Back in the 90s, a teacher gave us a line puzzle to solve, saying that if we could solve it by the end of the year, we'd have a pizza party. You basically have to draw a specific pattern without lefting your pencil or repeating your lines; for ten minutes, everyone tried because pizza party but then everyone got bored. I was obsessed and couldn't let it go; as others were doodling the S or random shapes, I was drawing this half-finished puzzle, always one line away. End of the year, no party.

Years pass and I'd still occasionally try to solve it when it popped into my head; during junior high bio, high school chemistry, college history. There'd always be a ten minute period of remembering, trying a bunch of times before "Fuck it, gotta focus", then forgetting for a few months. Got a job and at least once a year, I'd find myself in a pointless meeting just trying over and over again, the margins of my notepad covered in the design because surely if I just keep trying, I'll unlock it. "If I start with this line-" "Maybe this line-" "If I go this way...". Always the same result, one short and move on. Occasionally I'd mention it to someone else, they'd make a few attempts and get bored.

This morning, I had to be in the office for a monthly meeting, nothing important, just project updates. I got there early because it's better to be earlier than late so I started to make a few attempts. A coworker came in, we made small talk and I mentioned the puzzle, he said it sounds easy to just make a work flow to eliminate all possible paths; told him I've been trying for three decades and it's harder than it seems. He took that as a challenge and makes a few attempts, repeating the same "If I start with this line-". Another coworker comes in, sees both of us drawing a the same shape over and over, asked what we were doing, then trying. Eventually there's eleven grown adults in the meeting room drawing a shape. At one point, someone says they figured it out, we ask how, and they just "I don't remember...I think I-" and then retrying but coming up short.

Someone finally says "We're twenty minutes into the meeting, let's just youtube the solution". There's dozens of videos showing how to solve it but each one breaks one of the rules about not repeating a line. We go to google and one of the top results was a reddit post that called it the impossible line puzzle with all the comments saying that it's mathetmatically an impossible puzzle.

TL;DR; I was given a line puzzle as a kid that I was low key obsessed with solving for over three decades. I've been on the internet since early AOL and didn't once think to look for the answer online; would've learned it was impossible but I just stupid enough to still think I can solve it.

So when i was around 12 (in my 20s now) my mom wanted me to gain some independence and learn to order and get food for us as a family. We lived right beside a shopping centre that had a Walmart with a McDonald’s inside. She had sent me with her card and a list of whatever was wanted, she told me “this is what you need to order word for word and whatever you would like, just come back with my card and the bill. Oh but make sure you tell them to supersize my meal” Supersize? i remember thinking “the fuck is that?” (in canada where we live I had never hear this) never the less, mom said what she said and i’m on my new journey of adult hood. after my treacherous walk of 5 whole minutes where as i walked the whole time i practiced everyone’s orders, feeling so mature and confident. i approached with the up most confidence to this poor clearly young teen boy exhausted from his job “hello welcome to mcdonald’s what can i get you?” “hello..saaa..sir… i would like (said my whole family’s order impeccable if you asked me) and i think that should be everything thank you i’ll pay on card” again him being so unamused went for me to pay but then i remembered my mom’s request, i piped up before he could finish “oh i’m supposed to ask can i “circumcise” that?”

this poor kid held it together with all the might in his body i’m sure and just said “ma’am we idon’t do that here at mcdonald’s” and as the scared little stupid kid i was i didn’t get why he was giggling and i just said “oh okay i’m so sorry” he handed me my food with more laughter. Now as a grown adult i like to think i made this kids day in a strange way but also if i ever see him i’m to going to hide like the little girl i was at that time. In conclusion i fucked up this kids shift or made it..who knows!
Tldr i scared a mcdonald’s employee

(Not today but happened a few days ago and still genuinely haunts me so I needed to share.)

I (23F) recently lost my job and was job hunting. I got an interview for this desk job and I was incredibly excited because it was perfect. The benefits were amazing, it was super close to home, and it was a desk job which was a great change to my customer service job I had before.

I went to the interview nervous as all get out because it was a government job and I was wearing a blazer, pencil skirt, stockings, and ballet flats. I felt so out of place and nervous.

I introduced myself to the front desk guy and apologized for being so early (it was 15 minutes til my interview) which he gave me a weird look and was like “you’re not that early…”

So I’m already on edge.

Then, the interview starts with some folks. I feel pretty decent about the interview but honestly, I’m terrified.
I am rambling and clearly nervous, but I’m trying to stay calm and professional.

The energy in the room though, was pretty decent. They were laughing, vibing with me, I began to feel really good. I think I was really winning them over.
We are almost to the end of the interview when the head of the department asks me a question I didn’t see coming.

“If you could make a TV show about anything, what would it be?”

