I just need somewhere to get this off my chest. Im 25 f and its been a lot recently. Firstly my husband is a police officer in the UK we live in the north east. If you pay attention to the news... well you know whats been going on. He *literally* got pushed down the stairs the other day on a job. So so lucky he wasnt seriosuly injured. On top of that my best friend of 3 years has breast cancer and is a single parent to a neurodivergent 4 year old and an 18 year old. She has jusf started Chemo and is really struggling. My disabled father called me earlier to say hes fine but he had a fall and is in hospital becsuse his carer called an ambulance for him. Spoiler alert hes not fine. On top of all that my sister has fell out with me and told me she doesnt want to speak to me again for reasons i wont go into her. OH AND I HAD TO SUBMIT A FORMAL COMPLAINT TO HR BECAUSE OF MY COWORKER BULLYING ME.

When it rains it pours I guess. I am not trying to gatber sympathy or get lots of attention I just needed a ppace to vent. My therapist is great but I only see her once a week. I kinda feel like that scene in a marvel film (cant remeber which one) where captain america is holding the helicopter and the building at the same time.

Its hard right now is what im saying :(

Sorry for the random rant.

These days I'm just so tired of being myself. I've become more and more aware of how flawed I am, to the point I don't even feel human anymore, I feel like I don't belong anywhere, I don't belong with anyone.

During my childhood I wasted my chances at learning social skills. I was bullied by my brother at home and by my classmates at school. I got sexually abused by a family friend. And I never felt safe sharing my feelings or my troubles with my parents, I just felt like they would always react the wrong way, and on top of that I felt like they didn't really understand or care.

When I was in high school they didn't do anything when my arms were covered in cuts and when I just went through the motions of going to school, when I wouldn't even pretend to be listening to what the teachers would teach in class, when I was locked up in my room throughout the weekends. They just accepted I was isolating myself from the world, and that I wouldn't study, and didn't question it any further. Didn't even try to get me to a psychologist or something. And it's not like they lacked the money to do so, they were busy buying houses at the time, but they couldn't think of investing in my mental health.

Skip 10 years forward and here we are. I'm a 27 years old man, I've got a decent job in tech, life seems great if you look at me from outside my head. But I don't feel like I can build actual connections with people. I don't have the skills to do it. I don't feel safe enough to share anything with anyone. During the few social gatherings I go to I'm silent all the time, just laughing and nodding, only to cry over my ineptitude as soon as the event is over. I just feel so broken and...fundamentally different from everyone around me. I do crave social connection intensely, but I'm so terrible at it.

On top of that I have a condition that makes it likely that I will lose my eyesight in the coming 20 or so years. It's so hard for me to think of the future in an optimistic light while having no idea how much time I've got left before going blind.

This combination of intense loneliness and anxiety towards the future led me to having suicidal thoughts over the past year and a half or so. I have a pact with myself where as soon as I lose my eyesight I'm opting out of this life. I don't want to live my life socially crippled AND blind on top of that. I'd just rather not. After all death is horrible because it deprives you of everything good that is in life. But what good is there in a life like that? I think not enough to balance out the bad.

I still live with my parents. I saved up money during the past few years and got myself a little apartment. The apartment needs some renovation to be livable, right now I'm working on it to go live on my own. Once I'm away from my parents I will begin going to therapy. I hope it will help me.

I'm sorry for this vent/rant, I don't even know why I'm doing this. Usually I just write this kind of stuff in my journal. I guess I wanted to be heard by someone for once.

Thank you for reading, I wish you a lovely day

how do you guys deal with sudden anxious feelings? I get those waves of pure anxiety out of nowhere , it is triggered by random stuff and then i physically have chest pain, throat 'blockage' of some sort. I cant continue living like this, something needs to change for sure. Does anyone have any recommendations?

