Came back to campus after summer break. The cafeteria's a mess. Instead of a friendly man with a sense of humor to take your order and make sure you get the right thing, or fellow students managing the counter you can share some camaraderie with, there's now a screen you order and pay from while people who won't even look at you make your food. They don't even call your number. You get a text when it's done. The sassy lady who ran the coffee spot and knew all the regulars' names, test day orders, and and would always wish you good luck? Gone and replaced with the same shit.

The info desk no longer has people 80% of the time. There's a kiosk with an AI mascot that begs you to chat with it instead. The round tables perfect for groups have disappeared in favor of long rectangular ones spaced so you can only talk to friends directly across from/next to you unless you yell. The supply and textbook store got turned into the largest 'quiet' space on campus (We have a lot of them already. There's also many peaceful, hidden places around that aren't hard to find.) and now you get spammed with emails about getting all your items online.

Even appointments made in person are now waiting in line to use a touchscreen, so if you have questions good luck. You can't even leave your number to call in case an earlier slot opens up anymore. On top of it all, a solid chunk of classes I need got moved to being online only, which 90% of the time means a mess of prerecorded lectures with zero ways to discuss or ask questions crafted by people who don't check their email. I used to genuinely enjoy it here and now it just feels like like a depressing grind because all those bright little moments of human connection are gone and there's less reliable ways to gain a better understanding of course material due to lack of direct feedback. Why was that necessary to do? This shit sucks. Wish me luck I guess.

I want go:( why everyone in where i live dont even go outside of their homes

..

Please read everything before commenting. I don't want create hate, I just want talk about this problem.

Lately, I've had the impression that, like with autistic people, those with depression, and others, introverts have also found themselves surrounded by people who loudly proclaim their introversion to be interesting and never question themselves. I hate it because many people use this as a justification for simply being mean and rude, while also harming both introverts and extroverts.

I see more and more people like this, just being rude and mean. A former friend of mine did this to justify not being polite, never speaking, or speaking curtly all the time. Or another friend who would stay with us but constantly sulk as if we had threatened his family if he didn't come!

Also, listening to some people, you'd think that introverts are just "poor little creatures" that extroverts force to go out and talk to people—boo!

It's normal not to want to talk to others sometimes, but it's becoming too easy to just pull out the magic label and act like a jerk! I've compared it to the "I'm just being honest" or "I don't want to be mean but—" types who claim to be honest and straightforward to justify talking to everyone like dirt. The same goes for those who claim to be "depressed" when they aren't, and who hurt those who actually are and have to deal with these stereotypes on top of their own problems.

In all cases, it harms the group in question. Let's stop this.

this for extroverts only!

does anyone else seem to attract lots of introverts bc they think ur easy to talk to. but when i try to get to know them they really don’t want to open up/cant hold the convo. even though they approached you first??

i know when to leave ppl alone in a convo buts it’s exhausting constantly attracting ppl who think it’s my job to make them feel more comfortable in social situations bc they can’t speak for themselves.

im always kind to everyone bc i was introverted growing up and i relate to them but i’ve grown out of it now. it’s really hard when you feel like you’ve evolved past smth but certain friends almost hold you back?

anyone else relate?

im a super extroverted person and I love people, and I have a lot of friends, of course many of whom are not close friends, but I still value them. how do other mega extroverts maintain their friendships with so many people while also having time for work/school/personal life?

For starters, I think I’m the definition of an extrovert—the kind you’d see on a TV show, haha. I love going out, chatting, meeting new people, partying, and so on. However, I recently realized while hanging out with friends that I seem to be attracted to introverts. Even though I usually prefer extroverted friends because we share the same vibe, the idea of ​​dating an introvert seems really interesting. It might be a bit of a cliché, but they give off a sense of calm—Yuri from Doki Doki Literature Club is a good example. It’s such a new feeling; can anyone explain it?

my bad if this has been discussed but i couldn’t find any posts discussing.

basically im extroverted by i feel SO drained by a boring conversation or a one sided one where im carrying the entire conversation. i want a give and take in a conversation and its kind of exhausting talking to introverts especially bc they just don’t open up no matter how much i try.

anyone relate?

Throughout life I’ve never felt like I’ve met anyone who’s matched my energy in my friendship group.

