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Today I was sitting at a salon and this old uncle was sitting next to me. He asked me if I knew how to use a phone because he wanted me to download a picture from Facebook and send it on WhatsApp.

I helped him and then somehow we started talking about some guy. Uncle was like bro this guy is a really good person and basically like my own brother and all that.

Then he casually tells me this guy has done around 50 qatal and has escaped phansi like 5 or 6 times.

I was just sitting there like bro what the fuck

And then uncle goes something like Allah has shown him so much mercy that he keeps surviving.

BRO 😭

You just told me this man has allegedly killed around 50 people and escaped the death penalty multiple times and your conclusion is that Allah has shown him mercy?

The way he was saying all this was also so casual. Like he was telling me about some normal respectable guy from the area.

I genuinely didn't even know what to say.

Sometimes you hear these conversations and just sit there thinking what the actual fuck is going on in this country.

If a person can allegedly have 50 murders attached to his name and people around him still call him a really good person then honestly what are we even doing.

Pakistan ka kya hoga yaar.

I’m a Male 23 only son no siblings, my parents got a bad divorce 2 years ago which left me with no one interested in marrying me. I am fairly handsome (used to get attention in the gym and college), have a gym bod, (been training for 4 years) good height and earn well too. Even after all of this, issue is k people think larka apne baap jesa hai, and honestly, everyone in my family has always said I am very different from him in most of the aspects.

Issue is I don’t want to marry any of my cousins (they are good potentials) just because no one else will accept my proposal due to my (parents divorce)

I have always craved for a lovey dovey relationship with my spouse but after this incident I don’t know how to navigate this situation. And I don’t think I’ll have that kinda relationship if I marry one of my cousins. I saved myself from every type of haram relationship or interactions too. I find a girl attractive but she’s 2 years elder than me. People in my circle say k girl should be 4-6 years younger because girls mature early and she’ll be more mature than you are.

Married people, help me navigate this please and please clear my misconceptions

Jazakallahukhairan🙏🙏

I feel like this as a woman with a darker tan complexion, I always get seen as I'm not pakistani or people will assume I am Indian or bengali. I dont mind people thinking I'm from somewhere else at first but I would like to think people would not be shocked as well when I tell them. Also I think that the guys are seen normally regardless. I think it affects women more, as if they are not accepted overall.

There are some certain emotions/terms like obsession, yearning, longing, temptation and infatuation.

They make me very curious, I read about them and I try to feel them and try to look them in people.

I try to pretend to feel how I can be obsessed with a person, I tried it once just to feel it. My kind of obsession is to stick to one person solely. And just look at each move from the way they talk to the way they smile, the way there eyes blinks or shines when they say something they're excited about. I pinned on that person for few days (That person doesn't even know me). It was fun indeed because I think our eyes matched and It left him wondering why I was look at him. That is the day when I stopped.

I read and watched some stuff about yearning. I wanted to feel that too and I tried something for that too. You know like doing little acts to show care, and it involved pinning on one person too. I pretended to think that he's my person who I want but cant have. I tried getting into that zone they call yearning. I loved this emotion. I mean trying to be with a person you cant have or be with but you know you want him. Its fascinating. I read few books about it and I think Im crazy about it.

Longing feels similar, but quieter. I read about it too and watched some stuff around it. It’s less “I want him” and more “I wish he were here.” I like the emptiness of it, strangely enough. The distance gives my imagination room to create everything reality hasn’t given me. and It was strangley crazy good. It excited me because I never felt something like this before.

Temptation fascinates me because of the conflict. Wanting something while knowing you shouldn’t have it. Sometimes I’m more interested in the moment before giving in the tension, the possibility, the little thought of “what if I actually did?” I loved poking around the edges and not actually get into it but keep wanting to. Then at last eventually end it.

And then there’s infatuation. I think it’s fascinating how easily the mind can turn someone into something extraordinary. You barely know them, yet suddenly every tiny detail feels meaningful. Maybe sometimes we don’t fall for people. We fall for the feeling of falling. It happens to me all the time, Imaginations take me to places.

I just wanted to put it here to know if anyone else is crazy about these stuff the way I am.

