r/interestingasfuck 7h ago

Goat Trying To Become Meat

3.4k Upvotes

713 comments sorted by

u/Skoldeen 6h ago

“I saved your life!”
🐐”You ruined my death!”

u/thewildbeej 5h ago

Did you hear what I said? You cheated me. I had a destiny. I was supposed to die in the field! With honor! That was my destiny! And you cheated me out of it! You understand what I'm saying,

https://giphy.com/gifs/RkzM5EYMJGP2U

u/CFCentral 4h ago

u/Darkknight8719 4h ago

u/PandemicPiglet 2h ago

What’s this from?

u/HoneyProud6565 2h ago

Forrest Gump. Go watch it 👍

u/thewildbeej 1h ago

Forest Gump has been part of my life for so long I can't imagine not knowing this. I mean I think I told my first grade teacher Forest Gump was my favorite movie.

u/StarPhished 39m ago

It's easily one of the movies I've seen the most in my life. Up there with back to the future.

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u/Kundrew1 46m ago

I have to say that scene really scared the shit out of me as a kid.

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u/CharityAggravating69 2h ago

Only if I can assist OP on the title.... The goat was just trying to show who the real GOAT is

The Goat

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u/SnooPears2373 6h ago

Even the goat is sick of this shit.

u/Lucius-Halthier 2h ago

The goat really be like:

u/PointsOfXP 37m ago

Classic

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u/Actual-Package-3164 3h ago

Forky trying to throw himself in the trash

u/sachin_root 3h ago

world is coocked that animals are sensitive to it

u/dodgyrogy 3h ago

Bwahaha.

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u/Different_Eye_6790 6h ago

"I CRAVE THE FLAMES OF PARADISE!!! UNHAND ME MORTAL!!" - the goat

u/EatenPotatoisok 5h ago

The GOAT

u/hospitalizedGanny 1h ago

I'LL TAKE MY FINAL FORM

MORTALS WILL BE AFFRAID!

u/Liqour_Mortis 6h ago

Damn. I didn’t know Goats were heavy metal like that. 🤘🏻

u/GM_Nate 6h ago

he is trying to return to hell, from whence he came

u/akwatica 6h ago

this goat behavior is why ancient times thought to associate them with devils

u/GM_Nate 6h ago

that, and they're assholes

u/DinosaurusWhen 2h ago

Don't forget their dead fucking eyes 

u/ApathysLastKiss_ 1h ago edited 37m ago

Lol no. Goats and cows represented gods in most ancient cultures. Christianity flipped them into demons to change the public image of those pagan religions to evil.

edit: for instance, Baphomet was a bastardization of Mohomet, Beelzebub a derivative of Baal, a cow god

And it makes sense. Old cultures worshipped the things that brought life: the sun, livestock and agriculture, rain, fertility etc

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u/DoomUntoOtherz42 4h ago

Until he is complete a-gain! 🤘

u/RosieFudge 2h ago

Wouldst thou like to live deliciously?

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u/jme2712 2h ago

Someone beat quake bitd

u/Other-Tangerine-3435 6h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/qhgJg2kHSUDO8

Ofc goats are metal and satanic

u/Liqour_Mortis 6h ago

Yeah in man made photos maybe. This one is the real deal.

u/swaded805 6h ago

Go a little deeper…

Why do you think man has portrayed them as devils?

u/Liqour_Mortis 5h ago

I’m here for the jokes. Not to dive into mythical creatures and beings.

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u/d_ac 6h ago

Eyes wide shut sountrack intensifies

u/resident_queerdo 6h ago

Nice to see I wasn't the only one who thought Goat Fire Bath was the perfect band name.

u/Foloreille 45m ago

I mean what is the first animal when thinking heavy metal

https://giphy.com/gifs/qhgJg2kHSUDO8

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u/deckeda 3h ago

First animal I’ve ever seen that actively and repeatedly ran into fire.

