Im 18, ftm. I came out this year but i felt dysphoric for years prior. I feel good in being a guy, i feel happy when i get called he, when i look masculine, when i imagine myself on T.

The thing is, it's also taking a toll on me in a way. My parents make transphobic comments everyday, people look at me weirdly when i say im a guy but they hear my feminine voice, and most of all i feel like I'll never find a partner because of that.

I go both ways, but I'd say i have a preference for males, both trans and cis, but i feel like mainly cis males look down on ftms and from my experience most of them just sees me as a female and tries pushing the femininity back onto me.

I feel so upset about it, i feel like I don't fit in anywhere. I want to know whether i should stand by what's making me myself feel comfortable, or whether i should try and detransition.

Im so worried I wont be able to pull straight girls before surgery

Personally, it really does for me. I am a pisces, and it really bothers me to say that to people because it makes me feel more feminine. It's not like there are zero men born in march, but I can't really get over the weird feeling it gives me. I dunno if I'm alone in this so I wanted to ask.

TLDR; I'm 18, found out I can medically transition now and take T, but I'm scared because medically transitioning might affect other things going on in my life. But im also scared waiting would hinder my results that I want in the first place.

Hi, I turned 18 maybe a few months ago. I am very sorry if this is technically breaching the rules because while im asking for advice im also sharing some of my thoughts right now which might count as a vnt im not sure, but im not vnting im hoping to get some external feedback so I can come to a good conclusion for myself and I was thinking I should probably consult other men about this. Especially men who are more experienced than me.

Im closeted and still live my parents. I just had this sort of semi revelation that I can actually go get Medical help and HRT by myself since I am technically an adult now and my parents aren't required legally to be informed about it. But I'm also weirdly anxious.

I know I'm a guy, I've been out to my friends for years. But It's almost like I fear being forced to come out to those that I haven't come out to yet who are potentially dangerous to come out to. What if I get stripped of my opportunities (Parents paying for college)? What if I somehow change my mind about perhaps having children in the future.

I feel like I'm under a sort of time limit where I wouldn't get the results I want from my transition if I don't start now, especially because I am genuinely super short and I might have a hard time passing in the future. But then If I made a hasty decision I also have something to lose.

My dysphoria is more manageable than my other problems in life so it kinda adds to the guilt that If I decide now I might lose some thing. I know I will not miss being mistaken for a girl, or any part of how I was raised, but maybe I fear that I could lose the social privileges of pretending to be cis and navigating a world where a lot of people are kind of against me is really scary. I also heard that T as a hormone can mess with your ADHD which is something I have, and I fear it might affect my college grades. My other puberty was messy and I've associated it with my bad upbringing and i kinda don't wanna go through that again. Because mentally ive been in a better place now more than ever before, but im not sure how much my social transition to my friends has affected that or if it's just my puberty ending or that family stopped harassing me as much as a grew older. Dysphoria was just one of the problems in my life and I dealt with many other things that were more painful to me so it seems so pointless in comparison. I'm aware this is an unhealthy and misguided mentality but that's where I'm at right now.

At the end of it all I just want to live my life as I'm supposed to be and finally have what I feel to be expressed physically, outwards to other people.

But I live in two quite socially conservative countries and I'm thinking about my future. So I feel stuck. But maybe since it's something I plan on doing anyway at some point in my life I might as well start now.

I don't know, I probably sound really silly and naive right now, but I'm glad to receive any sort of input.

so for context im a nonpassing trans man (binary) dating a cis guy. he isnt the problem in this, hes great about it.

basically, my bf likes holding hands, laying on each other, kissing, general pda. i dont mind this stuff because im a very tactile person, but i hate thinking about it.

most of my problem stems from the fact that when people see us, they assume were in a straight relationship and that im a woman. obviously this isnt great, im short and have a round face and just generally look like a girl. but being with a man doesnt help because nobody assumes im just a fem dude, they assume girl.

it bothers me a lot because i dont want to make him sad by not holding his hand or anything, but i hate the idea that people see us together and assume im a girl more than they already do. i dont particularly care what others think of me in general, but being seen as a woman is what gets me.

anyway i dont know how to address this with myself, but i just want to stop being miserable every time my bf wants to hold my hand. any ways to make this stop or at least lessen?

