Hey everyone, I wanted to share a rhetorical tool I’ve been using at work that has been incredibly effective at completely shutting down ignorant commentary without putting myself on the defensive.
I don't talk about my personal life or my transition with the majority of my coworkers—it's frankly none of their business, and a few of them are serious "red pill" types. But lately, whenever the room starts making ignorant comments, I’ve been testing out a response that completely short-circuits their brains.
I just look them dead in the eye and say: "To be fair, everybody is a little trans."
They always pause and look at me like I've lost my mind. Then I explain the math and the scale.
Think of a scale from one to ten. A trans person who does hormones, surgery, and a legal name change would be a 10—the whole receipt. Extreme edition. But look at where everyone else falls on the lines under that.
Women are getting fillers and Botox so their face can “age like fine wine.” Men are lining up for TRT because their testosterone did what it naturally does after 40, and suddenly it’s a medical crisis instead of just Tuesday. Gym bros are reshaping their entire bodies with cycles, and half the country is on Ozempic because the body they have doesn't match how they want to feel.
It is ALL body-affirming care. They are changing their physical bodies to match who they want to be. But when they do it, it's called "wellness" and "self-care." Why is it only controversial when trans people do it?
Keeping myself out of the equation entirely forces them to actually think about their own bias and their bullshit. Watching their brains short-circuit when they realize they have absolutely no counterargument is pure comedy. They just look at me stunned and go, "...damn, he's right."
We can’t always be fighting them on their terms or staying on the defensive about this shit. It's time to start reflecting that mirror right back at them. Hopefully, this framework helps some of you handle stressful environments a bit easier!

If any of you have seen the first update you'll remember I said that I didn't inject into the muscle like I was supposed to, which is true. But the main reason why it hurt so bad has been revealed by my grandma who is a nurse.

I took 4 times my dose.

The vials say single use on them, so I assumed all the medicine in there was my dose, and I don't know how to read a syringe so I thought .25mL meant the number 2 on the vial. I drew up the entire vial. And shot it into my leg.

I didn't know that you only draw a portion of the vial and toss the rest. Oops. I injected 3-4 times my actual dose on accident. I learned my lesson, and my grandma now does my shots for me since I cannot trust myself to do them anymore until I learn properly. I am still in mild pain a whole week later, but it's gone down. Don't be me, take ur shots the right way.

Trans people’s right to legal gender recognition is much older than we realize—older than abortion rights, Alaska’s statehood, and the Civil Rights Act. That history just became common knowledge.

Write-up: https://www.transiticsnews.com/p/trans-peoples-identities-have-been

Full timeline: https://timeline.transiticsnews.com/

I’m monogamous, and after a string of failed relationships, i’ve been taking a break from dating.

my issue is that I don’t personally know any trans men who are in happy relationships that are monogamous. All of the happy trans men i’ve seen are in polyamorous relationships. Which I’m not hating on btw, but are there any monogamous trans men out there who are in happy relationships? Sometimes it feels like only the polyamorous people are happy :(

I just went to a public toilet at the mall and used the men’s one, the cleaning lady standing at the front yelled at me that the woman’s restroom is at the front. I didn’t turn around and just used the bathroom because why would I? I am no woman. (This felt like one of the biggest achievements ever)
Based on my looks and my voice, I could get misgendered easily but no one is surprised when I say I am a boy, also I was right behind my (very obvious male) boyfriend so I 100% knew I was omw to the men’s restroom

Anyway, she looked really embarrassed when I walked out without batting an eye at her but I am still definitely gonna report this

super curious how many of u guys want surgery, or if u only want one and maybe not the other, or no surgery at all! btw I know there are other masculinization surgeries, but I’d like to focus on top and bottom just because they’re so prominent in the community

for me, I used to really want top surgery but now I’m not so sure! I was never really too into bottom surgery and I don’t think I’ll ever get it. sometimes it makes me feel like less of a trans man bc I don’t want surgery, so I’m curious how many of yall feel similar to me

feel free to expand on how u feel in the comments!!