I think for a moment, saying “oh that’s a good question!”

Then, after a short pause I confidently respond.

“I would have a show where it’s Opossums reenacting stories from classical literature. You know, Romeo and Juliette, The Great Gatsby, etc. and they’d be in little costumes and stuff.”

The room just froze. No one said anything. No one laughed, no one even looked pleased or surprised. They all just stared at me like I had two heads.

After what felt like an eternity (realistically probably only a few seconds), the department head responded to me. She just sort of, hesitantly asked me, “Why is that?”

And I struggled to explain the answer.
“Uh… Well, Opossums are my favourite animal. And I love classical literature. So like, yeah.”

In my head, I felt like I was nailing the casual tone and the like, slightly awkward but kind demeanor people tend to say I have.
But man, this was BAD. Like, the vibes immediately felt awkward and I was just trying so hard to break the silence.

The interview ended after a couple of questions from myself, then they explained what would come next. And I was escorted out.

I genuinely was feeling so good about the interview until that question. THAT QUESTION of all things. I always get a laugh or a giggle when I answer those stupid personality questions. I was proud of my answer! Who wouldn’t want a Wishbone-esque tv show featuring opossums?! (with British accents of course.)

Anyways, Im pretty sure I Bombed that interview now and I’m terrified. Haven’t heard anything back yet but, I’m not optimistic.

TL;DR Job Interviewer asked me what TV show id make if I could make one, I said “Opossums reenacting classical literature”, and immediately killed the vibes 😩

UPDATE: Firstly, genuinely thank you for everyone in the comments. The amount of support I have recieved was very kind. I am glad everyone agrees this is a banger idea for a show. I also appreciate the people helping me see why this might have gotten some weirded out reactions. It’s made me feel a bit less bad and a bit more prepared.

For context, I wanted to add that this was my first job interview in a few years, so it was pretty nerve wracking. I also have never had to wear such a formal outfit for an interview, and felt very out of place as I’d never worked an office job before. This wasn’t any big government job. I’d be just checking papers and files for people in a cubical. So it wasn’t as grandiose as it sounds. But, I digress.

This morning, I got an email from the employer… they want to hire me! I got the job!
I have to go through the background check process and I have a vacation coming up soon, so I won’t be starting for a couple weeks. But I’m genuinely shocked they didn’t completely hate me! Guess it shows how bad at reading people I am lol. Good thing I’m not working a customer service job anymore 🥴🥴🥴

Also, I’m not AI but I appreciate yall being skeptical. AI will never replace pure human cringe, let it be known today!

I love dogs and cats, especially ones spotted during my daily routine. Whenever I see a cat in the window of a home I stop and take a picture because I think it’s the cutest thing ever. So far I’ve gotten a bit of a collection going, and my plan was to eventually post my collection on Reddit for all to enjoy.

Until this morning. The neighbor’s calico cat was in the window and after spotting it, I went up to the building, whipped out my smartphone, and snapped a picture. But in my excitement of capturing the cat pic for my collection I didn’t notice there was a woman standing behind the cat. Lowering my phone, I then saw her from behind the glare of the glass. We made eye contact briefly, her inside her own home and me standing outside, and now I don’t know what to do because if I try to explain it it’ll make it more weird and awkward.

Adding insult to injury, my neighborly relationship with this woman was already testy and precarious because whenever she walks her dog I’ve been chummy and said hi while walking my dog as well, and I suspect this was probably misconstrued as hitting on her. And I suspect she is suspicious of seeing me outside her front street all the time even though it’s only because we’re next door neighbors. Like I have to emphasize this couldn’t have happened between me and a worse individual. And now I don’t even want to see how this calico cat photo came out.

Tl;dr Saw a cat in a window, took a picture, didn’t notice a woman behind the cat, so now I’m some sort of peeping tom.

My daughter, 7, loves Minecraft, and needs help making an apology gift for a friend at school who also loves Minecraft. So, as any good mother with autism, ADHD and a wild collection of crafts, I agreed to make a green Minecraft slime. I intended to use polymer clay for the inside and resin for the outside.

To make it a little extra special, I decided to use some of my glow in the dark pigment in the resin. Now, this should have been the moment I questioned my idea because this isn't just ANY glue in the dark pigment. It's Stuart Semple's, neon green LIT, the worlds strongest glow in the dark pigment. As I sprinkled a small amount into the resin, I noticed it accidentally spilled on the table. I quickly use my hand to wipe it away, but it smears. What follows was about 3 hours of the same issue happening over and over as I try to gradually later this resin and cure it to avoid bubbles and uncured resin. Once finished, it was already late at night and my husband, who needs to be up early, is already in bed asleep.

