I have found no interest in the abrahamic gods or any religions basically but I still feel a need for guidance from a higher being or a sense of belonging so I decided as an act of defiance or
self love even that I am god to myself now and that I would basically have this belief system where I "worship" myself in the sense that I follow a moral code that makes sense to me and look up to my higher self as a source of wisdom and then feed my higher self wisdom so it can get wiser and wiser through educating myself , eating good food to stay sharp and working out , getting smarter and other acts of self love , I want to know more about such a belief system. Pretty sure I’m not the first person in history to pull something like this , does it have a name and where can I read about it ?

I give up. I’m not fighting against the universe anymore.

I think I got the message. I’m about to lose my driving licence, and I was going to contest it and try to save it. Then, while I was doing that, my tire blew out in the middle of nowhere, and I had to walk 9 km home.

I’m also letting go of someone who has clearly shown me that I’m not a priority anymore.

It is what it is. I’m not fighting anymore. I’ve accepted it. I guess I’ll just see what fate has in store for me.

this is not a religious post btw. Idk what it is tho sorry

I’ve gotten myself into a really bad existential hole, because a lot of spiritual beliefs have made life feel pointless to me.

I’ve heard these beliefs from different teachers and spiritual frameworks, so I guess maybe I shouldn’t be combining them. But these are the conclusions they lead me to.

1. If life is a simulation and nothing here is ultimately real, then there is no obvious point to doing anything.
A common explanation is that Source created all of this in order to experience itself.
But Source is everything. It already contains everything. If Source contains all possibilities, all experiences, and all of existence, then it does not need to learn anything through me.
And if this reality is basically Source imagining or simulating experience through individual souls, then none of this is actually happening in the way I would consider life real.
That leaves me with the conclusion that my actions, my life, and even my survival do not ultimately matter.

2. If every possibility already exists in different timelines or dimensions, then my choices lose their significance.
If every possible choice I could make is already being made somewhere, then nothing is actually being created by my decision here.
Every outcome already exists.
So whether I choose A or B, both realities exist anyway.
And if all possibilities already exist eternally within Source, then the idea that Source needs us to “experience” those possibilities makes even less sense to me. Source already contains the entire thing.

3. If everything comes from Source and eventually returns to Source, then individuality feels temporary and meaningless.
I exist as “me” for a while, then eventually return to Source.
If returning to Source means losing my separate individuality, then this individual person is ultimately disposable. I am one temporary expression among infinite expressions.
And if Source already contains everything, then I was never necessary in order for Source to know or possess my experiences.
That makes it difficult for me to understand why I, specifically, matter.
It also makes me feel incredibly alone.

4. The spiritual idea of a struggle between good and evil also seems contradictory.
People like Lee Harris, Bashar, Mariya, Dolores Cannon, etc. sometimes speak as though humanity is involved in a real movement from negative toward positive, or as though positive forces need to prevail.
But if everything comes from Source and everything ultimately just is, then negativity is also part of existence.
Good cannot permanently eliminate bad if both are expressions of a neutral, loving source.
There will always be both.
Which means suffering is not some temporary sacrifice we are eventually going to overcome for growth. It’s just this guaranteed fact built into existence itself. And sure you can avoid suffering by becoming detached from the story/emotions, but it’s still hard to go through even detached.

5. Manifestation creates a different contradiction.
The Law of Attraction and teachings like Bashar’s say that our beliefs, state, frequency, or assumptions determine the reality we experience.
I can totally subscribe to “if I have a positive/deserving mindset and take aligned action, then I can attract wealth/good relationships/etc.”
But they make it seem like I’m living in a world where the Holocaust, Palestinian genocide, and Trump happened just because there’s something in me reflecting that reality into the world, and all I need to do is believe differently to quantum jump into a different dimension where none of it happened.
And if that is not what manifestation means, then there is actually an objective reality outside of my beliefs that I do not control.

I used to have a belief system based on “there is no point, and we all create our purposes. We have free will, and after we die we choose to reincarnate or bop around doing something else. We’re all very much real individuals. Source is just another word for energy and not some conscious creator. There is no bad, because once you’re dead you see there’s no need for bad behaviors, and by default the energy/everything is love.” But learning these new beliefs over time have gotten me confused and all of this has made life stop feeling real to me. Are the people around me real, or part of whatever reality my consciousness is generating? And is my consciousness even real, or something made up by source?

