Every time she drives on the freeway it’s a mess. She makes a beeline straight to the left lane and holds its her life line. To be fair she doesn’t drive right beside another car but she hates moving out the way for faster traffic. Some car will be rolling up on us clearly going faster than us. Instead of moving she’ll say something like “I’m already going 70” and refuse to move. Im just thinking to myself just move I’m tired of getting blinded by this guys head lights.

Always too fucking hot, too many people out and about, stupid ass kids are everywhere, friends always bugging me to get out and do shit, I can't fucking breathe or see, and don't get me started on the goddamn bugs, the mother fuckers are everywhere. Every time I allow myself to be happy a goddamned gnat tries to suicide bomb my fucking eyeballs, or a cock sucking mosquito latches to my arms or legs and tries to give me rabies or malaria or herpes or whatever the fuck they give humans.

Autumn can't get here soon enough, the little heathen demon spawns go back to school, friends fuck off and think its too cold to do anything, people hole up in their houses, its not too hot and stuffy to live and breath, and bugs go back to hell where they belong. Fuck summer

A friend mailed my daughter a huge care package from Spoonful of Goodness because she had major surgery a week ago. Our stupid rural post office didn't deliver it, even though my friend paid extra for overnight delivery. It sat somewhere for three extra days and all the ice melted. Everything arrived warm. We had to throw out 4 containers of soup.

At least the cookies and rolls were ok. Except my daughter's surgery was on her jaw and she's on a no chew diet. The soup was the only part she could eat from the package. 😞

(Yes, my friend got a refund for her order. But what a waste of good food.)

ive been trying my hand at dating again after breaking my 4 year relationship but its insanely hard as an ftm person finding a partner. dating apps you usually get people wanting to experiment with you, be their third or just a lot of people who think they can change you. Wanting to date someone who just respects your boundaries are so much harder. god forbid a freak just wants a real person to date. im very authentically me day to day and idk if that's what's scaring people away or not. it was bugging me for a while. i might say fuck it and try dating apps again just to torture myself. man, why is it so hard to find someone i fw :[

I'm homeless, and have been for almost a year. Currently trying to get a job and prepare for an interview later this week. I've been digging through the trash to get food, and it sucks. I hate it. Today I found a half eaten bag of chips in the trash and I got hit with a bit of that exciting adrenaline if that makes sense? Idk what it's called, but I got excited over finding edible food in the trash, that won't even keep me fed for long.

It's just... It makes me really sad. It's just sad. Hopefully I can get this job so I won't have to do this anymore but still... I'm tired of this. It is genuinely sad.

I'm a 20F and I work at a chain car wash and I hate it. I live in a very small town where it's hard to get any job that pays more than $9 and isn't hard physical labor, so I applied to work at this car wash around March and started working there in April. Since I've been working I have just grown to hate it more and more.

The heat is absolutely unbearable, the loading area is not properly ventilated so I'm just breathing in straight soap and chemicals half the time, the customers are unbelievable, we've seen people drinking and driving, get into accidents, all of it, someone gets mad at us every single day, the equipment is always broken, and my coworkers are pretty dumb. I work about 30 hours a week and I make $11.25 an hour and it is just not worth this shit that I have to put up with. I'm one of like 2 people there that can calm down an angry customer, and my manager can't talk to customers worth shit. Every time I have had to talk to a frustrated customer, the conversation has always ended at least WAY better than it started. But every time my manager talks to someone, they end up speeding off or calling corporate. My manager will also schedule only me and her for opening but like 80% of the time, she'll just disappear to do "manager stuff" and I'm left doing everything by myself. I have to work the gate, the prep station, and the loading station, and sometimes keep track of all of our towels and cleaning spray bottles. Also, all of my coworkers complain about everything constantly and half of them don't do their jobs. What irks me the most, is the people that should be getting in major trouble get NO repercussions. There's a guy that keeps showing up HELLA late, and he will just disappear mid shift to god knows where, and he got no repercussions from it except the assistant manager just scheduled him for 1 day that week to be petty. Majority of that kind of stuff is the manager's fault because she just wont fire people that need to be fired and wont hire people that would be reliable and do their job. I also work with mainly stupid boys and I can't have a meaningful conversation with any of them.

Something else that I am going crazy about is the fact that I am ALWAYS dirty. I dont mind getting a little sweaty, or getting a little dirt on my hands, but holy shit. Since I work around 7-8 hours every day, I wake up, go to work, get sweaty, get covered in water and chemicals, get covered in oil and grime and dead bugs and dirty bucket water. By the time I get home and in the shower, my sports bra is soaking wet and my socks are waterlogged. No matter how much I wash my hair, my scalp still feels itchy and it NEVER feels clean.

