r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Charming_Meet_6358 • 9h ago
Don't hug me I'm scared My Dad didn’t mention the necklace he got me was real gold and I’ve been chewing on it😭
For my 16th birthday my dad gave me a necklace and no one mentioned it was real gold or anything. I thought it was just a cute necklace. And I DONT get expensive gifts on my birthday at all. So I had no right to think this would be a valuable gift, considering on my 15th birthday my dad got me a hoodie, and on my 14th some flowers and candy, and if there were any expensive gifts they made sure to remind me of it beforehand.
Now I've been wearing it all day, wearing it to the shower and everything. And then my dumbass was also chewing on it cause there’s something fucking wrong with me. I like chewing on shit. And after one bazillion years my mom finally decided to tell me that it was real gold and apparently this necklace was like $500-600 or something and MY.HEART.SANK.
That’s a lot of money to me, I kind of don’t know what to do now, I put it away locked in my closet for now
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u/neuralek 9h ago
At least it's better for your teeth? Those tend to be more expensive.
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u/friedeggjellyfish 8h ago
My thoughts too! Gold is softer and it’s ok if it leaches into your system
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u/Original_Total_3278 9h ago
Keep wearing it there's no point locking it away you may as well flaunt it now
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u/SafetyAdvocate 9h ago
This. Take a bit better care of it going forward but it's held up like a champ all things considered.
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u/runicshimmer 8h ago
Gold survives old pirate bite tests so your teeth won't hurt it
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u/Letitsnowgreatballs 8h ago
Teeth are twice as hard as gold. You can shave gold with your front teeth without damaging them.
If she bit straight down with some force it’s going straight through that chain.
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u/LittleKitten37 9h ago
Get a chew necklace to wear with it so you don't get the temptation again
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u/KeepOnRising19 8h ago
For the first few weeks of kindergarten, my son started chewing on his shirt collar due to anxiety. The teacher introduced me to chew necklaces, and they were great!
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u/Inner-Square2032 9h ago
If old movies taught me something, that's just a way to verify it's real gold. You were abiding to the instincts of your ancestors
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u/TacetAbbadon 8h ago
And it's the other way around than what most people think, if the "gold" dented it was fake. People would coat a lead coin with gold as the weight would feel more accurate then anything else.
Lead is soft enough that you can dent it by biting it, gold isn't.
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u/quatrefoils 8h ago
You bite it so you have a good grip on it, then bend it. It’s hard to do, but I’ve done it before. Worth mentioning that I did absolutely leave teeth marks in that thing though
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u/DangerousDisplay7664 9h ago
If it wasn't gold then it could have been some zinc alloy crap from China that could have made you very unwell! Let this be a lesson to you, I suppose!
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u/DrLeisure 9h ago
Maybe just don’t chew on metal. That’s what gum is for
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u/Charming_Meet_6358 6h ago
Gum is too soft, plastic is better 100%
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u/DrLeisure 6h ago
Fair. I mean, I’m a chronic chewer as well with 20 years on you. My teeth hate me
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u/ocsreviewer 8h ago
Why would you be chewing on it anyways? Its value shouldn’t determine how you treat a gift. SMH
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u/Charming_Meet_6358 8h ago
I chew on everything
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u/ocsreviewer 7h ago
Wait just to clarify are you mildly infuriated that your dad didn’t tell you it was gold? Or are you infuriated that you were chewing on it and you’re frustrated by your chewing habits?
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u/Kalkin93 8h ago
Wear it / look after it from now on, I wouldn't necessarily hide it / keep it locked up.
Hopefully if you still have it in the years to come, you can look back at it as a keepsake to remind you of your parents and the fact you chewed it at a young age would probably make you laugh in hindsight, would be a nice memory!
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u/SexualbeingAccount 8h ago
Wear it. He got it for you to enjoy. What is the point of having it locked away? What makes a piece "for special outings " is not whether it is gold or not, it's the style of the piece, whether or not it's too large and ornate for daily wear.
Yours is a pretty necklace suitable for daily wear. Use it. Enjoy it but treat it better.
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u/why_wouldi 8h ago
I mean you should also not chew on an inexpensive necklace, so maybe that‘s the lesson here.
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u/United_Scallion6177 9h ago
Why the fuck would you want to chew on a necklace
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u/CraftyMagicDollz 8h ago
People bite their fingernails. You know that right? It's a thing a lot of neurodivergent people do without having any choice in the matter.
