I’m an anaesthesiologist at a cancer institute, so naturally I work with the sickest population in all age demographics.

We recently had an infant have a mass removed near the genitalia. While in the PACU, her aunt pulls me over to the side and asks “will her uterus be okay after she heals”? (Not so) indirectly asking will she be able to have children later in life.

I couldn’t hold it in, I snapped at her and told her to worry about her life first, not her uterus. I’m usually very nice to all my patients and their families, but sometimes you have a straw-breaking-the-camel’s-back moment, and this was mine.

Throughout my training and beyond, I have come across an astonishing level of invasiveness in women’s fertility and that somehow a girl child is only worth if her incubator parts are intact.

I don’t know how much longer I can stay in medicine and not completely lose my sanity.

Idont mean your friends or people who are of actual importance to you obviously before a pro-child person finds this post😭 but celebs or influencers. One I used to find did entertaining and funny streams just announced her pregnant and I immediately unfollowed knowing what is to come

Its not that I am unhappy for her or trying to seem sour but I don't enjoy seeing pregnancy related comtent on my feed when I am staunchly childfree and have no interest in it. Like I am chill, I just leave it be

They only had a opening for 2 weeks from now sadly and that feels so far away, I should be able to get rid of this thing right now💀 I’ve been feeling so gross and weird this whole time I can’t believe anyone would want to go through this?? Especially multiple times??!!! Yuck. Hopefully I can get a cake for myself after. I’m getting a surgical abortion because i refuse to risk using the pill and having it not work. Me and the impregnator laughed and joked about how it gets deleted on his birthday and that’s hilarious. I don’t feel sad or scared whatsoever if I could get knocked out for the procedure I would but I’m going alone so my family can’t be nosey which means it’s gonna be local anesthesia. I always told myself if I were to end up pregnant this would be my first choice and I’m glad I can say I feel absolutely nothing but relief that this form of medical and mental care is available to me.

All my friends and family who have kids always want to shove a diaper change towards you and try to shame you into doing it. And then when you refuse they act like you refused a blood transfusion for their kid. Like I’m sorry do i ask you to clean my cat’s litter box out when you visit? I hate the rebuttal of “you’ll have to do this one day” or “i do this everyday, I’m tired from doing it” like both of those are completely your choice. And i especially hate it when they change literally anywhere they want at your place, like the fuckin dining room table or kitchen counter or living room. And again you get mad at them for doing that and they get mad cuz they think just cuz it’s a baby they’re excused.

Anyone get asked this, after telling people you don’t want to be pregnant or have kids.

I find it so horrifying because why would you wish that on anyone?

The mom gives the baby their body's nutrients, like vitamin C, and the mom NEVER gets that back.

This sounds alien af. Literally depleting your lifeforce for some little goblin.

I’m a personal banker and I get these men in my office asking me personal questions. One of the main questions I get is, “Do you want kids?” I say, “No,” and the response I get every time is, “When I was your age, I didn’t want kids either, but when I turned whatever age, I wanted a couple of them.” I have to bite my tongue so fucking hard I can taste blood. 😤😤

No fucking shit you wanted them!!! You don’t do any of the work!!! It’s so goddamn annoying. Like, of course it sounds great when you’re not the one being pregnant, giving birth, recovering, potentially breastfeeding, dealing with hormonal changes, TEARING FROM TAINT TO ASSHOLE OR CLIT!!!, childcare, or carrying the majority of the housework/mental load. You get to be “Dad,” go to work, and come home while somebody else is doing the 24/7 shit.

I’m sick of people asking me WHY, instead ask people WHY do you want kids.

This is the only place whee I feel safe saying this. I have a very weak uncontrollable stomach, like I'm the type that's already gagging just from seeing or smelling something gross. I've been this way my whole life, it's unfixable.

All this being said, if a pregnant woman started eating pickles with Nutella in front of me, I'd have to leave the kitchen silently before I start gagging. Like I get that they cannot help it, I'm not kicking them, just not in front of me please.. Hell, if I got pregnant somehow, I'd probably feel sick from my own cravings. Everyone else thinks pregnancy cravings are quirky, silly and cute. And sure, I'd rather someone say that to their pregnant loved one. But I just couldn't, I swear.

Posts, reels, phrases, etc. I feel like I know them all now, deeply understand the typical discourse, and maybe even a little bored of it now? Lol. Not in a negative way at all but unless I met a fellow CF person in the wild, I don't even really bother watching or reading CF content anymore because I've already read all the typical talking points, and already feel deeply secure and validated in my choices. It's almost like when you've beat the horse completely dead, it's just a bit boring now.

Any fresh/unusual CF takes anyone want to share? Or anyone relate? Lol

Because for some people those instincts override their judgement. Having children will never be "worth it" for me.

Restaurants are closing & don't have as many customers anymore? Partially because of the screaming / screeching children & their irresponsible parents. No one wants to listen to it!!

Also, being too expensive for the low quality / previously frozen food, too.

