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Personally-made-to-order fast food pizzas? Sounds like a pretty good idea, and for a few years it was one of the thriving sectors of the fast casual market. So, why is it flailing now?

It was over a decade ago when restaurants like Blaze Pizza and MOD Pizza burst on to the scene, offering customers a way to build their own pizza much in the same way you could build your own burrito at Chipotle. Ordering at the counter, the customer would pick and choose from a wide selection of toppings, and then the pizza would be fired in a high-heat oven and available in a matter of a couple of minutes. Your own personally-made, personally-designed pizza fast enough for lunch break!

Hundreds of stores expanded across the nation, and then they faced the nemesis that so many other restaurants have had to overcome: COVID. With a service model designed for in-store ordering, the dramatic drop in traffic resulted in many of those hundreds of stores just as quickly shuttering their doors.

Pieology was not immune to this, either. At its height, there were over 140 locations; by the time they declared bankruptcy in late 2025, 70% of those had already closed their doors, and in the past half year, half of those remaining are still open.

Even so, I did visit Pieology to give it a try. I've had good experiences with these type of fast-food pizza places (like at Urban Bricks), and also terrible ones (like at Blaze). One thing I've learned is to keep the number of toppings fairly light, since the way it is baked does not work well with thick pizzas. An 11-inch pizza with sausage, tomatoes and mushrooms, thank you very much. And turns out, it was actually pretty good. I think the key to its success was probably the sauce and cheese, actually - far too many places skimp on both, and they didn't here.

Will Pieology be able to turn the corner and survive? Well, it's going to be a tough challenge. The entire fast food category of pizza has been in the doldrums for the past few years (from Domino's all the way down) compared to other restaurants, and Pieology may already be too far gone to emerge from bankruptcy intact. Time will tell.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

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This is a chain I knew nothing about - because even though they are a 'Tex-Mex' chain, they are located almost exclusively in Florida. Tijuana Flats apparently hit a few bumps in the road recently, that resulted in the chain declaring bankruptcy in 2024. However, it emerged months later, shedding a few dozen locations, creating a partnership with another chain, &Pizza, and with a new CEO are retooling their menu and services for a more value-oriented and non-dine-in experience.

In a world where it seems like 90% of the Tex-Mex fast food joints have devolved into the same, tired "Build-a-Burrito" model, it's kind of a little refreshing to find a place that still hews towards the traditional Tex-Mex restaurant experience, offering up plates of enchiladas and tacos and burritos more along the same lines as what you would find at, say, Fuzzy's Taco Shop or Rosa's Cafe.

My first-time visit experience led me to ordering a boring chicken burrito plate (and I tore into a corner to show the inside on purpose in the photo). And it was...okay. Just okay. Shredded chicken and beans and rice and some veggies, didn't really knock me out. I wish I could say more about how it tasted, but it was pretty bland, to be honest. Although, in retrospect, I think it may have boiled down to me making a poor choice in ordering. Looking at the menu in prep for this review, there were several other things, like the boom-boom chicken tostadas or the lime shrimp tacos, that would have been a better choice in retrospect. Oh well.

Tijuana Flats has plans to franchise their way to growth, quadrupling in size over the next four years. Big talk, let's see how it plays out. I'd like to give it another chance, if a location opens up nearby.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for...gelato?

Just a little store I ran across when visiting Miami's ultra-trendy snootier-than-you counterculture Wynnwood District. It's a small chain, but this would make the fourth gelato scoop shop I've been to so far. I always tend to think of gelato as little more than "fancy ice cream" - there are some differences in ingredients and how they are churned, but in the final analysis they are both frozen dairy-based desserts. So, good to me.

It seems to me, though, that "I Scream Gelato" is more about being the experience and the "being seen"-scene type of establishment, moreso than the quality of the product itself. As such, the gelato itself seems to take a back seat here. Two scoop flavor test, don't remember exactly what I bought other than one was a darker chocolate, and the fact that I don't remember is damning in itself, meaning it wasn't even good enough to leave an indelible impression. (It also wasn't bad either, which would have left an even bigger impression).

