I need some help. I've been wearing the same clothes for 6 years, and haven't bought anything new in 4 years. I wanted to get a fresh look. I've been watching this J-drama and fell in love with one of the characters' outfits. The outfits all have tops that are high-neck and long-sleeved, with non-form-fitting ankle-length skirts. I tried to grab as many shots of her outfits as I've seen so far. It's a must for the skirts to be ankle-length and for the tops to be long-sleeved, high-neck. Thank you for your help.

Im kinda fed up. I wear full coverage hijab but it always makes me feel choked and i cant talk as freely as when theres no pressure on my neck. I also think i look better when my neck is showing. Its also much easier to handle. I wanna show my neck but i dont wanna get sins so i keep this desire inside me. But i genuinely have started thinking about it these past few days a LOT. Every good outfit i picture in my mind only looks good when the neck is showing with hijab. And i hate the pressure on my neck like i literally cant talk normally. I dont even wrap the hijab that tight. I just wish showing the neck was halal cause it would make hijab so much easier. I try to refrain for the sake of Allah, and I’m also scared that if i start doing it i’ll eventually remove the hijab gradually which i dont want to do.

EDIT: IM SO SORRY ABOUT MY COMMENT I DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT

I could have a low taper fade and nobody would know

Hello!

First off, my sincere apologies if this question comes off as weird or rude, I’ve been super curious about it for months and wanted to ask Muslim women directly so I can get the most holistic/accurate insight. I mean absolutely no disrespect and am truly just so curious if this is a phenomenon or I’m just stumbling on a charming coincidence!

I am not personally Muslim, but I live in a part of America with a very big Muslim population, and I recently started frequenting TJ Maxx and have noticed a super curious trend: most of the shoppers are hijabi women! Like, at LEAST 75% of shoppers. This is not just the case in one or two instances, but every time I go and at every location I’ve been to in neighboring cities. It’s women of all ages, any day of the week, any time I go, and when I go into neighboring stores with similar items (the ones I go to most frequently are next to dollar stores/Five Below, a thrift store, a grocery store, a Kohl’s, etc) the shoppers there reflect a more common ratio of hijabi women I’d usually see — my area has a large Muslim population as mentioned, but the overall majority of the population is white or black, so I generally expect to only see, for instance, 2-3 hijabi women in a store of 20 people. Also, these ladies generally are shopping alone or with one other woman, so I don’t think I’m just encountering a couple friend groups on regular outings.

I asked my Muslim (man) coworker and he said he had no idea, but that his wife does love shopping at TJ Maxx as well, haha.

Anyone have any insight on this? For extra context, in case anyone has never been to a TJ Maxx, it’s a kind of boutique-y department store that mostly focuses on stocking nice name-brand clothes for pretty reasonable prices, but also carries all manner of housewares, makeup, hair and skincare, snacks, perfumes, etc.

Please let me know if I can clarify anything and thank you in advance for your responses!

So, today was my first day of being a hijabi. I wore it for school. I LITERALLT had the worst mental breakdown ever before leaving and I literally had to go to school late cuz I didn’t wanna go. I hate it so much. I literally want to hang myself with it. It hasn’t even been a week and I think I’m gonna take it off. I kept having anxiety attacks in the middle of the skl, and it was even worse cuz it was my first day in a new school. All day long I kept staring at all the beautiful girls with their hair styles and done nicely, while I looked like an ogre who crawled from a swamp. I hate it so much I wish I never wore it. Idk what to do.

Hey!

I’m referring to like doing hairstyles. I work 4 days of the week, but I want to start doing hairstyles at home. I have curly hair and there’s some cute hairstyles. I usually just leave it down at home, but I want to get into the habit of beautifying it at home. How do I start?

Im just really curious since this has been on my mind lately. (Mainly cuz of the shading. It really has been ruining my peace) I dont wanna ask Gemini since they tend to have mixed opinions on me. I love drawing! And its especially hard for me since Im also an animator. (Im starting to think that's worse cuz the characters basically moving. Even though animation is pretty much an illusion). I wanna hear different opinions cuz let's be honest, we act as if theres been ONE clear answer. Well, there never was. (I dont wanna post this on r/Islam since I fear critism since Im VERY sensitive. Also, no IslamQA pls. That website nearly ruined my spiritual relationship with God after hearing their "covering the face and hands is obligatory for women" rule. I dont wanna force myself to become Niqabi at this age)

As Salam Alaikum

I have severe OCD, and while it affects many areas of my life, the one thing I don't want it to ruin is my worship and prayer.