May be Im sick in head or something

This is going to be a long story so bear with me. Im looking on some perspective on this where I can see what my sisters think about this.
So I am 29M and got married last November to 24M. It was an arranged setup where we got engaged in July 2024 so there was an approximate 15 month engagement period.
So for context, I am from a family where I am the youngest and have a married brother 35M. My wife is the eldest in her family having a younger brother and youngest sister.

The engagement period.
Before the engagement, we met each other just a week or two prior and started talking to each other. Nothing very special but we did talk about priorities and what to expect and I specifically asked her if she was into the marriage or not, because consent matters a lot to me. Her parents wanted to marry her with me from the get go where my parents and I went to her place for the first time and they were the ones pushing for a quick engagement (we do live 5minutes drive away from each other). I took a few days, did istikhara and everything was fine where I kept a little distance from talking and she was very talkative over text (we couldnt meet each other much as my job takes me to far off places as deployment). At that time, she was studying in a well off university (in terms of expenses). She was a little shaky, as you would expect women to be nervous regarding such a big step in their life. However, a month into it her birthday comes and since Im far away I couldnt manage a birthday surprise as per her expectations and my parents aren’t so good with gifts. From her birthday, she started becoming distant and barely talked to me, expressing her disappointment with mine and my families gifts. At the time, I was suffering from a severe infection and was admitted in a hospital at my deployment location.
Her mother had been a very frequent communicator with me where she would text me, call me and tell me about her and her family. Her mother told me how she was disappointed with the gift so I sent her two gifts in the next two weeks through a friend which were quite expensive to make up for it. She then started to be a little better but then asked me for “space”, i.e. not to talk to her for a few days which eventually became a week. Come september, I went on leave to my home and we were fine, we met each other, went on drives and everything seemed fine for a few months as you would expect an engaged couple to be.
So in January 2025, I am deployed to a closer location and the time comes to decide dates for the wedding. We discuss with her father who is a little confused at first but we settle for November 2025. She starts telling me jokingly that we should reconsider, maybe delay for a year or two and what not but for no reason, just that she is confused. Things go to and fro and everything is routine for another few months.
Moving to July/August 2025, wedding dates come nearer and we are starting preparations where I am deployed to another location which is maybe 6 hours away. She again starts jokingly saying that she wants to delay but does not give I reason. I ask her what the issue is but she doesnt tell me, but she is very normal and really attached to me judging by her frequent texts and videocalls which do bother me at that time but we meet up once Im on leave, we go on drive or I visit her home where her family is very forthcoming and really treats me a bit too much.

Pre Wedding Phase
A month** before **the wedding, she starts to become distant and completely stops contact with me. I try to approach her and her parents but they say everythings fine and she is just anxious, and I believe them since every girl would be in this stage. I reassure her, and try to tell her that everything would be fine and its too late to cancel the venue and tickets for her and mine family coming from abroad for the wedding and she reluctantly agrees. As per her parents, she increases her dose of anti-depressants but she remains slightly distant from me throughout. The pre wedding events begin and we both get busy with our side of the families.

Wedding
So when the Mehndi / Nikkah happens, she is very shaky and nervous. I comfort her the best I can and her family surround her, not letting anyone know of her condition. She is very much concerned about her friends coming and doesnt even invite them, or even tell them beforehand that she is getting married!
While signing the nikkah papers, I see that her signature is shaky and her family tells me later on that her brother held her hand to sign it.
She goes to her home, nervous and crying and I comfort her the best I can.
That night, her mother has a vertigo attack and is admitted in hospital and remains there for three weeks.
The day of the Wedding/ Barat, I pick her up from the Salon and she is fine, we go to the photoshoot venue and yet again things are fine aside from the nervousness. Once we go to the wedding venue, her mother barely arrives for half an hour and has to go back to her hospital. But I do notice that she is concerned about her friends being there. We go to the hotel room we had booked (she wanted to spend a few nights at the hotel instead of my house) and her whole family, literally her cousins and aunts come to accompany her and remove the makeup and the dress. This does concern me a bit but considering her mothers situation, it seems fine. No intimacy that night since she is on her period.
The next morning, we wake up and I go to the washroom. Coming out, I see her crying after checking her phone and comfort her and ask her whats wrong. She goes on to tell me that she doesnt want to go with the Walima and Im really taken aback with that. I comfort her, tell her its ok nothing is going to happen and that it would not be fine not having the walima since everything is planned.
I call her father and aunt and take her to her home, visibly shaken myself about whats going on. She reluctantly agrees after a few hours so I take her to the salon with her cousin, then the shoot and then the venue where things go fine without an issue. That night, she tells me that she doesnt want to spend the night with me at the hotel and wants to go home so considering the situation, I say ok and let her be. My family does not have an idea about whats going on as I dont tell them considering what they would think about it.