But what really spikes this place is what spikes so many other "snack" places I've been: the price. I mentioned four gelato places I've been to? One from earlier (Amorino Gelato, which was amazing), plus two more coming up for review shortly in my queue (Gelato and Co., and Paciugo Gelato). Those other three, the average price for a "medium" (two-scoop) was seven bucks and change. I Scream Gelato, however? ELEVEN bucks and change. Noooooooooooo thank you. Cross this one off my list.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE: This review series is scheduled to wrap up on Day 365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

A new beef heavy sandwich comes out August 31 at Mr. sub here in Canada. It has pastrami, Montreal smoked meat, swiss cheese, pickles, Dijon mayonnaise, and it's on an all new narble rye bread.

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I have been reviewing a different fast food/fast casual restaurant every day for the past 200+ days, and earlier I reviewed the following three restaurants. However, these three received "poor" scores for one reason or another, but based on previous experience and visits I knew they could do better. Perhaps it was an "off day", perhaps it was the specific item I ordered. In any case, here are some "second chance" reviews, where I am re-visiting the chain, to see if it can redeem itself and earn a higher score.

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Second Chance Review #40. (Original Review from Day 196.5): Great American Cookies (374 locations, 27 states)

My first review of this long-standing mall fixture had the dubious distinction of earning the lowest score possible, for a pair of embarrassingly expensive inedible cookies. As in, literally inedible. Brave of me to give them a second chance, methinks, but this time I chose a free-standing non-mall location, which instead of selling those big-as-a-dinner-plate cookies, sells more normal-sized creations (Dr Pepper can included in photo for scale). Even more ungodly expensive for what you get, though - still three bucks per, but for smaller portions. Yeah, I know places like Crumbl and Insomnia and Chip City are even more, but at least their cookies are thick and huge.

At least these cookies were edible, though, so I *guess* that's an improvement. But fairly plain and standard and no different in quality than anyone could whip up in their own kitchen. Second chance review may be better than the first, but still a hard pass from me in the future.

Meal Quality: +3, going from 1 -> 4. Meal Value -2, going from 4 -> 2 (out of 10)

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Second Chance Review #41. (Original Review from Day 206): Wendy's (5685 locations, 50 states)

As the 5th largest restaurant chain in the nation (by total sales, and including ALL types of restaurants), Wendy's is one of the most well known and visited fast food spots in the nation. They've also been in the news and social media sites quite a lot for their continuing downfall, both in sales and quality, as the brand struggles and struggles, and has been for a long time. Some other iconic chains (like Burger King and KFC) face similar stiff headwinds, but at least those chains are very publicly admitting their faults and are actively starting to make changes.

Wendy's, though? Well, they're still in the doghouse. They have a brand spankin' new CEO, who only just this past week publicly acknowledged, "we dun fukd up." As their sales are falling off a cliff, their stock is nosediving, and hundreds of locations planned for closure, he's got his work cut out for him. Well, now they've at least admitted they've made major screw-ups in cost-cutting and sacrificing quality for efficiency and failing to keep up with modern market trends -- but so far no turnaround plan. It may be a while before we can tell if Wendy's will pull out of their spiral dive or not.

Okay, enough of that. What about second review? This time, I returned back to basics. A couple decades ago, when I was eating Wendy's for lunch semi-regularly, my go-to would be to order a bunch of individual items off the value menu. And that's what I did here - chili and nuggets and one of their cheap burgers and fries and a drink - all around the two dollar-plus range each. Maybe going 'Back to Basics' would prove to be a good idea, the way it was with my second review with Del Taco,

Well...eh. Maybe not as much as my rose-colored nostalgia glasses would have liked. All it did was remind me that their "basics" were really quite mid-quality to begin with, even all those years ago. C-grade food twenty years ago, C-grade food now - the only advantage they've had is their value menu was relatively cheap for what you get, and that's still more-or-less the same now, even if prices have effectively doubled during that time period.

