r/comics • u/megettingkilled • 7h ago

What if it doesn’t happen

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We have to consider the possibility…

38.8k Upvotes

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598

u/ISCSI_Purveyor 6h ago

Most anticipated obituary in human history.

334

u/DialZee 6h ago

Most anticipated world spanning block party in human history.

126

u/Beautiful-Musk-Ox 5h ago

wear safety goggles when you go party, cops will be shooting people's eyes out with "rubber bullets" like they do every time we end up in the streets

59

u/Facts_pls 4h ago

In many countries, cops would be celebrating too.

It's only the US that needs to tackle the underlying issue that got him elected in the first place.

Trump isn't the issue. He's a symptom of the issue.

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u/Hungry-Broccoli-7193 3h ago

Trump is a system, but if anyone thinks the JD “the couch” Vance has the same pull with the base, they’re wrong.

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u/pyalot 1h ago

It‘s not about that particular populist cult or Trump, they are the symptom. This rot of the US society has been long in the making, across many administrations. It won‘t get any better regardless of who gets to the levers of power. Infact the whole partisan debate misses the issue entirely, it‘s just theater for the masses to keep them distracted to never quite figure out what‘s really wrong.

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u/Jonnyflash80 4h ago

If not real bullets, as we've been seeing multiple examples of lately.

0

u/UghFudgeBwana 4h ago edited 4h ago

When he lost in 2020 all the cops did was stand around and cry, so here's hoping they do the same thing.

-1

u/Beautiful-Musk-Ox 4h ago

you think people standing around crying deserve to lose eyes? why do you hate americans so much?

1

u/UghFudgeBwana 4h ago

By "they" i meant the cops. Lots of footage of them in full riot gear standing around crying their eyes out during all of the parties going on after trump lost in 2020.

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u/kkkr94 5h ago

Hell ya brother I'll bring the liquor.

SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS

2

u/Vissanna 4h ago

Ive got a nice big bottle of crown just waitin

1

u/HeyYouGuyyyyyyys 1h ago

These days, when I drink, I get dizzy and nauseated and hot, and I have to be helped to bed. That pisses me off SO. MUCH. because I used to love Veuve Cliquot champagne and I would have a bottle of that shit in the freezer ready to go.

But. I will go buy the biggest fucking yellow cake with chocolate icing that exists in town, and I will go face-first into that fucker. If you want a slice, tell me before I jump.

33

u/JAD2017 6h ago

Where's the line of him missing Epstein's parties?

10

u/dracorotor1 4h ago

I have an HD copy of “Yub Nub” from Return of the Jedi ready and waiting on every device in my house.

3

u/rexmanly 3h ago

this is the best idea i've heard in years

2

u/Sparkpad 3h ago

Do you have the Special Edition "Victory Celebration" theme too? Or are you saving that for when ALL the old tyrants are gone?

1

u/dracorotor1 3h ago

Elon deserves the Episode 1 finale parade, I think

4

u/ReeveStodgers 4h ago

Bigger than when Palpatine died.

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u/RadicalOrganizer 4h ago

This party is what keeps me going.

1

u/mOdQuArK 3h ago

His body count will be greatly increased - the cause of death: death by liver destruction

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u/Agret 6h ago

Putin as well

39

u/Puzzle-Necked 6h ago

Putin dies, Trump goes next before the dead man switch goes off and releases the Kompromat files on him

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u/Pristine_Zebra_6424 6h ago

Netanyahu and Ben-Gvir too

18

u/rubberkeyhole 4h ago

The other day my mom said she only watches the news to see if he’s died yet, and I told her, “you won’t have to turn on the news to find that out.”

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u/babbletags1 5h ago

Even beating Henry Kissinger.

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u/dracorotor1 4h ago

Who said something about “beating Henry Kissinger!?”

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u/Living_Awareness259 5h ago

I'd put Hitler and Ghengis Khan in 1 and 2, but Trump... probably top 10 for sure 👌🏾

2

u/A__Friendly__Rock 5h ago

We gonna put “ding dong the witch is dead” right up to #1

3

u/OutInTheBlack 5h ago

It hit #2 in the UK after Maggie Thatcher croaked.

2

u/Futaba_MedjedP5R 5h ago

I swear to God, the day that it happens, I’m going out buying a bottle of booze and getting drunk for the first time because I’ll be celebrating so hard

3

u/nihilistiq 6h ago

I won't read it

1

u/Lumpy_Addendum6297 5h ago

Damn, I should buy more champagne

1

u/Acrobatic_Key_1140 4h ago

The big, beautiful orbituary as I like to call it (I actually stole this from someone else)

1

u/Beard_o_Bees 4h ago

His grave may become a pilgrimage site for those wanting extra reassurance that he's, in fact, gone.

They should maybe consult a civil engineer before burial though - just to make sure the steady stream of urine doesn't cause too much environmental damage.

1

u/PM_ME_CUTE_SMILES_ 3h ago

Stalin and Hitler's probably were waited for even more. But it says something that I need to write those names for this comparison.

1

u/fishguru257 3h ago

Unfortunately as it's being shown with no reports yet on ol' Mitch finally kicking the bucket, 2 and a half months later, I have a feeling it's going to be at least a few months to possibly a year after the fact that we'll find out.

1

u/Cloudhiddentao 3h ago

Trump is worse than Hitler. At least had the good sense to take himself out.

1

u/1ForgottenPrincess 3h ago

y'know the beginning of Wicked when the children frolic through the flowers announcing the good news of the witch being dead?

I daydream about that moment sometimes, playing 'no one mourns the wicked' on repeat.

1

u/AerithCantRespawn 3h ago

I bet the first announcement here will be the most awarded post on Reddit.

1

u/cwood1973 1h ago

One day a mortician will get to super glue his lips shut.

1

u/Zenith-Astralis 1h ago

That old Russian joke about the man going to the newspaper stands every day lives in my head rent free.

"You always look at the front page, but never buy, what are you looking for?"

"An obituary."

"Those are printed near the back, sir."

"... Not the one I'm looking for."