Bad friends

[u/PTSDUltimateWarrior]

This is from a long time ago, but I do have to get it out somewhere I guess. I am a 38m. One Friday night when I was 18 I called up my long time friend, we will call Sam, to see what he and everyone was up to. Only Sam did not answer the phone. Instead his friend Craig answered the phone. Craig proceeded to tell me that they all hated me and did not want to be my friends. I in turn some how ended up at a random persons apartment and got blacked out drunk. Stupidly I continued to hang out with this group of guys. We never talked about the events of the night in question, but I couldn't help but feel like they did not want me around. It was not until I returned home from a trip I took to Europe in 2012 that I finally said enough is enough. I ceased all contact with the toxicity of my so called friends and ended up moving cross country years later.

Fast forward to the now! People are jerks man. I have tried for years to make new friends, but no one gives a shit about you! I have spent the last 14 years attempting to make new friends. It is always the same. I reach out to them. I ask how they are and they respond to it. Yet it is never returned. I know they reach out to people because they are always hanging out with others. I have done the inviting myself to things in the past, but let us all be honest with each other if you did not invite someone you never wanted them there. Group chats that you have to hear about, but never apart of because you aren't that important. Camping or hunting trips that you see pictures of, but are never invited to attend. I know I am rambling, but I have been dealing with this for 20 years. I just want a friend to hang out with. I am not here for advice on how to fix this stupid shit. I just want to vent it out loud anonymously because I know it would do no good to tell the offenders.

So here is to the assholes that treat people like this, you are the scum of the earth!