Meal Quality: +1, going from 4 -> 5. Meal Value: +2, going from 4 -> 6 (out of 10)

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Second Chance Review #42. (Original Review from Day 199): Corner Bakery Cafe (86 locations, 16 states)

Second Verse, Same as the First!

A different Corner Bakery location, a different sandwich, a different side, but really, the same result. I mean, Corner Bakery Cafe really isn't that bad of a place at all, it just really suffers in *comparison* to other similar deli-sandwich places I could go to instead. I could just as easily visit La Madeliene or Chicken Salad Chick or McAlister's Deli or Jason's Deli, and get a better quality meal for the same price. And that's pretty much all I have to say about that.

Meal Quality: +1, going from 4 -> 5. Meal Value: (no change), going from 4 -> 4 (out of 10)

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More "Second Chance" reviews coming down the line, in addition to the regular reviews! (And no, not every second chance review will be a positive one :))

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Just a little fast casual chain that is trying to make it big - Pincho Burger and Kebabs focuses on offering "Latin-flavor-inspired" burgers and meat kebabs (aka "pinchos"). Such as their "toston burger" with fried plantains instead of buns, or Pipo's burger with guava ketchup and maduro bits. I decided on the "Bacon Me Gouda" burger, which has what the name implies, plus ranch and carmelized onions.

As a burger, it was pretty decent. Nothing really amazing, but the burger was made well, and with all those ingredients a pretty good deal for the price. Pretty messy to eat, too. Fries were, as usual, just fries, and in retrospect probably should have tried some of their other items like fried tostones or queso frito pieces, or even a shrimp kabob. May be worth giving another try to see what else is good.

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Because I wrapped up this review extra-short (not much to say, really), here's a little extra. When all this wraps up I'll be posting all sorts of stats, but here's a look on Day 273 on the breakdown on how the Meal Quality scoring is so far:

• Meal Quality 9 or 9.5: 6
• Meal Quality 8 or 8.5: 21
• Meal Quality 7 or 7.5: 34
• Meal Quality 6 or 6.5: 89
• Meal Quality 5 or 5.5: 66
• Meal Quality 4 or 4.5: 35
• Meal Quality 3 or 3.5: 17
• Meal Quality 2 or 2.5: 3
• Meal Quality 1 or 1.5: 1

Basically anything with a score of 7 or above I would consider "recommendable", and anything 5.5 through 6.5 is "acceptable". But in addition to "Meal Quality", I'm also looking at "Meal Value" (aka 'bang-for-the-buck'), so both will come into play in the final analysis when I put together my "Best of" awards.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

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Believe it or not, this fast food place has Canadian roots!

Mr. Sub (formerly Mr. Submarine) is one of the largest Canadian-based fast food chains across the country, with over 250 locations today. The founder of the company retired to Key West in 1980, and decided to open up a Mr. Submarine restaurant there. Over time he expanded the menu beyond sub sandwiches, and changed the name to "Miami Subs Grill", and the company was off and running from there. (In fact, I tried to visit that very location when I was there, but they happened to be closed on Sundays, grrrr)

Over the next several years, Miami Subs Grill expanded up and down the Florida coast, as well as expanding into other states as well. I remember they opened up a location a few miles south of where I live right now, back in the nineties, at the corner of one of the busiest intersections in Texas. It's been a few decades, but I remember they had pretty solid subs. Only lasted a few years, though.

The company was bought out by Nathan's Famous Hot Dogs for $14 million, but internal troubles were brewing already. At their height, Miami Subs Grill had over 175 locations before they started to implode, and a few years later Nathan's sold off the company for a fire sale $3 million.