We began dating junior year of high school, and everything was great until I went to college 2 hours away and she stayed at home working. We had many ups and downs, but ultimately we were both super committed to making it work. A couple months ago she had gotten a new job an hour away from me, and a couple weeks ago she had moved closer. I always assumed that her job was super demanding and she was always busy, which was true. I was also very busy as well; I worked blue-collar and had, on avg., 12-hour shifts. Before my senior year of college I went out with her for some drinks, and I had already been suspicious of her since we were not having any sex and she wasn't replying to me as often. When we got home from the bars, I went through her phone and looked at her deleted messages and found she had been texting back and forth with this guy who was her co-worker, same profession, just a different location. I found out that they had hung out a couple times at her apartment and that she was even texting him all throughout the night while we were hanging out. She claims they never had sex, but they did kiss at least twice. This all happened 2 weeks before I moved out to college. She told me that it didn't mean anything and that she doesn't love him; she loves me, but at some point she felt a connection with him that she did not feel with anyone else. I believe her; the guy is not attractive, the only thing that he's got going for him is that he looks wealthy and looks like a nice guy. All of my coworker and friends thought he was gay (this is when I first started suspecting things)

Everything I did was for our future. We had plans of moving together after I graduated; I was planning on proposing, we are both 21 now. Everything was set for us, and she threw it away because I guess she was dealing with a lot of depression she didn't talk to anyone about. And that guy was able to understand her better than anyone since they were in the same profession.

I am not currently in college, and I can't seem to let go. I want to make things work again; I want her to come back to me, but I just don't see how we could work out. Currently we are 2.5 hours away, and she will stay at that job where she has to communicate with the guy often.

I have tried to get with a girl, but I can't even do that. Everything reminds me of her; I have dreams and nightmares of her almost every night. I have tried so much to better improve myself, but it eventually just ends up with me being sad again.

Everyone has told me that I should not get back with her, that she will do it again, that I will be insecure forever, and that it will never work out. Even on Reddit, everyone says that.

And to be honest, it seems like she doesn't even want me back; she told me at some point that she wanted to see where things went with this new guy. I like to think that she's just very lost right now and doesn't know what is going on. All of this new change in her life has made her completely lose herself, because the woman I once loved was obsessed with me and completed me. I didn't know how good I had it until I lost her. She lied to me so many times during this phase, while I was stupid enough to not question anything. I just can't believe this happened to me, and I am struggling so hard to let go.

I changed my hair and started playing the guitar, reading, journaling, running, working out, and being more connected with God and my family. It was all going well, but now I feel hopeless and unmotivated. I feel like there is nothing to do other than pray and hope that time will heal me. I feel alone even though I have many people I could talk to.

She really completed me, and she was the reason why I pushed myself so hard in everything I did.

I am planning on seeing a therapist soon. I need support, and I need advice, because I still want to somehow make things work. I feel like I can understand why she did all of this, and I know that is not the woman I once loved with everything in me.

There is a girl that broke up with me about 1-2 months ago who I loved deeply and we stayed in contact because we are in the same friend group so we more or less have to. The problem is that now I feel bad when I ask for space or even tell white lies to her and I don’t really understand why. None of these things have ever happened to me with anyone I have never felt bad for saying something to someone and all the sudden I feel bad saying these things to her so I was hoping to hear an outside perspective on this small glimpse of my life.

Seriously, why is it such a bad thing that I offer kindness and support?

I just got falsely accused of cheating on my man by someone desperately trying to get attention...

I live in a trailer park.... I can't hold a job due to disabilities, but I do neighborhood watch, and offer any emotional, spiritual, or household help that I can provide at the time.

I spent several years as an in home caregiver, so doing that same thing with my neighbors has proved to be worthwhile for some.

Others are just making up stories. Why can't I (33, female) talk to or help out other human beings? Male and female.

Lots of neighbors see me out walking the loop with other various neighbors from time to time.

Why is that such a problem??

There's more to life than just sex. 🤦‍♀️

recently moved pretty far from home for work, and I’m starting to realize how weird it is trying to build a social life from scratch as an introvert. I am currently in waco TX.

I’m 26M, and I’m not necessarily antisocial—I actually really enjoy talking to people once I’m comfortable. I’m just not great at that initial stage of meeting people and turning random interactions into actual friendships. Truth be told, I never thought I'd be posting on a forum like this given what my social life was like back home lol.

