at some point i wanted to defend myself i wanted to go and tell this is not what happened this is what happened i wanted to go to him and ask what bad did i do so much he is disrecpecting me doing all this i wanted to hit him hug him and tell him please stop its hurting me i need you im tired i cant take anymore but i didnt do any of it not because i couldnt but morelike i felt like if i stayed with him i will lose myself and im disrespecting myself but what about the days when he healed me loved me adored me what about the days i felt love seen and i loved love again but again i didnt do any of it i moved on i cried everyday while praying and i kept saying i gotta move on with my life i need to get myself together so is love worth it will i ever love love again for now i would say no for the future?i would say no too because he was my last hope now my room isnt fill with sunlight its filled with darkness there is so much in life but love isnt for me i have to stop being dramatic and get myself together for me for my parents.will this ever end?will i ever find myself again?so is love worth it ?