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u/Mein_Name_ist_falsch 8h ago
Not just neurodivergent people. There are many reasons to chew on things. Maybe out of nervosity, maybe because you're bored, maybe it's just a bad habit you can't quit. I know a lot of people who have/ had an issue like that and none of them are neurodivergent.
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u/sympetal 9h ago
The good news is, real gold can be worn 24/7, shower and all, and it will stay the same.
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u/CatsMom4Ever 9h ago
Clean it and keep wearing it. Add a second cheap necklace if you can't stop chewing on something.
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u/Producer1701 8h ago
This is the answer. It’s made to be worn, not locked away. Or chewed. But wear it.
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u/burnt-beyond-reco 9h ago
So you are angry that someone got you too good of a birthday gift and that you can't keep shit out of your mouth? 🤦
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u/DeltaTwenty 9h ago
No, she's mildly infuriated at her own fidgeting/behaviour?
How is this hard to understand lol
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u/KatastrophicNoodle 9h ago
It really reads as her being mildly infuriated that nobody told her.
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u/Bucky_Gatsby 8h ago
I second this. It reads like she's mildly infuriated at her dad for not telling her it's gold...
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u/Dismal_Rectangle 8h ago
Not to me.
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u/LolaAucoin 8h ago
I agree with the other person. She seems to be placing the blame on everyone but herself.
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u/TrashyLolita 8h ago
I swear, Redditors seem to deliberately lose their basic reading comprehension when it comes to teenage girls.
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u/DeltaTwenty 8h ago
She's a teenager, she was shocked at the value because it's probably the most expensive gift she's ever gotten
It's safe to assume she just absentmindedly chewed on the necklace to stim and upon realising it's value immediately went into panic mode
600$ Sounds like a lot to someone who doesn't earn their own money/has no savings - I mean it is a lot of money but it's not in the "irreplaceable" category
The sentimental value of that necklace is probably higher
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u/DragonfruitFunny5173 8h ago
Expecting reddit users to have common sense, smh
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u/Fleece_God 8h ago
Common sense like not chewing on a fucking necklace you got as a gift? Lol
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u/TrashyLolita 8h ago
Stimming happens, it's normal, even when it results into a mistake. Being upset over a teenager stimming is what's not normal.
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u/Fleece_God 8h ago
Yall will do anything but take accountability for your actions.
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u/TrashyLolita 8h ago
The teenage OP already feels bad about what they did, wtf else do you expect them to do to take accountability?
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u/Fleece_God 8h ago
Not blame the dad as he isn’t at fault for any of this? lol
A 16 years old should know better
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u/TrashyLolita 8h ago
Blaming her dad? All she said about her dad is that she wishes he told her the real value of the necklace, she's not blaming him.
You expect a teenager to know the value of a necklace without the adult telling her? Wild.
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u/DragonfruitFunny5173 8h ago
People have anxiety, mental conditions, fixations and compulsions like that. Considering it common sense not to do it is extremely insensitive and overall stupid. People pick at their lip, bite their finger nails, twirl their hair, chew on pencils etc etc. It's actually much less harmful than many other fixations or compulsions people have (compulsive eating, smoking, drinking).
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u/TrashyLolita 8h ago
It's not hard to understand, people just have a natural bias towards any opportunity to talk down a teenager that it clouds their basic reading comprehension.
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u/DivePalau 9h ago
Chewing on stuff can be indicate of low iron in blood. Check with your doc. You may need iron pills.
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u/Th3_Accountant 9h ago
Maybe they just didn't realize you didn't know?
I mean, screw the fact you are chewing on it. You might also just lose it somewhere. I would be a lot more careful with a 600 dollar necklace than a 14 dollar one.
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u/Moist-You-7511 9h ago
honestly better to chew on gold than some undisclosed blend of pliable metals, as many cheap chain necklaces are.
The ideal number of times that your teeth bite metal is zero.
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u/MJMichaela 9h ago
You didn't wonder why the metal was a bit soft? Only ones I know that are soft are expensive or toxic.
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u/Pork_Confidence 8h ago
One day you will be in your 50's, holding that necklace fondly between your fingers and thinking of your dad and his gift of love. Those teeth marks are the real memory.
My dad brought back a gold coin from one of his work trips overseas over 3 decades ago. He was going to give it to me to add to my " pirate treasure" as a kid. He never thought It would be real gold.
My mom took the coin out of a case and bit into it to see if it was real gold and made two perfect tooth indent marks on both sides of the coin. It still has the mark. It always will while while it's in my position and that memory and those words are priceless.
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u/ZookeepergameDue2160 8h ago
The worst thing you could do is what You're doing now, Not wearing and being proud of what he gave you.