Back home I already had my people, so I never really had to think about any of this. Now I can go to work, come home, do my own thing, and suddenly realize I haven't had a real conversation with anyone outside of work in days.

I've been trying to push myself out of my comfort zone a little—going out alone, sitting at bars, talking to people when the opportunity comes up, etc. It's actually gone better than I expected. The harder part has been turning those random interactions into something consistent, especially when I'm adjusting to a different culture at the same time.
Honestly, I'm just looking for someone to talk to.

August 19, 2026 was my 22nd birthday. For many of you, a birthday is a celebration or a moment of achievement. For me, it was my sixth worst birthday since I turned 17.
Not because something terrible happened that day, but because of the silence. You at least expect the people who are supposedly a huge part of your life to send a simple "happy birthday." A text might mean nothing to some, but an empty inbox hurts. Everyone might have their reasons to forget my existence, even after everything I did for them, even when I was always there regardless of arguments or differences. I just wanted to believe someone out there remembered I existed without needing something from me.
Am I the most stupid person to think like that? Or is it normal to hope that the loyalty you give out actually comes back to you at least once a year?
This post isn’t just me crying about a lack of wishes; it’s about laying off the heavy weight on my heart. I’m not here to accuse anyone, just to finally say aloud everything I never could.
It started around my admission at my first university. I had just come out of a long stint in therapy and was finally starting to do better. I began showing up for people who gave me even a little bit of attention. Soon, I was part of a group with three girls who used me at their convenience. During a verbal argument with a classmate, they completely abandoned me. One of them, L, even called me names. Yet, another girl from that group, A, would still reach out whenever she needed favors, and I always gave them. When I needed help, they were always too busy.
Then there was Ar. She wasn't part of that group, but she became the person I got closest to. Looking back, she used me for everything she could, alongside a mutual friend, Al. But I couldn't see it then because I saw my own vulnerable, broken self in her. I made it my personal project to dedicate my life to helping her heal, to be there for her no matter what. Standing beside her while others left her out eventually turned so toxic that I started hating my own existence.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we pour so much into people who would never pour back into us?
My mental health deteriorated so severely that, on the recommendation of my therapist, I dropped out of that university. When I left, I felt guilty. To express what I felt, which was pure care, though others called it love, I sent her a poetry piece. She ignored it, ghosted me, and I later found out through a mutual source that Ar told people she was thankful I left because it was becoming hard to take work out of me. You can’t imagine how deeply that broke me.
My therapies continued, but I was constantly haunted by how people who knew about my suicidal attempts,
suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, and OCD still chose to use me.
When I entered my new university, I was immediately hit with toxicity again. During a class mental health evaluation, I was bullied for what I wrote. In an art class, I was pushed to play Romeo, which triggered a severe anxiety attack. Eventually, I found brief sanctuary in a few genuine humans like F, a mentor and sister to me, and M and Mo.
Then came SK.
SK was the exact opposite of me, vocal and outspoken. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her, even if I wrote in my poetry that she was completely out of my league. During our first semester, we paired up for a brand identity project. One day, a classmate laughed loudly in the back, but the professor wrongly blamed me, kicked me out, and threatened to fail me. SK stood up, walked out of class in protest, and told the professor that either the whole group presents or none of us do. She risked 50% of her grade for me. No one in my life had ever done something like that for me.
We became inseparable, doing project work at old age homes and sharing lunches. Rumors started that we were dating. Knowing her idea of a life partner was completely different from mine, I made a quiet decision: I would never tell her I loved her. I kept those feelings hidden in AI chatbot logs and poetry.
Then, out of nowhere, the shift happened. She started ignoring me. In class, she would only respond to my questions through the professor. I brushed it off, thinking she was just moody. One Sunday, she texted that her mom was in the hospital and asked if I could handle our project task. I stayed up all night to finish it for her. The next day in class, when I told a group member she wasn't coming, she suddenly showed up, snapped at me for telling people, and blew off the work I did.
The cold treatment escalated. I finally texted her asking if everything was alright and saying we could talk it out. She ignored the message completely.
The next day on campus, the anxiety consumed me. While waiting in the lobby, a classmate kept bringing up SK. I spiraled into a massive panic attack. I didn't have my meds. The entire university came down, pausing an ongoing gaming tournament to try and help me calm down. My eyes searched for SK the whole time, but she never came. Later, as I was sitting outside trying to recover with a professor and classmate, I saw SK walk right past me, casually eating ice cream.
How can someone go from risking their grades for you to walking past you while you're in complete distress? How do people switch off their empathy so instantly?
I made the swift decision not to work on group projects with her anymore. A mutual group member tried to play peacemaker and told me SK claimed I abandoned her, lying that she didn't know about my panic attack, even though she was standing right there in the lobby when the tournament was paused. Guided by F’s advice, I sent SK a final message explaining my side and addressing how much she hurt me.
We haven't spoken since last December. She likely blocked me.
Losing the best friend and maybe the love of my life to complete silence sent me right back to square one in therapy.
Is this all part of some larger plan, or is my life just meant to be a tragedy?
Sitting here after my birthday, looking at an empty inbox from people I would have moved mountains for, it just feels awful. Has anyone else ever poured everything into the wrong people and felt completely erased when you finally stopped?