Hey everyone, I wanted to share a rhetorical tool I’ve been using at work that has been incredibly effective at completely shutting down ignorant commentary without putting myself on the defensive.
I don't talk about my personal life or my transition with the majority of my coworkers—it's frankly none of their business, and a few of them are serious "red pill" types. But lately, whenever the room starts making ignorant comments, I’ve been testing out a response that completely short-circuits their brains.
I just look them dead in the eye and say: "To be fair, everybody is a little trans."
They always pause and look at me like I've lost my mind. Then I explain the math and the scale.
Think of a scale from one to ten. A trans person who does hormones, surgery, and a legal name change would be a 10—the whole receipt. Extreme edition. But look at where everyone else falls on the lines under that.
Women are getting fillers and Botox so their face can “age like fine wine.” Men are lining up for TRT because their testosterone did what it naturally does after 40, and suddenly it’s a medical crisis instead of just Tuesday. Gym bros are reshaping their entire bodies with cycles, and half the country is on Ozempic because the body they have doesn't match how they want to feel.
It is ALL body-affirming care. They are changing their physical bodies to match who they want to be. But when they do it, it's called "wellness" and "self-care." Why is it only controversial when trans people do it?
Keeping myself out of the equation entirely forces them to actually think about their own bias and their bullshit. Watching their brains short-circuit when they realize they have absolutely no counterargument is pure comedy. They just look at me stunned and go, "...damn, he's right."
We can’t always be fighting them on their terms or staying on the defensive about this shit. It's time to start reflecting that mirror right back at them. Hopefully, this framework helps some of you handle stressful environments a bit easier!

I've seen several studies that imply that masculinization or feminization of the fetus can occur, due to a surge of androgens or a lack thereof after sex formation in the fetus.

I recently heard that Studies have shown that stress during pregnancy and pre-eclampsia can masculinize typically female fetuses and feminize typically male fetuses in rats. Of course, not everyone who has gone through this will be cis or trans. Some may be the most gender-conforming cis person, GNC, or trans.

It also appears that testosterone levels are higher in women with pre-eclampsia, and since T is already high and placental dysfunction occurs, more T passes to the fetus.

This is definitely not the only explanation, but as someone who has shown signs of dysphoria since childhood, I wonder if this was one of the reasons that led me to become trans.

I wanted to know if anyone else experienced a turbulent period in the womb while they were with their mother.

I was born weighing two kilograms or less, while my length was normal for a fetus of that age.I was born prematurely at 8 months. My mother experienced stress at the beginning of her pregnancy, an attempted robbery (which must have been quite traumatic), and pre-eclampsia. My umbilical cord felt like it was tightening around my neck when they took me out of her, and I was also going into fetal distress (heart rate between 90-120).

I’m 16 ftm, started T maybe 4-5 months ago, but I keep having an urge to experiment in feminine clothing? But I’m worried people around me will start to think I’m detransitioning, and I also worry I will get misgendered more and such, I don’t want that at all, but I see feminine clothing that I’d like to wear and I WANT to, but I don’t want to ruin the view everyone around me has built up FROM me dressing masculine. And I know the short answer would be to wear what I’d like, but I’m worried it will ruin the stereotype I’ve built up FOR people to not misgender me… does that make sense? And what do I do?

I’m monogamous, and after a string of failed relationships, i’ve been taking a break from dating.

my issue is that I don’t personally know any trans men who are in happy relationships that are monogamous. All of the happy trans men i’ve seen are in polyamorous relationships. Which I’m not hating on btw, but are there any monogamous trans men out there who are in happy relationships? Sometimes it feels like only the polyamorous people are happy :(

okay so i didn’t really date ANYONE during highschool at all. there’s someone interested with me at college who is fab. I haven’t told her yet but i need advice on how to flirt and like…. what to do help pls

Hi, call me Matt. I'm 17 and in my final year of high school. Today was my first day back. I'm the child of a stay-at-home mom who writes letters every year regarding my given name (to not being deadname by my school etc) and getting support from the school staff about my trans identity. Despite my father's lack of approval, the school is willing to help me with this process, even if it's not official. Anyway, the student advisors at the school who are in charge of my class (and therefore also me) asked me how I could feel comfortable. They agreed that I could use the boys' locker room and bathroom, and the staff restroom if needed. (Absolutely, listen to this with all due respect. I'm not in the US, lol.) Anyway, towards the end of the day, I went to the men's restroom for the second time that day, and a group of boys (about 5) started talking in other voices when I closed the restroom door behind me, saying "Lost generation!" Another one shouted, "Argh! A trans person in the men's restroom!" and "So there's a girl here then?!" things like that. I was obviously uncomfortable and angry. When I came out, they were already in the courtyard. (There weren't many of us since it was during class time.) So, I just stared at them from a distance with a death stare and left a few minutes later to talk to one of my student advisors. She said she'd take it into account if it happened again because taking immediate action could make things worse rather than better, but the advisor was very supportive! But anyway. I'm a cis-passing student, and it's been four years since I adopted a male name and began my transition. Honestly, my only theory is that it's rumors or people from my school (before my transition) who told their friends to make fun of me because they didn't know my deadname.

