r/polyamory • u/kdb202020 • 1d ago
Shell shocked 😢
My husband told me last night that he wants a divorce. We have been together 21 years, married 12, non-monogamous / poly for the last 6.
He feels that he has told me over the years that he feels like we’ve become disconnected sexually, emotionally, career-wise. The only thing he thinks we’re nailing is parenting.
I didn’t realise it was that bad to him. I thought we were just having a bit of a rough patch but that there was enough love here to get through it. He feels like he’s expressed it to me clearly, and I obviously haven’t heard him.
He’s been dating another woman for 17 months and he is planning on continuing a relationship with her.
I feel so blindsided, shocked, sad, heartbroken. I thought being poly would protect us from this - like we can have these great external connections as well as ours?! Perfect!
Anyway. I don’t really know what I’m looking for from this post. I don’t know how to navigate this. My whole life has just blown up in 24 hours.