Also, my hands and skin are the worst they've ever been. My hands are dry and calloused and my face is breaking out constantly. It sucks because I worked so hard to get rid of my acne and I was even on accutane for it and that was ROUGH but hey it worked. My skin on my arms and legs even feels horrible. Blankets and fabrics feel like theyre burning through my skin when they touch me and it genuinely HURTS. I also have had so much joint and muscle pain since working there. I enjoy working out, but since it's a lot of repetitive movements for 8 hours, it has seriously taken a toll on me. My neck and shoulders and back and hips are in constant pain.

The heat has been genuinely so unbearable that when I got my period at work, I had to sit down (which is against company policy) because I almost passed out and my cramps were hurting THAT BAD.

Don't get me wrong, Im grateful that I even have a job especially in an area like mine, but it is so unbearable. I've been thinking about letting the weather cool off and if I still absolutely hate it then Im going to find other places to apply to that pay more.

The only reason Im working this job is to get money and to save up to move out and into an apartment a few cities away in about a year. Another reason that I'm scared to find another job is if they wouldn't be as flexible as the one I have now. My managers pretty much let me choose what I want to work, but they'll ask me to come in on my days off anyway. They also expect the employees to cover shifts of people to just straight up disappear and get no repercussions. I work about 30-35 hours a week, which is pretty good, but damn, I am so tired of feeling so fucking disgusting all the time.

Also, to top things off, I and another one of my coworkers have developed a bad cough because of the chemicals that are not properly ventilated. I know that it's from the chemicals and soap because I found a warning sheet in the office that was give to my manager by the chemical guys that come.

Basically, when a car is sent through the wash, there's this waterfall of soap that comes down, and when it comes down, it disperses and blows toward the person who's operating everything. That, along with the heat that gets trapped in there, I sometimes genuinely cant breathe. I am also coughing ALL THE TIME, and I wake up coughing stuff up from my lungs.

Thanks for listening to my rant and I guess I would appreciate ANY 2 cents for my situation.

Like gahdamn it, they are really full of themselves ruining everybody's energy and will keep on wondering why nothing good ever happens to them?

Maybe because people eventually get tired of approaching someone only to have their energy met with unnecessary condescension, being confident is attractive but making strangers feel insignificant just to inflate your own ego isn't confidence, it's insecurity wearing expensive sunglasses.

I wish life was not so hard. I’m homeless living in a vehicle. Don’t get me wrong I am so grateful to have something to live in. But I’ve had two major surgeries a year and a half apart, got hit by a car who ran a red light and a hit-and-run and fell in love with someone who ended up just not being compatible. And I have this amazing job now where I’m finally making money but I’m scared of my boss.

I’m still having health problems and losing weight seems to feel impossible. I feel like I’ve lost most of my motivation for life. I understand that I probably sound like I’m just nagging and complaining when I have so many good things in my life now compared to just a couple of months ago.

I just wish it didn’t have to be that hard for me to get to a nice little place where I feel a little more settled. I wish it didn’t have to happen that way. I wish the doctors had made better decisions the first surgery so I wouldn’t have to have had the second. I just feel like I hurt the universe somehow. The amount of work it put me behind on and the amount of Debt it put me in. I probably won’t recover financially for another year and a half as long as I keep this job.

It aggravates me when i try to discuss depression and some people will be insinuate i have nothing to be depressed about.

I am still overcoming childhood trauma and trauma that happened in my early 20’s.

But some people only understand depression from what they’ve labeled it. Many people will say that they’re depressed when their life is shit or when they are just sad.

Yes situational depression is real but most of the people who claim to be depressed the second life gets good they’re fine. Those of us with clinical depression aren’t necessarily that lucky. My life is much easier now but I still suffer with depression just not as severe as it once was. No one takes mine seriously because they believe mine is like theirs and that you have to be constantly suffering to be sad. Why can’t people just educated themselves???

A long life of being incredibly impatient has taught me how to do things quickly, especially tasks that have to be done frequently. I'm very efficient, because 1) I hate waiting, and 2) I feel a sense of responsibility to the people waiting behind me in line.

The problem is that I'm constantly encountering people who seem to operate with zero efficiency. I don't know why it is. Maybe they're 80 years old and have had a series of mini-strokes that impede their mental processing. Maybe they're catatonically depressed. Maybe they're dicks who think the whole world revolves around them. This shit is not that hard, man. it's the same 4 or 5 moves you have to use at every kiosk with a card reader: insert/rf read, pin, no I don't want cash back, loyalty ID, etc. You make these moves multiple times every day, it really doesn't need to take that long. You don't need a degree in computer engineering to adjust to a slightly unfamiliar interface. Finish your fucking transaction and get the fuck out of here dude. I don't want to run out my clock inside Safeway.

It just feels like when you're on the internet, whenever it's X, Reddit or Tik Tok, you'll get hate from a lot of different people or get ignored no matter where you go or what you do. I guess some people are used to dehumanising the person behind the other end of the screen but its really fucked up how you can genuinely be a good person/trying to help/just being here and you'll just be bashed for it.

I guess either I'm not reaching the right people or I'm cursed. Even if, I know its how the internet is but Im sick of people being this way.

Home in parentheses became I'm homeless, so 'home' is just the place I sleep at.