I’ve experienced what I would call “enlightenment” before, where everything felt incredibly vivid and I embraced “nothingness” with love and creativity/possibility. So I know these same kinds of ideas do not have to feel nihilistic to me.
But right now they do. Right now, “nothingness” feels lonely. Oneness and nothingness makes everything feel pointless. And I don’t know how to get back to what felt like truth. Also, I do take breaks from thinking about it, try to distract myself, and accept that I don’t need to know, but these same quarrels keep coming up over multiple years.

The idea that life is an illusion makes reality feel fake.
The idea that every possibility already exists makes choice feel meaningless.
The idea that everything is Source makes me feel interchangeable rather than supported.

Please, don’t give answers like “What even is real?” or “The human mind isn’t capable of understanding this.”
I think I need these concepts broken down plainly and literally. Explain to me like I’m 5.
I think a major reason I ended up here is that I tried to make sense of a lot of vague spiritual phrases without ever getting a precise definition of what their specific vocabulary was referencing with nuance.

Does this happen to anyone else? If so how do you overcome it?

I manifested my dreams coming true. And I should be thrilled - I am! My most important goals that I’ve worked my entire life to achieve are finally here.

Except, now that they are within reach, I’m absolutely sick. I feel so scared. I’m so grateful but I’ve never felt more terrified, I actually cried when I got the news today. Not from joy but from anxiety. It’s like my body (or ego?) is actively rejecting the things I spent my entire life working towards now that they are in my hands.

It’s as if you spend your entire life wishing to be on a boat, and suddenly you wake up as the captain of a cruise ship. Yes it’s something I’ve always wanted so badly. But now that it’s in my reality, I don’t know how to have the confidence and optimism to fully enjoy it and expand on it. I feel like, “what the f did I do“ and I don’t know how to overcome this. I don’t want to sabotage this. It’s not a bad thing, I guess I’m just scared? I don’t know.

Anyone have any advice?

In spiritual spaces, the “gender war" is often related to releasing anger for one another. 

TLDR: women do not want war, we want vocal acknowledgment that the patriarchy exists and benefits some, while harming others.

When told to release my anger about the subject, it feels a lot like standing on a busy subway while being repeatedly groped by those around you, while everyone else looks away. When limits are reached and you yell, "Stop it!” Finally, someone looks up and says, “Don't be angry, it's not spiritual.”

Even calling it a gender war is detrimental. First, it trains us to treat people as players on a team instead of as individuals. We pick a side by looking at what's between our legs. We then collect stories and “data" that confirm the team we've already picked. 

I have been guilty of this myself. I have thrown out statistics, true and researched ones, to raise my “batting average,” because it often feels like numbers are the only real defense I have that does not require going low. I do not want to become someone who manipulates and harms men for advantage. The facts can still be right and still be used as team ammunition. I've realized that feeling like you have to swing that way is part of the problem, not proof you are winning.

Like politics, we've turned sexism into a team sport. 

The REAL truth is, we should be taking each and every act as done by an individual, and not a gender. There should be no scorekeeping. We should all just be on “team human”.

Most women do not assume all men will be violent or treat us badly. Most men we meet are not that. 

Yet, we also realize that we have always lived in a patriarchal culture. And that is what we need acknowledged most from the men in our lives.

Women are not outside the culture. We reward status, excuse cruelty in our own circle, and sometimes treat men as providers or opponents instead of people. That is not a free pass for anyone.

The patriarchal culture started long ago, so a reality driven woman should put no blame on a man for that culture existing.  But a man should be comfortable enough in himself to be able to acknowledge what that culture has benefited him with, as well as how it has harmed women.

Simply, the part that actually divides us is when men will not admit that this culture exists. This is the CRUX of the issue for so many women. When men see another man being awful, cruel, degrading, predatory, or dismissive, too many stay silent. They look at the floor or change the subject, as if calling him out would mean calling themselves out. A good woman should also stand up for the man being harmed, not leave him to keep score by himself.

Men often bring up the times they have been hurt by women as a counterpoint to a testimony of trauma. That pain is real. Yet, it does not cancel the duty in front of them. Protecting your team, or protecting your self-image, is not the same as protecting the person being harmed.

This is why so many women get upset over the “battle" comments. It's because not standing up for others as individuals is actually a FAILURE OF CONSCIENCE, not a war. 

As humans, one of our greatest needs is to be believed and given acknowledgement of our pain. But we have to do that by each individual case, without comparison. We've all been hurt, we've all suffered trauma. But it's the denying of that trauma because we associate with one gender or the other, or we are on the " winning team" is devastating and extremely dividing in spiritual and worldly spaces. 