Before salah, I spend a lot of time trying to figure out the exact qiblah direction, often checking it repeatedly because I'm afraid I might be wrong. Then I worry about whether a strand of hair is showing, whether any skin is exposed, whether my feet or hands are covered properly, and countless other details.

During prayer, I sometimes restart because I think I did something "wrong." For example, if my mouth was open before saying "Allahu Akbar," I feel like that isn't part of salah, so I start over. Sometimes I become confused about whether I performed one sujood or two. Other times, when getting up from sujood, I start analyzing exactly how I pushed myself up, whether my hands were folded, spread out, or whether I used my knuckles, and then I either perform sujood as-sahw or repeat the prayer entirely.

Wudhu is also difficult. If I accidentally do something extra or feel uncertain about whether I washed a part correctly, I often feel compelled to start all over again.

It's becoming exhausting. Salah is fard, and I love worshipping Allah, but I don't want prayer to become something that feels unbearable because of these constant doubts.

I also struggle when the adhan is called. I feel guilty doing anything else afterward, even though there is still plenty of time before the prayer time ends. If I send a message, make a phone call, or continue a task, I become terrified that Allah will be angry with me. Sometimes I even worry that because the message remains stored in someone's phone or appears in a call log, Allah will continue punishing me for delaying prayer and will never forgive me.

I know some of these thoughts probably sound irrational, but they feel very real to me. I can't currently afford therapy, so I'm looking for advice from anyone who has dealt with religious OCD/scrupulosity or similar experiences or an Islamic expert.

How do I cope with these doubts? How can I stop restarting everything? And does Allah forgive someone who is struggling with OCD like this?

i know nobody can truly answer this question but i just need some clarity or some insight.

im young, i was born muslim, ive always believed in islam and Allah, but never have i truly practiced my faith.

i never prayed correctly, nor consistently. as a child i was kind of praying by default, because my parents told me to, and as i grew up i just stopped altogether. i never fasted properly. i never covered my hair or made an effort to wear very modest clothing. i curse, i smoke, ive drank, i eat pork, i commit minor sins nearly every 5 seconds. i forget to say bismillah before i eat or drink, i find myself eating with my left hand often.

ive altered my appearance, i wear perfume, i wear makeup, ive stolen, the list can go on forever.

i have a christian boyfriend who respects my religion, no i did not meet him in a halal manner, yes we are physical with each other.

i know im a sinner. and i also know that the only thing i have in my heart are good intentions. i know that alongside my sins i am a genuine person and i am so full of love and generosity. i fear Allah, i fear the day of judgement.

and i know what everyone will say, i need to change for Allah and he will forgive me. but i dont know if i ever will and while many of you will look down upon me, this is my truth.

ive seen hadiths of people who wasted their lives being horrible and in the end they were forgiven. im not suggesting that Allah will do the same for me, but the same question is always in the back of my mind: will Allah send me to hell if i really truly had a good heart? do i have a shot at heaven?

i struggle so much understanding many rules in islam, i have so many questions i cant seem to find the answers to no matter how hard i look, but converting to a different religion is something i cant ever see myself doing. this is the one i believe is the truth. its so confusing, i want to love and understand Allah’s words and i just struggle so much, and i feel so guilty because i feel as though im angry at him.

my father is severely narcissistic and misogynistic, going to him with any questions leaves me more confused and angry than i was before.

i have nobody to ask, this is my last resort.

im sure many of you will judge me, just save your breath. i’m not someone you’ll get a reaction out of.

i just want insight from someone who knows what they’re talking about, from someone who understands imperfection.

thank you if you read this far, may Allah bless you and your loved ones.

Has anyone bought stuff from this place? Are they legit?

Salaam Ladies, I am not sure if anyone has heard of the flower of maryam - it is known to help women in labour but apparently its also to help conceive and for fertility issues.

has anyone tried the maryam flower water and has it worked?