I’m always up for anything and don’t get the tiredness feeling that all of my friends seem to get. Give me a last minute gig, festival, beer garden, road trip, flight and I’m in my element, where I feel others always avoid it. I should add that my partner tries to match my energy and is generally up for most things but my attendance is never in doubt.

I also find it really frustrating when you have plans with friends and they say they’re tired and shorten plans when you’re out because of it, especially frustrating when you’re hyped up for it.

I’ve in the past few years found out I have ADHD and now wonder if I’m actually exhausting to all of my friends? Standard self sabotage routine of ‘do my friends dread my energy’.

Is it the friends I have or is everyone else not always up for fun? And does anyone else feel like this? It sort of leaves you feeling a bit lost at times despite having a large friend group.

I’m not sure whether I’d be classified as an "extrovert", but I do feel energised by talking to people and I struggle a lot with isolation, boredom, and lack of stimulation during the weekends. I also have diagnosed combined-type ADHD, so I think that adds to it.

How do people manage weekends when friends are not available very often, or only meet once every few weeks? I’ve tried going out alone and staying indoors, but neither really helps. Even sitting in a café with my laptop feels mentally draining and under-stimulating rather than enjoyable.

When I do meet friends, even if I felt low beforehand, I usually feel recharged and in a much better mood afterwards. So I think the issue is not just boredom, but lack of social connection. However, my friends are not reliable with meeting up.

My counsellor suggested mental health or talking therapy groups, but I’m not sure they would provide the kind of connection I’m looking for. I also don’t drive, which limits where I can go.

It feels like I’m stuck between ADHD-related boredom/lack of stimulation and needing more regular social interaction than I currently get.

I (18M) am currently between the end of highschool and the start of university and I noticed a while ago that if I didn’t meet with my friends during school breaks, after about a week I just got insanely low mood. I spent most of the summer with my closest friends and family and I had a blast, but since last weekend this week I haven’t been out of the house much because much of multiple factors, nothing serious it would just take long to go into detail abt it. but point is by today my mood is very low, wouldn’t say I’m depressed (as in actually going through an episode or whatever) but I just have this general feeling of hopelessness, which is funny because it’s literally been only 4 ish days without me going out (rest of the summer I was out and about every other day at least). The social connections also don’t need to be based around drinking and whatever for me to feel fine, I remember feeling extremely shitty by the end of last winter break and by the first afternoon that I was back at school and talking to my friends I felt like a person again.

Is this a more serious mental health thing or am I just an extrovert?
moreover is there anything I can do about this? There’s obviously going to be times like this in my adult life

edit: specified discrepancy between title and a detail in the text

I'm an extrovert and I've always liked parties, but none of my friends do, so I wanted to ask if you guys like parties, clubs, and things like that.

when i meet people who are too similar to me i feel like we just butt heads. there’s some irony in me being extroverted, and it’s that i have trouble both making and maintaining friendships.
i think the main reason for this is that i disproportionately reflect the energy that people give, so when im around other extroverts i get louder and more outgoing, but i end up talking a LOT more, so i end up acting more “annoying”. however, when im around more calm and mellow people (introverts coincidentally tend to be more calm and reserved) i choose my words more carefully, and i myself become far more calm and collected.
my girlfriend and my best (and only) friend are both introverts, and i feel like i get along better with them than i do with people who are more similar to me.

Best Party you've ever been to?

I'll start:

My freshman year of college, I was on foot often, exploring my city. Campus is built right into the heart of this city, so there was plenty to do at ALL times. My friends were buzzing about some flyers they'd found, and word of mouth from the older people I worked with at the time (They were the grizzled old age of 25-30 while I was a lowly 19 year old) made its way back to me and my wild friends.

Saturday, mid-summer, all day - Slaughterama. Bikes, bikes, and more bikes. Beer, beer, and more beer. On an island that sits in the middle of a river that carves through the city, only blocks away from campus.

Easily a thousand people there. It was like Mad Max - dust was kicked up everywhere. Crust punks, artists, musicians, and other unsavory riff raff all roamed around with music blaring, live music, and crazy events. There was tall-bike jousting, mud wrestling, kegs, ice baths, dogs, happy crowds... it as gloriously messy, one-of-a-kind event.

