r/queer • u/ProfessionalField508 • 13h ago
Bullies in Queer Spaces
I am navigating an issue where a friend turned into a bully. That friend is telling other friends a sob story which paints them as the victim. It feels like they are trying to push me out of the queer spaces we both frequent. Some of them have rules, and I have screenshots proving they said really horrible things to me. I let my therapist read their messages, and she said this person sounded really unstable and unsafe.
The start of this whole thing was them finding out I had feelings for them. I told them nothing had to change. They could just say no, and we could continue being friends. The mean comments started in the first conversation about that and got worse over the period of weeks. I asked them to stop several times. I asked them to sit down and talk to me about it. When they started saying things in front of others, I got upset with them about it, and then they sent me a message that they needed space. Now people are coming up to me telling a whole different story, basically that I'm mean for not respecting their sexuality (we're the same sexuality, but they talk about it a lot more than I do).
I've continue to try and be reasonable, but I'm tired of this. I'm worried they are going to do this to someone else. A lot of the people in our spaces are fragile, and many are pretty young. How would you all handle a situation like this?
