r/polyamoryR4R Jul 15 '26

ANNOUNCEMENT: Rule 3 Clarification

75 Upvotes

There seems to be some confusion around this rule, and it eats up the vast majority of Mod time. So I'll try and spell out how the rule is currently being enforced.

If you are posting as a couple with the expectation that the new person will date both of you, then you are breaking the rule. If your post suggest this, you are breaking the rule. If your post looks like it might be a "bait and switch," you are breaking the rule.

The only posts that might be accepted are where one couple shares an account but they are looking separately. Honestly that smells strongly of being far to enmeshed and will likely (but not definitely) result in your post being removed.

If you are single and post looking for two people e.g. M4FF or F4MM your post will be removed. That is def facto harem building. This is a poly sub so we know people have, or would like to have, multiple partners.

I can already hear the hew and cry that we let singles look for couples but not the other way around. Yes, that is the unhappy compromise. Some people will only learn the stove is hot once they touch it.

As a final note, given how much time this eats up, NO your post is NOT the exception. If you want to know why this is the way it is, go and browse the main Polyamory Subreddit.


r/polyamoryR4R Mar 27 '23

Recent Rule Changes [Discussion]

100 Upvotes

In an effort to improve things and crack down on spam and abuse, there have been some changes to the rules and I’ve listed the new rules below. Please feel free to review the rules and my comments on each and provide feedback. I’ll leave this post up for a week or so for discussion, and then I’ll make a new sticky post for the community.

Rule 1. 18 years of age and older

This subreddit is 18+. Do not post, comment, or PM OPs if you or your partner(s) are under the age of 18. Lying about your age, or someone else’s age, will result in a permanent ban.

This one is self-explanatory. There have been Redditors who are minors, or have partners who are minors, who have made posts here. I want to make it clear that posts involving minors are prohibited.

Rule 2. Must be aligned with Polyamory

Polyamory is the practice of, or desire for, ethical romantic relationships with more than one person with the informed consent of all partners involved.

Posts or comments seeking sex, hookups, FWB, affair partners, “sugar” or GFE arrangements, or anything other than ethical polyamorous relationships with the consent of all partners are not allowed. There are R4R and other dating subreddits out there for just about anything. If you’re not polyamorous, please use a subreddit that is better-suited for your search.

This should go without saying…this subreddit is intended for polyamorous people seeking polyamorous relationships. This is not a general ENM dating subreddit, a regular R4R subreddit, a BDSM subreddit, or a subreddit for seeking any other kind of relationship other than an ethical polyamorous one. Going forward, if a post even includes “I’m also down for hookups or FWB” or something similar, it’s going to be removed. There’s nothing necessarily wrong with most of the arrangements mentioned above that someone might seek, but this isn’t the subreddit to advertise for those things. Also, if someone makes a post that seems like it’s not aligned with polyamory and their post history shows that it’s the same post they’ve cross-posted or spammed across multiple subreddits with minor changes to circumvent the intention of the rule, the post will be removed.

Rule 3. No unicorn hunting or harem building

Posts or comments that can be construed as seeking or promoting relationships where unethical or unfair rules or expectations will be placed on a new partner are not allowed.

This has been the most contentious issue on this subreddit so far, as it has been on other subreddits and forums. We’re not going to prohibit couples seeking partners in this subreddit. There are single people here seeking triads, throuples, and all sorts of dynamics. Triads and other group relationships can be amazing, especially if they are formed organically. That being said, there will be more moderation on couples seeking posts going forward, which will be done on a case-by-case basis.

The purpose of the mod team here is to protect the members of the subreddit and the integrity of the community we’ve built here. It is not the mod team's place to tell adults what they can or cannot do with their relationship dynamics. The reality is that we are all consenting adults and have adult decisions to make in our lives and in our relationships.

In an effort to prevent the subreddit from being a platform for predatory behavior, any no or low effort posts or comments from Redditors that indicate a general lack of regard for any potential individuals involved will be removed. For example, if an individual posts from a new Reddit account something to the effect of, "We're new to polyamory. We want to find a third who will date only us and be an equal member of our new family. We can start out long distance, but we will expect you to move in with us at some point. Prefer that you be submissive," the post will be removed. Read the room. Show that you're actually putting some thought and effort into it, and not just objectifying people.