I reject the “wanting to escape into a cave” suggestion because I’m kinda thinking large flames would be a deal breaker.

u/qwibbian 1h ago

There's too much crap here for me to wade through the comments, but I suspect the goat has parasites and is trying to smoke/ burn them off.

u/Upstairs_Mycologist7 7m ago

This is the right answer.

u/iIllIiIiIIillIIl 1h ago

I don't know why it's doing this, but the boy ain't right.

u/red_ice994 1h ago

They do this to get rid of parasite in thier fur. They inhale it too and smoke the fumes to get rid of nasal parasite.

u/Ramtakwitha2 1h ago

This.

Large goat can withstand the heat better than teeny fleas and ticks. Though I always wonder how they got that learned behavior in the first place.

I understand fires exist in the wild but I wouldn't expect them to be commonplace enough for them to learn that it works without baking themselves too long, and darwining themselves.

u/PsychologicalPanic8 52m ago

this parasite thing is an internet myth.

u/F1T_13 19m ago

It's not a myth, it's a theory. It's plausible but not proven beyond doubt for goats specifically. It's a behaviour observed in other animals which is why the consensus falls on a similar conclusion.

u/Ramtakwitha2 26m ago

Cool, than what is the reason goats do this then?

I'm more prone to believe something that has a logical reason even unverified over 'they just do that'.

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u/sisam8x 6h ago

u/Dragons0ulight 5h ago

u/DinosaurusWhen 2h ago

You can get flaming elmo through the gif keyboard. The real rare find is the one where he's wearing a pope hat (someone please send it to me. I lost mine)

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u/[deleted] 6h ago edited 6h ago

[deleted]

u/MRintheKEYS 6h ago

::5 minutes later::

“Still not satisfied….. also braise me with butter again.”

u/No_Lavishness_9381 6h ago

The kebab is not cook well

u/Khelthuzaad 6h ago

They get out when they’re satisfied.

No,they get out when they wish to live deliciously

u/No-White-Drugs 6h ago

Wouldst thou also like to live deliciously? Hop in!

u/Bah_weep_grana 5h ago

I do love the taste of…………..butter

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u/Joppewiik 6h ago

Are there usually fires around areas where goats live?

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u/AngelofVerdun 6h ago

What's the actual source for this claim?

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u/WatermelonWithAFlute 6h ago

Does this not…burn them?

u/Lipefe2018 5h ago

That's fake news btw, goats do not jump into fires, they are not immune to it either, they will get hurt immediately. lol

u/piewca_apokalipsy 6h ago

As far as i'm aware that just a myth without any evidence.

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u/SweatyTax4669 5h ago edited 4h ago

after his mother died, Prepotente was never quite the same.

Butcher's Masquerade, Dungeon Crawler Carl Book 5 spoiler. If you haven't read it, then don't click. If you have read it, click away. If you haven't read it, but you click anyway, well, that's on you.

u/Candle1ight 5h ago

BAAHHHHHH

u/WoodpeckerFancy 4h ago

Right in my god dammed ear

u/tomorrow22sun 4h ago

🤣🤣🤣

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u/SteeleurHeart0507 4h ago

Holy fucking shit this better not be a spoiler

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

"Whoops"

u/SteeleurHeart0507 4h ago

God dammit donut. I’m on book 5 😭

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

Butcher's Masquerade? I'm listening to that audiobook now, it's so good. I read the books a little while ago and now I'm going through the audiobooks.

u/SteeleurHeart0507 4h ago

Yea, Butcher’s Masquerade. I’m listening to all the audio books. Im BURNING through them. Me and my fiancé are doing it together.

