r/sixwordstories 7h ago

Masculinity isn't toxic. Your agenda is.

10 Upvotes

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22

u/mochitochini 7h ago

Masculinity is leading, nurturing, protecting.

Not selfishness, aggression, oppression and control.

4

u/Elmer_Fudd01 6h ago

Thank you

12

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 7h ago

Masculinity being associated with leading is propaganda

2

u/Giovanabanana 1h ago

Which is why ultimately, masculinity is toxic. It's just a bunch of stereotypes men are supposed to follow. So is femininity.

u/Greedy-Win-4880 39m ago

I dont think masculinity and femininity are toxic, it's all those rigid stereotypes and expectations that are toxic. In reality masculinity and femininity will look different for everyone.

Some things are influenced by things like hormones/biology but not enough for there to be these rigid stereotypes that people feel they have to fit themselves into.

1

u/OneMagician289 6h ago

why

7

u/Exceon 5h ago

Because it implies that it is not masculine to follow others, or have moments of weakness where one might be too tired to lead, for example.

-3

u/philosophyclown 7h ago

How is masculinity being associated with being a good leader propaganda?

17

u/Dddddd92 6h ago

Because leading is not related to one gender. Both men and women can be good leaders.

-10

u/mrkpxx 6h ago

Many women are looking for security; who should provide it for them?

7

u/HunterDramatic8383 5h ago

The women themselves? A lot of women are far more secure without a man in their lives.

5

u/qiyraa 5h ago

Security from WHAT?

-3

u/mrkpxx 5h ago

Ask them!

4

u/qiyraa 5h ago

So you admit you made that up?

0

u/mrkpxx 3h ago

what?

2

u/DeusExLogomachia 6h ago

Anyone who is willing to provide it.

-2

u/mrkpxx 6h ago

Mostly men.

-5

u/mxlplyx2173 6h ago

Like you'd hire security of the women form. 😂

4

u/DeusExLogomachia 6h ago

There are many woman in police and military jobs and you don't need big muscles when you have a pew pew 🤫

-1

u/mxlplyx2173 5h ago

They don't use their pew pew, they run away. At least in the last 62 videos I've watched of police encounters. The shooting at the WHCD was one of the funniest! Go check it out! 😂

7

u/DeusExLogomachia 5h ago

If the 62 hand selected videos for incels said so, then it must be true!

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2

u/Dddddd92 6h ago

Security from what? I think those women should be self sufficient. They are not disabled they are functioning adults

-1

u/mrkpxx 6h ago

A person who values ​​security is not disabled—be mindful of how you talk about women!

0

u/Dddddd92 6h ago

Wtf does "values security" mean? What is security?

Do you think women who have no man in there life are not secure? be mindful of how you talk about women! They are not toddlers

1

u/DeusExLogomachia 6h ago

He is vague on purpose, don't waste your time. Lucky for women to have all these courageous men to protect them from other men... And sharks or whatever.

2

u/Dddddd92 6h ago

He is a german man who undoubtedly does 50/50 coffee dates. Wtf kind of security bro😂

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4

u/Impossible_Still5452 6h ago

Some of the best leaders I've ever had were woman.

I wouldn't describe them as masculine.

1

u/Nvr1toPanic 4h ago

Thank you- Impossible still- I've worked with and for some incredible women. Strength in women impresses me. Not intimidates. No different than strengths in men impresses and doesn't intimidate me.

4

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 6h ago

Because being a good leader has nothing to do with gender and is not an inherently masculine trait

-2

u/Actual-Woodpecker-95 6h ago

It’s a common masculine trait. Not a common trait of women. Generally, Women also like to be led in dating

u/LynnSeattle 44m ago

LOL, no. Dating is a relationship, not an expedition. No leader is necessary.

u/Actual-Woodpecker-95 29m ago

Then why do women appreciate men who plan and lead on dates lol. Why do women appreciate men who take action in stressful situations. Y’all can be as delusional as you want. It’s a fact

u/Nvr1toPanic 10m ago

Thank you Actual-W. That wasn't a hornet nest i was willing to kick. Thank you. Yes many are either delusional or close minded to the concept of reliance on each other's strengths in partnership.

1

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 6h ago

Women are the ones that raise children?

0

u/Actual-Woodpecker-95 6h ago

I’m not arguing that they lead children. Not exactly equivalent to leading adults though

3

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 5h ago

I mean the scientific studies done found that women rate much higher than men in 9/12 of the leadership qualities they tested for, and I tend to trust them over someone on the interest

-1

u/Actual-Woodpecker-95 5h ago

As defined by who

0

u/Nvr1toPanic 2h ago

Imagine, IMAGINE how onesided and sexist that statement is. Not a sole except the OP ...... myself.....commented Men are the breadwinners!!! Hmm. I raised 2 successful daughters and have 2 grandaughters. Oh. Oh yeah. Almost forgot. So did my wife. She also worked.

u/LynnSeattle 43m ago

Sole:Only

Soul:Person

-2

u/mochitochini 7h ago

😮‍💨🙄 then.. say stability, guiding. Whatever tickles your fancy.