Also, if you say that this new person is going to be an equal member of the family after you've just said that the person is going to be required to date both of you, recognize that the person you're seeking is not actually going to be an equal member of the family. If there's a possibility that one member of the existing couple loses interest and the new member of the relationship is forced to leave entirely...you have now misled this hypothetical new person into an unethical dynamic on them.

Rule 4. No hate or disrespect

Threats, harassment, abuse, bigotry, misogyny, misandry, and intolerance are not allowed. This includes, but is not limited to, attacks on gender or sexual identity, racism, sexism, slut shaming, mocking, and attacks on political or religious beliefs.

I don't need to go into detail on this rule. Don't be a jerk. If you don't like what someone has to say, block them. If you think someone is breaking a rule, report them.

Rule 5. No vulgarity or NSFW content

Vulgarity and NSFW content are not allowed. There’s nothing inherently wrong with sex, kinks, fetishes, and BDSM. However, posts and comments explaining the details of your sexual anatomy, favorite sexual positions, details and/or lists of kinks or fetishes, etc. will be removed. You can indicate that you are into BDSM and encourage people to DM you about the details.

There is often a large crossover between ethical non-monogamy and BDSM, sex positivity, etc. There's nothing inherently wrong with any of it, but this is not a NSFW subreddit. It's fine to include that you're sex positive, into BDSM, or whatever. If you go into detail and start describing anatomy/body parts, listing off kinks, and things like that, your submission will be removed. If you want to discuss these things, please do so in a DM.

The mod team has been asked why this subreddit is marked NSFW. The subreddit is 18+, so it's automatically identified as a NSFW subreddit.

Rule 6. No spam

You are allowed to post once every 7 days, with the exception of correction posts following an Automod removal. If you are found to be repeatedly deleting your post history in an attempt to circumvent this rule, it may result in a permanent ban. For clarification, spam includes copy-pasted and cross-posted ads from other subreddits.

This one is self-explanatory.

Rule 7. No Trolling or unsolicited discussion

There are a multitude of dynamics and ways to practice polyamory, and not everyone will agree on everything. Do not clutter up posts with unsolicited information. For education and discussions about polyamory, please visit r/Polyamory. If you believe someone is breaking a rule, please report the behavior and/or contact the mod team.

Again, if you think someone is breaking a rule, report it. If you disagree with what someone is commenting or posting, block them. Please don't engage in negative interactions on posts.

Rule 8. No personal or confidential information

Posting personal or confidential information about yourself or others in public is not allowed. If you wish to provide contact information for yourself, please do so in a DM.

Posting Snapchat, Instagram, phone numbers, or any other personal contact or confidential information about yourself or others in public is prohibited. If you want to give someone your contact information, do it in a DM. If it happens once, it will be removed and you will be warned. If you're found to be spamming your contact information all over the place, it could result in an immediate permanent ban.

Rule 9. No seeking relationships for others

Posts seeking relationships for someone other than yourself, or you and your partner(s), are not allowed. If your friend or partner is seeking a relationship separately, they must make the submission themselves.

I've seen posts where Redditors are seeking relationships for their partners or others, sometimes even doing it as a sort of surprise for their partner. If someone is seeking a relationship, they need to post for themselves. Your partner not having a Reddit account is not a valid reason to violate this rule.

Also, a general note for when you engage with the mod team. We have to wade through a lot of reports and posts here. Sometimes there are misunderstandings or mistakes are made. If your post or comment gets removed, or you are banned for violating a rule and you wish to appeal, you can do so via a Modmail. If you send a Modmail insulting the mods, you're only confirming that you're not the type of person who belongs on this subreddit. No amount of insulting or cursing a moderator is going to help your cause.


r/polyamoryR4R 2h ago

Canada 27 [F4M] Canada/ Long Distance - Slightly Gender Non-Conforming Dreamer Looking for Her Multidimensional Gentle Giant

3 Upvotes

DISCLAIMER: wasnt sure if I should post on here but who knows, maybe I'll get better results. But fine if you have poly experience.

