Please help me panic attack

[u/bbybun22]

During my really baf bender days and using large amounts of covaine almost everyday of the week all day, when its been many days I can get triggered with someone saying something that hurt me and put me in a bad negative headspace and then I would spiral into an anxiety attack or panic attack but the crazy thing is the same drug that caused it helped feel better the anxiety slows... I stop crying... and that was whatever back in my addiction days but I got out of it I only do a bender here and there now. But I am on a really bad bender and got emotional and experienced the worst panic attack from remembering the old days in addictio with my ex and being embarrassing in front of the new guy was seeing to see me like that currently and just feeling like a complete spiral of feelings and i just to some sleep meds and was ready to sleep and now i meed to do the same ovet again nd just couldn't stupid crying. He couldn't help me everything g he saif made it worse and I was embarrassed to need more because I already said that jusy an hour before when I had an anxiety attack. I havent felt anything bad using during my benders since I havent been in addiction anymore but this last panic attack is really taking me and I cant control my emotions it triggered to cry which fucking took me cause why am I crying doing this

I dont experience this alot. Im not crying anymore but definitely dont feel good heavy breathing , not myself still anxiety. What will make me feel better what will help. I dont know what to do with hi

He does t understand me and everything.g he says makes feel worse

Screaming while I do more coke cause I dont wanna be doing this and feeling like this

[u/camcam210]

5 Things you can see
4 Things you can touch
3 Things you can hear
2 Things you can smell
1 Thing you can taste

Easy grounding technique to follow, just go through the list slowly