50% of the non duplicates also. The tool wall in the garage looks a lot more manageable.
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u/MarisWinter 1d ago
Yes, the research shows those of us who have done well by consistently…….saving, have difficulty spending. What made us get to a comfy place, those habits, are hard to break.
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u/guyghostforget 1d ago
Get some new headphones. Treat yo self
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u/Odd_Bodkin 1d ago
Funny thing is, I think I am by not. I have in-ear noise-canceling buds. I don’t need more. More means more clutter, a place to store them, having to keep them charged, having to PAY ATTENTION to them. I’m finding more joy in the cleanliness.
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u/miguelmaio 1d ago
Minimalism (light). Welcome on board and have fun! :)
Everything I don't need and/or use, I sell or simply avoid buy.