Post Wedding
She continues to spend her time at her home, with us going out for drive or meet her mother at the hospital for a few hours. And she remains distant.
4 days after the marriage, we have to go on our honeymoon and she asks me if she can take her cousin and sister along for “moral support”. Yet again, I agree to make her comfortable considering the situation.
We go for 3 days together, with her cousin and sister in one room and us in another yet she does spend most of the time with them.
On the second night, I ask her to tell me candidly whats wrong because things are not fine. She tells me that she has “attachment issues” and that she had a previous relationship which didnt turn out well so she needs time. Im visibly taken aback and concerned. So, upon return I go to her father and ask him to meet me. Then I meet both her parents who say that she is just making excuses.
I try to comfort her any way I can and be there for her yet all this time she remains secretive and hides her phone from me (continues to this day).
Then, one day her parents force her to spend the night with me at my home. We spend the night and the next day she tells me to drop her at the hospital. I drop her off and she texts me that she does not want this. Her parents are forcing her to spend time with me and that way everything will backfire. So yet again, I say ok, take your time and relax, Ill be there for you. Things go on the same way where we meet daily for an hour so but no spending the night.
Fast forward to end of december while my wife is away, i open her mothers laptop as she asked me to install a software. Whatsapp is open and i see her texts to her mother complaining “only your choice can be this cheap and dirty” and then a comment on a photo of us together “i wish it was xyz (name of another guy)”. Im visibly taken aback and I confront her and her family where she tells me that this is the same guy she told me about and blah blah. Her parents keep saying that its an excuse and she is not involved or whatever. Still, I dont tell my parents.
Things settle down a bit, I move away and keep telling her to stay with me but she hardly comes for 7 months (only two time, and one time with her cousin and sister). We have our fights where she either wants to visit abroad with her friends, or want something too expensive etc. Even when I come on Eid, I have to fight her to spend time with me. And during this time, intimacy is bare minimum as she is totally uninterested and makes excuses for everytime we are together.
I confront her about her attachment with her past relationship and she gaslights me for being too controlling and manipulative so I eventually stop about it. The fight spirals to almost a seperation and I tell my parents and thats the first time they know about it. But I stop telling them later on so they do not have resentment with her once she does come. I do regularly talk to her parents about concerns but they try to assure me, telling me that they have tried everything, they start praising me for bearing with her and everything and what not.
I send her on an umrah with her friend in February 2026 and thins do seem to get better, then I take her on another umrah with myself in July 2026 but we keep having fights during that as well.
Fast forward to our return, I am now deployed to my home city and live at my place. But still, after almost a year she barely comes to spend time with me and in a month, we only spend a few nights together. She makes time for her cousins and her friends, prioritizing their plans over ours and our fights have become more frequent.

For the past two weeks, I have sat her down and expressed my concerns about her backing off of her commitment/promise to spend time together over excuses and spending more time with her friends and cousins than me, her husband. I feel to have lost connection with my family and friends because I always wanted to spend more time with my wife. I feel like that she only contacts me when she needs something and is still involved with someone( yet i Dont have proof apart from her behaviour). I have been contemplating divorce but I cannot get over the fact that I have to answer to Allah over it and the stigma attached with it.
I recently confronted her father, meeting him alone and expressing my concerns to what he replied that I have two choices, either to trust in Allah to change her heart or end it, its my choice. Yet I feel her parents keep hiding something from me, even though they do tell me a lot of things which the girls parents so not occasionally mention.
I feel isolated, emotionally drained and feel like I am being punished for unknown reasons. I see other couples and I feel sad seeing them together, spending time together without a lot of expenditure and in routine activities where she wants to only do things which take a lot of expenditure.
In her defense, my wife said that she has anxiety and cannot leave her room. She does take medicines since a few years and does not spend a night over at her friends or cousins, only her room. She has improved herself as compared to last year but I feel that the real love is missing. I literally have to beg her to spend time with me.
She works for only a short time which is online teaching and is not completely dependent on me, takes pocket money from me (I still give it to her and handle the expenses once she is with me) and her father as well.