The library I'm at is closing soon. 'Home' is a four mile walk ahead. I'm just tired of this. Tonight is just one of those nights that everything just feels... heavy for lack of a better word. My back has been hurting for a while, I have so much dry, cracked skin it hurts when I move sometimes. Maybe I have an infection or something. Can't treat it because I don't have health insurance and I don't need to be put in thousands of dollars in debt. Once I get a job and get paid I'll get something to treat it with.

But in the meantime, there's nothing I can do. This whole situation is wearing me down. Living like this day after day is beyond draining. I feel absolutely worn down, this whole situation is exhausting.

Now all of my spoons are gone, I wonder if it's my prowler, because only me and apartment management have the keys and he is related to management

My goddaughter just made a FB post that she wants another baby. Her 1st just turned a year old. She's 24 with no job, no car and a deadbeat babydaddy.

Every time she gets a job, she flies off the handle, cusses her superior out, and quits. When someone asks why, her reason is "I'm not letting anybody talk to me like that and get away with it." She's had more jobs in 8 years than I have had in my entire life, and I'm 54. (Her 1st job was at age 16). Her focus is beauty school but sometimes she misses class because she doesn't have a babysitter or a ride back and forth to class. She also wants to model. Her priorities are all messed up.

Her mom (my BFF) and I have been friends since we were 15. We live one state away from each other (I moved away from home; she did not) but we remain close. We visit each other frequently and even take family vacations together. We raised our children with similar values. Goddaughter was raised in a 2 parent home, with present and involved parents. (Her dad passed a few years ago). All of our children are adults now; although they are not as close as we would like, they consider themselves cousins. She had 5 children (1 is deceased) and I had 3. I think goddaughter wanted to have a baby just because her sisters had babies. Her older and younger sisters have babies. Her older sister is a single mom as well, but she went to college and has a good job in finance. Her baby sister also earned a college degree and is an educator. She married her high school sweetheart and they had a baby about a year later.

I'm just sitting here wondering where we went wrong. She won't listen to advice from anyone, including her siblings.

When I saw that post, I wanted to jump thru FB and slap some sense into her (and I'm not even a violent person).

Side note: she has a government funded apartment and my BFF is struggling trying to maintain her own bills AND goddaughter's bills. BFF also buys diapers, formula, etc.

Dude. I can't believe it. I can't believe what I've tried to do. I'm not going to give any details on what I did, but I actually nearly killed myself. I was so close, but I pussied out of it. I almost beat homelessness. I'm just tired of being homeless, but nothing I did ever worked out. Shelters are too stressful. Intake for psychiatric care does give a damn. Every time I call they just hang up and I can only do intake via phone.

All I do is sabotage myself. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just at rock bottom. I actually came close and could have been... gone and out of it. You can be a dead homeless man, but there's no such thing as a homeless dead man. I almost did it. But I failed. Just like I fail at everything. I can't believe I chickened out... I'm tired of being like this.

I was just put on Zoloft and my god it is kicking my fucking ass I’m already being hit with nausea and it’s making my head feel weird I feel shaky and weird. Not to mention my libido is gone and when i do have alone time it’s muted and unsatisfying. I hoping these symptoms go down at least a bit but I am on 100mg so I might just be screwed for a few months.

Edit I am starting at 50mg for a week then I’m going to 100mg

Ok. My mom is one of those hated Boomers. Seriously, I can count on my 10 fingers how many times growing up she was able to afford to take us to the Dairy Queen. I know about the sexist remarks and gender inequality she suffered as a medical provider after going for 2 degrees in that era. Now getting on in life, she still works serving disenfranchised population. And yeah, though she looks forking great in the Tacoma she driv3s out of actual need, not because it is a cool cult ride in Missoula, and yeah, she buys her old dog a bag of food for $87, she struggles to send much on decent socks for herself. Why do you hate Boomes? Ageism is my guess. Maybe shove that? Ageism is still the acceptable hatred and , bud, you got it. So if you my mom ought an about and give her the dish because she can finally afford a decent ride, come find me, ok?

Let me try to wrap my arms around this.

It sucks, just fucking sucks, that we have so much and have never made so much with so little effort, yet so many struggle.

Yet a guy holds up a sign that reads “send beer money” with their Venmo and gets millions.

I’m not mad at them, I won’t blame people for getting lucky.

But this system is so fucking fucked.

Am just so tired of it.

And I’m tired of the human nature that fuels it.

Most don’t host big parties or anything like that, but I always make sure to give a little gift to people on their birthdays. And I know friendships aren’t transactional, but for one of them I spent their entire themed huge birthday party photographing the entire event for free, the pictures were incredible, and got her a huge present as it was a big birthday. This birthday of mine was also that same big birthday number

None of them even messaged me happy birthday on the day. I had to passively remind them in conversation it happened, and I got a belated happy birthday, one, two, four days, a week after.

Am I wrong to be upset? It feels weird saying I want something in return for all I’ve done for them