Since then, they changed their name to just "Miami Grill", closing locations left and right even as their menu was exploding and moving away from cold sub sandwiches, trying to find their niche. Nowadays, there are only 23 locations remaining, nearly all of them in the Miami metro area.

A visit to one of those locations did not fill me with nostalgia from the Miami Subs Grill era of decades past. Their cold sub choices are, shall we say, lacking, so I decided to order a philly cheesesteak instead. Their menu, to be honest, is all over the place. Anyone remember when I totally panned the Atlanta-based fast food chain 'American Deli' for also having a lackluster menu a mile wide and an inch deep? Same idea here - wings, hot subs, cold subs, burgers, salads, Nathan's hot dogs, Arthur Treacher's fish, gyros? Nothing looks like it stands out to me.

And if the philly cheesesteak is any indication, that's probably a correct assessment. Of course, not really fair for me to judge an entire menu based on a poorly made, flavor-lacking and somewhat dry cheesesteak. But all I can do is judge based on what I ate, and I would definitely NOT recommend the cheesesteak. And given how the company is continuing to shrink. I'm guess I'm not alone. They were successful once before, time for Miami Grill to return to its Miami Subs Grill roots and focus before they shrink down to nothing.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

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If I could steal a line from Youtube company reviewer Michael Girdley, "Welcome to the Rise and Fall...and Rise again, of Pollo Tropical."

This is an interesting company. Founded in the eighties in southern Florida, Pollo Tropical focused on offering Cuban and Caribbean (or "Floribbean") inspired dishes like citrus-grilled chicken quarters and roasted pork, with black beans and rice and yuca. The company thrived and grew throughout the state, and eventually was bought out by Fiesta, a venture capital group, which set its sights on nationwide expansion.

In the 2010's, Pollo Tropical expanded beyond Florida into several states, including Texas, Georgia and New York. But turns out the "if you build it they will come" strategy didn't work out, as they lacked brand recognition in the new markets and lackluster sales. A case of overreach and "too far, too fast" with a lack of media advertising. A few years later, the plan was abandoned, and Pollo Tropical closed dozens of underperforming locations including every store outside of Florida. (At the same time, the unlucky Fiesta had bought out Taco Cabana, which was also facing major issues, and continues to suffer, and may be one of the fastest *shrinking* fast food brands over the past year)

Returning back to its roots and familiar territory, Pollo Tropical was bought out by another venture capital group in 2022, which quickly implemented a number of changes to the chain, including streamlining the menu, improving the value proposition with items like the "tropi-chop", a post-COVID return to closing at midnight. They have since posted 40 straight months of consistent growth, and a plan for a slower, more reasonably focused growth plan outside of Florida starting in 2027.

I had visited Pollo Tropical a couple times before, a decade ago when they had their brief growth spurt into Texas, and was not particularly impressed at the time. But now, many years later, I get to try it again, so I intentionally went 'large' by ordering the "Tropical Trio" from the menu, one of the pricier items on the menu. Basically this serves as a company sampler, with a plate with churrasco steak slices, a quarter citrus chicken, and a serving of mojo roasted pork, plus the standard sides of rice and beans and plantains.

The slices of the churrasco steak were actually great, surprisingly tender (not expected at a fast food place) and flavorful, and definitely too small a portion, I wanted more. The grilled chicken was okay, about on par with what you might expect from El Pollo Regio or similar place, well cooked with a nice flavored crust but not as stand-out as the steak. The shredded pork was also pretty good, also suitably juicy (once again a risk you face at a fast food place), not very savory and flavorful on its own without sauce, though. The sides were pretty standard, the plantains were nice and sweet, though.

