r/Wellthatsucks • u/Gokul_Vivek • 15h ago
Behold: The absolute unit of a nose hair vs. my actual scalp hair. Genetics are a cruel joke.
I spent a solid ten minutes staring at this today. The thick, dark, structural steel rebar you see on top? That’s from my nose. The pathetic, translucent strand of spider silk underneath? That’s from the top of my head.
I actually looked up the science behind this because I felt personally attacked by my own biology. Turns out, nose hairs are genetically built to be "coarse air filters," so they grow a massive, rigid inner core to trap dust. Meanwhile, scalp hair is just meant to be "flexible insulation."
But the absolute worst part? The same hormone (DHT) that makes your head hair shrink, thin out, and eventually pack its bags and leave, is the EXACT SAME HORMONE that tells your nose, ear, and back hair to mutate into indestructible wire brushes as you get older.
So no, my head hair will never be as thick and luscious as my nose hair. My nostrils are out here building a maximum-security fortress, while my scalp is slowly giving up on life.
TL;DR: If anyone needs me, I'll be looking into scalp transplants using nose hair donors.
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u/Greedy_Scientist7334 15h ago
Nose hair looking like a spiders leg 😭
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u/CHiZZoPs1 14h ago
Those monster hairs only increase and get worse as you age.
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u/ChampionshipHot5468 14h ago
Yep. The other day, my one eyebrow looked thick and just not right. So I found my strong reading glasses and limped back to the bathroom. Fucking arthritis in left foot. So a pube-tier white hair, about an inch long, was growing sideways underneath the rest, pushing and fluffing up the whole vibe.
Grabbed it with tweezers and it touched my nose when pulled down. Once done, the glasses showed me my nose and ears. 3 days and it's a mess again. My beard now covers my neck and shoulders. It's fully integrated with my chest hair.
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u/uglyzombie 15h ago
Dude, thank you for this post. Without going into detail, I’ve had a really hard day. This post made me belly laugh, and hopefully not at your expense.
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u/Gokul_Vivek 15h ago
Please, laugh at my expense! My scalp already gave up🫡, so it might as well boost your morale today😌
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u/Sorkpappan 14h ago
How long is your nose, mate?
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u/Gokul_Vivek 14h ago
Deep enough that I felt like I was unplugging this thing directly from my brain cortex 🤫🫣
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u/ParadoxicallySweet 12h ago
“I'll be looking into scalp transplants using nose hair donors.”
This is the sentence I didn’t know I needed to read today.
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u/Normal-Selection1537 14h ago
My hair is gradually getting gray and now I have a couple gray nose hairs and those fuckers grow so much faster than the rest.
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u/Junior_Presence21 15h ago
Nature really said “protect the nostrils at all costs” and sacrificed the scalp. 😂
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u/phil_davis 10h ago
Most peoples' nose hairs are to protect from things like dust. This guy's nose hairs are to protect against Mongolian invaders.
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u/CivilResist1417 11h ago
Your nostrils are producing industrial grade materials while your scalp is using biodegradable fishing line 😭
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u/JimmerUK 14h ago
This is the stage I’m at.
My main battle is that my nose hair grows so fast, it’s a never ending challenge to keep it trimmed so that it doesn’t merge with my moustache hair.
It tangles in the night and wakes me up!
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u/myrsnipe 14h ago
Goddamn I started laughing reading that tldr on the bus but semi contained it so it was only snorting sounds instead and everyone started looking at me
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u/Junior_Presence21 15h ago
Bro has a nose hair with better structural integrity than his entire head of hair 😭
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u/Resident_Course_3342 15h ago
Can they transplant your nose hairs to your scalp?
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u/OkPerformance66 13h ago
Dude would look like a toilet brush
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u/mr_lab_rat 2h ago
Ok, I struggled not to spit my coffee when reading the OP. Now I have a full on giggle attack 😆
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u/ChampionshipHot5468 14h ago
I think they only thrive in snot, like ear hair in wax.
Maybe a snot/ear wax mask for your scalp could work.
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u/Patient-Doughnut7266 14h ago
I was having a rough day and this made me chuckle. I feel your pain on the 1800's haunted ghost baby hair that inhabits the top of my head.
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u/throwawaymikenolan 14h ago
Here is another sign that I will be losing my thick hair soon
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u/Gokul_Vivek 14h ago
Welcome to the club! Pluck one of your new nose wires as a ceremonial initiation 🤥
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u/The_Only_Egg 7h ago
I’m mid 40’s and it’s a constant battle with those fucks. Do you ever get the weird crimped body hairs? Or one that grows insanely fast? Man getting old is the pits.
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u/jennifercathrin 11h ago
I have PCOS. My chin hair is thicker than the hair on my head. Genetics can fuck themselves.
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u/Inside-Example-7010 9h ago
the feeling of pulling a nose hair out of the root from the back of your head feels orgasmic.
that little snap sound. Omg.
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u/Forward_Magazine_732 11h ago
Nose hair so thick I don’t think you’re even getting air through the nostrils
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u/PlaneEmbarrassed7677 10h ago
Just wait for the ear hairs!
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u/Gokul_Vivek 10h ago
Jokes on you, my ears missed the memo. Completely smooth 🤣
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u/PlaneEmbarrassed7677 10h ago
My mom used to do hair. I was always fascinated by the men who's ear hair grew as fast as the hair on their head. Mom would get them all cleaned up and sent on their way. Thanks for unlocking that memory this morning.
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u/8Bit-Jon 10h ago
Wait till you got older... There will be hair in places you didn't realise you could get hair there.
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u/simonbleu 10h ago
Wow, your hair is like a new standard between loose thread and a burnt matchstick
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u/Gokul_Vivek 10h ago
Tell me you're American without telling me you're American😂. Brb, rushing to patent this new measurement before someone beats me to it🏃♂️
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u/imacatpersonforreal 9h ago
I pull about 20 of these from my nose about every other day, otherwise the inside of my nose gets super irritated.
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u/Snoo_98156 14h ago
but there had to be time in your life, when they were about the same size, right?
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u/breathing_normally 11h ago
Perhaps with your invention, the long course scalp hair of formerly bald men will end air pollution as well as insecurity!
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u/0ddlyC4nt3v3n 10h ago
Don't pluck those, just think of the potential for an indestructible comb-over
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u/To-To_Man 10h ago
Partially related, but I got an ingrown nostril hair the other day. Thought it was just a pimple, hurt like a bitch when I grazed my nose.
I saw a pimple "head" forming and decided to try for some relief. After less squeezing than expected, an eruption of pus followed by an entire unfurled nostril hair rocketing from the outside of my nose across the room. It was horrifying to watch, but gave me so much relief I kind of want to experience it again.
Anyways if that fucking load bearing nose hair got ingrown, you would be walking around with a lethal weapon. Bursting that sucker free would chip stone.
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u/shifty_coder 7h ago
Scalp hairs are fine and numerous to insulate your scalp. Nose hairs are few and fibrous to work with mucus to catch debris and irritants entering your sinuses.
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u/somegobbledygook 7h ago
I've got a mega one like this in my left nostril, but it grows into a curly fry.
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u/Exact-Difference-422 6h ago
Related but if anyone has nose trimmer recs I am tired of getting ones that don't do shit.
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u/SnooMacarons3689 15h ago
Thanks for only showing those 2 kinds of hairs