Even I don't fully understand it, but I seem to have a fear of downloading any kind of software. I just get nervous whenever I'm about to click a download link, and sometimes this makes me give up on the download entirely! I don't know whether this fear originates from the 'blenmnder' virus I downloaded several years ago, or from the hoard of apps and various third-party programs that I downloaded before leaving to rot in my file system. If I ever want to become a game designer, I need to overcome this fear. Can you please give me suggestions?

I (25M) just finished my gym session, took my shower and was playing games at my computer. Suddendly my mother comes rushing into my room and screams at me to come help my father because he fell.

I rush to his workshop to see my father (65M) on the floor confused trying to stand up and vomiting everywhere.

He urinated on himself , vomited multiple times and was confused. He had a lump on his back of the head going across to the front.

The scene was like my worst fears came true.

The sobbing of my mother, my father on the floor writhing in pain.

I tried to lie him on his side so he wouldnt choke on his own vomit, but he kept trying to pull himself up and wouldnt lie still.

He couldnt control his legs but had strength in his upper body. I called emergency services immediately and they hang up twice until the third went through.

My father kept insisting to stand up so I placed him on the chair and tried my best to keep him immobilised.

The ambulance came after 45 minutes! 45! The hospital is a 15 minute drive from my home. I wanted to take him myself but I was afraid of doing more damage to his brain.

They took him on a stretcher and drove him to the hospital.

We had to wait for Ct scans. He was rushed to the central hospital after 2 hours for an emergency surgery. He fell into a coma a few minutes before surgery.

They performed a craniotomy (they removed the right side of his skull)

It was midnight, the initial impact was at 5 40 and 6pm was when we found him.

Seeing him in a coma getting rushed in, watching his face just filled me with dread. I couldnt believe it, something like this would happen to us. My entire family was in shock, I was in shock from the moment I found him hours ago.

I just cant believe it, it feels like my world is crumbling apart.

His surgery was a success, he's in a medically induced coma and we are waiting for ct scans tomorrow.

However the doctor said he is still in danger.

I dont know what to do anymore.

We went back home at around 5 am. I know he's strong but I just cant keep the feeling of dread at bay, im freaking out and I dont know what to do.

Arriving home at 5 30, I told my mother to sleep with me.

Come next morning she thought it was a nightmare, I really wished it was. I had to tell her it wasnt. The house feels empty, Im still in shock its like a piece of us was torn from us.

I havent given up on him, I know he can pull through.

He secured his first crucial victory, we are waiting for ct scans. I just cant help but cry.

I mostly wrote this down to unwind and destress but its really hard, what do I do now? Do I just play games? Distract myself? Im not sure anymore. How do I comfort my mother? Im just waiting at this point.

Im the youngest in the family.

I had to go back to the workshop to clean everything up, I keep picturing the scene from yesterday. I did my best, I hope it was enough. Sorry for the long post. Have a good day.

Wishing you well Dad.