3

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 6h ago

None of those things are inherently masculine lol

4

u/November-8485 6h ago

Nor is confidence. Or any other trait. In fact no trait is inherently male or female. But as a society we do have expectations for participation in society and what it is to behave like a good member and a bad member of society.

So yes, it’s ok for good traits to be attributed to what it means to be masculine or feminine.

0

u/Nvr1toPanic 5h ago

Thank you November

5

u/mochitochini 6h ago

Can we please for once not make this a toxic gender war thing? I didn't say it's EXCLUSIVELY to men. I said this is what true masculinity is supposed to be, and not the clownery of wannabe alpha males.

u/LynnSeattle 41m ago

If it’s a trait that’s not exclusive to men, it’s not masculinity.

0

u/Nvr1toPanic 6h ago

Backtracking to "wannabes". Noted

-1

u/mrkpxx 6h ago
  • Protection
  • Resources
  • Humour
  • Social Proof and Status elevation
  • Leadership
  • Physical Strength
  • Fatherhood
  • Emotional Containment
  • Sexual Polarity
  • Discipline and Accountability

2

u/Pleasant-Pop-5184 6h ago

There’s no way you just said humour is a masculine trait. That’s how I know not to take anything you say seriously.

0

u/Nvr1toPanic 5h ago

You're half right. It can be a trait of both.

u/LynnSeattle 39m ago

Other than fatherhood, these are not exclusively masculine attributes.

u/LynnSeattle 42m ago

These are not gendered traits.

-3

u/Big_Psychology_3 6h ago

These are female chauvinists who reject attributing anything positive to masculinity. In their worldview, masculinity has only negative attributes, no positives.

1

u/November-8485 5h ago

That’s a wildly presumptuous over generalization.

2

u/Big_Psychology_3 5h ago

Then tell us - what are some positive traits of masculinity?

2

u/November-8485 5h ago

Action, strength. Realistically they’re positive traits whether belonging to a man or woman.

0

u/CemeteryFieldOps 4h ago

What traits are we talking about? Physical, characteristic, or personality?

1

u/philosophyclown 7h ago

That is toxic masculinity in a nutshell yes. Oppression and violence

-2

u/Big_Psychology_3 6h ago

That’s just toxic Einstein, not toxic “masculinity”. The negative person can be a man or a woman.

4

u/November-8485 5h ago

When one gender has dubbed something masculine, and it’s toxic, it’s reasonable to call it toxic masculinity. Albeit divisive. The same goes for femininity.

1

u/Big_Psychology_3 5h ago

Do you have an example of toxic feminity?

2

u/November-8485 5h ago

Many. Assuming a man would pay for an expensive meal. Not allowing a man to show emotions. Consistently playing the victim.

Update: those traits are toxic period. But society has dubbed some of these feminine and masculine, so we’re operating within that framework. The gender war bullshit needs to stop.

u/Silent-Literature-64 32m ago

Haha that shut him up pretty fast.

2

u/philosophyclown 5h ago

Playing the victim. Gossiping. Spreading lies and rumors. Using sexual favors to persuade and coerce people into doing things against their own well being.

I think these are some traits that exemplify toxic femininity. Men can do these things too. It does not mean a woman can’t be a real victim or talk about other people at all. or express their sexuality at all etc. but I think we all know that there is a line between using these things for good and using these things to do harm. with violence it is usually easier to tell who is the perpetrator. but toxic femininity is more insidious and the perpetrators usually are left off the hook these days

0

u/normal_hombre 6h ago

Protection and control are closely intertwined. In a real world setting there is no difference, a "protective" man will always tell a woman what to do or not do.

-2

u/mxlplyx2173 6h ago

Say that to the people who fight to keep you safe. No aggression please, it's icky! Masculinity needs aggression, strength, and the ability to hurt people. Our good guys have to be all that, more than the bad guys to keep us safe.

1

u/mochitochini 5h ago

I agree. Emotional and physical strength is also incredibly important. But not instability and pointless aggression due to fragile egos or validation, etc. And especially not against their own woman. Being capable of these things as a man, while gentle and loving with your lady is by far the most fulfilling and wonderful feeling i ever experienced myself as a woman.

All the things you mentioned relate to the "protective" part i mentioned. Sadly many get all of this completely wrong

2

u/mxlplyx2173 4h ago

Because they have a plot to upkeep. Show me a woman in an uncomfortable situation and I'll show you a woman who would NOW appreciate masculinity!