please hear me out before you judge the title.

For some context, my parents divorced when my siblings and I were young, so my dad raised us with the help of my grandma. Around nine years ago, we were invited to a non-denominational Christian church, and that’s where I met him. Let’s call him Jake.

Jake and I got along really well, and as the years went by, we became good friends. I eventually started developing feelings for him, but he had a girlfriend at the time, so I never said anything or confessed how I felt.

Meanwhile, my dad eventually started going to the same church with us. That’s where he met the woman who is now my stepmom. They fell in love and eventually got married.

Here’s where it gets complicated.

The church is family-owned, and Jake is related to my stepmom’s family. I didn’t even realize there was a family connection until AFTER I had already developed a crush on him. Jake and my stepmom are considered cousins, but they aren’t blood-related. My step-grandmother’s sister is Jake’s mom, but she was adopted into the family.

So, after my dad married my stepmom, Jake technically became my second cousin through marriage. Again, there is absolutely no blood relation between Jake and me. We also knew each other and had our own relationship years before my dad and stepmom ever got together.

The thing is, I love him more than I’ve ever loved anybody else. We’ve gone through some trials and had times where things between us weren’t easy, but somehow we’ve always found our way back to each other. Over the past year especially, we’ve rebuilt our relationship and gotten really close again.

We haven’t officially put a label on anything, but we both know there are feelings there. We show each other love in different ways, mostly without anyone else knowing.

Now we’re both a little scared about what happens if we actually decide to make it official and tell everyone. I don’t know how our families would react, even though we aren’t related by blood and our connection existed before our parents’ marriage.

And then there’s the other fear: what if we finally go for it and it doesn’t work out? Would it make family gatherings awkward? Could it cause conflict in the family or even within the church?

Part of me feels like I shouldn’t let the possibility of things going wrong stop me from being with someone I genuinely love. But another part of me understands that once other people know, there’s no really going back to how things were before.

So… what would you do in my situation? Would you take the chance and tell the family, or is this something that’s better left alone?

edit: i'm 22(F) and jake is 25(M)

I (23F) just found out I’m pregnant. I don’t know what my next steps should be. I know I have to go see a doctor at some point so they’ll probably help me a bit but what do I start planning for? Is my diet really restricted? I just had alcohol 2 weeks ago. I’m also diagnosed with adhd, BPD, and anxiety. I was planning on moving out of my parents house next month but I’m not sure that’s a good idea now? Or maybe it can be so I can have my own space with my baby but then if maternity leave comes will I be able to pay the rent? The dad is in my life he’s my bf (27m) but I don’t wanna rely on him because this is my baby and I wanna make sure I can do everything for my baby myself and yes he will help but I don’t wanna be like fully reliant on him. I just don’t know anything about having a baby!! What tips or anything are there someone can give me pls. Thank you

There’s a girl who got married and moved to her husband’s family home. Everything is fine in her marriage and with her in-laws. Her husband’s family has a family business selling honey.

After she moved in, she found out that they mix sugar into the honey and sell it. Apparently, this is something many people do these days, but she just couldn’t feel okay about it.

She talked to her husband and her in-laws about it, but they told her they can’t change the way they do business because this is how they earn their livelihood. She also spoke to her own family about it, but they basically ignored the issue and told her not to worry about it.

She has tried to ignore it too, because everything else in her life is fine. But somewhere deep down, she feels guilty and uncomfortable knowing that their business involves deceiving people and selling something that isn’t genuinely pure honey. She doesn’t want to make a living by misleading or cheating others, and this thought has been bothering her a lot.

She doesn’t want to destroy her marriage or create problems for her husband’s family, but at the same time, her conscience isn’t allowing her to simply accept it.

If you were in her place, what would you do? Would you try to accept it and stay out of the business, or would you take some other approach?