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

Every time my wife hears a bit of it, it's inevitably a part that makes her look at me and ask "what the actual fuck are you listening to?" and I just laugh. I think the last time was in the description of bugbears being rumored to have sexual relations with toads.

u/SteeleurHeart0507 4h ago

They’re so good! But for sure I have “what the hell did he just say?” Moments. I’m glad the fiancé and I are doing this together or he’d think I’ve gone off the deep end lol. Usually I’m the one with unhinged audio books 😂

ETA at least this was a spoiler for the book I’m currently on! I’d have been miserable knowing it was like….book 7

u/GanondalfTheWhite 4h ago

Maybe delete the original comment? or spoiler tag it for DCC fans

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

You can't unlick a butthole that's already been licked

ETA: I mean, the book is four and a half years old, but I went ahead and partially spoiler tagged it for people just discovering it.

u/viotix90 2h ago

They've got to be quick about it.

They're balls deep in the wrong hole and Mom's pulling up the driveway.

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u/McBonderson 4h ago

awww, is that we are doing now? we are making me sad?

u/viotix90 2h ago

That goat to the guy pulling it out of the flames: "YOU RUINER! YOU ALWAYS RUIN MY PLANS! I SWEAR THERE SHALL BE NO MORE WARM HUGS! YOU ARE BANNED! I SPIT! I SPIT IN YOUR EYE!"

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u/eobardtame 5h ago

Too soon bro, I still cry over Miriam

u/mista_tom 5h ago

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

u/eobardtame 5h ago

Right in my goddamn ear

u/mrfattbill 4h ago

Absolutely my first thought....that is some Prepotente shit right there.

u/dre9889 3h ago

Did not expect to find a Dungeon Crawler reference in the wild! Thank you!

u/kungfugrip-81 5h ago edited 1h ago

They didn’t use his special name.

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

only Mother is allowed to call him that

u/Otto_Scratchansniff 4h ago

Carl, you can call me by my special name.

u/CGacidic 4h ago

This shit just made my morning.

u/Scampzilla 4h ago

Neeeeeeeeew Achievement!

u/Neither-Possible-429 4h ago

But next time pull him out of the fireplace with your feet.

u/SweatyTax4669 4h ago

Better yet, push him in with your supple, shapely feet. Yeaaaaahhhhhh

u/Justhe3guy 3h ago

“Flaming hot Goatse”

The AI would literally name it that I’m 100% sure

u/akornblatt 4h ago

Someone get him a Big Red

u/Pataracksbeard 4h ago

Spoiler tags without telling people what you are spoiling are useless. This is a spoiler for Dungeon Crawler Carl book 5.

u/sth128 3h ago

Nah this is more Bianca I think.

u/PaleExtreme7399 3h ago

Greetings, Crawler!

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u/TerraByteTerror 6h ago

u/mookanana 6h ago

best use of this phrase ever. most fitting reaction for this post

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u/batman_milk 6h ago

That’s a satan trying to go home

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u/YamLow8097 4h ago

Genuinely, does anyone know why it’s actually doing this?

u/Elegant-Magician7322 27m ago

Internet says goat had parasites, which biologists debunked. But that explanation has spread like wildfire.

The goat is panicked and disoriented by something, possibly smoke, and think it’s running into a dimly lit cave to hide. It’s not feeling the heat right away, like humans would, because of their thick fur.

Goats do a lot of things which seem weird to us. Everything from head butting trees and fences, “fainting” when startled, and standing on top of cows.

u/Tealightzone 2h ago

I read in a different thread that it may have parasites in its wool, and is attempting extermite them/ease the discomfort

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u/Ticking-over 6h ago

So goats are pretty smart, but they also have a lethal combination of fearlessness and curiosity.

This means that, despite having to acknowledge their intelligence, you also have to run around preventing them from killing themselves in progressively extreme ways.

u/umassmza 6h ago

So like toddlers

u/Romeo9594 5h ago

Part of my chores as a kid/teen was going around the fence line every morning on a decent sized farm to figure out where the ram got tangled again trying to eat grass on the other side of the fence

Almost every day with that fucking idiot. Over 100ac of farm and only the grass 6" on the other side of the barbed wire was good enough. Also no matter how many times you free them, they never understand that you're trying to help

Also the ones that get their hooves stuck in the fork of a tree like. One never learned either and sadly coyotes got to her one night while she was stuck because a neighbor was watching things for a couple nights and didn't know to look for her dumbass

u/joninfiretail 5h ago

I've always said goats are clever enough to get into trouble but not smart enough to get themselves out of that trouble

u/GenosseAbfuck 3h ago

Never thought I'd relate to goats so much. Between that and eating random garbage anyways.

u/AaronDrunkGames 5h ago

Dont they do this to get rid of parasites or ticks or something that have latched onto their skin. I dont think its because of the intelligence it clearly lacks.

