r/gaysian 2h ago

Financial success didn't grant the privilege or inclusion I thought it would.

11 Upvotes

I moved to the US in my early 20s. After navigating gay life in US, I felt constantly unseen in social settings (straight or gay), I formed a core belief: if I couldn't have white (+ gay) privilege, I could bridge the gap through financial success.

After nearly two decades of pushing myself, I reached a light bulb moment. While financial stability brings genuine peace of mind, it does not level the playing field. No matter how much I’ve improved my fitness or wardrobe, I still often feel secondary, unseen, and unattractive in mainstream spaces.

I notice it in subtle ways during conversations like how eye contact naturally shifts toward white men (and women), almost as if social validation is reserved for those seen as potential sexual or romantic prospects. I wanted to just leave mid conversations sometimes.

I don't have a solution or an action plan. I just wanted to share this observation.


r/gaysian 8h ago

nyc gaysian twink rant

15 Upvotes

been feeling awful about myself lately. i thought coming to college in nyc would make me more outgoing and have more friends. im really introverted and quiet and i feel like this feeds into my negative self image issues more as an Asian twink (lol). ive been trying to involve myself more with identity based groups (gay and Asian) but i feel disconnected a lot most of the times. it feels like i hardly meet ppl who get it or click with me. sorry - rant over


r/gaysian 21h ago

Friendly meetups - Tokyo/Osaka (repost)

5 Upvotes

Hey fellas,

First time posting here but thought I may as well try. I’ll be heading to Japan in September for my birthday and for the Pokemon 30th anniversary. I love Pokemon cards and wanted to see if anyones keen for a hangout over visits to Pokemon centres, card shops, etc. with this nerdy queer. Bonus if you’re Japanese and can get me resident access to Pokemon centre lotteries for the latest set, that is if you’re generous enough ❤️

I’m a late 20s man living in Australia, but born and raised in Hong Kong so ethnically, racially Chinese 🇭🇰 I’m a fish biologist working for farm 🐟. I’ve got a really cute puppy 🐶 love nature 🌿 and an enjoyer of all music 🎧 but specifically pop, EDM, rock.

If anyone’s keen for a friendly hangout in Japan, hit me up, I like to think I’m an open book and pretty chill.

Cheers,
N

Edit: Re-posting because the last one was taken down (selfie on a non-Sunday ooops😝), just thought putting a face to a post would be more approachable than a blank one.


r/gaysian 21h ago

Looking for gay queer Taipei friends here

4 Upvotes

21M Indonesian living for few months here looking for gay queer friends in Taipei here, I already went around Ximen Red House Outdoor Bar Area and Taipei 101 but unfortunately I couldn't approach the locals nor the international people here because I went alone and struggling with Mandarin here😅, also already planning going to Hunt, Commander D, Pawnshop, or is there any cheaper recommendation? To find communities?


r/gaysian 1d ago

My gym crush gave me his number...but I don't know if he's gay

93 Upvotes

So I usually see this Asian guy at my gym (I'm Asian too) around the same time I workout. I sometimes work out with my friend and one day we decided to hop on the treadmill after our lifting session, and my friend told me to take the treadmill next to my crush. I was in between my friend and crush and I turned to my crush and complimented his physique. He said thanks and we chatted for a brief moment. Never got names or anything. I went back to talking to my friend for the rest of the workout. We left the treadmill at the same time and he said bye to me. My friend pointed out that he never put his Airpods back in his ear after talking to me.

We've seen each other at the gym here and there and I would nod and smile and he would smile back.

Then randomly I saw him outside the gym at this rave. I went up to him and asked if he was the same guy. We chatted and finally exchanged names. I went back to my friends and then we we decided to leave, they told me to go back into the crowd and find him and get his number. I did, and he gave it to me. He was with his friends too so I don't know if he was embarrassed giving a number to another guy or not as they were all looking back and watching. But he did say "see you around the gym."

That's it and I only texted him this morning. No response yet. But I don't know if this guy is even into guys.

  • Never seen him on the apps
  • Kinda walks a little...on the treadmill
  • Kinda sounds a little but not really....
  • Kinda has stereotypical hand gestures
  • Don't even know if he's single...in his group of friends I saw him with, he wasn't really acting romantic with any of the girls or guys he was with

I mean there has to be some level of interest if he gave me his number, but maybe it's just a friendly thing.

If or when he texts back, where do I go from there to feel this out? I mean if I get a new friend out of it, that's fine too. But it's kind of hard to tell right now.


r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Call me Daddy

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211 Upvotes

r/gaysian 1d ago

Please help me to get over it, genuinely need your advice friends

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10 Upvotes

I was in a long-distance relationship with my ex for about two years. He cheated on me and ended things, but even after that he kept coming back with messages even though I clearly asked him to leave me alone. I finally blocked him on every platform.

Recently I noticed he unblocked me from my another id. At the same time I saw that he and one of my close friends (who is also gay) have started following each other on Instagram. My ex only knew about this friend through me, so it feels strange. He never talked to him, just knew that he's a very good friend of mine.

I am not sure whether I should tell my friend about this. If I explain everything, I will have to share more personal details about my relationship and my sexuality with him. Also, my friend can be a bit flirty sometimes, so I am not fully confident about how he will react or whether he will keep things private. This whole thing is making me feel uneasy and I don’t know what my ex is trying to do. this is just messing up in my head


r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Falling in love with San Francisco

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249 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY May i rest on your shoulders instead?

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66 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Car selfie.

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110 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY 23m korean, really wanting a bf lately :(

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139 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY That time I confused everyone being a blonde Gaysian at the Opry with a cut off button up

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39 Upvotes

The other people in the tour group seemed surprised to see a SoCal blonde Asian enjoying and knowing country music! 🤪


r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Bombastic Side Eyes 👀

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35 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Visiting DC

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78 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Hope everyone’s having a good weekend

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64 Upvotes

r/gaysian 1d ago

Curious if there are any gaysians who don’t hook up?

1 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Happy Sunday!

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163 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Hi from sunny Kyrgyzstan 🖐️ (m4m)

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28 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Happy Sunday y'all

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12 Upvotes

r/gaysian 2d ago

Selfie SUNDAYS ONLY Glasses or no glasses?

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20 Upvotes