Looking to be with a cis man. My age range is 25-35. But hey if you're 37 and wanna test your luck go for it. Photos are on my profile Pic literally scroll. Please be prepared to send a photo as well either in your initial message through imgur or when I accept your chat request. Its so awkward to talk to someone then days later they send a photo and you're not attracted.

Well if this title and post caught your attention then click on my profile page and while your scrolling to see my photo you can go ahead and read the long ( go ahead and grab a snack), post I made, literally same title. And I find if I sound like your cup of tea say hey.


r/polyamoryR4R 5h ago

42 [M4R] West Coast / Long Distance — Solo Poly, Outdoorsy, Looking for a Slow Burn

3 Upvotes

Hey there.

I'm 42, male, and solo poly/non-partnered. I'm putting this out there because I'd really like to meet someone new and see if we can build a genuine connection.

I'm looking for a connection that has room to grow. Maybe it starts with friendship. Maybe we become close friends. Maybe there's eventually a romantic or deeper connection. I'm not interested in forcing a label onto something before we know what it is. I'm definitely a slow-burn kind of person—I'd rather let familiarity, trust, affection, and chemistry develop naturally.

I'm open to people mid-20s to mid-50s. I'm much more interested in personality and compatibility than a particular number.

I'm also neurodivergent, and I tend to connect best with other neurodivergent people. There's something really nice about being around someone who just gets it—where neither person has to constantly explain why their brain works the way it does.

As far as attraction goes, I'm generally drawn to feminine/femme people—women, trans women, and non-binary people who lean feminine. I'm pretty masculine myself, and I tend to be attracted to people with a distinctly feminine energy or presentation.

I'm on the West Coast and would ideally like to meet someone else on the West Coast as well. I'm primarily interested in a long-distance connection to start, but being within reasonable reach of each other makes getting to know one another—and potentially meeting someday—a lot more realistic. I'm happy to start online and see where things go.

I'm a pretty outdoorsy person, and being outside is a big part of my life. I enjoy riding my bicycle, exploring, and finding reasons to get out and go somewhere. I'm also a hands-on, creative person. I enjoy reselling, sewing, creating artwork, fixing things, and figuring out how things work. I like having projects, working with my hands, and finding ways to give things a second life.

I'm hoping to find someone where conversation just flows—where we can be silly together, have meaningful conversations, share random thoughts, and eventually feel comfortable reaching out simply because we wanted to hear from each other.

If this catches your attention, tell me a little about yourself. What are you into? What makes you laugh? What gets you excited? What's something you could talk about for hours?

Give me something to work with besides "hey." 😉

Maybe we'll click. Maybe we'll become friends. Maybe it'll become something neither of us expected.

I'm looking forward to finding out.


r/polyamoryR4R 4h ago

38 [M4F] #Europe #Germany #Online | Demisexual looking for a genuine connection

3 Upvotes

Hey,

I'm 38, from Germany, married, and looking to build a genuine connection alongside my existing relationship. I'm open to friendship or something that develops into more, depending on the connection and what feels right for both of us.

I've been practicing polyamory for several years, and one of the things I value most about it is that relationships don't have to replace each other to become meaningful. Different connections can have their own place in our lives, and I'd like to find someone with whom I can build something that feels significant in its own right.

I'm demisexual, so emotional connection matters a great deal to me. I tend to connect best when two people are genuinely curious about each other, communicate openly, and gradually become part of each other's everyday lives.

For me, that doesn't necessarily mean constant messaging or intensity. I like the quieter parts of connection too: sending someone a photo because it made you think of them, sharing something funny or completely random, checking in after an important day, celebrating each other's successes, or simply knowing what's going on in each other's lives.

I'd rather invest in one connection that has the potential to grow than spend my time having lots of conversations that never really go anywhere. When I care about someone, I like being emotionally present and making space for the relationship rather than treating it as something to pick up whenever it's convenient.

A little about me: I'm a language teacher and naturally curious about people. Outside of work, music has been part of my life for as long as I can remember. I've played piano and violin since childhood and have sung in choirs for years. I love the combination of individual expression and creating something together, and the feeling of community that can grow around music.

I also play chess competitively, enjoy photography, gaming, history, psychology, languages, and travelling. I'm probably at my happiest in conversations that start somewhere completely ordinary and then unexpectedly turn into something much deeper.

