Trans people’s right to legal gender recognition is much older than we realize—older than abortion rights, Alaska’s statehood, and the Civil Rights Act. That history just became common knowledge.

Write-up: https://www.transiticsnews.com/p/trans-peoples-identities-have-been

Full timeline: https://timeline.transiticsnews.com/

There's no magical forcefeild that a woman sign over a bathroom door creates? A man with bad intentions could walk in whenever so why are people so concerned that a cis man will say "no im a trans woman" like ok? If said person does something horrid saying they're trans doesn't obsolve them of any crimes... this discourse just really confuses me-

Update 1:

Her and I have talked about this and resolved it. The main issue here was partly that she'd misunderstood me, thinking I wanted to ignore or erase my past, that I didn't allow her to think back of me in the way she wanted to. I belive she now understands the dysphoria and discomfort the deadname causes me. Thank you all for your advice!

Update 2:

Please do not judge my mom's mental state or wellbeing based on this one post, especially when doing so based on details that really are unrelated to my concern. Please understand that we can see things differently and have different ideas and disagree about it without the other party being stupid, dumb or emotionally unstable. Remember that she's my mom, who has saved my life so many times and helped through really dark times, and I love her. To point out flaws is one thing, to verbally attack her is another. Please don't do that. Thank you.

First of all, I just need to be clear about something: I love my mom, and she's been nothing but supportive in my journey of discovery and growth since coming out as trans. It took some time, but she's adjusted well to my change of name I use and the pronouns I prefer, so the issue here isn't a lack of support or acceptance.

This whole thing started several months back when she mentioned that she wanted to get a tattoo of five hearts, one for each of her children. That'd be me and my little brother, as well as her three miscarriages. I thought it was a really nice idea and had no issues with that until she told me her idea regarding the heart symbolizing me.

Basically, she wanted to include both my deadname and my chosen name, have them intertwined somehow, the old name turning into the new one. This is where I said that I didn't really agree with that idea, simply put because I don't want to see that name being permanently tattooed onto her as it would cause discomfort for me. I initially explained that it seemed like a way to hold on to the past and that it made me feel like she wasn't fully embracing who I am today. I told her as much, saying I thought the idea was nice symbolically, but that it would have been much more affirming if she'd just wanted to use my chosen name.

Me opposing that idea made her cry. She felt as if I looked at it in the wrong way, that the change from one name to the other was meant to be a sign of acceptance, a way to honor my past and present, a way to remember my roots while also accepting the person I am today. I basically feel like I ruined the entire idea for her and she never got the tattoo. Since then we've discussed this three times without resolving anything, always walking away from the conversation feeling worse than before.

She feels as if I want to ignore the past, that I want to forget who I was and what I came from, something that I've tried to deny by explaining that I am still the same person, even after changing my name, pronouns and gender expression. I do know that I was born a boy, that I was her son, a brother to my siblings, until the day I came out and asked them to accept me as something different. I can't deny that, nor do I want to. But even when I was little, long before coming out, I was transgender. I just didn't know it, I hadn't figured it out yet. No matter what my name was or is, I am still me. Always were, always will be.

It just doesn't seem to matter how I explain this to her, it's like she cannot even try to see it from my point of view. And I get that, I realize that it's probably impossible to imagine what it's like to be transgender and deal with gender dysphoria when you aren't transgender yourself.

It's just frustrating. Even after explaining that I've never really been comfortable with my deadname, even after trying to explain the dysphoria it causes me when people use the wrong name and pronouns and how it'd feel the same if she got that tattoo, she still seems to think that I want to ignore my past and forget where I came from, which is not the case at all.

I messaged her yesterday, a text at over 1200 words just trying to explain all this, and it didn't help either of us. We can agree to disagree, and I'm not opposed to seeing this differently. I just want her to understand where I come from in all this, I want her to realize that I am not in denial of my past or that I want to forget who I was, but that this whole thing is making me feel dysphoric. I've told her so many times now that I get what she wanted to symbolize, that I get her idea and that there's nothing wrong with what she wanted to do for her tattoo, but that it makes me feel really bad when I imagine seeing that tattoo on her and being constantly reminded of my deadname and everything tied to it.