I clean up, then head upstairs to bed with my dog. I quietly walk in the room and get into bed, avoiding waking my sleeping husband. I get comfortable and call the dog (a small dachshund mix) to come and settle next to me as normal, so she can get pets until we fall asleep. However, it's only then do I realize my hands and fingernails are now glowing in such a freakish way, that my dog suddenly sees this bright object heading towards her from under the blanket and she loses her damn mind. She immediately jumps back, circles the parameter of the bed and seeks the safety of my husband as a physical barrier from what she can only perceive as doggy demons or "the claw". I try to comfort her by slowly getting closer to pet her and show it's ok, but this turned out to be the worst possible thing I could have done. Within a split second, fearing that she was being cornered by two terrifying hell creatures, the dog does what can only be described as a weenie wiggle of death, over my sleeping husband and directly into his face. Where she then uses his face to kangaroo kick as fast as she can away from me. Unfortunately this resulted in her not only flying off the bed in the dark, but running head first into the wall.

My husband wakes up, his face hurts and he doesn't know why and our dog is now under the bed, likely also with a face that hurts.

TL;DR: I got ultra strong glow in the dark pigment on my hands, went to bed, my dog freaked out and ninja kicked my sleeping husband in the face and probably gave herself a concussion.

So my best friend and I have been through everything together. We met when I was a sophmore and they were a freshman (in high school). We’ve been best friends since then, I’m now almost 23 and they JUST turned 21 on the 29th.

So I plan the best birthday trip I can for them. We gather two other friends with us to stay at an airbnb in nashville. Our big plan was to go to Play, a club, the night of Riley’s (my best friend) birthday. We pregame quite a bit before we take our lyft to the clurb. But tbh I’m more of a smoker, and I still don’t know how to drink responsibly. So we go out, everything is fine, then I take one more shot in the bathroom at the club and instantly I am in another world. I don’t really remember much after that shooter, except for the fact that I was stuck in the bathroom throwing up and shitting intermittently. Apparently I was in there for 30 minutes until Riley gets me up and pulls my tights up. We then left the club not even 3 hours in.

I don’t remember much, mostly because I feel like I wasn’t conscious. But as soon as I get in the bed after Riley changes my clothes I start crying and whining “i’m so sorry” and “i ruined your birthday.” it all hit me what i had done. The morning after I immediately apologized to everybody, firstly Riley. Grace, one of the friends, said they were all getting sleepy at that time last night anyways. Riley told me their feet were hurting too, from the new unbroken boots they had just bought for the night out. But idk. I ruined everybody’s night.

I have no idea how to make it up to Riley. They said they still had the best birthday ever but I can’t shake the feeling that I ruined everything because of my simple stupidity.

TLDR
I got way too fucked up at the clurb and my bestie had to take us home early on their 21st bday.

Actually happened today!

I work as a teacher at a technical college. Today we were talking about pneumatic control systems, focusing on pressure calculations in different parts of the system. The subject of fluid flow came up. In order for fluid to flow from one part of a system to another there has to be a pressure difference, also known as Delta P.

Thinking I was smart, I decided to show them the Delta P video. You already know the one. It's about 10 minutes long and talks about how not to get sucked into an opening underwater. Halfway through the video there's a part when a crab gets sucked into an underwater pipe. That video. You've seen it, right? Right.

So anyway, I went to youtube and searched for Delta P. I saw the thumbnail I remember and clicked on it. The video started normally, though I did notice the naration was a little off. I thought maybe it just wasn't as good as I thought.

Suddenly the video started talking about "your girlfriend" and "average depths and lengths". I knew something was wrong. I skipped ahead to the crab part, hoping to avoid any more trouble. Big mistake. The narrator explained that pressure differences can cause suction. The crab moved over the hole in the pipe and disappeared. At that point the narrator proceeded to colorfully explain that the crab got sucked into "the phantom zone" and would not return.

The class was DYING laughing. I was dying of embarrassment.

TL;DR: I accidentally showed my class the parody safety video instead of the real one. The offending video can be found here: https://youtu.be/K1yUchFNdIk?is=LazbVwkdCh8JcGpN

Today I had a doctors follow-up appointment. I’d been treated for some bowel issues. This visit was just to check if everything was back to normal. I said, "Yeah everything’s normal."Then he asked me to describe what my normal actually is. So I did... He gave me this really skeptical look and said, "That doesn’t sound normal at all."

I was confused. I’ve always felt this way. It’s how I’ve been since I was little so I never even thought to question it. He told me to start tracking things. See if certain foods made it worse or better. Okay fine. No big deal. I’ll do that.

