Three years ago, I was a pretty successful entrepreneur. People were fighting to get an appointment with me so I could fix their life problems even old ladies were asking astrologers when the best day was to reach out to me.
I was a tough, capable guy, pretty damn capable.
I solved the unsolvable until I completely burned out from carrying everyone else's problems and the overwhelming weight of the responsibility they dumped on me.
The kicker is that I built all of that entirely from scratch, out of absolute zero, at a very young age. A true shadow power.
Naturally, your ego blows up. You start thinking you’re the smartest and most powerful person on earth, and then reality slaps you straight in the face.
I decided to pivot from construction to software to change entire systems. Things took off like crazy at first, people were literally throwing money at me that I didn't even want to take. I carried everything on my own back as long as I could, and when I finally ran out of gas, I accepted one relatively large investment.
I was someone people saw up among the stars. But then came certain "old players" people whose titles and names I won't even mention because I'm still afraid of them. They tried to take over my business. I refused to let them. Two weeks later, they put an end to my project and my entire career with a few orchestrated news headlines and a couple of sudden regulatory reforms in the exact sector I was planning to automate.
That was the beginning of a living hell that’s still going on. I fled my hometown which was probably one of my smarter moves, and likely the reason I’m still alive today.
Then came total isolation and a period where I practically ceased to exist. I woke up every single night dreaming about the people who ruined me, and those who betrayed me. It all boiled down to this: everyone hated me, but it worked as long as they feared me...
Since then, I’ve tried to rebuild three times, and I fell three times with no safety net. I’m an orphan with no parents or family. The few "friends" I had left after the first fall dissolved after three years of trudging through the mud. They forgot me, wrote me off... whatever. I don't even have enough of them left to count on one hand. And there isn't much left of me either, except that physically I'm still strong as a horse, even though I turned to alcohol in the meantime. Given how I live, I look surprisingly good.
The point is, lacking funds, I had to figure things out on my own. I self educated and built the complex systems I had envisioned myself. I couldn't forget it, I couldn't drop it. I honestly felt like checking into a clinic not because of the alcohol or drugs, but because of this obsession with programming that I just can't quit. A damn vision that won't leave me alone.
I finished the system not just one. I built a multi-tenant system designed to serve multiple industries/domains, not just a single one and it’s perfect, exactly how I imagined it, maybe even better.
And now I’ve hit the most painful wall: people don't understand what I've built. They resist it. It's like trying to push a cyclist into a space shuttle. Meanwhile, my nerves are thinner than tissue paper after surviving all this hell.
I’m in a state of deep shame, with no face to show up anywhere, no face to ask for funding, no time to wait for it anyway, and no energy left to explain the benefits of the systems I’ve created.
I went from a period where I had no finished system just an idea and people were throwing money at me and blindly believing every word I said, to a period three years later where I have a fully finished, flawless system that meets my highest perfectionism, but nobody takes me seriously anymore. Everything flipped upside down.
I have no money left, my reputation has been turned inside out, I have no car, no apartment as of tomorrow, I am literally on the street.
Where do I go from here? How? Should I bypass the mental hospital or check myself in? I have nowhere left to go.
Stalemate or at least that's how I see it.