If you ask me, Stop caring about what its worth. All that it is is a gift from your dad, wear it and be proud of it, not of it's monetary value but about that its a gift from your dad.
On that same note, I dont think your dad would be happy seeing you not wearing the gift he bought for you.
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u/Letitsnowgreatballs 8h ago
I mean it’s a metal. A metal that doesn’t have a very high value as jewelry for resell purposes but does have a high value when melted down.
Personally I’d stop chewing on it so you don’t break it (gold is soft and will bend, dent and crumple before snapping) and just keep wearing it. It’s a gift for your 16th birthday and it’s jewelry so meant to be worn.
Not sure what you’re actually concerned about. The monetary value or the sentimental “gift” value?
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u/Fattydaddy1000 8h ago
It’s funny how people treat things when they find out it has value. Just think about all the things in your life that you have discarded because you didn’t see value in it
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u/proudly_not_american 9h ago
The fact that biting it did anything to the shape should have been a huge hint that it was real gold. The old thing about gold coins was to confirm they were real, because gold is a very soft metal, so if you bit a real gold coin your teeth would leave dents.
I will also note that gold jewellery being a bit misshapen doesn't really hurt the value any. The weight is still the same, and the value of gold is measured in weight because it's often melted down and made into something else.
So, while the part you chewed might look a little funny, you didn't really hurt it any.
In your position, I'd keep wearing it, let the chew marks just be part of its story, and then find something else to nibble on for the oral fixation.
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u/Exalodia 9h ago
i dont think the part thats infuriating is that its real gold, but you chew on basically everything at this point if you look at metal and decided that "this is a good thing to chew on"
buy gums or something, i know a friend who can't stop their mouth so they always had gum or sometimes candy available with them
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u/SliceThePi 8h ago
why is everyone hating on you so much for this 😭 i feel like i would've done the exact same thing lol
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u/chuckakoury1155 8h ago
so you were fine with chewing on less fine metals that probably have lead in them?
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u/Oraphielle 9h ago
Why treat gifts from anyone, much less your own parents, like garbage that you chew on?
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u/Titariia 8h ago
You never just did anything without thinking? I chewed the hell out of my Barbies hands as a kid.
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u/ceo_of_the_homies 9h ago
Why do you care? People chew on necklaces, many for subconscious reasons. She is not purposely chewing on the necklace thinking it's garbage I would imagine. You seem like the type to dictate what the other person does with a gift you gave them because it was expensive
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u/Oraphielle 9h ago
Why do I care? I don’t. But OP posted on a public forum, soliciting feedback. Do you think you are a white night or something do you think that OP is going to bang your or something because of your offense on her behalf?
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u/xXNeo11Xx 8h ago
You obviously care enough to post on the forum. And you post on the same forum yet, you don't expect feedback? And when you do, you attack the replier. I'd say its ironic if it wasn't overshadowed by the blatant hypocrisy.
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u/thishyacinthgirl 8h ago
White knight*
Why are you so aggressive? It does indeed seem like you care about how OP treats presents, as well as anyone saying "it's not a big deal."
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u/Pudddddin 8h ago
Why do I care? I don’t. But OP posted on a public forum, soliciting feedback.
You certainly cared enough to cater to what you felt was a call for feedback and commented anyway lol
Do you think you are a white night or something do you think that OP is going to bang your or something because of your offense on her behalf
Oh, it's just a clownpost
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u/Murderous_Turkey 8h ago
Yeah OP. How DARE you wear a gift from a beloved family member and use it to find peace and comfort??
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u/ThaGr1m 9h ago
Most people chew on their chains. Nothing to do with disrespect cause it normally doesn't damage the chains....
Now gold is a weak metal which does make it an issue
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u/CheshiretheBlack 9h ago
Saying "most" is probably a reach
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u/Pudddddin 8h ago
I agree "most" is a reach, but there's enough people out there that do this that there's a whole market of "chewlery" out there to cater to it
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u/Diptothaset 9h ago
The fact you’re teeth aren’t broken should’ve been a sign it was a very soft metal
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u/PalinodePrayer 8h ago
The closet yes, the perfect place to lose the necklace for many more years safely.
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u/TrashyLolita 9h ago
This comment section is so weird. Y'all so mad over a teenage girl stimming wtf 💀
"SHE'S WHINING OVER GETTING AN EXPENSIVE GIFT." No, she isn't.
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u/DisegnoLuce 9h ago
I'm not an appraiser, but as far as I know, chewed gold is worth the same price per gram as unchewed gold.