Then he asked if there was anything else. That’s when I remembered the pain or weird feeling near my sternum. I mentioned it wondering if it could be connected. He gave me a look and asked how long I’d had it. I said about two years. But because I sleep on my side and my shoulders collapse forward (I have hypermobility) I just figured it was, from that.

Turns out the spot I was pointing to? That’s where the stomach is. I don’t know why but somehow I never really thought about where my stomach actually sits?

He said yes, it could be related. Or it’s just reflux. If acid reducers don’t help I’ll need to come back in. Then he said that looking at everything: the bowel issues and the chest discomfort and my history it would probably be a good idea to get a gastroscopy and a colonoscopy done.

TL;DR: I thought that what I had called a "quirk of my body" was just a small oddity but it turns out it might be a health issue that needs to be looked into.

This happened several years ago but a question on [r/morbid](r/morbid)questions just reminded me.

A few years ago I was dating a PhD student at UC Berkeley from South Korea.

Our typical routine was to hangout for the night after she finished whatever 14 pages of something she had write then we’d spoon together (nude, this is important) until we fell asleep.

One night before going to bed I noticed she applied some cream to her lower back and I thought it was just lotion or something and thought nothing of it. Then 30 seconds into cuddling I feel like fire ants and biting my dick.

I jump out of bed to see what happened and it’s getting worse when I asked her what she put on her back which she explained was a Korean brand equivalent of capsaicin aka the active ingredient in chili peppers as it was an excellent pain reliever.

TLDR: My ex gf applied capsaicin to her lower back and I thought it was lotion and when I went to cuddle her my dick felt like I was being bitten by fire ants.

Ok, this is a little silly, but It’s been about 2 months now and I still feel like I fucked something up and can’t get it back.

So I (F early 20’s) made friends with an older gentlemen (M mid to late 40s-50s) last year and would occasionally message each other on Instagram/facebook. Nothing too crazy, mostly he would congratulate me on my recent accomplishments and send me some advice if I needed it which I always took to heart and appreciated. To me, he’s like a father figure and always had my back like a supportive parent would.

We have mutual friends who I’m really close with and they were hosting a party, so I went over to Instagram and asked if he was going to be there since he was invited. I also threw in “also at this point we should exchange contact info” at the end, since I thought it was a little silly not to have each others contact info at this point since we’ve known each other for a while now. He saw that message, but never responded.

It’s been two months now and I really feel like I fucked up and ruined a friendship over one text even though there was nothing nefarious or bad behind what I said. I worry he took it the wrong way and took it to mean something I didn’t intend at all. (Background info: he’s got a wife and a bunch of kids) so it could’ve been interpreted that I wanted a romantic relationship, but even writing that down let alone thinking about it makes me want to hurl. Idk Reddit, what do you think?

TL;DR: TIFU by texting an older friend that we should exchange contact info, and now he hasn’t spoken to me in two months.

I was texting my friend about someone I had been talking to for a couple of weeks. Nothing serious, but I had started liking them, so naturally my friend and I were analyzing every single message like we were detectives.They sent me a message that was slightly confusing, so I screenshotted it and sent it to my friend with: “What do you think they mean by this?”

Except I didn't send it to my friend.I sent it straight back to the person I was talking about.I realized it maybe two seconds later.

I immediately followed it with “HAHAHAHA WRONG CHAT” which somehow made everything 10 times worse.They replied: “So… you were talking about me?”I stared at my phone for about five minutes before responding.

I ended up admitting that yes, I was talking about them.

They actually thought it was funny and said they were curious what my friend had to say. So I had to explain the entire conversation.The worst part? My friend’s analysis was basically: “They probably don't like you that much.”And yes, they saw that too.

We're still talking, but I will never emotionally recover from that screenshot.

TL;DR: I accidentally sent the person I was talking about a screenshot of our conversation about them. They saw everything, including my friend saying they probably didn’t like me.

Wife and I got married back in November, and have been planning our Korea/Japan honeymoon for months. One of the most important aspects of the trip comes during our Japan leg, where I bought tickets to a baseball game (Yomiuri Giants vs Hanshin Tigers) at the Tokyo Dome on the 12th of September. I bought these tickets for us and two other friends who live in Tokyo, and it's supposed to be one of the highlights of the trip.

I was expressly in charge of these tickets, and I left them behind in the US. And not only did I leave them behind, but we had our roommate turn our apartment upside down and they are nowhere to be found, so they can't mail the tickets to us in time for the game. It's like they disappeared off the face of the earth.

So now my wife is is going through various cycles of grief. My friends are seemingly cool about it but I know I let them down. And this threatens to hang over our heads for the whole trip.

TL;DR: lost an important part of our honeymoon behind. Now the wife is mad and the boys are sad.