Just curious if theres people out there that genuinely like to pack? Like you're not interested in bottom surgery but you like to have a bulge so you pack? Ive been extremely self conscious about my packer because its not part of me but I at the same time I like how it looks and feels. I also started using stp and gotten pretty good at using it and I love it but again it feels off because its not attached to me. I dunno why I feel so weird accepting the fact that I actually like packing and it might be a better option then surgery for me 🤷🏻‍♂️

Hi, did anyone else not need any adaptation time after they got top surgery? It is like my chest has always been like this. I am actually surprised at my lack of reaction. I saw my chest for the first time i was like "👍". Its almost weird how i immediately integrated and got used to my new chest in 5 seconds. Actually it still surprise myself in the mirror sometimes, but only to have this "damn i look GOOD" reaction

okay so, not sure where to start, but generally how do you guys put bandiads on hairy legs or what type of bandaids are best to use???

i get ingrown hairs every now and then that get super angry so i put a pimple patch on top with a bandaid to secure it for the day (and to not have a gunk filled pimple patch facing the world lol). today i had to do that on my thigh and its still shorts season where i live, i had to take my hair trimmers and put my smallest guard on them to shave away extra fuzz that left me with an okay amount, but longer hairs still got caught in the bandaid too. now im frustrated thinking about how when i take these off itll rip out some of my legs hairs that may just bring in more angry ingrown hairs!? genuinely no clue if there if a solution to this, but kinda would like to be able to wear bandaids without it being like cartoony duck tape hair removal feeling shit. 😭

I think I may be a victim of fearmongering, cause I thought that hysterectomies were like a big deal super risky difficult surgery. Now I'm seeing a LOT of trans men casually mentioning their hysterectomies. Are they actually that dangerous? Do the pros outweigh the cons? What does it do for transmascs other than securing infertility? If there are good alternatives, what are they?

And another thing, how do you choose what to remove? Uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries, cervix.

Anyone who has done research and/or gotten one/something related, I'd love thoughts.

I've seen a few comments where people say they tried or used to when they were young, but I'm wondering if anyone else like me just always has.

I've always peed standing up for as long as I can remember. According to my mother I started copying my dad and brother peeing in the yard from the time I was toilet trained and did it into the toilet ever since I was tall enough.

When I was little I didn't need to hold anything, just point and shoot, and I was good at it, but some time around the start of puberty things changed and it slowly got messier and more unpredictable until I figured out how to hold everything correctly for a neat stream. That's how I have peed every day since. Occasionally because of my clothing I will sit or hover if it's easier, but it's just habit to stand after 30+ years.

Is this unusual?

i’m most likely enrolling in community college courses this spring, which is exciting because i’ve wanted to go for a while now, but i didn’t consider til now the fact that i have not changed my legal name yet, and most likely couldn’t do it before i enroll. Meaning, i will pretty much HAVE to out myself to all my professors and office staff to explain to them that im trans and not to use my deadname for any reason.

It’s also a pretty small community college in Texas of all places, and admittedly i’m in a blue county, but i fear that kinda means nothing when it comes to trans issues with how rampant transphobia is on both sides these days. Perhaps i’m being a little paranoid because of that, but i think it’s a valid fear when trans college students have been literally murdered for being openly trans. So i’d like to remain stealth to fellow classmates, but the only way i can do that is to ensure my professors aren’t going to out me.

I’m sure in actuality it won’t be that bad, and i’m sure most professors are educated and mature enough to just accept it and never bring it up again, but i can never be too sure and i’d like to know other people’s experiences with having to explain your identity to college professors and how that usually goes, and maybe just advice on how exactly to word the emails i’d have to send to them. thanks in advance for anyone who wishes to offer me peace of mind about this 👍

Nothing serious to say, just a yippee.

​

i love singing and my voice is just starting to change, so i figured i might as well try to find music/vocal inspirations who aren't just cis dudes.

however, almost every single trans guy in music that i saw recommended in other posts seems to not really be from the genre i'm interested in hearing (mostly seems like variations of bedroom pop/rock which i don't enjoy that much).

for context, some musicians and banfs i normally listen to: pearl jam, alice in chains, korn, linkin park, radiohead, soundgarden, jeff buckley, bauhaus, the cure, deftones, the offspring, will wood and the tapeworms. (tried to include some variation of diff vocal styles and voice types i enjoy).

ik it's somewhat older stuff but that's the general idea of what i'd like to hear some trans guys do and can never really find unfortunately :( i'm also open to anything that's on the louder side really.

i'd also prefer recommendations for singers who have already been on t a while and have a more 'passing' voice, and specifically trans men/transmascs, not just trans musicians in general.

i really hope stuff like what i'm looking for exists lmao and thx for the help yall!