For now, it's an item you love, and you've just personalised it a little.
I'd just make sure that your chewing hasn't compromised the structural integrity of the chain (lest it fall off without you noticing, which would be sad)
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u/The-Salty-gamer 8h ago
Don’t worry too much, the value of the gold is still there. It will increase in value over time with or without teeth marks. In the future, precious metals should be stamped. It’s a little confusing because the K is percentage of gold not diamond weight. 14k, 18k, 21k is hard to find in this country. So I’m guessing 14k, only 58.3% gold. That’s an investment piece, and it still is. Important to not lose it.
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u/Charming_Meet_6358 8h ago
it’s 21k
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u/The-Salty-gamer 4h ago
Nice 87.5% gold even better. Tell yourself it’s Toxic so you don’t chew on it again. Anything is toxic if you eat enough of it, so it’s technically true. I suspect my daughter would also chew on it. She’s younger but I doubt that will change. Got her to stop chewing on books at least.
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u/TheMothHour 8h ago
This!
Also, you can find a jeweler who might be able to fix the bent piece. Even if you looked into it, it would demonstrate to your parents that you value the gift.
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u/Specific_Share_4093 9h ago
Just don't KEEP chewing on it, no big deal. Still has its value 🤷(and assuming you didn't MUNCH it, I wouldn't expect it's got any apparent deformations)
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u/Boring_Builder_5258 9h ago
I dont want to offend or anything. But I believe the $500-600 figure is a retail price. He may well have paid that, however the necklace looks to be worth $100 max.
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u/AnotherDamnTransAlt 9h ago
You probably haven’t reduced the weight, which is the real value of gold. Chew all the beads and then it’ll look artistic and deliberate!
Please don’t beat yourself up about this. Nobody told you, and it can still look cool and be wearable with the crushed beads.
I think it’ll look cooler, actually.
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u/Floppyhoofd_ 9h ago
Who chews on a necklace? 🫤 A pencil I get, but a gifted necklace, not really. 😅
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u/iDoWeird 9h ago
Some neurodivergent people have oral fixations and literally need wearable chewies around their necks. Idk anything about OP, but it’s one possibility.
At least those are meant to be chewed…ND or NT, OP needs to chew on something else if it’s a compulsory thing.
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u/Floppyhoofd_ 8h ago
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u/iDoWeird 8h ago
Np! It’s definitely one of those things that you wouldn’t be expected to know without knowing someone with that need
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u/misterphuzz YELLOW! 9h ago
Yeah, he definitely should have told you. Honey, now I don't want you to chew on this necklace because it cost me a lot of money.
Maybe he should have gotten your two necklaces. That one, and a Dollar Tree necklace so that you would have one to chew on.
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9h ago edited 9h ago
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u/Pudddddin 9h ago
Why would 16 years old be relevant? Compulsive chewing on things is extremely common in adults. No need to shame someone for a mental health struggle lmao
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u/Oraphielle 8h ago
Haha still going at it I see. Even on other folk’s posts. OP is not going to show you her boobies.
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u/secondphase 9h ago
You think YOU are mildly infuriated? Wait till you give someone an expensive gift and they chew on it.
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u/simm07 9h ago
Not trying to shit on you but it was a gift. Why would you chew on your gift? Why does the price point now change the value of the gift? Your 16, you should know better.
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u/0w0whatisthis 9h ago
You're*
Your 19 years old judging by you're username, you should know better grandmar
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u/Oraphielle 8h ago edited 8h ago
You corrected the form of ‘you are’, and then proceeded to immediately butcher it yourself. Go take your soapbox and yell at a mirror for some more practice lol.
Grandmar? Omg this post gave me the giggles.
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u/WhitWhit7114 9h ago
I find it mildly infuriating that you chewed on the necklace. That’s nasty lol
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u/LoadZealousideal7778 8h ago
Better to chew a gold necklace than one that leeches cheap metals from it.
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u/acopper87 8h ago
"Thanks for the gift of jewelry, I'm going to chew on it." Like wtf, are you 5? Not to mention, a lot of metals can make you sick if you ingest them. Jesus.
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u/Additional_Baby_3683 8h ago
Jewellery is meant to be worn and loved in my opinion. It’s a really practical easy to wear piece. Going forward i would avoid chewing it and take a little bit better care (ie. Take it off for swimming, other sports and clean it), specific to gold. Plus be conscious of it being stolen or lost.