I am writing this because I want to hear your opinion. I am in love with my teacher, and I know it's bad. However, I acted normal, except that I liked talking and joking with him. Nothing more. But still, he changed his behavior towards me a few months ago—before that, he was distant and we had a normal relationship.
Then he became much more relaxed, paid way too much attention to me, and allowed me to do whatever I wanted in class, unlike the others. I got an A (a 5) even though I didn't deserve it based on anything. He constantly looks at me during class for no reason, and others notice it too. He VERY often tells me that I'm pretty and things like that, defends me, and whenever someone calls him out on how he acts around me, he flies into a rage, slams his fist on the desk, and continues doing what he was doing.
He constantly keeps me back to talk longer and barely lets me leave. We rarely talk about school topics—it's always ABOUT ME, and he always asks personal questions. He is constantly in my face; I step back, and he gets even closer, which can be uncomfortable. And he is only like this with me.

so my ex has this very sentimental shirt of mine. we have been friends after the breakup but the other day had something like a fall out so i don’t want to see him. lowkey need to give him back a shirt of his as well. the main issue is that he lives about an hour and half away and i don’t have a car. unfortunately i don’t really have anyone to ask to make that drive either. (usually took the train to see him and hang out) every option to get it back sucks but:

1. uber courier. very very expensive especially one way but eliminates awkward contact
2. bite the bullet and go get it myself. way cheaper but like i said i don’t want to see him and it’s a long journey back and forth
3. ask and pay him to ship it. i’m not sure if he would be willing to and also don’t want to ask for any favors at all right now

it’s not the end of the world bc it’s just a shirt but circumstances mean alot to me and i don’t really know if i can trust him to not donate or throw it away because it’s painful for him. what should i do? other ideas?

edit: the circumstances were not that toxic lol. not blocked or anything crazy just uncomfortable. all the burning and trashing stuff is unlike us lmfaoooo if that helps

She is an online friend of mine *younger than me, she Indian in 10th grade* her half yearly was in August it's September now, she just gave 2 exams and skipped the rest, her father got a call from school asking why she isn't giving exams. She didn't gave me any reason on why she didn't give the exams and I feel is lying to me I genuinely want to help her as she is a great and humorous personality.

*PS: Don't tell me to block her, leave her on her own or anything*

Little backstory ( promise it’s important )

My boyfriend got me pregnant and we both were in a good place in life so we decided to continue. Fast forward a few months into it he stopped coming around, quit his job and left me with all the housing bills while he lived with his mom. I thought it was strange but was so scared of being alone I put up with it. He ended up getting a dui and almost missed the birth of his kid. After the baby was born he moved back in and seemed to only be me and his baby that he was concentrated on. He didn’t have a real answer on why he left so I went through his phone and found out about his horrible cocaine addiction and the cheating. I confronted him and he begged me to stay with him promising he was clean. It seemed true so I stayed. Almost a year later. Maybe two months ago he’s been trying to leave over minor arguments. With me convincing him to stay. Things have been better for a few months and we have been planning futuristic things. I just went through the phone again and found out he’s been using again. Idk what to do. I don’t want him to spiral like last time & I don’t want him to run away again because of it. I love him so much and just want to help him. Any advice helps.

Problem/Goal:

My cellphone’s motherboard got damaged, and I need money to repair it, but I don’t have enough. I’m only 16 years old, and I currently only have ₱500. 😭

I really need my phone for school, especially for researching, communicating with my classmates, and doing schoolwork. I also use it for editing and creating content.

Context:

My phone got submerged in water, and after that, it stopped working properly. I already had it checked, and they said the motherboard may be damaged. Even with a new LCD, there was still no display.

I’m worried because I don’t have enough money for the repair, and I don’t know what to do. I can’t afford to buy a new phone either.

Previous Attempts:

• Tried turning the phone on, but it wouldn’t stay on.
• Tried drying it with an electric fan.
• Had the phone cleaned.
• Tried a new LCD, but there was still no display.
• I was told that the motherboard might be damaged.

Does anyone have advice on what I should do? Is there a cheaper way to repair it or recover the files from the phone? Any advice would really help. :(

Wife is on vacation in Hawaii with her best friend for the week and I'm staying home. Other than work I have a full week to myself. I don't particularly feel like being in my house alone all week. Any tips or ideas?

My gf currently has a mucus infection. She asked me if she should eat ice cream and I said i don't see why not. She then went to Gemini and asked the same thing, it told her it can make her mucus thicker and so on.

I told her there's no problem with having ice-cream and relying on AI is not always reliable. I even showed her ChatGPT's response to further prove my point. ChatGPT said it may feel like its thicker but it doesn't produce any mucus, the sensation will go away.

I thought she was joking when saying this but she was dead serious. I'm kind of getting the ick if she relies on AI this much in making logical decisions.