I'm affectionate once there's mutual comfort, and I value kindness, emotional openness, reciprocity, and being able to communicate honestly about what we want and need.

I'm open to an online or long-distance connection within Europe if the connection is right. Physical distance is much easier for me than emotional distance.

If any of this resonates with you, I'd genuinely like to hear about you. What kind of connection are you hoping to find, and what tends to make someone feel close to you?


r/polyamoryR4R 3h ago

USA 41 [F4M] #US -I am looking for a sincere relationship

2 Upvotes

I am 41 years old and currently reside in the United States. I have a cheerful and optimistic personality and believe that the most beautiful part of life is meeting the right person and sharing life's joys and wonders together.

I love traveling, reading, listening to music, and exploring nature. I cherish the little things in life, such as deep conversations, walks by a lake, or precious moments spent with my loved one.

I value kindness, respect, trust, and honest communication, and I long to build a supportive and mutually beneficial relationship. I hope to find someone willing to work towards a genuine connection.

If you also live in the United States and yearn for a sincere relationship, I look forward to hearing from you.


r/polyamoryR4R 48m ago

USA 37 [M4F] Mobile, Alabama - seeking fun and loving primary.

Upvotes

Hello, my name is Rex. I'm 37, cis male, seeking a primary partner. I want to find someone to do the day to day with like cooking, cleaning, relaxing, etc. Someone I can look forward to seeing a majority of my evenings. Ultimately I would want a nesting partner, but that would come in time.

I have a bunch of hobbies and things I enjoy. I'm more of a geek and enjoy things like anime, gaming, sci-fi and fantasy movies and shows. I'm really a sucker for a good story and deep character development. I also like collecting: funko pops, Pokemon, Magic the Gathering and scale figures. I recently bought an amazing gaming PC/set-up, I'm quite proud of it. I also enjoy game nights and spending time with my friends and chosen family. I'm heavily involved in BDSM and attend demos/parties regularly. I do enjoy the occasional kayaking trip and vacation as well. I stay busy, especially as of late, between work and play.

I currently have 1 partner, she's married and lives with her husband. They are fully aware and supportive of me seeking out a primary partner. I have no kids, have been married once and ideally would like to find a primary partner with no kids as well. I'd prefer to find someone that doesn't smoke, vape, or do any drugs. Drinking socially is ok, but I really don't want someone dependant on a substance.

Feel free to send me a message if you are close or within the general area. I'm not looking for long distance and would like to actively go on dates and spend time together. Thanks for reading!


r/polyamoryR4R 1h ago

50 [M4F] VA DMV US - Looking for something intentional

Upvotes

Hi everyone. I am 50/M from Northern VA and looking to make new connections with someone in the DMV area. I am ENM and Polyamorous. I'm also open to long distance for the right connection, but would really like to focus on locals first. I am a huge romantic and have a big heart with lots of love to share.

I am married to my platonic nesting partner but am looking for another partner. I would love to build something long term and lasting, but I want to build a connection naturally.

I am 5'10", bald with a beard and have blue eyes. I am on the heavier side and have a dad bod, so please be ok with that.

I'm not into hookups or casual intimacy and tend to fall slightly demisexual. I need some sort of connection before physical intimacy. I have some curiosity for kink as well.

I love physical touch such as cuddling, holding hands, hugging and kissing. I am a huge geek and love video games, movies, comics and books. I enjoy crafting and trying new hobbies and activities. I am ok with outdoor activities but also enjoy quiet nights in with cuddles on the couch, movies and popcorn

I love deep conversations where we just don't want to stop talking. I want to smile when I see a message from you knowing that you'll smile just as much at my reply. I want to giggle and laugh about inside jokes. I want love and passion.

If this sounds like something you are also looking for, please DM me. I am happy to verify that I am who I am and hope that you will be open to it too!


r/polyamoryR4R 1h ago

USA 36 [T4R] Orange County - androgynous skater girl wants to connect

Upvotes

A bit about me:
She/they
Mental Health Therapist, reader and occasional video game player
Active Roller Derby player
Don’t have a space to host in.

I’ve gained a lot of curves, confidence and muscle the last few years and want to put all of those to good use ;)

Work is stressful and life is tough, I’m looking to connect with people who I can have a sexy flirty relationship with, who I can be friends with or at least enjoy being around.

