im very proud to be genderfluid, im glad i found something that works for me, but at the same time i... don't want to be like that... i really want to settle on something. i don't feel cis and i don't feel trans or anything in between, i know i'm genderfluid! there's no better way to describe how i feel. but i want to settle on a particular gender... im tired of everything constantly changing, i dont like it. but i cant do anything about it. because even if i told everyone that im not genderfluid anymore, but, for example, non-binary, id just be lying to myself. i feel different all the time, thats a fact, it cant be changed, but im so tired. i dont know what i want. can someone give me an advise or at least tell me its normal to have these kinds of thoughts... i feel like a weirdo even in a community i think i belong to 😞

Straightforward question, it's something I would like to clarify to myself because I don't have a neutral name (Victor).

If so, did you come up with a whole new name or nickname, or did you just invert the gender of your birth name? (I.e. Victor -> Victoria)

I have this issue that my whole personality changes when I feel like a boy vs a girl.. idk if it’s normal or not, so that’s why I’m asking. When I feel like a girl I identify as aroace because the thought of sex/romance icks me out, but the second I feel like a boy I get attracted to like everyone and I get a lot meaner than I am when I feel like a girl (I can’t help it I’ve tried being nicer but my attitude just changes). Can someone explain why this is?? It feels like I have 2 personas or something and it feels really cringe to think of.

She's my only friend. We've been friends for 5-6 months. She's amazing and we both enjoy and look forward to being around each other. I want to tell her I'm genderfluid (as well as aroace) but I'm nervous.

I've heard her say something supportive abt gay ppl in the past so that's a green flag. I'm just afraid if I come out that it would make things awkward. It could weaken or strengthen our relationship. I'm just scared of taking the risk.

Do you feel the need for self validation through your gender presentation when you're feeling a specific state? Be it through clothing, makeup, hairstyles, etc.

Or do you dress the same way regardless of your current state?

I see people describing what sounds like really big swings from one gender into another that I struggle to relate to. I lean more masc or more fem some days, but I rarely have thoughts on the level of, "Yeah, let's do man stuff!" or, "God I wish I was a girl." Any dysphoria or euphoria I feel is pretty mild and pronouns don't have much of an affect on me.

I don't think I'm agender, but I don't really feel gender most days. Sometimes I can notice that my thoughts are more masc or fem, but I usually find out when I put on girl clothes and feel either cute or uncomfortable. I only figured out I'm some kind of nonbinary just a couple months ago so I'm still getting familiar with myself, though.

Is this a more typical genderfluid experience than I think? Am I just tired?

(26AMAB) Been with hair therapy (Minoxidil+Dutasteride) for 7+ years, and now facing hair transplant next week. My receading headline causes me a lot disphoria (and dysmorphis before coming out as GF) when I haven't come out as genderfluid to neither my doctor or dermatologist. I am considering to take HRT (Testosterone blockers and maybe microdosed estrogen) to look more fem (less body hair/beard, while keeping post-hair graft headline (lower DHT levels, what causes male balding). Any amab around here that had similar experiences? I'd like to listen to some advices with this process.

I been trying voice training, using some videos recomended by the people here and i really want a voice that helps me feel less awkward on my woman days but there's two problems, first my own inability in keep a daily training routine and the second is that i feel awkward trying, even alone at home where no one is hearing i feel like a dumbass, a weirdo, i just hope i can get over those feelings

i feel like lately more and more i just dont know what i am or what i want to be, i dont know if i am a man, i dont know if i am a woman, and i dont know if i am non binary, i just dont know what i am, does this make sense at all/do people relate to this?

Im on the skinnier side (under bust is 26”) so I can’t find a breast plate that doesn’t look baggy on me but i still don’t like the edges on silicone breast forms. How have yall made breast forms look more seamless/realistic even on low cut tops/topless

Genuinely, for what other reason do I have all that stuff in my bio?

My pronouns have never been used without me having to mention it multiple times, or they suddenly forget them

Does anyone else have this problem?

Helloo, 18M here.

I'd like to ask some questions, really I don't know what I am right now, so I thought I'd ask people with similar experiences.