Every logical thing you can think for yourself she uses AI. Another situation was a day ago. She had a blocked nose and asked AI for help on how to sleep with it. It told her to elavate her head with two pillows. The next morning she woke up with her jaw hurting. She went to the doctor and it turns out because of the way she slept, mucus went down to her ears and caused an ear infection.

I've tried my best, but it seems like there is nothing i can do. It's making me view her differently and not so 'smart'.

I'm a transgender female who was a man and now I regret cutting it and want to be a man again. I have desire for females now and wish I could get my thing back.

So what should I do?

So idk this is kinda random and i dont really think any of you will care but I need some advice and im finally turning to the internet for help. Theres this person in my friend group who most people are chill with and hes in a relationship with someone else in the group, but only me and my best friend know that this guy is a rapist. we have tried to warn the person hes dating about him but she wont listen. the only way i know about him is because i used to be in a relationship with one of his victims up until a few weeks ago and am now concerned I cant do anything about it because im not apart of the issue anymore. my best friend is panicking and we want to help but we cant a) tell everyone without exposing my ex b) confront him without it getting really hostile or c) do nothing. this is actually very serious and like important to me and quite a few people, so if anyone has any ACTUAL advice please help us out. ty!

Ik this is probably a really dumb question but, my girlfriend and I (both virgins) tried having sex twice and I wasn’t able to put my penis in. We did around 40 minutes of foreplay each time and she was very wet and said she felt ready for me. I’m certain I wasn’t “missing the hole” and my penis was just pushing up against it and not actually going in. She said she felt a bit of pressure and stretching so maybe a tiny bit of my penis went in? During foreplay, I fingered her and she said it was good and not uncomfortable at all. We added a bit of lube after trying for awhile but it made hardly any difference.

Any advice? All suggestions welcome

I went out for my friends birthday party and at one point we had to go around the table and say what we love most about her/our favorite memory with her. I said something along the lines of “you are the most thoughtful and genuine person I know” along with a very wholesome memory of us together. Afterwards, she had to go around the table and say her favorite thing/memory for us. As she was going around the table for her other friends, she said things like “you are so kind [insert sweet memory]” or “you always surprise me [insert memory on something they bonded over]”. I was really looking forward to what she would say about me seeing that we have been friends for about 4 years and have plenty of memories together. However, once she got to me, all she said was “idk you’re just a vibe” and moved on to the next person. I was increasingly hurt by this and totally caught off guard. She could have said literally anything else, but she picked the most vague word to describe me.

I am not sure if to bring this up to her without it coming across as me looking for a better compliment since that’s not what the issue is. Is it even worth bringing up?

So while I was banging the screws with the phone holder it breaked down so I want to do something with it so few of my ideas were to crave it into a small sword or put holes in it and color it but I don't have a chasel or screw driver or any other materials

I did some junk removal for an older lady who lived in a rundown home and was happy to help, took a bunch of things to the dump costing me around 120$ to dispose of for her, coolers, freezers, old electronics, after I was done she can’t pay because she doesn’t have the “money”, she is the sweetest old lady but I’m a broke college student and I don’t want to lose 120$ but don’t want to really try and get the money from her.

Okay so my (24f) little brother (22m) has a 3 year old.

Last weekend was my dad’s birthday. We all went over to my dad’s for dinner. When my little brother and his crew got there, my dad asked my niece for a hug. She was kind of stand offing like she wanted to but in a little bit or something. She’s a big hugger, but sometimes she wants to play first.

My little brother made his voice stern and basically ordered her to give my dad a hug.

He said “give grandpa a hug.” Probably 4 times in a very stern voice.

It really bothered me. I didn’t say anything but I’m debating on if I should.

I believe children have bodily autonomy, and should not be forced to do anything. Obviously I’m not talking about bathing or eating. I’m talking about interactions with others.

If I said something, I would say something along the lines of-

Hey I noticed this interaction, I know she’s not my child but I think this is wrong. Or something like that idk ..

I think the biggest reason why I have an issue with parents forcing their children to hug adults, is it teaches them to be uncomfortable for the sake of others. It teaches them, they aren’t in control of who has access to them.

My parents always said this to me when I was younger. I genuinely thought anytime someone wanted a hug I had to hug them. I hated hugging people. Then when I started being sexually assaulted I thought well if I don’t just let them I’ll get yelled at.