Wasn’t necessarily today… For years I’d find my dog in my room sitting by the air purifier. I always thought it was just a cool place that he found that had a calming breeze from the fan. He didn’t always sit by it, he’d have stretches where it was his “go to” place. I hadn’t seen him by it in a while, which I didn’t notice until I had thrown a new plugin air freshener in downstairs. Hadn’t had an air freshener in for several months because I had been using more candles, but as soon as I plugged a new one in I found him by the air purifier and it dawned on me that the freshener must be bothering his powerful nose! Immediately unplugged it and haven’t seen him by the purifier since.

Devastated me to realize all this time he was avoiding the main floor to get away from the scent…

TL:DR dog hates the smell of a plug in air freshener and has been sitting by the air purifier for years

I dont know if I should even be saying this stuff on social media but I dont know where else to turn to when I want some real world advice, opinions or hear about people that have gone through something like this. I might yap a lot of bear with me ya'll

So I am an alevel kid and I went to this revision class. The institute is something I am familiar with but its stupid bathroom isnt. And well, as embarrassing as this is, the second I got there i wanted to go to the washroom. Like it was an emergency and I had to stay in that class for hours so I wanted to get it overwith. All my friends were upstairs already cause I was a bit late so I thought well its not that big a deal so might as well go alone and come back as quickly as possible. And again this was my first time going to the washroom. I just realised then and there that its just one washroom, one stall for both girls guys men and women. And I had to relieve myself and it was sort of spacious and it lowkey stank. But I was like f those standards I am going. It was relatively spacious and clean? sorry for yapping yall. And while I was about to wash myself and get back up, I heard someone stomp in the bathrooms direction. I didn't care but what i didnt know was that the lock of the door was broken. And of course. A guy barged in like it was his birth right. And all I could say was excuse me. And I dont know what he saw or how long he looked for but he said sorry like three times and got out. I dont know if this isnt a big deal for whoever is reading this but god help me it was for me. I could literally faint. And then I got dressed and came out to see him standing a good distance away awaiting his turn. I didnt look back again and I automatically ran outside.

Maybe that was a bad idea. But as you can see I am not the best at decision making. And during the interval I was afraid I was going to meet him but thankfully I didn't. But I did avoid going outside and told my one of my friends that something embarrassing happened and that I dont want to see that person. But I went anyway. Didnt see him. After the class ended, I went outside again hoping he wasn't there because he is not in the same class as me and kids of that class were nowhere to be found. He had a different revision class meaning I will see him again and again. And the kids from that class were not around all except for him. And he came outside where I was taking a call and I looked because I saw a flash of his tshirt and he looked at me too. Not a glance. He looked looked. Like you know, with intent. And I didnt look. I again automatically covered the side of my face and went inside. He came inside too with a bunch of his friends, who were all from my class. And I just knew he came but didnt look. He went past me and didnt look.

Now, I had my jeans upto my thighs and the tshirt upto the top of my thighs but I was still sitting like a normal person does on a commode because I did not expect someone to walk in on me. Its possible he saw at least the dark spot of whatever is between my legs and the top of my thighs. Or even worse, more. But he definitely saw my thighs. And that is very private. That is too much for a stranger. And he could have told his friends. The friends in question are from my class. You never know what guys are like. Well I have literally no idea. Like I think they tell each other this stuff? Like they even pee together. And they dont care as much as we do. If he does tell others, then it will spread and spread until people I know know too. I am pretty known around these schools so it isnt that a small matter to me. Like even if people dont know me, if somebody makes a reference its easy to know its me they are talking about, easy to connect it to me. God knows I dont want that because I am also a girl thats still in school. But if hes an okay sort of guy and didnt tell, its okay except ill live with the fact that he has seen me half naked.

Why couldnt I have gotten up a few minutes ago? Oh god but I didnt. So yeah I told my parents and they are like yeah thats plenty embarrassing but move on. Because there is nothing else you can do. And I was going to deny any allegations. Or murder him. Or plan my route and walk in on him in return because the biggest problem here isnt that I was an idiot for going to that kind of a washroom alone where I could have been harassed even or that I didnt go to a better washroom. Its the simple fact that a guy saw me naked. One that has lowkey been eyeing me, lowkey. Because I was pretty sure if I wanted to go to one in a cafe or something nearby I had to buy something. And its again embarrassing and time consuming. But I cant predict the future because i am not Alice Cullen.

And he comes to this other institute i have been going to for classes and I have seen him stare every time I pass by. People look but he looks again, with intent. Not glancing. Looking looking. And the fact that thats the guy that barged in. Oh god. And that i have to see him in two places twice a week...I can gaslight myself into thinking this didnt happen but damn I am human and I am a teen and this is super embarrassing for me. All I can think of is this and even objectvely, like minus the overthinking this is embarrassing. And this isnt even the type of stuff that happens to modern family characters so it isnt even relatable. Aahhh

So give me your opinions, comments and advice or real life situations like this. Anything that helps. Or doesnt. Bully me if you want lol. I have been somewhere worse.