I’m so sorry if this is too “eh” for this subreddit but I genuinely have a life changing question

All my life I’ve been experiencing discharge. I think ever since I was 13 my underwear would be soaking with discharge. Normal, non smelly, clear eggy white like discharge. And it’s almost always at a persistent time, let me explain. About 5-6 days after my period ends and after I do ghusl it starts little by little. But then 7-10th day after my period is where it starts to get heavy (very heavy as to the point I feel it dropping onto my underwear, I see it come out when I’m on the toilet), and then I am completely dry for about a week, and the day or two before my period get a very pea amount of creamy discharge (not eggy).

This has interfered with my life so much so that I don’t even wear light colors anymore bc I’m scared ab the fact that I might “leak”, or a wet drop might soak through and peak through my abaya. This is why I wear only dark colored abayas (brown, black, etc), and if I wear a light colored one I will be so conscious all day and do my hijab so that it covers my butt. Again, this is fear of not necessarily leaking but that little dot of wetness appearing through my underwear and to my abaya (very rare but can happen lol)

Discharge is completely normal I know. Every body produces a different amount. But I look at these other girls and can’t wonder do they exp the same thing?
Hell some girls don’t even wear underwear while out and about. LIKE HOW??

I would appreciate any advice. I do 90% feel this is all normal and I’m freaking out and I should just accept my body is doing what it needs to to keep healthy (especially since every single month it’s the same exact pattern based on where I am in my cycle).

Sorry for the rant. Wonder if any of my other fellow girls relate :( so sorry!!

This is a bit embarrassing to admit, but I decided to wear fake nails for a little while, mostly for the day of my cousin's wedding. It was fun while it lasted but now I'm genuinely struggling to take them off. I try following the instructions online but even after hours I was barely able to make a difference. I'm being told I might have to buy a nail drill (something I know I won't use again) but my period ended and I miss praying. If they've grown out a bit and my normal nails are exposed, can I still do wudu to pray?

I’ll be travelling to the UAE this November and would really love to visit the Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque in Abu Dhabi. I want to make sure I’m dressed appropriately and respectfully, so I’d really appreciate some advice.

For those familiar with the UAE/mosque etiquette:

1. Where in India would you recommend buying good-quality abayas? I’m particularly looking for cotton or linen, as I’m quite sensitive to most fabrics. Can I wear my kurta + palazzo with an open abaya?

2. Does the headscarf need to be a particular size?

3. Are there any Indian brands or stores that make comfortable, breathable abayas and scarves that you’d recommend?

4. Outside of the mosque, what would generally be considered appropriate/reasonable to wear in Dubai and Abu Dhabi, particularly in malls, restaurants, tourist attractions, etc.?

I’d rather be slightly overdressed than accidentally wear something inappropriate, so any advice or recommendations would be greatly appreciated. :)

i am 20 F, and my parents are threatening to cut ties with me bcuz i wear pants to work. so i recently started a new job and i have a uniform with the option to wear any pants i want, and the other day I came back home with the baggy pants i was wearing for the first time, and my mom sat me down and told me i was going to hell for the pants i wear but they’re completely fine with me wearing a tight skirt which genuinly doesn’t make any sense to me. this morning i left to work with pants on and she gave me the ultimatum to either wear a skirt or never speak to them again. i just went out with a skirt and changed once i went to work. i actually was planning on moving out with a friend and we already have the lease but im anxious on whether i should tell them directly or let them figure out themselves, bcuz im really tired of appealing to them and this image they have of me. my brothers are fine to have girlfriends and vape and be out at night but the only sin i have is wearing pants. id love any opinions on how i should go about this moving out process with them bcuz i do love my parents despite their faults but im really tired of constantly being anxious and having to tiptoe around their feelings and ending up with my feelings getting hurt when im honest.

just a silly vent post but i hate how after a proper wash day if i want to go out i feel the urge to hastily do my hair in a way that makes it look "small enough" to be presentable. like, im black, my hair doesnt want to do that!!!! 😭 (not unless it's being manipulated for hours, or if u want to be quick the style is not going to look very good) i wish we could all band together as black hijabis and agree on a tasteful amount of bigness to still be considered neat and presentable 🥹

Salamu Alaykum sisters!