I require a physiatrist for my girl (fiancée). She is suffering from chronic depression and anxiety. It’s effecting her sleep, meals and even daily habits

Its out of my control she relies on me but i cant do anything to help het instead we argue on stupid shit every single day

My girl had some childhood trauma and her mother has stage 4 cancer and she lives alone in a hostel so i would want a female psychiatrist for her

She might need medication cause its really severe now so thats why a psychiatrist.

If someone can recommend one ill be grateful
Ill cover the cost but it shouldn’t be too expensive

My friend was in relationship with a man for like a year. The man was good loyal caring and was ready to introduce his family from start. My friend took some time before starting any rishta thing. She wanted to be sure. After around 1 year she was sure about and after talking to man he told her family about him.

But oh man oh man whats wrong with these man. First he was forcing her to marry in 2026 and now after she tells everyone about him he flipped and started saying things like "ni ni 2028 tk koi chance nhi hai, apki family bhut jaldi kar rahi hai, agr mere ghr walo ne kch kha to m kch nhi kar sakta phr mojhy na khna mere abu bemar h delay kry hmara visit, meri sisters ko ap itni pyari nhi lgi, dekh ly apka ghr sahi h na yh na ho meri family ko issue ho, mama kh rai h ap job ku nhi karti blah blah""

What is wrong with theseee man???

Some people will literally ask you to be their friend, and the next moment, they start acting like you owe them something. If you’re not okay with something, they’ll keep insisting as if you’re their property. If both people are okay with it, fine but HOW HARD IS IT TO UNDERSTAND THAT NO MEANS NO?!

And the moment you say no, they get offended and show their true colors. And that’s when you’re like… oh, so THAT was the fuss.

We need clean, affordable convenience stores across Pakistan, especially near universities and offices. Right now, students and workers have to eat unhygienic street food because there are no good options on the go. There are few Convenient stores in Karachi, which are not convenient at all; the food is overpriced, and people cannot buy it every day or whenever they want. We want easy, budget-friendly shops with fresh packaged food so people can grab a quick, healthy bite without spending too much money, this is avaialble around all over the world.

like: 711, CU etc

i love Pakistani food, but they are not healthy at all; eating everyday will make you sick and create cholesterol and BP problems, if there is any organization or rich party who need business idea, please consider this

i wanted to know how many people in this sub have married to someone who is from the west and what are some challenges they have faced/things i might overlook right now? for context i live in america as a student (background pashtun) & she is from el salvador but has basically lived her entire life here. i wanna know how your life is navigating stuff like religion, values, family relations etc. i’m personally very open minded about certain things and hopefully the people in this sub will too.

I’m 20F from Islamabad and honestly just need some outside opinions. About 6 months ago, I met this guy through Snapchat. We started talking and eventually he became someone I was pretty close with. He was older than me and used to spoil me with gifts and sometimes send me money when I was going through a tough situation. I never really asked for it, and I genuinely thought he was just being nice and never though too much about it.

This went on for around 6 months until he started wanting more from me. That’s when I realized maybe there were IRL expectations behind all the gifts and money. I wasn’t comfortable with that, so I ended things.

Now I keep wondering if I should feel guilty for accepting everything he gave me. I never promised him anything, and I didn’t know he expected something in return. So was I wrong for accepting his help, or am I overthinking this?