How about you?? Would love to hear some Extroverted perspectives in an Extroverted sub instead of sifting through the same old bullshit advice posts

Because I don't have friends to go out with I often go to events and things alone. Which is fine (?), I'm ok with being alone, and I can make small talk with people, but I'm struggling with how to approach people and talk to them.

What I've found is most people go to things with others, or meet their friends there. Meaning, there are groups of people all standing in their own little circles talking to each other, and trying to talk to a stranger would require walking up to the entire circle of people and interjecting yourself into their conversation.

(writing this after going to an event last night that maybe 10 people were at and I was the only one there that didn't know anyone. Talked to some people one on one, but basically everyone else was huddled in little groups the whole time.)

Any tips or advice would be amazing.

Ok so this is going to be a long one. Basically, today was my first day at my a levels college. I wish i could say that my day went so good, I talked with alot of people and made new friends but thatt sadly isn't true. I did talked to a few people and sat with one for all my classes but she isn't interesting. I think our personalitie sdo not match and she is also a introvert so i honestly did not enjoyed much.

I want to ask from the people who arre very freindly, have alot of friends like how do you make friends. And also those who used to be really shy but now are very confident. Like how did you guys stopped fearing intercations and being judged. I am honeslty so done with this. My whole school life i was the shyest, most quitest kid. I was never good at making friends neither talking with teachers. I think the reason for me not beibg able to amke friends and jsut not knowing how to tlak to people is beacuse, when i was in 2nd grade i made a friend and she was BESTTESTT friend. Like I never felt lonely with her, and i just stopped talkibg to my classmates and making new friends. But she changed schools in grade 7. And since then i am sturggling so bad. Its liek everyone else just naturally know how to talk and keep a conversation while i am just a baby in this thing.

I am not gonna say i had absolutely no change in me since nd grade. During my o levels, i became more confident, like i can talk to teachers and ask questions and things, once i get comfortable with them but i feel in the aspect of making friends i am still on square one.

I have so many questions in my head when I am talking to my classmates and new poeple my age. Like what if they find me boring, if i am not funny enough or i am just not equal to them. Especially if they already have friends, what if they feel badd why i am interfering. Or if theres a big friebd group, i cant approach them bc i think why would they even need me. They already ahve friends and it just feels wrong to me to try to make firends with epople who already have friends. I know this sounds so dumb abd childish but i really do think this. And I want to desperately change myself.

Well, sincerly thankyou if you guys read all of it. And if you guys can give me some advice.

Recently if not my whole life people are telling me weird stuff. Like my colleague told me I seem like I have very little friends and I don't go out. When I told my boss that he was harassing me she replied with he's just joking. He's an extrovert and you're an introvert. People always tell me that I'm quite and not communicative. I told my cousin that I wanted to go out with her in the bar and she said that I shouldn't be so fearful or she won't go out with me. It's like every time I'm trying to make a friend or start a conversation with someone they always harass me somehow. And I don't even want to start about how much comments I get about my appearance like I don't look my age, I look very pale and stuff like this. It's just if people would disrespect me I wouldn't have a desire to communicate with them. Like I wanna perceived normal and their comments make me so nervous and shy like what's their problem with me I don't understand.

I'm starting to feel like in today's world being extroverted is a disability. I went to one concert in June, one party in July. THAT IS ALL THAT HAPPENED in my social life over the last 4 months. I hate it, I activly suffer from it. It's been so hard getting people to do something. Also, the couple that has been our trip buddies, just split up, the other one just had a baby. I used to have a very tight close group of active friends, there was always something to do. Now I'm 32 and it's all dead. And nobody seems to care but me.

I just don't like cliques, and even if someone is very different from me and my circle,

snubbing them is rarely an option for me.

I don't think I am a people pleaser because I can be very openly critical of people, and very prim, but I cannot simply dismiss most people and refuse to acknowledge them.

Do people often think you are friends with all these people, when really you are following a gdneral rule of communication with other people?