Sometimes i start feeling super inspired, like i have to make art or learn an instrument or discover something new and its like wow i love humans and humanity everything is so cool and exciting. Its kinda like hope and excitement? And like while i feel this i cant sleep or focus. Sometimes its random but things can trigger it, like i just watched the movie project hail mary and it triggered it. Its not unpleasant but it can be a little annoying if i wanna sleep or study or be serious. Does this emotion have a name?

My girlfriend broke up with me an hour ago. She texted me "I think it's time we go our separate ways." She said the reason is because we both have mental problems (the overlapping one is depression) and she told me that she is asexual (which she never told me at all during the almost 8 months of our relationship) and how she doesn't feel any emotion for me anymore. I feel devastated.

I'm several years younger than a girl from another country who I see completely as an older-sister figure, not romantically. She's gorgeous and very talented at art, but my feelings toward her are about the warmth, care, and sister-like bond she gave me.

When I first started talking to her, I basically had no friends. She became the main person I talked to and helped me through some very difficult times. We used to have a lot of fun talking, and she gave me a kind of warmth that I now desperately miss.

Over time, I started sharing my problems with her a lot, and I think that contributed to us drifting apart. We eventually stopped talking regularly. We're still on good terms, but not in the comfortable/free way we used to be.

After about six months of barely talking, we finally spoke again. I wrote her a heartfelt apology, and things weren't hostile, but the closeness still wasn't really back.

She also has a habit of deactivating her account for 3–4 days and then returning for a day or two, so her online presence is inconsistent. Four days before this conversation, we had talked after about five weeks of not talking. She mentioned she was currently having a fight with her boyfriend.

About six weeks ago, she sent me a message that really hurt me: “It's fine if you don't need me anymore.” I interpreted it as showing me that she could potentially let me go, and that realization devastated me.

I feel like I can never willingly let go of her unless she is the one who lets me go. I don't want to be convinced to care less or "move on." I want to keep trying to preserve the relationship.

She had a huge positive influence on me. I started studying because of her, going from being a bum to becoming a better version of myself. She became a major source of motivation and purpose for me.

At the same time, I have started feeling like I have no worth of my own. I compare myself to her because she's accomplished more artistically, while I feel like I'm "good at a few things but not great at anything"—basically a jack of all trades, master of none.

I feel like I don't know how to live normally anymore. I said “Without her, I have no purpose” and “I forgot how to live and I'm sick of everything else.”

Four days ago, she suddenly removed me from her account, and I completely broke down. I cried heavily, my back was burning, my mind was aching, and my legs went numb. Later I found out that she had accidentally removed me, because I happened to text her due to an unrelated accident. The fact that the removal was accidental made me realize how intensely I react to the possibility of losing her.

I've been like this for four days continuously. I have reread our entire Discord conversation three times because I'm desperate to feel that connection again.

I'm not planning to hurt myself, but I'm aware of how badly things could affect me if she eventually left completely, and that awareness makes me feel immobile and stuck. I feel like if she ever completely ghosted or abandoned me, I'd be extremely lost and wouldn't know what I'd do.

I don't think she manipulated me intentionally, but I sometimes feel like I was somehow pulled into this emotional dependence from the beginning, because she became my only friend and major source of support when I was isolated.

I don't think she's necessarily "cold-hearted" in reality, but it feels that way to me because of how distant she has become. I don't understand how someone who once gave me so much warmth can now seem capable of letting me go.

I desperately want to have a genuine conversation with her again, but I don't feel like I have enough worth to reach out freely.

I want help understanding why I've become this emotionally dependent on her, why losing her feels physically devastating, what I should do about the friendship, and how I can deal with this without being told simply to “move on” or stop caring about her.