Since my teenagehood I have always been insecure about my eyebrows' weird shape; they're darker than my natural hair colour, look thick but are empty in the inside, and the hair from the end edges almost reaches my upper eyelids and my hair line. Now that I am almost in my mid-tewenties, looking at the other girls clean eyebrows makes me self-conscious about mine, I also get a lot of questions of why do I not get them done.

I know that it is strictly prohibited by the prophet to pluck our eyebrows, however, I have heard multiple opinions regarding this topic and I would love to hear yours.

I am not looking to change its shape, but to only pluck the edges to make it look more clean and even.

PS: I sadly cannot ask a scholar, if you have a trusted source please share.

Please be respectful and thank you in advance.

This is just a rant but I wish I could move out. I really really do. But I can’t because my parents are disabled and have no one to take care of them. I literally do everything and manage the house when I’m also in school. I am so tired, I can’t sleep or eat or study. I hate living here and wish I could get out of here and live my life and be my own person instead of being a caregiver. I am doing it all alone, when other people are studying as I write this.

Sorry if this is not the right space I just need to vent in an Islamic space or else people will just tell me to cut them out of my life etc.

From my childhood my teachers,relatives,friends,cousins and everyone has always shared positive thoughts about me. They always tell me they would be so lucky to have me as their daughter, i hope your good habits influence our children etc. They always have praised me for being a kind and thoughtful person. Yet my parents are the only people I have never heard any praise from. I never complained about it because I never let it get to my head.

But recently after 23 years of just having patience, I think I'm starting to get tired. The more I do for them is still so less. If I reach point A they say you could have also reached point B C D, reaching point A isn't smth celebratory. Whereas everyone else will be so happy that I have achieved my milestone that they will make some good food for me or gift me something or talk about me very proudly.I feel so touched.

Everyone says to have patience with toxic parents but idk how else to hold on. I really don't like coming home anymore. I prefer working long hours and staying outside so that I don't have to come home and meet them. They make me so unhappy.

Today I asked my father to accompany me to get admitted to a place. I could have done it without him but I still wanted him to be involved here so that the admission officer doesn't scam me. He told me we will go out after 430. I called him but he said he's busy we will go out after he's done with his meeting. It's 8 now. The place is closed. He lets me down every single time I try to involve him more in my life but I never give up because I excuse his behavior but now it's getting tough for me.

My mother on the other hand, as long as I do her bidding she is nice to me. The moment I get busy with my own work like studies and work she gets annoyed. Even if I cook something everyone loves she will insult it. If sm1 praises me for my looks she says ' why won't u get praises, u look just like me, I was so much more beautiful than u at your age'. Even after all these I try being nice with her always never letting my anger out but seems like she enjoys insulting me.

Salaam everyone! Welcome to Venting Mondays!

Having trouble with your parents? Going through some personal struggles regarding wearing hijab? Just want to blow off some steam? Share your thoughts with us!

Please note, we will be redirecting venting posts to this thread. We are not doing this to silence your feelings, rather, we are aggregating the posts from the suggestion of the greater community. Insha’Allah, it will be easier for the community to come back to this thread to provide support and advice as needed.

Just a reminder that even though it's a vent thread, the rules still apply. Please don't disrespect others.

I really wish I had just fasted while pregnant because making them up now is sooo hard 😭😭
I have quite a few to make up and with being a mom it’s actually a struggle lol. For those of you who had missed fasts from pregnancy, how did you guys make them up? Did you do a few here and there or try to finish them all at once?
I need some motivation because wallahi 😭

I checked for the purity and on the first look i cannot tell if there's any yellows and it looks clean/unstaines, but upon bringing it closer to my face i see obvious light yellows. Is this my menses or not? I haven't seen clear discharge or full dryness yet but I'm not sure if the fact I didn't witness yellow immediately can count as impurity. I never have yellow discharge or tints usually when I check outside of menses so that's why I don't know, even if i check then wait a few secs it won't usually turn yellow if im defo pure when checking outside the menses so I super confused.