Only when this reality is acknowledged can open communication and true healing begin.

Hiii! Today i came across the term ego and i was wondering what it was and how does it work in spirituality?

Love, Luella

Can we achieve higher state of self with the help of tantrism sex?

Because sex is something bodily..

And higher state of self is surpassing all those things.

Idk recently. i feel like i used to be a god, but i am here now for a reason : Is it saving people, or is it punishment, or is it something else idk but for some reason researching portals and how to make dimensions resonates with my soul. Does anyone have any advice. Oh also recently i had my skin look like i had scales on the top of my whole hand like it was indented all on the top which looked like scales when i was just at my computer concentrating on my research for my project.

So i am aiming to sit in the lotus position right now i just do crossed leg sitting up straight until i can reach lotus.

I meditate for 10-15 minutes, i don’t like short meditation sessions

but whenever i meditate one of foot goes to sleep, my back hurts trying to sit up straight, i guess i’ve struggled with posture from sitting down all day (I am 19 btw)

I’ve started yoga to help with this but i don’t know, my muscles feel weak.

Its frustrating because i feel i can’t go deep into meditation nor visualize and bring my attention where i want it.

I know people might just say to lay down and meditate but that is not the correct meditation pose, I just need advice on learning to sit in the position without any sort of pain

I know I can trust my butt. When I’m in a situation and my butt hole clenches it’s a big sign from the universe.
Usually I’m free and happy…but if I’m in a situation that isn’t so…I’m clenched. Nothing passes through. I didn’t have to train or anything, it just is. So now I’m wondering why does my butt hole always steer me in the right way.? When it’s loose I know I’m being guided from the heavens. Love my butt.

I know random things happen, but I’ve been wondering how often we call something bad luck when we’re actually repeating the same decisions without realizing it. Different people, different situations, somehow the same outcome.
Has anyone ever noticed this in their own life?

I don’t even mean this in a romantic way it’s definitely scary to me because I have always had a son in my dreams , I don’t really know who the boy was , but I thought it was my son , it was a baby boy when I first met him we had the exact same age in my dream. Then I would meet him randomly in other dreams and he was the clearest person I ever dreamed of. Especially since his features are quite uncommon where I am from. He is a blonde blue eyed little boy with a red nose who didn’t speak much and we were looking for his mom in every dream.

I met my boyfriend and we had a very instant connection , the first thing I said when I met him for the first time was “I miss you" and then I apologized and said sorry that was weird , and recently he showed me a picture of himself as a baby and I instantly remembered that boy , looked strikingly similar especially the nose like I could’ve sworn it was him. I am not really religious but this is weirding me out like I am genuinely tripping why does my boyfriend look like a random baby I see in my dreams sometimes does anyone know if this is a thing what’s going on. I can’t stop thinking about it.

Llevo un tiempo dándole vueltas a esto y quería ponerlo aquí a ver qué piensan.

Me di cuenta de que tengo una versión de mí para el trabajo, otra para mi familia, otra para mis amigos más cercanos, y hasta una distinta cuando estoy con mi pareja. Ninguna es falsa exactamente, es más como que me ajusto según el contexto sin darme cuenta.

Pero el otro día estaba completamente solo, sin nadie a quién ajustarme, y me costó reconocer qué quedaba ahí. Como si hubiera pasado tanto tiempo actuando distintas versiones que perdí de vista cuál era la de base.

¿Les ha pasado? ¿Cómo hacen para reconectar con esa versión que no depende de quién los está viendo?

So I know this is extreme anxiety but why? It feels like I have an existential crisis and scary intrusive thoughts of nothing being real or everything out to get me? I had my spiritual awakening back in 2024 and alothough it was scary it was so liberating and beautiful to know we are all one. But recently out of nowhere, I’ve had thoughts of doom. It’s so scary when this happens almost like I feel that god abondended me in this world full of suffering and hate. Why is this happening to me and how do I resolve this. I’m aware this is me not being grounded at the moment but since I’ve never experienced anything like this what could it mean?

I feel stuck in life and nothing has been going in my favor for a couple of years but I fear it is due to me experiencing karma for things I’ve done in the past. When I was in my early 20s I made mistakes and acted out of impulse & emotion when the version of myself now would not. I was so stupid and have a lot of regrets. I’m now entering my late 20s and am wondering if it’s possible to still be experiencing karma for those mistakes? Is that what could be keeping me in this loop?

If it is because of karma when does it end?