I have pretty severe lower dysphoria, always have. It used to make me mad when people say they "got over it". I likened those types of statements to advocating for conversion therapy. until i realized that there is a distinction between social dysphoria and intrinsic dysphoria. social dysphoria comes from how others perceive traits as male or female. social dysphoria is somewhat malleable. If social expectations change, the dysphoria changes. height dysphoria is a good example of something that can generally be overcome by changing one's mindset. It doesnt make the dysphoria less real. We are perceived by others for most of our waking hours and obviously we want to be perceived as ourselves.

Intrinsic dysphoria is the primary mismatch between brain and body. if i was stranded on an island alone, i would still want metoidioplasty. I now know that many people have the opposite experience. so i think we can all afford to have a little more empathy regarding other people's dysphoria

Basically what the question says. Does anyone have experience with a cognitive dissonance like this? I don’t want Urethra Lengthening when getting phallo at all and I am super happy with that decision because complications and healing time will be easier. I don’t define myself or a man through peeing standing up. But somehow when my boyfriend pees standing up in public it is a MAJOR trigger for me and I get very dysphoric. Does anyone know what could be causing this? It is affecting me more than I’d like it to. Hope someone can share their experience.

This will probably sound strange, but walk with me. I'm a huge biology/oddities nerd (which sounds odd but they ARE related) and I've been referred for a full hysterectomy.

In short, I want to keep and preserve/jar the removed organs (particularly because I have PCOS/PMOS) but I'm aware this might not be possible without extra steps. I've heard of some using the reason of their personal religious burial practices requiring every body part for the burial process, but I'm not sure if that would work here as I've only ever heard of that happening in other places like the USA.

I'm just wondering if anyone here is Canadian and managed to keep their bits post hysterectomy. For reference, I'm in BC.

I work at a hospital in a college town that's in a red state. Im stealth. Multiple people that work in the hospital ableist, homophobic, and transphobic. No this hospital is not religious. One staff member in on their way to being fired for their horrible behavior, but that doesn't stop others. Upon my first week I learned someone in my very small department is phobic and ableist, but so is one of the psych nurses. The person in my department misgenders people when they aren't around. Today a nurse tried to request to change someone's sex in their chart because they hadn't had bottom surgery and I had to explain that we go based on the id and nothing else, which can suck for others. The system we currently use is in the dark ages and you have to actively look 3 pages into the chart to see if someone has a preferred name and their gender identity and sex assigned at birth. Even if they have a preferred name listed, it doesn't print on their face sheet or bracelet. All of this is super grating. Next year we move to a more up to date system which might help with names, but thats unclear. I want to push for some type of change and education for all staff but I dont know how to do that without outing myself. Thoughts and opinions would be greatly appreciated

for context im overweight but not obese im afraid that loosing weight and making my stomach smaller will make my chest more noticeable. my chest is small for someone overweight but medium ish overall (im a medium in spectrum) so its still slightly noticeable when I wear a shirt but blends in when I wear a jacket or an overshirt.

Anyone have experience with this? if it makes your chest more noticeable I think I'd rather wait a few years until top surgery.

I've done my shot myself twice now and each time the testosterone like leaks out of the injection site? what can I do to prevent this

I guess I wasn't paying attention at first but I'm doing my third t shot right now and my vial says to discard vial after one use. maybe I'm misunderstanding but is that true? I've used one vial for two doses, theyre 1 ml bottles and I'm doing 0.3 ml injections so the bottle gets two or three doses out of it?

I (21) am about 6 months on T and It's low-key so weird. I just graduated last month and have a full-time job, all while my hormones think I am 14. I have acne all over my body again, I am so wired all the time and then I just crash, sleeping for hours. It kind of feels like being the mom in Freaky Friday. I am in a child's body but have the mind of an (young) adult. It's just weird to think about, has anyone else experienced the same thoughts?