  I’m love someone to go out with, have some nice food or drink ; maybe do a gym date, go skating or just hang out somewhere we can be more comfortable ;)

Be forward, be communicative :) don’t leave me guessing


r/polyamoryR4R 7h ago

USA 24 [M4MF] #Illinois or online looking for anything

3 Upvotes

Hi.

I’m a 24 year old bisexual guy living in Illinois. I have a type of autism called pandas (but you probably wouldn’t notice).

I like baking, listening to music, singing, playing guitar and piano, reading, going for walks, gardening, and watching sports.

I’m looking for a significant other/others. I’m interested in any kind of polyamory/throuples (m/m/f, m/f/f, m/m/m).

Age range 21-29.

I’m looking for someone sweet who has a good sense of humor and shares similar interests.

Feel free to reach out.


r/polyamoryR4R 7h ago

26 [M4F] Online - Just a guy curious about poly dynamics looking to be obsessed with you

2 Upvotes

Hey! I’m putting this out there because I’m looking for someone I can truly adore. I’m the type who loves to go all-in—showering you with undivided attention, genuine compliments, and all the "good stuff" that comes with being someone's number one fan.

The Dynamic

I am happy to connect with like-minded poly people and am open to be part of a relationship dynamic like that too

I’ve leaned into the submissive side of things for a while now, and I’m looking for someone who genuinely enjoys that dynamic. I can get pretty intense with my kinks (which we can dive into once we’re talking), but the foundation is always about that connection and devotion.

About Me

When I’m not exploring those dynamics, I’m a bit of a dork. I can be incredibly silly and lighthearted, though I definitely have the maturity to handle the "real world" when it’s time to be serious.

A few things I’m passionate about:

Huge football (soccer) fan, Big into anime and video games.

I love getting creative in the kitchen, hitting the trails for a hike, or planning the next travel destination.

What I’m Looking For

Ideally, I’d love to find a long-term connection, but I’m open to seeing where things go

If you’re looking to chat with someone who is ready to be crazy about you, shoot me a message and let's see if we click!


r/polyamoryR4R 7h ago

USA 36 [M4F] #Online, EST - Here is my random ramblings, hope to maybe find a friend and maybe a match?

2 Upvotes

Hiya! 

Well, I hope that you are doing well, and read this in good spirits! And it not, then maybe we can try and change it?

So, after some self exploring and searching, I feel I am coming to a point that maybe I know what I would like to find? I hope that maybe you fit this, and if so please feel free to reach out and say hi, and we can BS and talk shit. Lol.

About me,

First, I am a girl dad to 1, (2yo), so my time when I have her (Divorced) can be busy and hectic, so an understanding with that would be essential. I happily have her on a 2-2-3 schedule so every week is different.

I am your average looking guy, no six pack, no I don't go to the gym (maybe I should but, ugh I don't wanna), I have that dad bod thing going that I'm sure in time will get taken care of, but can't make me till then lol.

Things I enjoy can be ever changing with some short term memory on what I am wanting to do. I would say I am more of the nerd/dork kinda guy, but I do like sports, and played many before/ and worked in them.

I like to watch shows on science and space, I enjoy playing games when I can (rarely it seems), I also enjoy listening to audiobooks from Dungeon Crawler Carl ( finished book 7, holding off on 8 cause I need to pace myself lol), all the way to some yummy smut haha! yes, a guy who enjoys smut... I know lol. I also enjoy going fishing, cooking, being lazy AF, and doom scrolling when I should be doing something productive. Oh, also I bought a piano at goodwill cause I have always wanted to learn to play piano. (maybe one of those short term hobbies again lol).

What can I give? Hmm, that is hard to say, I am a really good listener, love to chat about anything, hear you out. I am never ever judgemental and will always say you are right in the fight ( well idk about if it was with me lol jk). Just ask me if there is anything you really desire or want in a friendship/connection and will gladly let you know if it is something I can give!

What I hope to find...? That is a good question, I know what I envision, and is that possible? Idk, maybe I am cray cray.