Context:

I live in a VERY conservative country, and a conservative part of it at that; Growing up, my parents are kind and love me, but obviously pushed masculine stuff always, and don't get me wrong, I loved it. I love being a guy, I love working out, I play basketball, I enjoy feeling like a guy. But I've always been morbidly curious about stuff like what it'd be like to be a girl. For years, it was a question I'd just think about.

My uncles and whatnot always pushed me to be manly, but I never really was. I'm soft-spoken, fairly short (5'6"), I don't really argue for myself, so everyone thought I was weak, told me I was girly, weak and whatnot growing up. That was kind of a negative association for me, so I tried to bury that part. Hence why it only came up so recently and hit like a truck

Truth is though, I've noticed, especially in the past year that I've become far more open to that side of me, I love looking at dresses, I'd love to experience what it's like to be a woman. Being perceived and passing as one, but at the same time, I love being a guy. I don't want to give up my life, but I can't help but want to experience the other side. I've been having recurrent dreams of being a girl in fantasy scenarios, and I love them. They feel natural.

All that to say, If there was a button that let me switch genders every day, whenever I wanted with appropriate memory changes, like I'd always been like that, I wouldn't stop changing forever. Some days I feel really feminine, some days I feel masculine. I want to remain masculine, but sometimes I'd love to try on a magnificent dress, I have pretty long hair already, so that's something.

If I ever get outta here, I really want to cross-dress for this reason, just be able to change day to day from a guy to a girl, and hopefully pass, be natural. I could be more free to express that feminine side of myself I've repressed for so long. The closest I've gotten is online, the games I play are mostly social, so I for the first time a few weeks ago, decided to switch to female stuff, and I felt so free, I felt like I didn't need to be more masculine than I am. It was awesome. and I haven't gone back.

I've told ONE friend Irl about this, otherwise no one knows. He was really like genuinely really supportive.

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With that out of the way, what do you make of this if you've been in a similar spot? I really don't know anymore, I've been struggling with this for so long, sometimes I feel disgusting for being like this, I hate I was born in a place where I can't explore it either. Is this what it is to be gender-fluid? I don't really like labels, but I don't know what to say.

i’ve just been pondering on my gender since like 2024 right? at first i wondered why i liked dressing up as a girl a helluva lot more than other people, why i got so excited when my hg put makeup on me once, at first i thought i wanted to be a girl completely but i was like “nah, it’s not i’m uncomfortable in my own skin. i like being a dude” but after coming to the conclusion i realized i still liked fem shit, so i was kinda at an impass for a while, now i’ve kinda been having more of the thoughts of wanting to be both and alternating between the two whenever i want. so is this like being genderfluid? i just want some advice on what these feelings could possibly mean, this is just all very new to me.

Greeting friends.

For a few years now, I often introduce myself as “Any” in LGBT+ hangouts. Mostly I couldn’t nail down if I wanted to be seen as a different gender as someone who’s AFAB or if the patriarchy has hit my brain so hard that I dislike the stereotypical perception of femininity being seen as weaker.

Thing is, I probably think about it too much to just questioning what it means to be “a woman in society”, especially when I was excited when people couldn’t distinguish my gender in my writing or chat groups.

I find myself wanting to explore a more androgynous vibe, as I am not quite ready to step into more masculine. Right now, I’m mainly looking for good creators or articles on fashion regarding more androgynous looks. I tend to dress pretty business casual, so ideally someone with a focus on street fashion or office like.

And as I said to my lovely friend, bless their soul, hoodies are off the table for me. I cook alive even in the winter.

Hello!

I just very recently figured out that I am genderfluid. I am thinking about getting a binder to see how that feels on my less feminine days since my main source of dysphoria is my chest. Do you guys have any recommendations of fairly inexpensive binders? I’ll look into a higher quality one later if I feel that this helps me. Thanks!