I’ve been married for a year and honestly, I feel so emotionally drained.
There’s basically no emotional connection between us anymore. My husband doesn’t really talk to me or share things with me. He’ll discuss even the smallest things with his family, but when it comes to me, I feel like he has nothing to say. Even when I try to talk to him or ask him something, he barely pays attention. I don’t feel like I’m his person or someone he actually wants to share his life with.
He has never taken me on a proper date after marriage. We barely spend any quality time together, there’s hardly any affection or effort, and it feels more like we’re just living in the same house than actually being a married couple.
Our physical relationship is also barely once a month. I found out that he watches a lot of porn and was also using OnlyFans, and honestly, that really messed with me and made our already weak intimacy even worse.
For the past 20 days, we’ve barely spoken. He thinks I may have checked his phone, so he changed his password. Since then, he barely sleeps, spends most of his time on his phone laughing and texting, and basically ignores me. I don’t even know what he’s doing, but seeing him so engaged with his phone while completely distant from me hurts like hell.
I also feel like I’ve lost myself after marriage. I’m expected to handle the house, I’m not allowed to work, and I don’t have any financial independence. I don’t even get pocket money. I’ve spent so much time compromising and trying to keep everything together that I’m just tired now.
I keep thinking about leaving, but then I get scared. What am I supposed to do after leaving? How will I support myself? Where will I go? Will I regret it? I’m honestly terrified of starting my life over.
I recently graduated and have around 7 months of work experience, so I’m trying to figure out how I can become financially independent and have some sort of backup for myself.
What would you do if you were in my situation? Should I keep trying to make this marriage work, or should I start preparing myself to leave? I’m genuinely scared of what life will look like after leaving and could really use some honest advice.

Hi, everyone I am new here on Reddit. I would like to get some clean info about reddit 🤭. I am not genZ, not millennials but in between 💅. So suggest some good communities and tell where I need to be like careful ✌️.

. 

My wife left me because my job was going good but she couldn't find one. i am an anesthesiologist and she is a surgeon. 

we have been together for 7 years.

i don't know what went wrong,  i tried everything to keep her happy,  but on a slight inconvenience she would threaten to divorce me or leave me. I would do two jobs to just help her live comfortably but that would make her more angry that i don't spend time with her. But when i would take days off just to be with her and take care of her ,she would not talk , she would rather avoid me , i would ask her to go out but she would insist on not going anywhere.  she also gets extremely jealous of even her female cousins if they say pay attention to me. She would also never let me touch her cellphone.

i regularly go to gym, i am valedictorian on my college and am doing good in my carrier.  It got sometimes so worse that she would mind me going to gym. 

i used to be pretty popular with girls in my medical college president of societies and all, where i met her and after she became my girlfriend i never even talked to anyone else.  i totally changed the spark in me died. i accept that i have flaws , i may be short tempered , average looking  with high functioning ADHD but i don't think i ever harmed her emotionally or physically.  I am very close to her parents as well. But somehow she makes me feel lacking and say i dont care about her.

I have even left my guy friends circle because i would rather give my family time. but Alas.

the recent crashout between us was because of my job requiring me to go at a remote location for 2 months. I don't know what to do i am alone and being a man i don't have anyone to talk to or someone who can understand.

we started talking like 3 years ago and she was instantly interested in me. she continued persuading and eventually i fell for her too. after a few months we broke up cuz she had some issues w her. when that happened, i moved on for good. to an extent she became a regular person to me. then she came back in my life even tho i had her blocked from everywhere. and she told how insanely shes in love w me since and how despite multiple tries she failed to move on. i told her clearly that ive moved on aswell but she j doesn't trust. shes like shell do tahajjud and everything to get me back and i not even have any plans to marry. i j wanna leave her now but i cant cause she got depression and js suicidal and she tells im the only anchor for her and im emphatic as hell. idk what to do.

Mara baba na mujhe doo options dia Hain MBBS kro ya ap ko business kr ka data Hain mari sooch mai ACCA bh Hai plz ab mujhe seniors Sa guidance Chye ka mujhe Kia krna chye plz main bht worried hoon MBBS self pr krwana chahta Hain mara baba mujhe Sa plz seniors guide

Just wondering if miracles happen.