Anyway, it bothers and stresses me out a lot. I don't want any trouble or for it to upset the students in my class, especially the boys. I'm fed up with the rumors and the teasing.

Any advice?

I have pretty severe lower dysphoria, always have. It used to make me mad when people say they "got over it". I likened those types of statements to advocating for conversion therapy. until i realized that there is a distinction between social dysphoria and intrinsic dysphoria. social dysphoria comes from how others perceive traits as male or female. social dysphoria is somewhat malleable. If social expectations change, the dysphoria changes. height dysphoria is a good example of something that can generally be overcome by changing one's mindset. It doesnt make the dysphoria less real. We are perceived by others for most of our waking hours and obviously we want to be perceived as ourselves.

Intrinsic dysphoria is the primary mismatch between brain and body. if i was stranded on an island alone, i would still want metoidioplasty. I now know that many people have the opposite experience. so i think we can all afford to have a little more empathy regarding other people's dysphoria

is there anyone who is or has taken finasteride to prevent bottom growth and dont plan to go off it? If anyone would be willing to share the side effects of taking fjnasteride like if it will disrupt my voice dropping or fat redistribution pls do.

[EDIT: thank you guys so much for the replies!! I appreciate the answers to my questions so much and I’m so nervous but excited I’m able to get this opportunity to start HRT, again thank you!!]

Hi guys Im Will and I’m 15 and I have some questions!! Some info first though

I’m from colombia so laws here are different to the US but I don’t know if it will affect much of this

so I recently came out to my mom and she’s supportive and (as of writing this) tomorrow I’m having an appointment with a therapist that specializes in gender identity and LGBTQ topics!!

My mom has said she isn’t completely sure I should do HRT at my age since I’m still growing and that maybe we should look into hormone blockers and such (with the help of a doctor ofc)

So first off, if I were to start HRT at my age, by any chance would my hips get narrower since I’m still sorta young? or does HRT just not affect hips in general? And would they also help with my thighs? (I’m delulu and very dysphoric about my hips and thighs 💔)

Second of all, About hormone blockers, would it just be blocking estrogen? or how does it work? And would they up my levels of testosterone?

And third, if I were to be on hormone blockers until I’m 18 and then start HRT, would there be any difference at what speed the changes would happen? Like would HRT act faster or slower?

I’m sorry if my questions make 0 sense English isn’t my first language and I’m not super fluent 😭

Hey guys. During first puberty my face puffed up a bunch but from like 20-21 really slimmed down. Now I'm almost 22, almost 9 months on T and my face is still so puffy. Will I ever get a defined face and jaw or am I just screwed? I used to have one before I started T but not anymore. Is it a weight thing? I'm 135 pounds I think at 4'11 but some of that is muscle. I think I was like 125 pounds before T

19M, almost 3yrs on T, post top-surgery

i'm currently looking into getting a hysto, but before i do that i'm also considering egg freezing. been reading a few anecdotes and looking up doctors, so i know the process can be expensive and lengthy and make you feel awful. however, i still have a few questions to ask, it would be helpful if anyone could respond!

1. did the hormones you needed to inject cause hip widening and breast growth if you're post-top surgery? these are my biggest fears, so i'll seriously reconsider getting my eggs frozen if hip widening and breast regrowth can occur.

2. for the gay guys, which are the clinics that allowed you to use a surrogate for IVF with your eggs? and also how did you find a willing surrogate in that case? i would prefer clinics in southeast asia or australia that allow this, but if that's impossible then i guess i'll travel further.

thank you in advance!

Hey guys!! I'm being switched to injections since my skin absorbs gel a little too well (I have hEDS), I'm with gendergp and they're switching me to sustanton, just wondering what comes with it and if there's anything I need to buy before switching? (Like needles, alcohol swabs etc)!