I know that many parents or close relatives can feel a loss and even mourn someone when they come out as transgender. They have to let go of the son or daughter they were to embrace the person they have matured into. I know that they picked that name for me. That I was her first child, her first son. But I was also her daughter, simultaneously, just hidden under the surface until I was ready to come out. I just don't agree that my past would be erased because my deadname isn't included in her tattoo, because I am still me. And yet, she says she doesn't feel a grief, that she isn't mourning, the issue being me for looking at it in black and white, not accepting anyone else's perspective.

I don't know, maybe I'm in the wrong? Maybe I'm overthinking this and I'm just not seeing it clearly. I don't know. But if anyone has any kind of advice, no matter which side of this mess it relates to, please just let me know. I hate to be in conflict with my mom... I just want us to move forward from this, for her to understand me and for me to understand her. I'm just not sure what to do anymore.

Hello everyone,

today I went to donate blood and I'm a bit weirded out by the policy the center has on gender markers.

I was told their official policy is to put down your gender as what you were assigned at birth. My gender was put down as female anyway because I don't pass and the receptionist assumed. I'm on T, but they insist on keeping it as female, rather than going based off my dominant hormone.

Not only does this get me misgendered, but it's also inaccurate for testing purposes. Certain levels are going to be elevated, I'd imagine for transfems on HRT it may even bar them from donating alltogether.

Has anyone experienced something like this? I'd love to know.

Sorry, my body just reminded me I'm female. Crying hysterically in the inside right now. Can you all call me something you would call a man/boy like sir or something like masculine?

Hi I’m mtf currently thinking of starting hrt at some point in the future and I’ve been seeing the pros and cons of starting it and so far I’m okay dealing with the cons as the pros are things that I really want to see on myself. However there is one thing I’ve heard that scares me and it’s that your sexual attraction can change.

I love women, i love everything about them which is partly the reason why I’m trans, I’m not dysphoric but i do have gender envy. Anyway, hearing that your orientation can change after taking hrt is something that scares me. Currently the thought of being with a man is gross to me and i don’t want to lose that strong attraction to women i have. Id like to hear some of your experiences with that if you’ve taken hrt. And if you did a complete 180 on your sexual orientation.

I started e and spiro about a week ago and I’ve been wondering how to be a girl? Like now that I’m on estrogen it’s going to be harder to keep pretending to be a guy so how do I stop being a guy and start being a girl

(Also plz don’t say “you’ve always been a girl!” It’s endearing and I appreciate it but it doesn’t help here @~@)

So, for context, I just outed myself as trans (mtf) a few days ago to my parents and sister. After questions and talking for like an hour, my mother and sis pulled out some of their old clothes and let me try them on, which made me feel very happy. They also tried their best to quickly change over to my new name.

Only a few hours after I returned home (different city) my mother texted me she erased [old name] and replaced it with [new name] and said that this had hurt and made her feel like I had died and that she had to cry.

Im paraphrasing how she continued: "i know it isn't like that, it's just that i gained something to [old name], but as a mother that loss hurts very much. I loved [old name] very much and now I'm deleting that name. I dont know if you can grasp what that means for a mother. At the same time I'm moved by how well you're doing and am already full of love for [new name]. I hope we can find a way to deal with [old name] and that you will allow me to love him [in reference to my old name] in old pictures and stories which we still want to tell years later without hurting [new name] but also without breaking with/dissociate from [old name]. At the moment that would be like loosing one of my children for me."

I can't even really describe what I'm feeling reading that. It just hurts to be told that I died when I'm alive. I can understand where she is coming from, but i also dont know why she would need to tell me that and in this kind of way too. My relationship with my mother has never been the best because of her and my own psychological issues (mainly depression for me and anxiety and depression for her) but i really improved since figuring out my identity and getting the right medication. And i was happy that my family accepts me, cause I know not everyone is that fortunate.

Yet i have no idea how to respond to this message. I've left her on read trying to think of how to tell her that I appreciate her support but how hurtful that message is and how eerie it is how her text sounds like a split personality.

Does anyone have any advice? Any similar experiences?