TL; DR: I went to a washroom alone and didnt know there was a broken lock until a guy barged in

I believe in Reddit to keep everyone's real identity still secret and it's support on an anonymity. So, I'm 17 and I lived in Malaysia. So, in my situation right now that my art school teacher (who is I'm feel SO IRRITATED by her behaviour. Where she's always like to shouting at peoples even for a small things) She demands us (who take an art subject as their elective) to send our assignments to her at 28 August. But because there's so many students doesn't send their assignments at the times (including me) She changed the deadline's date at 4 September, Friday, where it's still holiday due to Malaysia's National Day and it's 1 week break. But, the situations I'm right my assignment is around 80% finished (not included the final result) I'm always to said to myself to do it later because I thought I still have a times to do it. I don't know but, I think I'm kinda lazy. Even I'm already want to it later like ten minutes but I'm always ended up on my bed and playing with my phone. If I don't do my assignment, she will put TH (Which is meant "Tidak Hadir" where it's like an F result but it's more worse) on the students' their SPM results, to who doesn't do their assignments. I want to do it but I can't bring myself to do it.

TL;DR: So, the deadline is due but I don't know what to do right now. Well, I have a plan tho. If I'm failed an art subject in high school. Malaysian should prepared themselves to witnessing of greatness about of the first NSFW artist in Malaysia is about to born. ( I think. Because, I don't know if there are an NSFW artists in Malaysia.)

My parents gave me an $100 gift card in 2024 from our bank (but it’s a Visa gift card). I have a wallet that just had gift cards in it but I’ve not been wearing my super big purses so I haven’t had it actually in my purse for at least a year. I’ve been going through and decluttering my wardrobe and I got to purses today. I saw the gift card wallet and wondered what was in there and found the gift card still in its holder from when I got it. It said that it had to be registered online so I did that and found out that there’s a $5 inactivity fee for each month after 12 months of not using it so now the card only has $30 of the original $100 on it. So I’ve now wasted $70 of my parents money that either my bank or VISA has reaped without actually buying anything. I didn’t even think inactivity fees were a thing anymore but apparently they are.
TLDR: didn’t know inactivity fees on gift cards were still a thing. Lost $70 of an $100 gift card because of it.

I had heard of a prickly pear, but it was under the name indian fig where I bought it (Lidl). Never had it before, but I thought it looked weirdly familiar and interesting so I decided to buy it. Handled it normally like any fruit, peeled and ate it.

Why did I not look this shit up before touching it, because I learned too late that even a fruit cleared of visible thorns still has tiny microscopic needles called glochids, apparently.

Now my hands feel like a dozen microscopic pieces of glass are stuck in my skin, it is maddening. I've been digging in my skin with tweezers, needle, tried the sticky tape method, but they still keep popping up in a new place every time, I've been playing whack-a-mole for the past hour and I am going to go insane.

Why the fuck is this thing even called a "fig", that is the most misleading name ever, it is nothing like a fig in it's looks or flavor. And it causes pain and suffering even if you can't see it. It's like they want people to suffer. 😭

TL;DR: Me eat prickly pear, and prickly pear did a mini poke-poke, now it ouchy boo-boo and I go coo-coo.

Edit: Tried some more of your suggested tips, including heating up tape and also soaking in hot water, and seems to have worked. Thank you all, even if I don't reply individually. 🥹

So it’s 6 am and I’m up early and decide to order Starbucks. This place is 10 minutes away but I’m currently sick right now so i decide to treat myself as I’m hungry and sick. I haven’t had Starbucks in over a year due to boycott but it’s pumpkin spice season so I caved I order my pumpkin spiced latte with my falafel hot pocket wrap and Siracha on the side. I tipped really well, $5.55 because angel numbers, and it was 10 minutes away from me so I do consider that a good tip. 1.2 miles to be exact. Well, no one picks up my order, 40 minutes go by, still no one does. I contact DoorDash support, they ask if i want to cancel my order, I say no, they reimburse me an extra $10 for convenience.. i feel AMAZING because that means half my meal is free. Well. I should’ve cancelled it. My Starbucks gets here, coffee is cold, hot pocket wrap, not heated enough. I wasn’t so happy. I have some of my coffee, then get onto my falafel pocket wrap. I decide I can only eat this with Siracha. I grab the packet and it’s hard to open, super hard to open. Instead of grabbing a kitchen scissor, I tried to open my Starbucks Siracha packet for my falafel hot pocket wrap with my fingers, as I kept tugging for it to open, it ended up squirting into my eye, and a lot went on my shirt, so the amount that went into my eye was a lot if Siracha also got on my shirt, my eye immediately burned and still hurts. Happened an hour ago. I feel like shit and there were signs to not go through with this order. I don’t know if my rinsed my eye well enough either but my point is if things are being boycotted don’t switch up that’s probably MY karma. Anyway now I’m going schizophrenic and scaring myself thinking I’ll go blind or suffer or something