(just to preface im pretty new to spirituality)

Throughout my life I’ve always been the type of person that never had anything for granted. I’m not necessarily talking about big stuff, but even things such as finding a 5$ bill on the ground. I never had those “small lucky moments”. But I feel like its been getting worse.

Recently in my academic life I’ve been VERY and I mean VERY unlucky. I started college last year and gor assigned the worst professors, my classmate/friend sadly passed and overall I started being seen by some of my professors in a very bad light. I look at other students at the same university who had the luck of having normal classmates and great professors. I must only wonder why. I know this might sound dumb and unimportant, but truly it has impacted my life so much and my way of explaining it might not be the best.

Nonetheless, there’s recently been a bunch of things happening to me that have no apparent cause and that can only prove that my luck is inexistent. This feels bigger than just coincidences. How could this be explained from a spiritual perspective?

When you set a time for yourself and a task for yourself and you fail miserably trying to accomplish the certain tasks in certain times that you’ve set for yourself?
How do you not hate yourself be forgiving and kind to yourself?
Specially while you are also dealing with chronic illness and trauma and all of these mixed together with adhd and other neurodivergent issues?
How to accept that this is how I am and one can never function like “normal people” how can we give this complete
acceptance?
I’ve realised that no matter how much someone with adhd tries, they can never seem to reverse their autism or adhd, so how is this going to be forever unfair to live in this society where you’ll never fit in probably and being okay with it?

Does anyone have a take on what this could be or had a similar experience? I had a dream about my close friend being killed, when I woke up I checked up on her and she says she was completely fine. A couple of hours after, I found a dead bird (blue tit) in the corner of my room, I thought it was a toy at first because of how neatly its wings were folded but then I realised it must have flew in at night and just died. I couldn’t shake the strange feeling from the dream and the bird on top of that is strange.

I am currently being hijacked by what I would call an infestation of parasitic energies manifesting in different forms. They are a group of humans using me as a battery source. The energy is like a poisonous infection. It starts as a hijacking of my consciousness and spreads throughout my bodily sensations.

Can anyone recommend a healer which deals specifically with subconscious hijacking, and parasitic poisoning?

Let's run a little fun experiment: let's get to know each other based on archetypes and symbols. In the era of digitalization, it's becoming harder and harder to get to know each other better. We tend to make superficial connections on social media by swiping or just seeing external false ego-driven experiences. And getting to know someone's internal world just happens to be extremely difficult, even in person when conversations about our life are so empty and shallow.

Let's try this for a change. If you had to list a bunch of archetypes / symbols for each major area of your life, what objects would you choose? The major areas of one's life, I believe would be:

• Spiritual
• Material/Career
• Dreams
• Hobbies
• Shadows (things you hate about yourself or others!)
• Passions (inner child / what did you like or want to be as a child, and what do you like now)
• Emotions and Personality

Then based on these symbols. Can you infer how this person is like? What are their dreams and aspirations? What his/her current life looks like or what they want to achieve in life? Let's pretend these major areas of your life are rooms in your house, and you need to decorate them. What objects would you choose for each room? I will attempt to read your inner world based on the symbols you choose. Anyone interested?

I will start:

• Spiritual:
  1. A rug on the floor with a Mandala drawing
  2. A painting of fractal geometry
  3. An altar
  4. A canvas painting of Lakshmi
  5. A ganesha figure
  6. A Yoga mat on the floor
  7. A book about the occult
  8. Some Tarot Cards
• Material/Career:
  1. A Suitcase
  2. A suit
  3. Cash on a marble table
  4. A bitcoin cold storage wallet
  5. A Gaming PC
  6. A software code on a laptop
  7. A computer with a monitor showing an image of someone breaking a chain
• Dreams:
  1. A buddha figure on a table
  2. An image of an Aphrodite
  3. An image of a beautiful goddess
• Shadows:
  1. A painting on the wall of a businessmen accumulating money while laughing at others' misfortune
• Hobbies:
  1. A Tennis Racquet
• Passions (Inner child - what did I like as a child?):
  1. A video game console (Nintendo Console)
  2. A Chessboard on a table
  3. A desk with a microscope and some electronics equipment (breadboard, soldering iron etc)
• Emotions / Personality
  1. An image of a warrior

I believe the symbols we choose to represent ourselves will show our shadows, fears, aspirations and dreams much better than a normal conversation.

Feel free to try to read my inner world, how do I perceive myself, and shoot your symbols if you are interested in me readings yours!