Hi everyone,
I’m reaching out to the community for some urgent assistance. The Department of Human Resources recently contacted me to take in my younger sister as a kinship placement so she can leave foster care.This came up on very short notice. I just recently moved into a new apartment, and unfortunately, all of my savings went directly toward my move-in costs, deposit, and initial rent. To officially bring my sister home, I need to pass an immediate home inspection to ensure the space is fully ready and safe for her.I’ve put together a privacy-protected Amazon Wish List that includes basic emergency safety and home setup items required for the inspection, essential everyday needs for her, and a few of her favorite snacks to help make this quick transition as comfortable as possible for her.
Any help—whether purchasing an item off the list or upvoting for visibility—would mean the world to us and help bring my sister home safe.

Wish List Link: https://www.amazon.com/registries/gl/guest-view/AW73W4SVI033?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_ggr-subnav-share_SCSR8NHTDC15M9NM7RWD&language=en-US
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and for supporting our family during this transition.

I (M26) have kinship custody of my half brother (M13). I have pretty much never known him because I was removed from our mother’s care by the time she had him. I didn’t even know he existed until he was maybe 5. I have no idea how he wasn’t removed from my mother’s custody until now, honestly. I was removed because she is unable/unwilling to get help for her mental illness and she has struggled with substance abuse as far back as I can remember.

So as of two weeks ago, I have a traumatized teenager in my house and no idea what to do. He is also on probation because of something that happened a few months back. I don’t really know how to talk to him about anything real. I don’t know how much I’m supposed to tell him what to do beyond keeping him safe. Any attempt I’ve made to “parent” has backfired and clearly scares him off. We basically just coexist in my house right now.

I wish I could tell him a lot of things. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for him when he was younger. I want to be there for him now. I don’t know how to do that in a way that works for both of us. I’m hoping a lot of these things will just settle with time and we’ll be able to find a rhythm that works. But right now I just feel lost and I think he does too.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for here besides a place to vent and maybe some support. Anything helpful is welcome

I am 19 and my 21 yr old boyfriends little sister has a horrible home life. Today we made the decision to call CPS and tell them about the constant verbal abuse, drug abuse, neglect, etc. that goes on in the home which has his little sister (14) and two adult females and a male and constantly has people going in and out to do drugs. We called, explained the situation, and they said “well, this isn’t something I’m gonna send someone out for. Just try to talk to her mom and ask if you guys can keep her for the weekend and on Monday they’ll screen the report and decide if they wanna send someone out.”

This is so frustrating to me. I just told them that her mom is forcing her out of the house so that they can do drugs and this male that lives with them has multiple times invaded her privacy. She shares a room and bed with her mom, was kept out of school for a month last year because her mom kept calling her out so she could stay home, and her moms bf is currently out on bond for an armed robbery (possibly party to the crime) and is in and out of the house as well and consistently threatens her. This space is not safe.

We want to shoot for kinship placement. We have the room and finances. I was in kinship placement when I was around her age and I know how it feels. I want to give her a safe space and environment to have privacy and a sense of self.

Has anyone else been told they will screen the report and then still had a positive outcome? I guess I just need to hear some positive words and possibly advice. I am sorry if this isn’t the right place to post this. I’m not sure where else to ask.

Hey, so I posted on this about a year to a year and half ago about my little brother i was 16 he was 7 now im 17 and he is 8. Things didn’t work out. I don’t know how to start this without breaking down lowkey 😭. Soon after i posted my last post on here my mom ended up giving him to another family which resulted him to going into a group home which is what we (i guess mainly i did??) wanted to prevent in the first place. I dont want my mother seen had a bad person she just has her faults but she decided she wasnt capable enough to do it after i started working. Before i started working i was the one mainly caring for him honestly even when i didn’t have work. I kinda knew this was (i just didnt know if it was my past trauma scaring me) gonna happen i even told her before he came into the home that if i needed to take him in when im old enough and take care of him in the meantime i will. My mom tries she really does, its just that her own mental gets in the way causing her to be a bit selfish. My little brother is not her kid he is my fathers kid, and she let alot her feelings with my father get in the way and the fact he wasnt her kid? I dont know how to explain it better because i am still pissed even though im trying to understand. I dont want to vent to much on here so ill get to the point. So she went to court and she told them she wasnt able to keep him. And found another family that was close with his uncle. They couldnt keep him so they sent him to a group home right after adopting him too btw. I cant even imagine how he feels, im sure he was already so heartbroken seeing his own sister give him away. This wasn’t my idea at all btw but i cant control my mom and honestly im glad she saw she wasnt stable enough to keep him before anything could happen. But idk i thought there was improvement and everything was getting better with the situation. So i have no idea where he is or how he is doing. He use to tell me everything and i cant even hear his voice. I keep thinking if hes okay and if he has anyone to talk to when hes sad. I remember one of the last days before he left he had a nightmare and slept with me the rest of the night. He even stayed in my arms while he was awake the next morning and i was still asleep. I miss him sm. Does anyone know if i would be able to reach out to him. I also still plan on when im old enough and stable (have my own place, enough money, and mentally ready) honestly ill probably end up taking him in if i can when im around 18-19 because i dont want him in a group home where anything could happen. Ive had many friends and family in and out of grouphomes and heard some not good things. I was wondering if there are any tips now to help me prepare for that? I cant talk to my mom about this because we always end up fighting. Any advice on how to cope? I always feel guilty and idk i cant stop thinking on how he feels and how i messed up. I just really need help.