It can be easily cleaned and restored by a jeweller and most jewellery needs a some maintenance at some point in its life. I think scratches and wear show a piece’s history. The only exception is pieces that are way too impractical for wear daily wear that come out for special occasions, like big ass cocktail rings or really delicate pieces/stones.
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u/muddymar 8h ago
I wear my gold necklace everywhere and even in the shower it’s pretty resilient if it’s solid. Don’t hide it , wear it but just quit chewing on it. Better for the necklace and your teeth. You might want to have a jeweler check it out first to make sure you haven’t damaged the links to where it could break.
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u/IntrepidBorder8530 9h ago
The only thing that's mildly infuriating is your inability to take responsibility. It doesn't matter if it's gold or not, it's bad for your teeth. It's not on anyone to tell you a gift was expensive or not.
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u/lfcmosalah11 9h ago
Well you could stop chewing on metal regardless. You’re gonna damage your teeth like that and it’s weird. Just take this as a lesson to not treat gifts from people like chew toys and wear that necklace out and about. You now know it’s a little pricey so flaunt it
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u/KraiserX 9h ago
Maybe don't chew on gifts based on how much you think they cost? Or don't eat gold im not your dad
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u/thequeenearth 8h ago
I don’t get why you would chew on it, even if it was a cheaper necklace… maybe stop putting jewelry in your mouth and go for a gum instead
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u/MutantApocalypse 8h ago
Don't chew on jewelry. It's covered in bacteria and will make your breath stink.
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u/GoodQueenFluffenChop 8h ago
This is all on you. Jewelery isn't for chewing. Besides even if it was a cheap metal jewelry that would be still be bad. It would be bad for your teeth and whatever cheap metals you would be ingesting and absorbing.
There things and even "jewelry" made specifically for older children and adults to chew on so you don't wreck your mouth.
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u/THE_GREAT_PICKLE 8h ago
Just enjoy it, even if that means chewing on it. It was a gift, don’t overthink it.
Maybe it’s recency bias, but I have a new perspective on things after having a kid. Stuff is finite and breakable. Just enjoy it while you can. It’s not some trinket you need to keep locked up, it was a gift. You should enjoy it, even if it’s in an unconventional way.
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u/Chemical-Papaya-3101 9h ago
Maybe talk to someone about your chewing issues - putting things in your mouth like this is kind of gross. Its giving Courtney Wheeler.
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u/Meronkulous 9h ago
They didn't say they were mad at or blaming their family y'all just that it's you know, mildly infuriating...
Chill.
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u/Illustrious_Aide_875 8h ago
Idk why ppl are dog pilling on you, you didn’t know it was actual gold, or even know how verify it was actual gold
I got a lot of cheap gifts growing up, sometimes none at all, so I kinda understand you not giving a second thought to gifts after having a sizable sample size of getting normal gifts, and then being surprised with a gold necklace
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u/GelatinousGreenSoul 8h ago
So you are mad that they got you an awesome gift and YOU ruined it? Okaayyyy
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u/Only_Quote_Simpsons 9h ago
I don't think that is a 500 bucks piece, and I don't think chewing it will cause any damage. You are overthinking this.
Just wear it normally and enjoy the gift from your father.
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u/JesseChrist 8h ago
It's so mildly infuriating. I just can't believe I can sit here and eat Daddy's money all day. Like! Omg, this is my truth and it tastes like privilege!
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u/GetALoadOfThisGuyy 8h ago
Jealousy over a teenage girl getting given a necklace from her dad is wilddddd
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u/Mydickisaplant 8h ago
Chewing on gold is psychotic
But chewing fake gold is 100x more psychotic (which you thought you were doing). Fake gold is a coating that would have ended up in your stomach
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u/wafflkittie 8h ago
Kay so a lot of people are getting in your case for chewing on it but as someone with autism I have some advice! Get a cheap, sturdy necklace that you can chew on, that way you can still do it without damaging the gold one. A lot of places that carry autism stimming toys have silicone/rubber toys specifically for oral stimming (aka chewing on things). Not saying you have autism, but just giving some advice from someone that does :3
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u/heckhammer 8h ago
You wear it. That's what it's for. If you want to stop chewing on it you need to do something to either break the habit or get a chewing necklace.
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u/mindguru88 8h ago
No judgement, but this is pretty classic ADHD and or ASD behavior (speaking as someone who had way bad issues with oral fixation at your age.) Might want to speak with a professional about that and/or get yourself some items that are okay to chew. There are items like chewies or necklaces designed for that purpose.
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u/WendigoCrossing 9h ago
One might say you have expensive taste