I've never liked my birthday and honestly never expected to make it this far. I turn 28 on the 7th and the depression is hitting hard this year. I'm questioning if I want to move to a new job, i have no close friends who live close by anymore. I was supposed to meet up with a friend for dinner and to catch up but he bailed an hour before. My mom's health hasn't been the best, I'm worried about her and I'm just mentally exhausted from everything that has been going on for the past month and a half. I'm grateful to have my boyfriend, he is the sweetest and tries his best every year to make things special but he sees that I always tend to struggle the week leading up to my birthday. Does this happen to anyone else?

I can’t stop thinking about this.
As an only child, how is life gonna be after my parents leave?
For now, they are everything I have. My whole world basically rotates around them. With their pros and cons, their good and bad, all my love and heart goes to them.

I mean, growing up was a lil lonely and all, but all the laughs, giggles, fights, sadness, and success, they have been part of it, and they were the only ones to be a part of it.
So how would I be without them? Will I even have a purpose to live for?

Idk if having siblings would even help with this, but at least there would be someone that reminds me of them.
I really, really wish this day never comes. I hate to feel like this would be my lowest point or something.
I wanted to express how I feel, even if it might sound a lil bit cringey. Especially since “ME” have always been the “thug it out” person, but this topic will forever make me wish I could freeze the times when I was a kid .

Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom, but I feel like I have nobody to truly vent to. I don’t even know exactly what I’m looking for, but I feel like I need someone to vent to about how I’m feeling in life and honestly the things I’m crying about would just annoy the people around me to talk about.
Was anyone else super sheltered? How do you vent without anyone? Do I just cry into the void until the sweet release of death? It’s not like I can go tell a medical professional that it feels like I was never supposed to exist.

I was talking with my therapist today and she brought up that part of me feeling the need to get approval from my parents so bad might stem from me being an only child (for reverence I’m in my 20s but still get insanely anxious anytime I have to tell them about a choice I think they won’t approve of, even though they’re usually pretty supportive and understanding). apparently there’s kind of more of a risk of not getting exposed as much to peers acting on their own without needing approval and therefore not really developing that as much yourself. sometimes it feels like if I fail (whatever that even really means in the grand scheme of things) it’s worse because my parents don’t have another kid they can hope will do better.

Basically, I wanted to see if anyone else experiences this or, if you’ve dealt with this but have gotten better with it, what advice you’d maybe give.