TLDR: went against morals, ordered Starbucks, got Siracha in eye due to packet squirting, I struggled opening it due to my acrylic nails, don’t be a lazy POS like me and just grab the scissors

Obligatory, happened this weekend. My (40sF) parents went down to the Cape this weekend and asked me to watch their dog Molly from Friday afternoon to Sunday early evening. I usually watch Molly for them at my home when they go out of town or are going to be out of the house for several hours. Molly LOVES being outside, she loves going on walks and will basically do whatever she can to extend those walks. If I'm not in any rush, I don't mind the longer walks as they're good exercise for my fat ass lol.

Well, I should've known better this weekend. Ragweed season is starting, and I exposed myself way too much to the outdoors this weekend and by Sunday afternoon I was starting to feel itchy eyes, runny nose and sneezing. My throat was sore too. My parents picked up Molly yesterday at around 4:30/5 pm. I took Benedryl last night before bed, hoping to lessen the allergy symptoms. It didn't.

I'm realizing I've made this same mistake before -- get allergies, take Benedryl, and wake up the next day feeling like I've got a full-blown cold. I had to call out sick today, which I was so embarrassed to do because I had asked for Friday off to attend a funeral. My throat feels worse, nose is crazy runny, and I barely slept last night. It finally occurred to me to Google why I get worse after taking an antihistamine. Basically Benedryl/diphenhydramine is a first-generation antihistamine that dries out your mucus membranes throughout your entire body and that's why you could end up feeling worse. I'm an idiot for thinking "I'll be fine" as I swallowed that fucking benedryl last night. No. I'm not fine. FML.

TL;DR - exposed myself all weekend to known allergens and made it all worse by taking benedryl and feeling SICKER (a mistake I've made before)

I‘m on vacation but am the lead of a project and since there was an important call going on with 3 of my most trusted project members and 1 head of, I joined the call to listen in.

I was walking around in a forest with my son and I needed to pee - so naturally did so. What I didn’t see is that I had turned on my camera while putting my phone on the floor.

One of my colleagues kicked me out asap but still they were able to see my tushy. Me peeing. From below. The angle is just MORTIFYING.

The one who kicked me out is a really good friend and told me no one laughed or commented on the episode. I later came back to the meeting, made some comments like it was nothing, and that’s it. The call wasn’t recorded, so there’s that.

If it was just the girls I wouldn’t be half as mortified, but I‘m dying inside because of the 2 guys.

Please give me reinsurance that I‘ll survive this horrible accident.

(Thank goodness this happened in Germany with all german colleagues-other cultures would be so much worse. I feel germans are extremely matter-of-factly and care less about this kind of stuff)

TL;DR
Peed in the forest while in a call with my camera on and the angle from below

There's a coffee shop I used to frequent that I really liked going to until I made things awkward by asking out the same girl twice.

What happened was I was a regular there and this other girl was a regular there as well. So I figured we had similar interests, so I asked her out, to which she politely declined.

Then life goes by, I get busy traveling, and I come back and decide to go back to the coffee shop. But this time the girl is looking me as if she's interested because I displayed interest. She looks familiar but for some reason I cannot for the life of me remember where I know her from. So I walk up to her, ask her if we know each other. She frowns immediately and says I asked her out once.

Now I'm an asshole and I can't go back to my favorite coffee shop because whenever I see her things are awkward and she is super pissed off.

tl;dr Approached the same girl twice hitting on her and didn't remember her from the first time, now things are awkward between us at a mutual coffee shop.

I was on a work call that had been going on for almost an hour, and at this point, my brain had completely checked out. Everyone was discussing something that could have easily been an email.

I was sure I had muted myself, so I started quietly complaining to my roommate about the meeting. I whispered, “I swear, if someone says ‘circle back’ one more time, I’m going to throw my laptop out the window.”My roommate started laughing, which made me laugh too. Then I heard someone on the call say, “You know we can hear you, right?”

My soul immediately left my body.

I checked my screen.

The microphone icon was ON.

Not only had everyone heard me, but apparently I had been complaining for almost two minutes. My manager calmly said, “Since you have some thoughts, would you like to share them with everyone?” I wanted the Wi-Fi to disconnect. Instead, I gave the most awkward explanation imaginable.

