I was married for 4 years and it was a total love at first sight marriage, he was 8 years younger to me and he swore that he needed me to spend the rest of his life with me.
I’m from a very educated and well structured and well mannered family background I went to a prominent girls school in Colombo and his parents are rich but non educated and very abusive and not well mannered. He went to a prominent boy school out of Colombo
We got married and went out from our houses to live independently. He was not working at all and I had to take care of the finances.
After 3rd year I asked him to let’s go back to our houses because I was exhausted. We went to his parents place and it was a total disaster. The mother in law was abusing me mentally and verbally whole time and I had to record them and made him listen to that and I came back to my house. Even several times they called me “W$$A BA$$$a” and I was sick to my stomach because in my house my parents are very respectful towards each other and I have never heard of them speaking these “kunuharupa” at home, this is my very first time also hearing these type of words
His mother is a narcissist and I heard that she has been physically abused by her husband and cheated and he was mammas boy and he stayed there with some issues, since they are doing some family business his parents didn’t give him any access to that because they didn’t want me to enjoy the money and comfort what he is providing from their business.
I didn’t want it anyways because I’m the only child and I am in very senior position and I m earning very good money and I’m pretty much comfortable.
Their family never respected me infront of me but they have bosted about me to outsiders, I felt like they are using me for their status.
So I knew I’m falling out of love, because he was so avoiding me and my needs, there were no conversations, no spark and even if I say something he stared saying that”he didn’t marry I’m the one who married him, and I’m the one who is responsible because I’m the eldest”
Finally I didn’t feel like even having s$$ with him because there were no intimacy or affection.
This was a torture for me and after one year of verbal physical and mental abuse I finally decided to file the divorce.
I didn’t cheat, I didn’t even try to hurt him, I was very polite to his abusive parents also.
I truly loved the guy like a parent.
But finally I’m the one who cannot move forward too. I heard that he is seeing other people and I am very disappointed to hear that.
I need to hear others opinions about similar situations.
Thank you 🫶