r/survivinginfidelity • u/RiskyControl • 1d ago
Progress Looking to the future
Read my post history if you want the full story. It’s been a pretty rough couple of months.
I’ve been no contact for two weeks now. She finally deleted her reddit profile with the picture of us together as her banner, where she would solicit for encounters.
I also finally got rid of every one of her belongings and pretty much anything in the house that reminded me of her. All the pictures, little things, memories. It was hard, but I knew I needed to do it.
Saturday I actually went out with a friend to watch football. It felt good to get out of the house, and just have a normal night for once.
Yesterday I started really downsizing. I’m donating stuff and listing things for sale that I haven’t touched in years. It feels pretty good getting rid of all the crap I’ve been holding onto. The work required feels overwhelming but if I do a little bit everyday I think I can be ready in a couple months.
And now I have a plan. I’m starting to look at apartments and townhouses, and I’m going to move across town, closer to work. A fresh place, close to lots of entertainment, away from the quiet suburbs and a lot fewer reminders of the past.
I woke up this morning feeling a lot better. The anxiety is mostly gone. I feel like I can focus. I think having something to work toward makes a huge difference.
I know there will still be bad days. I’m sure my brain will try to drag me back into the memories and the what-ifs. But I’m trying to stay focused on what’s ahead instead of what’s behind me.
Keep moving forward. Don’t look back.
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u/Rare-Bird-4353 5 1d ago
It’s amazing how fast things start to turn around once you are away from the emotional hurricane that is a cheater. Keep moving down this path and things will start to heal. You are a survivor, be proud of that.
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u/TaiwanBandit 4 1d ago
Keep moving forward. Don’t look back
Best advice right here OP.
You are a survivor. Better days ahead.
Thanks for the update.
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u/OpeningBandicoot7418 1d ago
I’m really happy for you! After reading your story and the comments, I realized that the issue with your wife isn’t just about the latest incident? How long did it last? I’m 54. I’m going through a very similar trauma right now and I’m trying to figure out how many years of marriage I need to cross off my list.
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u/RiskyControl 1d ago
It was over the course of the last 10 months. Over that time we went on a cruise together, a trip for her birthday, our anniversary trip...and I had no clue until July 10th. She was cheating with multiple people both men and women.
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u/OpeningBandicoot7418 1d ago
Madness! What’s going on with them? A wonderful marriage. The kids left home, and she just went crazy. I traced this path of infidelity and selfishness over the course of two years. Nothing foreshadowed it, no signs. I’m following your path. I want to burn everything down. Yes, there were also several men.
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