But..... What I picture... Is a woman who is confident, smart, sweet and caring, also loves the things I do and wants to talk about them and also their day and just BS and also give shit and be sarcastic and a smartass and can give and take on it. ( not in a way of to cover being mean, but be fun and snarky in a flirting way, if that makes sense?) I would really prefer a woman around my age, maybe a mom too or at least a fun aunt that understands the time it takes to be a good parent (fixing/healing inner child trauma, we don't judge lol).  I also really love and envision a woman who has that gothic style? The black dresses/clothes, tattoos, pericing, the type of woman that surely would have been burned at the stake lol. Which on that note... I would really like to learn about wicca/witch stuff. Something I have been finding myself drawn too. (blame the smut maybe lol).

I am also curious and wanting to learn, talk about, explore, understand ENM/Poly and throuple type dynamics.

Anyways, I was going to keep this short, but I failed that one I think. Welp sending this to the ether and will see what returns. If you got this far thank you, and I hope you have the most amazing day or night and always be good to yourself!


r/polyamoryR4R 9h ago

USA 39[F4A] #Rochester NY - EST Friendships + Local Rochester-Area Romance

2 Upvotes

Please give the full post a read before sliding into my PMs! Let's start things off on a positive note by making sure we're looking for the same things.

Looking to connect with steady, like-minded people for low-drama, ongoing text conversations. I am open to potential polyamorous relationships/romantic relationships with women, and looking for friendships only with men.

Looking for connections who are liberal, non-religious, and located in the Eastern Time zone (Maryland, Delaware, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, Vermont, New Hampshire, or Maine).

A little about me:

* 39, married to a trans woman (44), and a mom of 3.

* Demisexual (I only experience romantic or sexual attraction after forming a strong emotional bond first).

* Big into nature photography, hiking, writing, creative projects, and making ambient YouTube videos.

* Liberal, atheist, and neurodivergent-friendly.

* 420-friendly, vape nicotine, and take daily gummies for sleep/mood.

What I'm looking for:

* Age: 34–46.

* Dynamics: Women (for potential romance or friendship) or Men (for friendship only).

* Location & Romantic Boundary (Hard Rule): Anyone within the listed EST states is welcome for online chat/pen pal friendships. However, for potential romantic partners, you must live within a 30-minute drive of zip code 14625. If you are farther than 30 minutes away, it will strictly be an online friendship.

* Values: Liberal and non-religious (atheist/agnostic).

* Communication: Someone who appreciates consistent communication. I like building real, steady connections over text/messaging over time. I value peace and genuine connection, so inconsistency or game-playing isn't for me.

💬 How to reply:

If this sounds like your speed, send me a PM (please don't comment) with:

* Age.

* Gender.

* Your location (city/state or general proximity to 14625)

* Who you voted for in 2024.

* A short intro about yourself.

(Just trying to make sure we're on the same page and filter out bots and spam. No need to write a novel, just answer all 5 so I know you're real and literate.)


r/polyamoryR4R 11h ago

USA 49 [M4F] PA,US - Seeking connection and conversation.

2 Upvotes

In an active and happy relationship where both of us have room to explore(and are open about it) I’m seeking more of an online connection. I just want to chat , flirt, connect and really get to know someone.

I’m hoping there is someone in a similar situation. Open relationship but not wanting to dive into physical things or pressure of setting up dates.

I’m into music and it’s become a big part of my social and work life. I’m a free thinker enjoys exploring random topics. I a politically active and bet far left. I float between hobbies to keep me active.

I’m looking for someone who can keep the conversation moving. Someone interested in themselves as well as others. I want to create a real connection.

Enough rambling , send a note interested. Maybe favorite music ?

Age not important, I am not acting my age anytime soon. For this location is not that important.


r/polyamoryR4R 18h ago

USA 33 [F4F] Seeing who might be interested in a nerd like me

7 Upvotes

After a string of failed attempts at dating, I've decided to give Reddit a try. I'm a cis Bi girl with one partner and looking for my second. I'm looking mostly for women, but might entertain any femme-presenting person. I'm a gamer and lowkey a weeb, and Dragon Quest 11 is my hyperfixation. I'm a little scared to reach out so soon after my last failed attempt, so if I don't respond right away, please be patient.


r/polyamoryR4R 16h ago

USA 21 [F4A] #Georgia, US — Nocturnal girl looking for new connections

4 Upvotes

Hey y’all. It has been a day! I’m usually pretty much nocturnal anyway but this morning I had an emergency come up so I’m extra awake at 3am. Yay. Anyway, can’t sleep, and just looking for some new friends to distract me with their coolness in exchange for my coolness.