My father has always been a narcissist I've known that since I was a child. My parents had a love marriage that turned into something really bad and I wanted them to get a divorce when I was old enough to understand stuff but they never took that decision. Now everuday its so hard to have a normal conversation with my father. It was my dear dream to move abroad and get admission but I couldn't last year because my parents said no don't move abroad etc etc. Then comes my father in march telling me to apply to universities abroad, why aren't you applying, go to saudia, dubai, USA, taking literally all country names. And all scholarships do end their application by December max January. And i wasn't able to apply because i didn't had ilets as well. I got admission in masters at nust and fast. Now I literally have my first day of university next week and he's not happy. He's constantly just picking at me. As if I'm a loser. I've always been a high achiever, got a job the next day of my last paper in BS, don't take money from them at all, started my own business which he's again not supportive of. At this point I literally feel like running away, I've even told my mother to just get me married maybe I can have some peace. I'm so frustrated, everyone around him would tell him how good your daughters are, how good your wife is and he'll say the opposite. Tell us to look at his friends daughters and wife. Well those friends are being a good father and a husband. My mother takes care of his father day and night. And yet he's not grateful at all.

just goes to show how sexually frustrated this awaam is. i wanted to look for some audiobooks and came across this gem.

I am dealing with an extremely abusive family forcing me into marriage. I need a temporary marriage of convenience within the next few months with a gay man facing the same pressure.

There will be no photos or functions. Just a simple, quiet Nikkah.

He needs to be financially stable (to convince my family easily) and able to host me for roughly a year, until I save enough money to move out. I am an introvert and live very simply. I will repay the living expenses later and can also handle cooking and chores.

I have no other option and they are pressuring me. I don't want to marry anyone genuinely. My family will also give me some cash if I marry, which can help me gain my independence.

Putting this out here to cross paths with someone in the same situation.

Conservative and religious people, please stay away.

EDIT: Stop DMing me asking if there is another way. Yes, there is, if someone gives me a ton of money to live independently I can run away from my house lol

I’m 18 from Pakistan and have wanted to travel abroad for years. I constantly watch videos about Europe, America, Asia, life abroad, immigration, different cultures, etc.

This isn't really about taking a vacation. I want to experience another country for myself and figure out whether I actually like life abroad or whether I've romanticized it through YouTube.

I recently got my first international trip confirmed: 8 days in Baku, Azerbaijan.

The financial situation

I currently have 436,800 PKR saved.

I'll receive around 100k PKR this month, bringing me to about 536,800 PKR.

The Baku package costs approximately 260,000 PKR.

I also need around $700 in cash/funds, so after everything my accessible savings could become quite low. I'll receive another ~100k the following month, so I'd potentially have around 180–200k left depending on how the cash requirement works.

My income is also currently unstable. I previously had months around 350k PKR, but I'm currently around 100k.

Why everyone says NO

My father is extremely worried about safety. He keeps warning me about scams, kidnapping, human trafficking, etc., and even told me that if I go, he won't talk to me.

My colleagues are against it for a different reason.

They think I should put the money into my business/client acquisition instead.

I already spent 100k PKR on Upwork trying to get clients and got zero clients, so I'm hesitant to throw more money into another uncertain investment.

Their argument is basically:

And honestly, I understand their point.

But here's my problem

I've been saying "I'll travel next year" for years.

I'm scared that next year becomes 2 years, then 5 years.

I don't have major responsibilities at 18, and I genuinely want to experience the world while I'm young.

I'm not trying to prove that Pakistan is bad or that abroad is better.

I simply want to see for myself.

Maybe I go to Baku and realize I love being abroad.

Maybe I realize I actually prefer Pakistan.

Maybe I love traveling but wouldn't want to live abroad.

I don't know — and that's exactly why I want to experience it.

So what would you do?

Would you:

1. Go to Baku now and come back focused on rebuilding your income?

2. Cancel it, save the money, and travel after becoming financially stable?

I'm especially interested in hearing from people who took their first international trip young.

Did it change how you saw the world? Did it make you want to travel more, or did it actually help you understand what you wanted?

I m28 was randomly scrolling on instagram. I found out cats are lactose intolerant. they can die by drinking milk. Since early age i have habit of giving stray cats milk as a sadqah and they drink it without any issue. i came to know they seem to like milk but its harmful for them they don't know it. since then i am feeling very down and upset. i may have killed so many cats. What should i do? any advise for what should i do?.

jazakallah