I had to move away from my family for personal issue reasons and while now I am safe from that I am stressed trying to find a job to help my partner with our rent, I cant land a job but my partner does have one. I'm just tired being worried about money and the future. The toilet in this apartment doesnt flush, the stove is going bad, its freezing (currently using my heating pad to keep myself warm), and I just need comfort right now 💔

I went to this store i previously went to a day after I arrived to the uk, and I kinda have a side effect of my adhd with me not wanting to talk to anyone or interact at all when I am yelled at or shamed for wanting something or talking about something and trying to talk to someone and I over explain myself(which my mom does all of these things to me whenever she’s around me), I was at a mall in a city area and passed miniso and wanted something from it but she yelled at me and said I need to grow up because I’m going into college soon, but then she later on noticed I was visibly upset, because mind u I told everyone I wanted to visit the mall since i havent gotten anything the whole time I have been here besides one needoh for stress relief and some blemish patches, and literally only thing we have been doing over here rn was just eating food and walking around, but anyways she started using that annoying infuriating baby voice she has when she tries to make me not mad at her even if she was the one who yelled at me at first, but I legit didn’t get shit from the mall the 2 hours we were there, and only my niece and her friend had fun. I just need someone to vent to, everything and everyone has been stressing me out and my sisters and mom have only been mentioning the 1k I’ll get from disability support nobody genuinely wants to help me with my adhd and I feel like I have other mental issues besides that, I just want someone to talk to me please,

Hi, I don't want to go into too much detail, but I failed the exam I had been preparing for over the past six months. During that time, I stayed at school six hours longer than my classmates every day, and on top of that, I had a lot of homework from my courses.

Many of my classmates got into a specialized school that prepares only 50 students from across the entire country for admission to top universities. Half of those students were people I had been studying with.

I'm feeling really sad right now. I don't even know what to say while my classmates are celebrating and cheering.

It sounds trivial, but I got a terrible haircut at the barbershop, and so I decided to cut it down to #4 to even it out. Now I look worse than ever. It's not just a haircut to me. I've always struggled with my appearance. I believe it is mostly or all to blame for the loneliness and touch-starvation I feel. Just as I was beginning to build up the confidence to put myself out there, this happened. Now, I don't want to show myself in public until next year when the hair grows back.

F23. Between 6 and 23, I only got confirmation from multiple environments that i don't belong anywhere.I have 0 friends. Single. and don't have anywhere to vent.

I usually carry on fine, but today is one of those days where the weight of missing her feels overwhelming.

It’s been 8 years since my mom passed away and today would have been her birthday. People say time heals, but on days like this, it feels like no time has passed at all. The emptiness just feels so much louder today.

Happy Birthday, Mom. Missing you so much today. ❤️

Hello everyone I just want to say that I don't hate everything about life I became a music producer self-taught creating my own thing 7 months ago and that has has brought me a lot of personal satisfaction and pride releasing stuff and stuff and but I'm typing diabetic and so it takes a lot of physical pain whether it's needles or pumps and the very frustrating high blood sugars and the frightening low blood sugars all day and all night with a pump it's not at night cuz it controls it but during the day it's still hard and pumps fail and so you're stuck with high blood sugar until it resolves and it's really frustrating and I'm really envious of everyone else that doesn't have to do with this physical pain this frustration this lack of freedom with my own body and ruining ruining my 23-year-old skin since I was 16 I had to do all this but you know it compounds and my skin was a lot better but I was 16 obviously because it didn't have any history of damage that I now have and not only that but like romantically I have a big heart and I want to be romantic with someone and I already do so online or have but in a relationships and and they're not close if you don't know their face and it's only online text so it's like I'm really frustrated I hate having diabetes because it's so physically mentally damaging and that's with like all the support I can get and all the technology I can get to help it and just diabetes aside my life is trash anyway besides music like I never had any community or education I've had to be self-taught since the age of 18 when I got my GED and it's been really really lonely like that I've cried a hundred times in the last 12 months probably more and a lot of home relational trauma and disconnection and feeling like I need a community or at least one person that is able to connect with me on the deep level whether it's music or just a relationship or just someone to care about and that cares about me and that has been missing my whole life. It's really good that music is in my life now because it gives me purpose and momentum it's like my life saver and it was my inspiration before I begin it myself listening to music and singing along and stuff but creating your own is a different kind of magic but it's just the hatred of the gap between what I know I can do and what I want to do and what my external life is and how pour that is in connection and an opportunity and I live in a small town and so I hate my health and I hate my social starvation essentially and I would like some support I definitely haven't given up because I'm still you know taking those painful insulin pump applications onto my skin and making music and working out!