I've found myself attached to introverts a lot. My current roommate and friend is an introvert. Lately I've started to realize how one sided all of these friendships have been. I've been making a lot more extroverted friends lately and it is SO much more fulfilling for me. I'm tired of the waiting for my introverted friends to actually make a move and do something. I'm tired of being the one to make their lives exciting while they do absolutely nothing to make mine exciting. It feels like they never actually want to do anything fun. I'm tired of pulling all of the weight in these friendships for absolutely nothing in return. I haven't had an introverted friend whose put an ounce of energy into our relationship. It feels like they just never want to do anything and I'm always making all of the decisions for us. I'm sick of doing all of the talking just for them to mutter an "mmmhmm" and when I ask them questions they have nothing to say before leaving because they're too "drained" to have a face to face conversation with me for more than five minutes. I'm sick of trying to cater to their not having any energy to speak and do anything and the constant tiptoeing. When I'm sad, they don't even try. But when they're sad, I'll move the moon for them to make them happy. They never miss me, they never communicate, I never know if they're mad at me or what. The introverted girl i'm closest with has none of her own friends outside of mine that I introduced her too. She latched on to an extroverted boyfriend when I started pulling away because she had no one to add people and fun to her life anymore. I'm over it. Maybe it's effed up, but I just don't think I want to be friends with introverts any longer.

All the ones I've taken have very much not really looked into the way a person recharges and more about "Do you find it easy to talk to people" or ask very generic questions. I'm tired of getting ambivert on every quiz.

Ps; I posted this on here because it was the first thing that came up ;P

My job mostly involves working alone with very little social interaction, so I try to use weekends to see friends and do things like bowling, arcades, eating out, day trips, or just hanging out.

I have ADHD and find it hard to enjoy spending time with people I don’t find interesting, so I struggle to make new friends. I mainly have three people who I hang out with often: A, U, and L.

A rarely meets up, but we message almost every day. U is responsive, but often cancels plans at the last minute, and I don’t really enjoy messaging him. L usually does meet up, but over the last year he has become very unreliable. He is often 30–60 minutes late and can take 2–3 days to reply to simple messages.

Recently, L and I bought passes for various attractions. We agreed to go to a theme park, and he said he would book his ticket. After two days with no response, I had to chase him, and eventually I cancelled my booking and suggested going next month instead. He agreed, but by this point I’ve lost a lot of trust in his reliability. Making plans with him often feels like a 3–5 day process because of how slowly he responds.

Because of all this, I’ve started spending more weekends at home, which I find boring and mentally draining, I crave social interaction. I sometimes try doing things alone, but I really don’t enjoy it. For example, I went to the zoo alone because nobody was available, and even though I normally love the zoo, I hated the experience.

I also don’t have a car, so travelling further away is difficult, and I don’t enjoy most local activities by myself.

I feel a bit stuck. My current friends are unreliable, but I also find it difficult to make new friends unless I genuinely find someone interesting. I’m not really sure what to do. I don't have a car, so going to these hobby clubs can be difficult too.

UPDATE: Agreed to go to this activity for today at 12:45/13:00 and I came here around that time but was expecting him to be late maybe by 30 mins, but I seem to have underestimated his punctuality and he’s just texted me saying he’s here at 14:15

im f23 and i have auadhd but im very extroverted and outgoing. i love trying new things and im just really not a homebody. however due to my neurogivergnce im not that good at talking to men in person especially sober lol. most people i’ve met on dating apps seem to be introverted no matter how i set up my profile. is there any way i can meet someone who will match my energy but not judge me🤷‍♀️

Hi fellow extroverts!

I often read posts everywhere analyzing the introverted world and how extroverts just can't understand it. We have that stereotype of adopting introverts, so I’m taking advantage of it—after a weekend spent at home that's driving me crazy—to complain about one thing:

How frustrating is it to be an extrovert surrounded mostly by introverts?

Our friend group used to have 11 people, so someone was always going out. But after a split, there are now mini-groups of introverts who just don't want to leave the house.

I know it's a need for them, so I’ve never interfered. But my own need for social recharging feels almost impossible to satisfy.

I’ve realized I get along better with introverts because they are very emotionally attuned and we always have deep conversations, but I need regular outings to feel good. I can't make a single outing per week be enough like they do.

I feel like I'm losing my mind when I'm alone; I don't feel happy or recharged.

I probably need to make new friends, which is usually pretty easy for me. But since it's August and everyone is on vacation, I just have to survive these next few days.

Maybe I'm being dramatic, but at least I'm demonstrating what happens to an extroverted brain without constant social interaction 🤣🤣

P.S. This only happened two days ago and I'm already like this.

What did you talk about? How did it go? Why was it memorable? They can be funny, serious, eye opening. Whatever still sticks in your brain to this day.