Hi me and my gf are both in our early 20s and have been tgt for 6 months. In the first months we were tgt, she would cry upon seeing my genitals (vagina) in the shower or in bed. I already was feeling kind of bad about this but i assumed it was just her own internalized stuff. But once after sex she described her fantasies of jerking off/having sex with someone who had a penis. This was coupled with jokes for months about how she was going to leave me for a man and cheat on me. I’m just wondering if this is just par for the course for people in relationships with trans people.

For context, i am gnc myself and a bit androgynous. I might be a transmasc or nonbinary lesbian. She said later that she thinks sex would probably feel better with someone with a penis, but it’s not a dealbreaker for her. This just makes me feel like she’s settling for me. She also doesn’t touch me during sex much, and when she does she quickly stops and says she gets bored or tired. I’ve never felt more undesirable in my life, and I’m beginning to feel like the reason why I have only ever dated 2 people at 23 years is because i’m so unattractive.

She’s also made jokes about having threesomes with people, and when I ask if she’s serious, she quickly says that she’s joking but continues making the jokes. She has fully stopped this behavior as of a month ago, but seems frustrated with me over my inability to quickly get over it. She’s joked repeatedly about cheating on me or having a threesome with a friend of hers, which I have stated that I am no longer comfortable her being friends with, and she says she will stop hanging out with her - but I feel like she will resent me for it as she doesn’t have many other friends.

I’m going back to therapy next week but despite my pleads for her to do the same, she insists it won’t help her much and that therapy isn’t necessary as her day-to-day functioning is good. I love her so much and she’s definitely a lot better than the last partner i had, but there are so many worries and fears hanging over me and I don’t know how to manage it on my own. I know I must manage it on my own because she often says that she’s at a complete loss for what to say and do anymore.

Any advice or stories are appreciated, I really want to make it work with her :( i can answer any questions too

Basically I met this girl and we went out a few times now, but after a while I'm starting to actually think more about what this is going to look like long term and I am outright lost on basically everything. This is also my first experience talking to a trans girl.

First I think it was a bit strange that I was only told this after a couple dates as we did get physical (nothing too crazy, standard club/bar happenings, both drunk, both had a good time). Despite that, my thought process was that I liked her before I knew, enough to still give it a shot.

Nothing really changed after she told me but a few pieces did kinda start falling in place, like she dodged coming over one time after an otherwise "passionate" night. I said thank you for letting me know, doesn't really change anything for me, etc. which I think was strongly driven by the fact that I literally couldn't tell (physical attraction is near the top of the food chain for me). To me, weeks later now, this is still the craziest part. Excuse my ignorance but I was simply unaware that we'd come this far in gender affirming(?) (fill in the correct term here, I'm sorry but I have no clue).

Questions:

1. Does her member still work for sexual function and if not how should it be treated (it's been over a decade since she started)

2. I've read online about dysphoria, is this something I should ask about or will it come up over time? She mentioned tucking a while ago, something I didn't know about, so kudos for yall cuz that seems incredibly uncomfortable.

3. Is it not a bit strange that the information of her being trans was kept from me despite things having gone physical? I understand people can have trauma regarding these topics and fear of people pushing them away.

4. Tips? Tricks? General advice?

So I'm a 22 M, I'm pretty sure I'm Cis? I am comfortable as a man, and enjoy being a man. But there are brief moments that appears every once in awhile where I genuinely wished I was a woman. That I feel I would be pretty happy as a woman. I'm very much masculine presenting, so I also find it hard to imagine myself as a woman. But I sometimes just think, my life would be just the same. Not sure if happier is really the best way to put it, but at the least it would be the same level of happy?

What does this mean? And is this common?

My girlfriend (mtf) has this in her bio and I can’t tell if it’s bad or not. Is this like her saying she’s a failure of a girl? Cause I think quite the opposite about her.

So my girlfriend and I are both trans women in our mid 20s currently living in the UK. I've been on DIY HRT for a few years, but she isn't currently taking anything.

I convinced her to try DIY (sublingual pills) a few years ago, but around that time she suffered a health problem that her less-than-supportive family were quick to blame on "taking random pills from the Internet".

This whole situation really scared her, and now she's set on trying to get on HRT through the NHS despite the incredibly long wait time.