Overall, a better experience this time around from what I remembered a decade past, so looks like they've worked out some of the kinks in their system. Right now if you want to visit Pollo Tropical, you're going to have to head over to Florida, so doubt I'll be seeing them much in the near future; but if they do expand again further west, I would be happy to try them again. And get me some more of that steak.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

After years of boycotting Burger King, I finally tried it again. I saw online that Burger King took Wendy’s spot as the number-two burger chain. I forget if that was nationally, internationally, or whatever metric it was based on. I’ve always loved Wendy’s, and I genuinely think they’re better than both McDonald’s and Burger King.

I also read an article about Burger King “improving” the Whopper by getting a better bun and coming up with a new mayonnaise recipe, which, to be fair, isn’t exactly some revolutionary differentiating factor. So I was pretty skeptical.

I tried a couple things from the menu. I got a deal for a small Whopper combo for $10, then added a spicy chicken sandwich, ranch bites, and jalapeño popper bites. It ended up being around $27 and some change after tax, which is pricier than McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Taco Bell, Popeyes, KFC, etc.

Where do I even begin?

The absolute BALLS these people have to say they improved their food is insurmountably ridiculous.
Plain and simple: all their food sucks.
It simply tastes like shit. I couldn’t even consider it mid. This was probably some of the worst fast food I’ve ever had.

Now, I’m not some fast-food connoisseur or professional reviewer. In fact, I believe this is the first fast-food review I’ve ever written in my entire life, and I’m only doing it because this food was so absolutely shit that I felt compelled to document the experience. It’s almost inconceivable to me. I don’t think, in anybody’s wildest imagination, they could intentionally make something this bad.
And the price. The GODDAMN PRICE.
The shit-quality-to-cost ratio is completely off the charts.

First, the fries. This was the only thing that came remotely close to being considered mid. They’re a little pillowy and soft, but they have absolutely no crunch and are severely underseasoned. They desperately needed salt. If they had a little more salt, I could maybe give them a 5/10.

Next: the ranch bites and jalapeño popper bites.
The ranch bites almost tasted undercooked and doughy. The jalapeño popper bites were okay, but they were so bland I’d rather eat sand.

Then we have the spicy chicken sandwich.

Absolutely no crunch. Not even a respectable spice level. The bun tasted like regular sliced white bread, except there was about six metric tons of it on the top bun. It was way too thick, and that was basically all I could taste. There was also a ton of mayo on it, which somehow I STILL couldn’t taste because there was so much goddamn bread. It also tasted like somebody dipped the bun in water before putting it on my sandwich.

The actual chicken was probably the thinnest piece of chicken I’ve ever seen on a chicken sandwich. And again, I cannot emphasize this enough: ZERO CRUNCH.

To me, crunch is one of the most important parts of a spicy chicken sandwich. This is my go-to item at basically any fast-food restaurant, and even at regular restaurants. Hot chicken is top-tier food for me, so this sandwich was genuinely blasphemous. Whoever came up with it has probably already been locked out of Heaven.

Finally, the Whopper.

I had to get it just to try it. It is Burger King’s main thing, after all. First, I didn’t find anything particularly special about this supposedly improved mayonnaise or bun. They were fine, I guess. But the patty was the worst part.

It wasn’t just mid. It tasted BURNT. It was way too thin and had absolutely no seasoning whatsoever. In fact, the burnt taste was basically the only flavor it had, and it somehow managed to make the burger worse. It would have been better if it had no flavor at all.
There was one tiny slice of tomato. The onions and pickles were rubbery and somehow difficult to chew. I’d bite into the sandwich and the entire pickle would just slide out with half the contents of the burger because apparently Burger King has developed a pickle capable of surviving direct human jaw pressure.

The sauce ratio was completely all over the place. It looked like a kid took a ketchup bottle, stood across the kitchen, and tried to shoot ketchup onto the burger like he was inventing some new dumbass sport.

And just like the chicken sandwich, there was a HEAPING amount of mayonnaise. Again, I found absolutely nothing special about the taste of this “new mayonnaise.” It wasn’t just underwhelming. It wasn’t even mid. It was actually bad.