I'm hoping someone here has experience with Texas kinship care or the DFPS system. I've been raising my sister's three children in Texas for a little over a year. They came to live with me after a period of housing instability, and it has become clear that their mother is not going to be able to resume caring for them in the foreseeable future. She is currently unemployed, does not have stable housing, and is supportive of the children remaining with me. I attended a kinship care orientation, but they told me they only work with children who are already in the foster care system. I also filed a CPS report to explain the situation, hoping to learn if there was a pathway to formal kinship care, but it was screened out because the children are already safe in my home.

My question is: Has anyone successfully gone from an informal relative caregiver to becoming a verified kinship foster parent in Texas?

Im lost to what to do with my niece who is almost 15, lying, sending nude photos on internet to strangers, generally not doing right things. This is my sister who passed daughter, who was 6 when she died, i took her on because she was out of control and needed support. I have twice had to take her to police to report online grooming and when she moved here the deal was total social media ban until 16, may seem harsh but she is very immature and naive and how she got groomed in the first place. For the last few years she has had very little support or guidance at her home, neglected and then given a phone, this became her entire world and an addiction, absolutely no supervision and led to many issues with grooming, friendships and everything. She had started to skip school and running off with an older boy who then abused her. I try so very hard to trust her but she just has continued to lie to me and today I found she has a secret instagram account, when I read through some of the messages I was horrified to see the same things again. Im so at a loss of what to do, I have her on a waitlist for a paediatrician, I have her lined up for counselling, as I know she is desperately needing this, but just when I think she turning a corner some drama happens. She also wants to be loved so badly that she will say and do almost anything for attention, and becomes very attached/obsessed in a relationship. What do I do? Part of me wants to let her go back to her home but I am so worried about what will happen to her then, and I'd never forgive myself. Anyway there's probably no answer, thanks for reading this far if you have. I am silently crying whilst I write this, I'm just at a loss.

https://benkincare.etsy.com

My twin sister was recently hospitalized in Ohio and is now on life support. Her doctors have begun end-of-life paperwork and do not expect her to survive much longer, possibly no more than a week.

She has two children, ages 8 and 12. One child’s father is deceased, and the other child’s father is currently incarcerated. We have no other immediate family who can care for them long term.

The children are currently staying with an elderly great-aunt in Clark County, Ohio. She has made it clear that this is temporary and that I need to take them as soon as possible. I had initially waited so the children could remain near their mother, but with school starting soon and my sister’s condition worsening, I want to bring them to live with me in San Diego, California, so I can provide stability and get them connected with mental health support. I am going out there this week for two weeks.

Before my sister became unable to communicate, we had discussed that I would care for the children if her health worsened. I have no children of my own and never planned on becoming a parent, but I know they would be safest and most stable with me, and I am prepared to do whatever is necessary to support them.

I am completely overwhelmed by the legal process and cannot seem to get clear guidance. I have contacted legal aid and tried to speak with someone while I was in Ohio earlier this month, but my calls have not been returned. Because the children are currently considered “safe with family,” no one seems to view the situation as urgent.

I am hoping someone can help me understand:

-What paperwork is needed for me to bring the children from Ohio to California?

-Can my sister sign anything while she is still alive if she is able to communicate or provide consent?

-Should I pursue temporary custody, legal guardianship, or another type of caregiver authorization?

-Would the case need to be filed in Clark County, Ohio, before the children move?

-How does the incarcerated father’s parental status affect the process?

-Is this something that requires an emergency custody filing?

-What type of attorney or agency should I contact if legal aid will not respond?

Thank you!

I’ve been trying to find a sub Reddit that fits - is this the place?? Thanks!