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u/VivaNOLA 6h ago

See vegetarians! They’re totally into it.

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u/morningnewsguy 1h ago

Is something wrong with the goat ? I thought it was an evolutionary trait to avoid fire

u/PodricksMagicStick 48m ago

Vet here: that boy ain't right in the head.

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u/IdealStatus7549 6h ago

I know what you guys are planning… let me make it easier.

u/emperor_dinglenads 6h ago

I am the KE-BOB!

u/VP-Kowalski 3h ago

What has that guy been doing to that goat...

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u/Capt4inSus 51m ago

At first I thought it was just curious, but when it went again I knew it was like me... empty on the inside

u/Beefy-Cattle4290 4h ago

can we force feed our politicians whatever this goat is eating?

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u/95_lb_mole 2h ago

Checkmate vegans

u/Amazing_Station_7943 1h ago

But really, why? No jokes please. Is there an explanation?

u/Mindless-Platypus-75 56m ago

From a few comments down-

“Goats will purposely bathe themselves in smoke or small fires to kill off bugs like ticks and such.”

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u/Lipefe2018 5h ago

The reason for this happening is actually simpler than people would imagine.

No, the goat is not suicidial, it was not trying to offer themselves to their evil lord, and was certainly not trying to get rid of ticks and parasites.

This is a goat in a environment it was not supposed to be, goats are notorious to make bad decisions when they are spooked or confused, their brain short circuit with the sudden appearence of fire and the "cave" to hide when the owner pulled the fireplace lid, so they went in, the owner pulled it back and it panicked and tried to hide in the new cave again.

u/primefart 5h ago

And what would happen if he didn't pull the goat out? Would it have preferred to cook in the fire than to exit?

u/GeneralHenry 5h ago

It will likely stay in until it's heavily burned, cant-stand-the-pain-anymore, get out, and die of infection afterwards.

u/jppianoguy 4h ago

It might pass out and suffocate from burning its lungs so quickly

u/brightblueson 2h ago

Evolution for the win.

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u/daelikon 5h ago

wow, I thought it was just trying to clean up parasites. I remember a video from years ago, where a male sheep would approach the face and the neck to a flame.

Didn't know about their brains acting like that.

u/AlooDaGreat 4h ago

you are right lol someone below pointed out it's ai slop (the comment)

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u/vivaaprimavera 4h ago

Nah... it's just centuries of being raised for food. They ended up wanting to cook themselves /s

sudden appearence of fire and the "cave" to hide when the owner pulled the fireplace lid,

cave I could understand, but ignoring the fire is "strange"

u/Glass-Performer8389 4h ago

Are goats perhaps stupid?

u/NoAbbreviations1492 4h ago

Why are you making things up about things you have absolutely no idea about? It’s to do with fleas and parasites as other commenters have said. This is embarrassing for you honestly

u/AuthorForNoOne 4h ago

this is made up, or AI. The answer is fleas, it's a response to killing ticks/fleas.

"Parasite Relief: Observers note that goats sometimes move close to flames or smoke to dislodge or kill blood-sucking ticks, mites, and fleas hidden in their fur or beards."