That said, here’s some things about me:

⚠️ I have a primary/nesting partner. He’s a dude, we have an age gap (he’s 45), and he’s not involved in what I do but is aware and supportive. We’re open to a “triad” or “quad” (if that’s what I mean to say, sorry) for the right person/people but right now this is just a me thing.

🏆 Love sports, mainly football and women’s basketball

🧠 ADHD (and probably a few other things)

🍳 Getting into cooking but not great at baking

🍃 420 friendly and frequent stoner, social drinker, quit nic three years ago

🔮 Childfree, not religious but I am a little spiritual and witchy, and I’m anti-maga

🎓 Communications major

🪞 Plus-sized, red (current) hair, glasses, pale skin. Just your average modern vampire.

💙 Super social, and a talker — if that wasn’t obvious by now.

🏳️‍🌈 If you want to know anything else, another cliché, just ask. I’m an open book, nothing is tmi, etc etc.

✨ Also want to add that I’m better with girls around my age, but older guys if that makes sense (hence the partner sitch). Don’t be afraid to reach out anyway, those are just patterns in my pattern-recognizing brain.

🌠 For anyone not scared off by now: Please don’t be a creep, please do be patient if I say something stupid, I’m pretty new to all this. That’s it though, just want to make some cool friends and kill this boredom. Thanks to everyone for being nice. :)

EDIT: Just realized people would probably be reading this after tonight, duh, so hey to everyone else and please reach out too!! Also adding this to say please message me with a quick intro or your asl so I have a baseline. That’s it foreal. Thanks again <3


r/polyamoryR4R 13h ago

USA 41 [M4F] ME/NH/MA — Seeking poly friend for outdoor/indoor adventure

2 Upvotes

I’m a happily married, secure, and adventurous guy, looking for a poly partner for outdoor adventures, fun dates, and loving intimacy. Willing to travel for the right connection! 💕

A little about me:
I’m married, with my partner since 2009, our relationship is very stable and secure, 2 kids.

I have a professional job in healthcare, but only work 3-4 days a week, so I am fairly flexible.

I’m into healthy living/wellness, vegetarian, I get up at 4am to exercise/sauna before work every day.

We have a homestead with a big garden, food producing perennials, sheep, ducks, chickens, cats, and a dog.

I’m into permaculture philosophy,
reframing problems,
the problem is the solution.

Health, safety, and transparency
are important to me,
including reg testing.

I’m vaccinated for everything I’m eligible for
(flu, covid, HBV, HPV, etc)

Lifelong ally 🌈
420 friendly 🌱


r/polyamoryR4R 21h ago

Australia and New Zealand 28 [M4F] - Brisbane - New connections

3 Upvotes

Hello there 👋

5”9 brown hair, brown eyes, fit.
Calm, Competent & Capable.

I am seeking new connections as I have just moved here for my work. Call it a new beginning in my life if you will!

A bit about me, I’m a gamer at heart. I play games like League of legends, minecraft, Pokémon, valheim, palworld, the Witcher, RDR2, Kingdom come deliverance & whatever the new current trendy game may be!

I enjoy gym and staying in shape, I have 2 beautiful dogs who take up my time, I’m also rather sporty. I like footy, soccer, tennis & golf. But really I’m just there for the good company.

You wont know unless ya try, right? I encourage you to reach out.


r/polyamoryR4R 17h ago

USA 25 [F4F] #Nevada / #Online - Friends or romantic connection

1 Upvotes

25F I do have a np 32M!

☆ Looking for a platonic to romantic relationship ☺️

About me: I'm very artsy, I draw a lot and dabble into crafts sometimes! I jump from hobby to hobby sometimes i play games and im always down to get into something different!

Id honestly love some more artsy crafty friends too 💖

If youd like to know about him: Very much into gaming, all different types of games too! Loves slapstick movies, godzilla, and the alien movies. Knows a lot about cars as well!

