r/UrinatingTree Sep 22 '24

Announcement I'm getting tired of removing box score posts all the god damn time.

64 Upvotes

So effective immediately, box score and other lazy shit threads are going to be met with an immediate 30 day ban.


r/UrinatingTree 4h ago

BREAKING NEWS HOW MUCH MORE?!

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115 Upvotes

Is 2026 the year of the Kroenke's!?


r/UrinatingTree 5h ago

USF Shitposting Contest Look Ma, I'm On The Camera!

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115 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 3h ago

USF Shitposting Contest A Tale Of Two Teams

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23 Upvotes

ANGELS FANS YOU’RE FREE!!


r/UrinatingTree 4h ago

BREAKING NEWS Angels fans REJOICE

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23 Upvotes

Stan Kroenke is the new owner of the Angels


r/UrinatingTree 2h ago

CONGLATURATION! ANAHEIM HAS BEEN SAVED!

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10 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 9h ago

USF Shitposting Contest The Mavericks haven't made it back to the playoffs ever since. I'll say this trade will haunt them for an even longer time.

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37 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 2h ago

"I wish Artie would sell the team..."

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9 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 3h ago

Discussion A Quick Timeout: National Sudoku Prevention Month.

7 Upvotes

What's going on everyone?

We spend most of the year absolutely clowning on franchises, laughing at LOLCOW owners (Angels fans, how we feeling?) watching teams pull off historic chokes, and screaming into the dark void about our sports misery. We talk shit, we meme, and we use sports as our ultimate escape from reality for a while.

But as Sudoku Prevention Month is upon us, let’s take a genuine timeout from the chaos. Sometimes things are just bigger than sports.

Behind team flairs, and anything else, real life can hit really fuckin hard. If you are struggling, fighting quiet battles, or feeling overwhelmed, please hear this: you matter a whole lot more than you think you do because your mental health matters so much.

I want to remind everyone that you are not weak for the way you feel. Experiencing pain, anxiety, or depression isn't a failure, and it doesn't make you a liability. It just means you're carrying a heavy load, and nobody is meant to carry the ball entirely alone.

It is also so easy to think you're dumb or you're stupid because of things that you went through or have been through. But I want to remind you that those things do not define you at all. Going through hell doesn't make you broken or less than; it just means you survived. Your past is not your identity.

This community, as chaotic and deeply cynical as it can be about sports, wouldn't be the same without you. Take a moment today to appreciate yourself, and check in on your fellow fans, friends, family, and loved ones. It is okay to ask for help, and it is okay to step away from the game to take care of yourself.

I want to give a huge thanks to Tree for making this community and giving us all a place to gather, laugh, and find some common ground through the absolute madness of the sports world. We really are a unique gridiron of misfits, and every single one of you belongs here.


r/UrinatingTree 3h ago

USF Shitposting Contest At Least You Have Andrew Thomas? Maybe Mauigoa will be what Evan Neal wasn't?

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5 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 10h ago

USF Shitposting Contest The Fall Of The Mavs

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13 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 9h ago

Classic Shitpost Still having more success than the other 8 QBs we've started since Beathard

11 Upvotes

The Reliaquest Bowl and Shrine Bowl gave me too many delusions.


r/UrinatingTree 2h ago

Classic Shitpost Watch the Mets STILL find a way to whiff past this

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3 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 21h ago

USF Shitposting Contest A Random Moment in the life of UrinatingTree.

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82 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 19h ago

YOU BLEW IT! ARE YOU LACKING AGONY IN YOUR LIFE? CALL THE SEATTLE MARINERS DICKPUNCHING HOTLINE TODAY!

50 Upvotes

Call 1-800-DK-Punch to recieve your very own Seattle Mariners guide to The Self Inflicted Dick Punch! For just three installments of your own sanity, our expert operators will walk you through the epitome of baseball induced testicular trauma!

Bottom of the 9th. You have the lead. You have the momentum. All you need to do is play exceptional defense to get the 2nd out and hopefully hang on to win the game. Enter J-Rod.

Step 1: Instead of an out, Julio completely whiffs on a sliding catch, eventually turning into a disastrous triple.

Step 2: Ceddane Rafaela drives Roman Anthony in to tie the game. If this doesn't numb you, I don't know what will.

Step 3: The Galaxy-Brain Milkshake. Scott Servais looks into his bullpen and decides to shake it up, by intentionally walking not just one, but two hitters. Bold strategy Cotton, let's see how it pays off. BASES. LOADED.

And right on cue, the Red Sox walk it off in the 10th, 9-8. Nothing like a beautiful shot to your nether regions.

DON'T WAIT, PUGET SOUND OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY TO PUNCH YOU DIRECTLY IN THE JEWELS!

CALL 1-800-DK-PUNCH TODAY AND GET YOUR GUIDE FOR ABSOLUTELY FREE! THAT'S 1-800-DK-PUNCH. OR GO ONLINE AT WWW.SEATTLEMARINERS.COM/DICKPUNCH!


r/UrinatingTree 23h ago

FUCKING IDIOT Congrats LSU!!! College Football has barely started and you're already a LolCow of the Year nominee!!

80 Upvotes

Your desperate hiring of Kane Kiffin has already come back to bite you in the ass as thanks to his aggressive efforts to bring NFL players into your team as well as for abstaining against voting to ban NFL players from college sports you're facing sanction and possibly expulsuon from SEC. Yikes. Imagine if Tulane and James Madison ends up joining. They'd be more worthy than you guys frankly.

This is divine karma for bringing in both Brian Kelly and Lane Kiffin. You knew the risks and now you're paying the piper.

LolCow of the Year Nomimee already. Must be a record for a college football team.


r/UrinatingTree 10h ago

USF Shitposting Contest Tree during the NFL season

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7 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 1h ago

Discussion I know Stan is a polarizing figure especially in St. Louis. But let's be real, he knows how to run franchises.

Upvotes

Look at his track record

Rams- won a super bowl

Nuggets won a Championship

Avs won a Stanley Cup and probably could've won this year if not for the Presidents curse

Both Arsenal teams won

If he can get the Angels to a playoff in a couple years then he'll be considered the master of winning in sports.


r/UrinatingTree 19h ago

CONGLATURATION! The Brewers Today

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27 Upvotes

YOU ALLOWED NINE HOMERS IN A GAME


r/UrinatingTree 19h ago

Raiders announcing Kirk Cousins as a Week 1 starter

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24 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 23h ago

BREAKING NEWS UCLA has told Martin Jarmond to fuck off!

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21 Upvotes

Too late to save the season... Maybe next year for the blue and gold faithful.


r/UrinatingTree 1d ago

BREAKING NEWS Father time has taken the G.O.A.T. of soccer, but...

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85 Upvotes

Messi will finish off his entire career in Major League Soccer, like he has been for the past 2 to 3 years to begin with


r/UrinatingTree 1d ago

USF Shitposting Contest UrinatingTree’s Daily Mindset

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35 Upvotes

Yes, his dick is stuck in a whopper.


r/UrinatingTree 19h ago

Classic Shitpost If UrinatingTree ever showed up on Sardonicast

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8 Upvotes

r/UrinatingTree 1d ago

USF Shitposting Contest WAY TO GO!!!

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59 Upvotes