Back in February of 2022, our nephew (3 months old at the time) came to us for kinship placement and we had him until December of 2023. After reunification, we weren’t allowed any contact until July of 2024. Since then, we have had him every weekend and every time he gets picked up, he has a full blown meltdown and cries for up to an hour sometimes. He asks me every weekend if he can live with us ☹️

We have tried talking about his mom picking him up from when we first pick him up, we’ve tried telling him a little bit before, we’ve tried not telling him at all.. it’s the same outcome no matter what. I literally feel sick every time she’s coming to pick him up. I was hoping that over time it would get easier but it’s still absolutely heartbreaking for everyone.

Has anyone experienced this? If so, how did you navigate the situation? I’m open to any advice anyone may have to offer.

Does it drive anyone batty that you have to deal with people that you would never want to know exist because of kinship. I can deal with my sister to an extent and because, even if our relationship will never be mended , I want her to get better for her sons. But the bio dad and his parents are such trash, along with a family friend, who even via text carries such dark energy.

I thought they would be somewhat happy or at ease with my decision to allow a visit with their grandkid, my nephew’s cousin, because he had no record and he is innocent in this situation. However I’m asking for a third party friend to be there because it makes me comfortable and if I am having to jump through various hoops to prove that I’m a safe person then they can at least meet me halfway on this.

And my nephew’s dad has a super concerning criminal history but I’m the bad guy? Am I in bizzaro world? And he has yet to contact me at all about his son. Not that I’m upset about it. I just find it so weird.

Taking in family comes with a mountain of paperwork you didn't sign up for — visits, appointments, school stuff, meds, and every expense you're hoping to get reimbursed. I couldn't find a tool that wasn't locked to a specific agency, so I made my own.

It keeps everything on your phone (no account, nothing uploaded) and turns any date range into a clean PDF for a caseworker or court in one tap, plus a CSV of expenses/mileage for taxes. It also tracks meds with reminders and logs calls/texts for when you're documenting contact.

I'm the developer, and honestly I want to know if this fits kinship situations specifically or if I've built it too "foster-agency" shaped. What's the most frustrating part of the record-keeping for you?

My fiancé took kinship of his nephew at the end of last year. We were not in agreement on this - I was very hesistant as we are kid free and this is a huge change in daily routines. When he took on this responsibility he made it clear that he would do everything and I would have no responsibility. That has unfortunately not been the case - it is now summer break and right before school ended he informed me he had signed him up for activities and I would be responsible for taking him certain days of the week. I work 50+ hours a week while also trying to advance my career and am really struggling with this and as terrible as this sounds it’s not what I signed up for. I feel like I no longer have time for myself and just am becoming unhappier day by day. Of course this is not his nephews fault and I truly believe my fiancé did the right thing by taking him in. But for our relationship I have been considering stepping away because it’s unfortunately not for me. I have tried to give it a chance but it’s causing me a lot of stress and anxiety and I just don’t think it’s the right fit for me. I understand not everyone will agree with how I am feeling or acting about the situation.
Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Looking for similar experiences or opinions on what you would do.

Moved to be with aging family 7 years ago. My mom's health has not been the best in the last 2 years. May 14th I quit my job to stay at home with my mom and help her. She is refusing my help. She's upset that I even quit my job. My lack of money is important to her. At this point, I'm ready to say forget it and find another job. I'm second-guessing myself. Should I have left my job?

If the child in your care receives social security income from a deceased parent or otherwise, how do you use it? I understand the guidelines but am curious how other put that into practice & what expenses they choose to pay out of their pocket rather than use ss or what they expect the teen to work to pay for (phone/car insurance) if 16/17

Sorry, this is going to be long. As a follow up to my previous post, we passed our home inspection and my nephew is with us.
My sister is allowed to contact me to talk to him via phone call. I told her that I am keeping everything in a neutral tone. And I even showed my response to the caseworker. My sister texted me last night saying she doesn’t want my mom to see him, only my other nephew (big bro). My mom currently takes care of her older son.
I’m not sure if she can detect that or what the rules are for her. I texted the caseworker so I am waiting for her answer.
My sister blames my mom for the current situation but I don’t know all the details.
Regarding the dad, none of his side of the family would pass a back ground check. I don’t know them personally to gave an opinion their current state of sobriety or lifestyle.

My nephew was recently placed in a foster home due to an incident with my sister. We have a strained relationship due to addiction and mental health (bipolar). I have tried to help her in the past to no avail. I had to back away to protect my own health as well as be present for my son and husband. I always feel guilt that I haven’t done enough.
My husband and I agreed to be a resource for her younger son mentioned above. I have a caseworker coming next week to do a home visit and go over paperwork.
My sister was told my name by her public defender and has been calling and texting me. I am afraid to even look at the texts and or answer her calls due to jeopardizing the case with her younger son who will likely be placed in our care.
Has anyone dealt with how to handle contact with bio parents before? She can get volatile and frantic and I don’t want any of my words twisted. Which has happened in the past.