Out of all the items I listed, I took a few bites at most and couldn’t finish either sandwich. Somehow, only a few bites made me feel bloated, and the food was certainly nothing to die for.

In fact, this may be food that makes somebody die simply because of how bad it is.
Absolutely and utterly trash. Worthless. Overpriced slop.

I honestly hate Burger King.

I now have a lifelong rivalry with Burger King. Every few years, I decide to give them another chance. And when I say every few years, I mean like once every FIVE OR SIX YEARS. I go back, try it again, and somehow I’m met with the exact same level of disappointment every single time.

I would be less disappointed as a father going to watch my son play football, only to watch him sit on the bench every game for an entire season, six years straight, than I am spending nearly $30 on some of the most absolute garbage imaginable.

Food that doesn’t just taste bad, but somehow makes you FEEL bad afterward.

Fuck Burger King.

Wendy’s and Taco Bell are the GOATs.
And I don’t want to hear any Wendy’s slander in here because you will make an opp out of me.
Their chicken sandwich is genuinely good. Always hot, always crispy, and somehow almost refreshing-tasting, which is abnormal for fast food. Their Dave’s burgers kind of suck, but their regular cheeseburgers, like the double cheeseburger, are good. Their fries are better too.

I had to throw in some positive words for my girl Wendy.

I’m now going to go cry in a corner, upset that I ate this food, because more than anything I’m mad at MYSELF for giving Burger King the time of day when I already knew it was going to be terrible.

This may result in a lifetime Burger King ban for me.
This is probably the third chance I’ve given Burger King over a roughly 10-year period, and all three experiences have come to the exact same conclusion.
The best thing Burger King could do for itself is completely shut down every location on Earth.
Nuclear Armageddon would be a better experience than going to your average Burger King. fuck you Burger King

Rating: -INFINITY/10

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Another day, another premium fru-fru high-end ice cream brand.

I've said this before, but it seems there's a bazillion different ice cream shops out there, all pushing their frozen confectionaries -- some for a somewhat-reasonable price, others selling for, well, the sky's the limit.

Kilwin's origins dates back to the forties in a little shop along the northern shores of Michigan, and has been slowly expanding to open ice cream and candy stores along the eastern half of the United States for the past forty years. While other ice cream stores keep touting their 'premium' brands, Kilwin's takes it one step further and calls their ice cream "SUPER-premium". And to back up their hubris, they were named the #1 ice-cream/dessert brand in the 2026 USA Today survey.

Well, all well and good, but I'll be the judge if they are super-premium or not. Finding a little shop along the main drag in downtown Key West, I order a two-scoop waffle cone, with a scoop of dark chocolate and a scoop of pistachio (one of my guilty pleasures, sue me).

And yes, it was very good, creamy, strongly-flavored ice cream. ("strongly-flavored" may sound like a weird descriptor, but yes I like bold tastes, there's little worse than ordering chocolate ice cream and whatever imitation ingredients they use are so meek that you can't even tell if it's supposed to be chocolate or not) Although, to be honest, I don't think I've had a bad tasting ice cream in this review series yet. Haagen-Dazs, Sloan's, Van Leeuwen, Ben and Jerry's, Marble Slab, Bruster's, Cold Stone, Handel's, Jeni's, Dumont, Ked's, Kwality, Baskin-Robbins -- I'll take them all. (I have had poor quality store-bought ice cream before, though, usually those companies that are forced to advertise as "frozen dessert" instead of ice cream because they technically do not have enough dairy)

So, if they're all good, then what's the difference? Well, there's the flavor selection and presentation, of course. But really, it's the price that's the major difference between all these places. For a similar-sized serving, prices can range anywhere between six dollars, up to as high as (not kidding) fifteen dollars. And Kilwin's falls upon the higher end of the range, just a shade higher than the last ice cream place I reviewed, Van Leeuwen's, clocking in at eleven bucks. Very good ice cream, sure, but that's a pretty large bill to swallow at the same time.