And it's not because she had a child. It's the circumstances in which she had the child. She went through IVF and had a child with an alcoholic KNOWINGLY, thinking a child would make him change and is now upset because he hasn't.

I was raised by an alcoholic and know what that life is like, and is one of the biggest factors into why I am CF. It angers me to no end knowing she brought a kid into this dynamic because she is in her 40s and wanted to be a mom and her "time is running out". She is is threatening to leave him and giving him ultimatums but it doesn't matter, that kid is tied to that guy now.

I can't look at her the same anymore and don't even know if I want to be friends anymore. I have told a few people about it and they are telling me I am being too judgmental about it because it's not my life and to not judge other people's decisions, but all I think about is what that kid is going to go through...

This is not the first friend I walked away from because they became parents, because to me they always have awful reasoning and it's ALWAYS about what they want, not thinking about what they're bringing their kids into.

I work in an office of all women, all of which except myself have kids. I’m on the fence with having them. I will probably be child free forever. However, I don’t understand the level of co-dependency these women have with their kids. They track them all day on their phones while they’re in school, they text them constantly throughout the day. They get mad when the kids don’t reply back quick enough. It’s all shocking! Like these women have no hobbies or interests outside of their kids. I don’t understand it. And then they act like martyrs on top of it. They complain that they’re broke and then they are planning gift baskets to make for their kids for Halloween. Someone make it make sense.

An essay…I’m 61F, never had the clock go off, never was comfortable around children, never babysat but once and it was terrifying. Once in a great while I will meet someone’s child who is bright, polite, not annoying, and I would think “Maybe if I’d had one like that it wouldn’t be so bad” but that thought passes quickly. I most assuredly would NOT have ended up with one like that - I’m AuDHD - I can barely take care of myself!

Around 1980 I had a very influential biology teacher who taught an ecology class and that was the beginning of my leanings that human beings are the worst thing to happen to this planet and other species and we as a species actually deserve to go extinct, especially with our head in the sand nature.

I have a 35 or so yo coworker who broke up with her husband, moved into a house with several roommates, and got pregnant with one of them who is about 10 years younger than her just a few months later. She doesn’t have income to support raising a child on her own. But, she’s ecstatic. What are the chances this kid will be one to help solve the world’s problems and not just add to them?

She waxes poetic about her pregnancy every opportunity she gets, very attention-seeking. She takes every opportunity to bring it up. I’m the last person to give her reinforcement!

I come from a family with three kids. My sister had two but my brother and I refrained. My mom was a twin from a family of 6. Her twin had four daughters and between all of them they had 13 kids. Those kids have had kids. My cousin recently texted us pictures of her cuddling her newest great grandson, seeking congratulations, and I could barely respond. All I can see is a future consumer, another human being adding to the unsustainable population explosion. (I know birth rates are down). I think about how many human beings my aunt and uncle produced, lost count. Meanwhile my nephews are 30 and 28, nowhere near marriage let alone kids.

Another cousin once told me that they had to have more children - otherwise they (the good, educated people) would be outnumbered. I was gobsmacked!

It’s not that I hate children per se but I have a negative reaction to joyous birth announcements and can’t understand how people can forge ahead living life and reproducing like there’s nothing wrong at all. I’m sick at the thought of my nephews having to endure what’s coming.

Additionally frustrating is how society is dependent on growth - it will be a financial disaster for the world population to decrease. The joys of capitalism.

No but that's the question.....does no one subscribe to the idea of "inside voices" anymore?

I am a barber, and it's back to school season....meaning non-stop kids cuts. Moms will come in dragging their toddlers behind, and sit their oldest in my chair. Then they will sit with the toddler in the waiting room, who proceeds to just screech with excitement(over what, I have zero clue) or running around our shop...mom NEVER stops the behavior.

I remember being told "we have inside voices" as a kid.....is this not a thing anymore?? Because I'm so sick of the screeching while inside a business, and God forbid you say something. "You're not entitled to a kid free world." No, but we SHOULD be entitled to basic fucking respect from other people around us. Can't believe that's a controversial opinion.

I'm in medical school in italy and last year we started our clinical rotations. Italy has a very old population and I can't tell you how many times I've seen elderly people, who have families, dying alone in the hospital without anyone to visit them. Today, there was this poor man who was unable to communicate or move himself, but was obviously in a great deal of pain and was curled up in the fetal position. The doctors were asking about his family, and one doctor said he has a grandson "who doesn't have time to come visit" and would only communicate with the medical team over the phone. How selfish can you be? I lost all my grandparents by the time I was 8, so I would have loved to have grandparents into adulthood, and I would for damn sure visit them in the hospital so they don't feel alone. Seeing patients like this always make me want to cry. They have family, but the family don't care enough to be with them in their final moments

Been married to my lovely wife for 3 years and we are aggressively childfree, to the point we considered our engagement official when I got a vasectomy. Don't let nobody convince you you can't find someone who don't want kids