Anywhere near nevada would be great but online works as well if theres a chance of meeting !


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

24 [TF4F/TF] US, Canada, Online nerdy trans girl looking for a sweet relationship

4 Upvotes

Hi my name is Lizzy and I'm a 24 (soon to be 25) year old black trans woman, I'm 5'9 and around 220. I am also pre-hrt sadly and I'm looking for an empathetic and creative girlfriend. I'm currently single and enjoy a bunch of nerdy things like ttrpgs, video games, vtubers, and reading. I have an English degree and want to write my own books as well.

I would say that I'm sapphic and am fine with anyone who identifies as a woman or nonbinary fem leaning. While I prefer chubby/plus-sized women it is not a requirement. My age range is between 22-30 and I just want someone who I can listen to who is very passionate about their interests and is there emotionally.

I am currently in the central time zone and am looking for anyone in the US or Canada.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

USA 31 [M4F] #IL midwest anywhere sweet shy and simpy lets be each other's romance novel story?!

4 Upvotes

Hi! Golden retriever who's shy at first and then never shuts up 😂 I'm a jack of all trades who'll try anything once (as long as it's not like murder or anything 😅). I love nerdy things like games, dnd or anything fantasy-esque (romantasy anyone 👀).

Built like a book boyfriend who eats too much cake on the side. I blame my passion for cooking for that 😂

I play 3 instruments but guitar is my main one. I also do vocals as well that are more death metal based.

I'm into kink and while it is important to me, I do NOT want a relationship based on that, rather, a relationship that makes it even better. If you ARE curious though, feel free to ask about it ☺️

I'm looking for any dynamic that's long term. Not interesting in anything shorter term.

Please, please please be left leaning

No terfs, no homophobes, no racists

Save us time and don't message me if you voted for the cheeto

If we chat and you're not feeling it PLEASE let me know and I will do the same. Communication is key and I'm not a fan of caspers

Enm with a NP

Thank you for reading this, I hope you have an amazing day ☺️


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

31 [M4F] #Jacksonville/#FL/#Online/#US - Getting disheartened by the dating apps

3 Upvotes

I am looking for a connection with any femme person, whether that be friendship or more. While it would be ideal to find someone local, I'm happy to just have someone to talk to about life. I am a mostly introverted, have ADHD, and have a hard time in some social situations so finding partners IRL can be difficult for me simply because I have no clue when would be the appropriate time to flirt with someone, and the dating apps just feel so disheartening to me I am not sure how much longer I can stick it out. Openness, honesty and intelligence are very important to me. I am looking for someone who is willing to share their passions with me and allow me to share my passions with you. A little about me: I am 5'9" (if that is something that matters to you), and a little chubby, but working on it (I've lost about 40lbs this year already🎉). I love the outdoors, hiking, camping, overlanding, adventuring, gardening, all of it. My other passions include D&D(or TTRPGs generally), cars, reading, and cooking. I am currently completely single, but still happily live with my ex-NP, and we have shared custody of our 4 fur-babies, so do with that information what you will. If you have any other questions just DM me.


r/polyamoryR4R 1d ago

USA 37 [M4F] SW Ohio - couch potato romance

3 Upvotes

I'm not always sure about poly, but the one time I really enjoyed it was when I was seeing someone who initially met me in public for safety reasons, but eventually we settled into a comfortable LTR where we ate together, talked about life and work and our feelings, and watch new shows together. It was lovely. It didn't last forever, but it gave me hope someone else might like that too. If that might be you, keep reading.

I'm local to east Cincinnati, willing to drive up to an hour to meet someone (I am aware this is a long shot). I like a wide variety of anime, video games, books, shows and movies of all kinds. I enjoy talking about science, history, philosophy, psychology, and sharing about personal histories.

I'm just shy of 5'10" and hover between 180 and 185 pounds. I'm often called cute or handsome. I'm not shallow but I am looking for someone who we have an equal amount of attraction to one another.

I am hoping to avoid anyone who is not truly ready for a relationship. I have had too many experiences with avoidant/complex attachment people and would rather not repeat that. I go to therapy.

DM me. Hoping for a cute relationship with lots of fun, joy, and affection. :)