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE: This review series is scheduled to wrap up on Day 365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

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This time, something a little different. This is a review about a FORMER fast food chain, where locations still exist, but they are no longer part of a single corporate entity any more. I've done this a few times before, with places like Alvin Ord's and Griff's Hamburgers, and this time it's for an Indiana-born original: Sir Pizza (or in Indiana sometimes known as Pizza King).

Founded in the fifties, Sir Pizza serves up a style of pizza that, as far as I can tell, is local to a few chains in the area. Known for their slogan "good to the very edge", the pizzas are flat without an edge-crust, toppings covering the entire pizza. The crust is generally thin and crispy, almost but not quite cracker-like. Pizzas are square-cut, and meat toppings like pepperoni are sprinkled as crumbles rather than whole pieces.

You can find Sir Pizza restaurants in seven states, but under different owners who have different menu variations. Yet the general pizza concept is still the same at all of them. The location I visited was in far-flung Key Biscayne, at a storefront that is literally older than I am, a true cornerstone of the community, that the founder of Sir Pizza opened when he moved there, and continued to operate until his death a couple years ago. Today it is run by the founder's son, still serving the original recipe pizzas for over half a century.

So, I ordered the closest equivalent on their menu to an all-meat medium (12-inch) pizza, which in this case was their 10-inch small (the alternative would have been next size up, a 14-inch that would have clocked in at an eye-watering thirty bucks, no thank you). And if that pizza in the photo looks disappointingly small to you, then you're in good company. It was, indeed, small. Price with drink and tax for what you see there was -- hold on to your wallets -- nineteen bucks. Ouch.

Well, expensive pizza is nothing new, but the next question is, how did it taste? It tasted okay; satisfactory, even. I'm not a cracker-crust pizza type guy, usually, but it worked well here, and it was well covered from edge to edge with toppings and sauce and cheese, just as advertised. Good flavor, but nothing to write home about.

...Yet the entire time, I had this itch in the back of my mind, telling me "This remind me of something." And I couldn't quite put a finger on it at the time, but it was annoying me, just how much the taste and feel of this pizza was so much like something I had before.

Then, days later, it clicked. You know those two-dollar frozen Totino's Party Pizzas you find in the supermarket frozen section? THIS WAS EXACTLY LIKE THAT. Same crust, same crumble toppings, same taste profile, the only difference is Totino's are square while Sir Pizza is round. That's it.

Here's the thing: I LIKE those cheap trash Totino's pizzas. Yeah, I know they're literal junk, but I have a soft spot for them. Perhaps one of the only processed frozen food-aisle items that I can say that, but screw it, I like what I like. That being said, why the fuck would I ever want to go to Sir Pizza and drop a twenty for a pizza that has the same serving size and tastes exactly the same as what I could get for only two bucks at the supermarket?

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(About this review series: Starting in late 2025, I am visiting a different fast food/fast casual chain every day, until I run out of places to visit. Aiming to review as many chains on the Technomics Top 500 Restaurants list as possible, plus key/important regional and some local chains as well. UPDATE - I will be wrapping up this review series with Day #365. And no, I haven't gained weight, and no, it hasn't hurt my health.)

These are only available on Wednesdays for whatever reason. The price may vary. I've seen them for $4.99, but here in the PNW it's more expensive at $5.99. Even at that price, it's a decent deal though, for the mount of food you get. The biscuit, mashed potatoes, and coleslaw is pretty much the standard KFC fair. The country fried steak patty is a bit larger than it looks here, because the potatoes are covering the end of it, but it's about the size of a standard crispy chicken patty, but a bit longer. The steak is more like a salisbury steak than a typical steak, and is sort of akin to something you might find in a frozen dinner. That said, it is tender and tastes pretty good, so there's that. All said, it's not amazing, but it's a decent value for the price. 7/10.