She's always been quite naturally feminine (strangers have had trouble telling her AGAB in the past), but I'm worried she might lose those features as she ages into her 30s.

I'll always find her beautiful no matter what, but I'm scared of her dysphoria getting worse and her regretting putting off HRT for so long. At the same time, I don't want to pressure her into a decision she's not comfortable with.

TL;DR: Should I encourage my girlfriend to try HRT again despite a bad experience she had?

Hi! im about to finally start hormone treatment :)

im a bit lost about some of the specifics though.. im someone who falls more into the NB/androgynous side of the spectrum so I was wondering, i know i want to go on estrogen but im hoping I can maintain my *ahem* ""function"" and ""size"" down there since its the one bit im hoping wont change during my transition!

would it be normal to ask my doctor to not provide me T blockers when i start and would that help me down there?

sorry if this sounds silly as im not rly an expert on the specifics just hoping to find answers on how to maintain my size and functionality as its something I quite enjoy about my body 😭

I've made a post similar to this before, but I currently live in the US and I was thinking of "retiring" abroad, not necessarily because I want to stop working but because the cost of living in the US is way too high. As a result I've looked into expat lifestyles and was considering moving to a country like Vietnam, Thailand (although the visa situation there isn't great and cost of living is relatively higher), Albania, Georgia or somewhere in Latin America, etc.

However there is an obvious concern of transitioning or being trans depending on where you are in the world, even the US is inevitably going to be massively unsafe for trans people as the current regime continues to crack down.

I wanted to know if there's any trans people who went the "expat FIRE" route, and if so how they achieved it. Are there any known countries/regions/areas where it makes sense to be a trans expat? Or are all of these common expat destinations equally dangerous for trans people and so it doesn't matter which one is chosen? I'd appreciate any advice about this. For context I'm AMAB, started HRT almost 6 months ago and I'm not really out to anyone, completely male presenting at the moment and pretty hopeless about passing or even being able to transition successfully in general.

I've been transitioning MTF for about 4-5 years now, I've been on estrogen and spiro and for coming up on a year have been progesterone and I've gotten a lot of the symptoms I've wanted and expected, but now I feel like I've kind of frozen.

I still feel like I'm not far enough along and now I'm beginning to miss my body when I was early in my transition and everything was still new and exciting and I feel like I somehow missed out on something.

Is this a common experience? I'm thinking of changing from spiro to another blocker and also starting injections to see if that changes anything, but I'm also scared of how I'll feel if they don't do anything. Anyway, just wondering how other people felt after they had been on HRT for a second.

I'm trying to write some stories about trans characters and i really need you guys help

i was at an on campus starbucks and i overheard a barista refer to another employee as “the transgender” in a nasty tone and im trying to figure out what i can do about it to get him like reprimanded or something. Im worried that if i call the manager they won’t care :/

I came out as trans MTF a week ago and while everyone has been nice and supportive to my face, I’m feeling this skepticism from many of the people in my life that IM actually trans because they never saw it coming. My close friend even told me people are reaching out to her and asking if I’m actual trans or just going through something. I have a suspicion that a lot of trans people go through this when they first come out, because most people only THINK they understand trans people, so when someone close to them comes out, they’re unprepared and view it through a different lens. The initial reaction to my coming out has been causing me a lot of anxiety, so I’m curious if this is a known thing that other late bloomer trans people can speak on? And if so do you have any advice for how to navigate this?

I'm so curious about this procedure. Personally, I find my (transfem) eyebrows too large, and would rather consider permanent hair removal in the area, but I can't help but be drawn to people who have gone the other way.

I know one cis woman who has very fair hair who has done it, and it seems like she has some regret about it.

Have you had your eyebrows tattooed? Do you find it gender affirming? Would you recommend it to others? What do you like about it? What do you dislike about it?

Hey there everyone, I’ll be starting hormones in a few days from writing this and I found out from my doctor that I will be using Estradiol gel rather than injections or orally. According to him Injections and oral medication are not used much in Australia.

I was just wondering if there was anyone else out there who has also used gel as their main method of getting E and how that process went for them.

thank you :3

So it finally clicked that I am trans, mtf, and I am interested in hrt. If there are any diabetics in the subreddit, did hrt affect your blood sugar or insulin absorption?