Should I say something? Do I just leave it alone?

Update: I brought it up with my brothers fiance.

I asked her if they were thinking about teaching my niece about safe touch. She asked what I meant.

So I told her it’s grooming and sexual assault prevention. And told her there’s a lot of good books and songs for kids to teach about safe and not safe touch. And I told her what I noticed on Sunday.

Anyway we were talking about it, and she mentioned she wants to get books when she’s a little older, and that she also didn’t like how my brother reacted. But both agreed if I brought it up with my brother he would get defensive.

He’s kind of aloof and thinks everyone’s out to get him. He also isn’t very good at taking accountability.

So I brought it up with his fiance instead. I don’t know if she’s going to talk about it with him or not. But I know I feel better knowing there is a plan to teach my niece about safe and not safe touch.

Have a work meeting for three days 6 hours away. I will be driving and using my personal vehicle to get the mileage money. Coworker just asked if I wanted to carpool to the event. As an introvert having to spend 6 hours in a car making small talk is my nightmare. Plus have IBS so just thinking about having to stop and go to the bathroom frequently is giving me anxiety.

How do I decline?

Hi. So just for context I live in work housing. So there’s just a buncha guys in this one house or were. There’s only 5 of us now. Now we are all downstairs in this place and the rooms are all in a line one by one right next to each other. Sharing walls with the next one. So this morning was the second time I’ve been woken up by one of my work colleagues having sex. Now I usually can give it grace if it’s on our day off. But this getting to a point where it’s keeping me up on work nights and waking me early on work days. I don’t really know what to do. I know something needs to change but, I don’t really know how to go about it.

this guy openly tells me that he's a failure academically, romantically, and financially, that he hates his appearance and lacks self-confidence, but from my interactions with him so far, I feel he's an exceptionally kind and naive person, and he also seems to have money so I'm not sure why he says he's failing financially. I just hear a lot of warnings about dating insecure guys but insecure guys don't usually say it so openly and casually so idk man.. help.

also important note: he's 30 and never been in a serious relationship in his life but i didn't think much of it because he comes from a muslim family and muslims usually don't do dating, but his excuse was different, he says girls are afraid of him because they assume he's toxic without giving him a chance (?)

I’ve been with this woman for multiple years and she was being forced out her place with her child from a previous relationship around the same time I was moving so I decided to get a two bedroom and move her and her child with me but ever sense we moved here all she does is complain and I tried fixing everything but nothing was enough I pay all the bills because she’s off and on with different jobs I realized that bothered her I offered to pay for her to go to school to get her a career of her choosing but after various excuses that’s never happened she has a car she bought before me she couldn’t afford it I bought the car put it in her name so she never felt like I would try to hold it over her she beef with her family I try to play peace maker problem with her child I try to solve it any type of physical labor outside of cooking or cleaning I handle all myself everything in the home including her child’s room I bought she cooks and cleans and I’m grateful for that because I go to work and I come back exhausted everyday I’m a blue collar worker so I come back tired and dirty so coming home food made house clean that’s a great feeling but as of lately I feel like she’s been taking some of it for granted so I tried to sit down and talk with her she blew up on me and stopped talking to me and said she will be out my hair soon it’s been about a month now she walks around the house doing as she pleases won’t say a word to me and is yelling at her child when ever they speak to me but she’s still spending my money she’s still living in this house still using a lot of my stuff I put her name and her child’s name on the lease because I didn’t want to cause a situation where she seems unfit or homeless and that affects the custody of her child because there were previous problems there so to avoid it I put their names down too now I feel like she’s walking around with a chip on her shoulder like I have to take care of her now as far as I see it she broke up with me but still expects me to take care of her until either the lease runs out or until she gets herself situated to go off on her own and the feeling of being used is making me uncomfortable in my own home now I feel like I backed myself into a corner trying to be a good guy and it’s eating at me what should I do

so i emailed a gym about working a front desk position. the manager got back to me and said they’d be happy to connect about it but also sent this:

“I’d also love to have you come into the studio and take a class with us sometime this week or next! Take a look at our class schedule and let me know what day/time works best for you, and we can coordinate a time to meet as well.”

They’re offering it free of charge so I can’t use that as an excuse. I have a physical disability that limits the workouts I can do…not really sure I should disclose that.

What excuse can I give to not participate?