Another post I just saw sparked this anger inside me 😂

I (35F) don’t have many friends that are CF. I love being around kids, so that part doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is when one of my friends with kid(s) complains about how broke they are and they or their partner has to pick up extra shifts just to pay the bills… but they’re going to expensive places: out to dinner, trampoline park, arcades, movies, theme parks, etc. or are buying things just bc their child wants them. A $30 toy every time you visit the store is expensive. Your kid wanting a new comforter six months after they already got one is not a necessity. Unless their old water bottle broke, they don’t need a new one. Your child does not need to have a monthly book subscription when they don’t read any of the books that they’ve already received.
It just bothers me so much when they complain about not being able to pay bills but go do all these unnecessary things. If they have the money, go for it!! However I just have a select few friends that will do this and I just want to tell them to budget better and spend their money more wisely.

Anyone else have this issue? Either way I just needed to rant about it so thanks for reading if you did 😂

I decided not to have kids for a multitude of reasons. After considering a lot of factors, it came down to, do I feel a need for kids? Do I feel like my life would be incomplete without them? Once I answered no to that, I understood having kids was really a choice and decided not to have them.

Some people around me get angered by my decision even without knowing my reason. What pisses me about this the most is how some of these people should not have had / ever have kids.

How can you have what barely amounts to a job but be out here gaming with me and more than me when your kid needs you right now. I went to school with some of these people. A number of that are actually not good at anything that can earn money and have not, at least from my limited view, have barely sought help to change that. Because of this, the few that don't have some family that just gifts them money all the time live in poor conditions. Even the ones who have family backing them are not doing so good. Something I noticed is, while academics and the ability to attain a source of income cannot be, on their own, used to gauge a person and how they will parent, a lot of people I know who are bad at those two things do little to nothing that would actually stop their kids from becoming, for lack of a better word, BUMS.

This results in a wide range of things. Their kids, like the parents, just expecting parents' funding for life, parents not giving a shit about even whether their kids go to school, parents using tactics that will never work to try and raise their kids, etc. On the last one, it happens a lot. I even noticed this was what was happening between some parents of my friends as far back as high school. You see parents setting unattainable standards for their kids without even trying to put the ground work for success in for their child. Like I have know you for more than two decades as far back as elementary school. You are were bad at all types of activites and subjects and cannot hold down a job. Yet, you expect that just shouting at your kid all day and using all forms of fear tactics will magically make them an A student.

Edit: Don't get me on the morals. Some of these people genuinely need to go to therapists and get evaluations. Some of these people act like there are no rules in the world and they can and should do whatever they can get away with. There is so many bad ways this can affect the children and the world at large that may have to deal with the kids if they turn out just like the parents.

I honestly did not think it could get crazier out there, but lo and behold... here we are. Ughhh incoming rant.

It showed up on another sub (popculturechat) earlier today. Take a look at your own risk. I genuinely need to know... who thought a C-section should be the inspiration for a pageant gown?! The dress is called 'The Layers of Life', and each colour represents the anatomical layers done during a C-section. Folks, I am both speechless and utterly horrified.

But somehow the statement makes it even so much worse. It says these are "layers we all share." Uhm excuse me... we absolutely do not all share an amniotic sac. I, for one, will never get pregnant, so please stop lumping all women together as though pregnancy is some universal experience of womanhood. Then there's all the language about the "extraordinary journey of bringing life into the world" and celebrating "womanhood, the human body, and the miracle of life — something that connects us all." That's what really pisses me off. Why does celebrating womanhood get reduced to reproduction? There is more to me than my uterus, FFS!

Also, let's get real for a moment. Global progress on reducing maternal mortality has stalled. Childbirth is still a major medical event for millions of women, that can result in trauma, lifelong complications, and even death. But sure, let's glamorize the anatomical layers cut through during major abdominal surgery and turn them into couture instead of using that platform to say something meaningful and genuinely inclusive about women's health that affects all women beyond reproduction. The irony is uncanny.

As a lover and supporter of the arts, I'm all for artistic interpretation. But turning the anatomical layers of a C-section into a glamorous gown and then declaring it represents universal womanhood is certainly... a choice. A deeply fucked up one.

Please tell me I'm not the only childfree woman looking at this and thinking, what in the hell is going on here?

How can you equally weigh such different lives? I can understand how wanting kids can come with reservations given that having kids comes with so many downsides and it's not a guarantee that you'll be able to live that life (partner, fertility, etc.), but I can't actually wrap my mind around considering both lives as viable options.

There is this poor guy that I have come across on my dog walks recently that has three kids (one in a stroller).

Now he choose to have these 3 monsters, but he looks absolutely shattered and overwhelmed every time i pass him by.

I compare them to my boy and its not even a contest.

SO SO SO GLAD THAT I DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN.

Does anyone else think it's hypocritical for my family to demand I be an uncle when my uncles never once attempted to contact, check in, or have a relationship with me?

It's like the most slap in the face thing I can think of. That's not how the world works.