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u/Fast_Cockroach_3095 1h ago

They do this because of ticks, fleas or parasites on their skin which cause them immense pain and itching, jumping onto the fire and the heat kills those ticks, that’s why they do this. 

u/Rockobrocko42 6h ago

We have goats they are always weird with fire and ashes. Had one lay down in a ash pile after burning some thorn and it burned off most of its hair and got blisters on its skin. Now we make sure they are nowhere near where we are burning anything.

u/batkave 58m ago

It's a goat, it's just going back to hell where it's from

u/KanisMajorisAlpha 1h ago

The goat was either bothered by bugs living in its fur or was just generally done being his romantic partner

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u/Super_Siege_Mode 3h ago

The goat is trying to get rid of skin parasites.

This is a well documented behavior among goats, and if you ask my two cents, probably why Judaism and Christianity have associate them with demons for a millennia.

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u/Praetorian_1975 2h ago

Satan trying to go home 🤷🏻‍♂️🤣

u/Aware58 2h ago

Is he OK? Looks like that the goat needs therapy.

u/The_Goth_King 1h ago

He thought it was the gates of Hell. He was only trying to get back home.

u/DeltaBravo831 16m ago

The goat yearns for the doner pole

u/Arctic_Harmacist 9m ago

I never thought that "I'm working to keep my kid off the pole" would have two meanings, but here we are.

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u/McSquiggles887 6h ago

“I know I will taste delicious!”

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u/Aware_Cheesecake_519 6h ago

That's dangerous, goat.

u/iamthealpha384 6h ago

It’s just trying to get back to where it was made… Hell.

u/LuvanAelirion 6h ago

Goats are weird

u/TheCockKnight 6h ago

I YEARN FOR THE FLAMES

u/Dull_Perspective_536 6h ago

The fact that the goat resisted being pulled out and then immediately ran back in, makes me think this is a suicidal goat.

u/colin_dev 5h ago

He yearns to be Kebab

u/werther595 5h ago

Baphomet heading home

u/broipy2 5h ago

Wouldn't the goat just run in long enough to get singed and then run out before cooking

u/ferriematthew 4h ago

Is it trying to burn off parasites?

u/Over-Experience-4187 3h ago

His instinct is telling him to run past the fire to where it's already been burned

But surely even he can see it leads to a enclosed space. So yeah, dumb goat.

u/StatusAccomplished45 2h ago

It is probably tired if being treated as a substitute wife.

u/TheOx111 1h ago

Goats will purposely bathe themselves in smoke or small fires to kill off bugs like ticks and such.

u/StepstoPeace 55m ago

What they been doing to that goat for it to think burning to death is a good idea

u/HomerStillSippen 43m ago

Given the timeline we’re in, I resonate with this goat.

u/GOLDTOOTHTATTOO 38m ago

Now that’s Halal

u/art2849 18m ago

Trying to save him from his destiny is just wrong!

u/whomesteve 3h ago

If your goat loves fire it means they have parasites and the heat of fire killing the parasites relives the itching that comes with having parasites.

u/ronman32bit 6h ago

Self sacrifice for the lord, lol

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u/Rafael3110 6h ago

the goat try to kill tics and other pests with the fire.

or stuff that get me banned :D

u/TechnoIvan 5h ago

Let him cook (himself)

u/AuthorForNoOne 4h ago

The true answer is the goat is doing it for relief, it's a response to killing ticks/fleas.

"Parasite Relief: Observers note that goats sometimes move close to flames or smoke to dislodge or kill blood-sucking ticks, mites, and fleas hidden in their fur or beards."

u/Winrevair 4h ago

Let him cook 😙

u/AnyKangaroo8851 6h ago

Pyro goat

u/Killercode9699 5h ago

Goat knows it’s destiny

u/acromantulus 5h ago

At least let us prepare you first

u/Kind_Relative812 4h ago

Its home life must be really bad.

u/SofondaDickus 4h ago

I relate

u/zoltan_g 4h ago

He's had enough clearly.

u/Turbografx-17 3h ago

Wouldst thou like the taste of... me?

u/Wild_Firefighter1763 2h ago

In this economy, I don't blame him. 😥

u/crusher23b 2h ago

I can relate.

u/Star3in2my3y3s 2h ago

Is she an abused animal or something with a death wish? Wow.