“Sorry… I thought I was muted.”

There was complete silence.

Then one coworker started laughing, and suddenly everyone else did too. Now whenever I join a meeting, my coworkers say, “Don’t forget to mute yourself.” I will never recover. 💀

TL:DR I complained about a boring work meeting while thinking my microphone was muted, but everyone on the call could hear me. Always double-check that you're actually muted before saying anything you wouldn't want your boss or coworkers to hear. Never trust the mute button blindly. 😭

Im just a lady trying to make a jerk marinade for the first time, and i cut up some habaenaro. Didn't think to put on gloves. Had to touch the blended marinade while finagling the chicken. Now my hands are on FIRE. ive tried milk bath, shower, oil, dishsoap, baking soda, aquapher, ice bath, ect. Its under my nails, under my skin, in my SOUL.

I even tried just taking a nap and sleeping through it, the burning woke me up an hr later. Its been 3 hrs now. This better be the best chicken I've had in my life

I have a dnd session tonight at my house too and need to finish cleaning wtff

If anyone has any ideas I'll try em. Cause nothing is helping lol

Im trying to tell myself the burning is enjoyable at this point, mind of matter vibes i guess?

TL:DR Was an idiot who made marinade with habaenaro and ended up touching it with bare hands

There’s been a lot of drama surrounding my cousins wedding. I love my cousin dearly and his wife, so I did my best to ignore my cousins sisters (who planned this wedding) micro-attempts at alienating our side of the family (our dads are brothers)
One of my uncles forgoed his hernia operation to pay for this wedding and invited my cousin over so they could welcome his wife properly. My cousin came FOUR HOURS late because he was shopping. In literally any culture, but especially ours, any invitation is a commitment and being THAT late is super rude. He and his sister have a history of being kinda rude with our dads side of the family so uh yeah
When my cousin finally did show up, I was a bit cold because this is just rude. Then, he put his foot up on the table and I was kinda annoyed bc he was blocking a narrow path out of the room so I did rudely ask him to put it down.
Him: why are you so cranky??
Me: I’m not (clearly I am) but can you just put your foot down
My dad misreads the situation and thinks I’m mad because my cousin didn’t acknowledge me but acknowledged everyone else and runs defense for
Me. They start fighting and my cousin starts cursing and my dad feels disrespected so the fight quickly spirals. I’m not in the room when this happens but when I come back my mom is screaming at me asking what I did and I feel overwhelmed and start to dissociate. No I’m not using TikTok psychology terms, I genuinely do. My mom slaps me and cries that she was a failure at raising me.
My cousins sister, who is also pregnant, starts crying about how I’ve been kinda mean to her this whole trip and she’s heard lots of stuff about me and she and her brother have always treated us all like actual siblings. Maybe, but they also ignore us when their mom’s side of the family comes along, kinda excluded us at each of their weddings, and much more. I don’t argue with her because she’s pregnant and I don’t want something bad to happen. As for being mean? I’d just joke about how she won’t speak to me (she doesn’t unless I talk
To her first and that’s not how relationships work) and I’d kinda ignore her because I’m mad about the exclusion shit.
Since I’m still dissociating I don’t rly register much and my cousin who the fight started with asks why I’m so angry (I’m not I’m just sitting there staring at the wall) and then pulls me aside in a room and I spill the beans about everything that’s happened at the wedding. He says he had no idea anything happened and I should’ve come to him but like his mom is one of RHOSE boy moms and refused to let him marry his wife for years so um I didn’t wanan ruin that but I guess I did. My dad’s side of the family has been pretty cruel and sociopathic since I was a kid and I always fall for it when they’re kind so this reckoning was bound to happen really
Anyways we come out of the room and we’re all chill and my dads oldest brother (father of pregnant cousin and the newlywed cousin) keeps trying to cheer me up and says he knows I’m a good kid and I don’t argue but clearly I’m not a good kid. My dad’s sister defends me at first but then changes her tune by saying that m and my dad are immature and just don’t know what we’re doing. My newlywed cousin takes full responsibility for the fight saying that he shouldn’t have gotten so angry at everyone anddddd yeah.
However, everyone takes the opportunity to pile on my dad and keeps saying he’s immature and short tempered. In a south Asian family, you get to talk shit and abuse each other but maintain ties of kinship just for being family. I don’t believe in that shit so I blow up at perceived injustices. What I did was pretty immature though and I bet my new sister in law hates me now, which is sad cuz I rly thought I got a new sister in her
:(((
I’m also now being accused of harboring incestuous feelings toward my cousin by my father soooo yay!

TLDR; TIFU by being rude to my cousin and his sister because rhey excluded my family from wedding festivities in whichever way they could without being called out and my cousins in general are disrespectful to my father