Hi, I'm 17 and AMAB and I only found out about my gender around 1 1/2 years ago. I've been suffering with a nagging depression for around 3+ years now and I'm at the point where I am questioning whether I should keep living on this rock. I've been living with so much fear that my gender will be revealed to all the wrong people and that stresses me out a lot. I'm also feeling like I have no purpose in life and I'm currently out of a job and struggling at school. I just feel like crap and that's where the SH kicks in. Most nights are me at first just being down but out of nowhere I feel heightened and feel like there is no escape, this then turns to SH and either crying myself to sleep or considering ending it all. I've been keeping it a secret for a long time till around 3 months ago when one of my friends was worried for my safety after they noticed some scars on my arm as they thought that it was some parent abuse. Now after talking to all of the people that I have come out to the main message was to go tell a professional about this. And I'm still kinda thinking about this because yes, I do need to talk to someone about this, but I'm just worried that I'm going to let something slip. See in my school and most other schools in Australia and around the world professionals have to keep a level of confidentiality unless among other things, a risk of harm exists, and well I have been harming myself so that is that being brought up on, and this will be relayed to my parents. And well my parents are the number one people knowing about my genderfluidity and even if the professional doesn't tell, then they will pressure me to answer. And my parents are very transphobic and have talked about how they are "harming the youth" or whatever else they say. So that is why I'm stressed about telling someone about this. So now all of this pressure and general laziness leads me to a lack of worthiness within myself and feeling like a stain on everyone I have met. This might not be a suicidal mindset but if not, it is still something pulling me down. I don't what to do and I don't expect people to read this, realistically it will be pulled from the site which might be a good thing, but I'm going through some things that might be true to some. I end with this; can you be your true self if you're dead?

PS. This was written in the middle of the night here in Australia so apologies if the wording is bad. Also have a wonderful day!

so i recently i’ve been having a lot of what i think is dysphoria and i don’t quite know what to do about it. i’m 20, afab, i dress pretty feminine, and i have long hair. everybody i meet irl assumes i’m a girl and online i have to set my pronouns to he/they instead of he/they/she because people will only call me she. it’s been bugging me for a long time now but the problem is that i love dressing the way i dress so much that i don’t wanna give it up. i like wearing masc/androgynous clothes for casual stuff but if im going out and i wanna feel myself, dressing fem feels right. i just wish that people would see me as a boy in women’s clothing. i’m very open to cutting my hair, it’s the longest it’s been since i was a kid and i like the look but i hate the sensory. i just don’t know what i should do to make people see me as a boy

In short, I go through phases where I experience really severe dysphoria and was just 🤏🏻 a little bit away from starting HRT However, I also have periods when I have no problem with my gender, which can sometimes last for several months.

But I’ve noticed that I’ve developed coping strategies to deal with the dysphoria or at least, I think they’re coping strategies. I’m embarrassed to write this, but I act out my fantasies of living as the other gender sexually, and I also like to use cannabis from time to time. When I’m high on cannabis, I’ve noticed that the thought of starting my transition feels really weird and wrong.

But now I’ve been on vacation for weeks and haven’t had access to either of those options, and suddenly my desire to take hormones and have a female body has returned with greater intensity.

But even in those moments when I'd like to start taking hormones, my fears really hold me back.
For one thing, I have severe social anxiety and could never imagine coming out. For me, it’s a nightmare to think about applying for jobs or meeting new people when I don’t pass and that’s never 100% guaranteed.
The current political climate doesn’t make things any better.

I just have no idea how to deal with all this back-and-forth with the dysphoria getting worse and then suddenly disappearing.

Sorry for the rambling, but I just had to get that off my chest.

Bats keep entering my house and I'm honestly a little scared.

edit: It's four going on five now. usually we let them out but they're really aggressive and nobody in my house wants to risk rabies

When I’m presenting as a man i get treated so much better than when i present as a woman. ESPECIALLY when people think i’m a cis man. It’s honestly depressing. As a woman, men are either shitty or perverts and a good amount of women are mean (because i’m a goth mexican living in utah lmao.) So i get bullied by some women occasionally or just ignored. Yet when i present as a guy? Especially as a cis one? Men treat me better and are more open and actually see me for my personality. Women are so much nicer and hit on me more as a man than as a woman. I’ve made more female friends when i present male, it’s odd. I don’t even change my personality or anything when i switch.
But yeah, just wanted to rant because it’s honestly sad.

Hello, I am needing a bit of help trying to figure out what I want. I am a FAB and I’m unsure if I want to go on HRT but would like to appear more androgynous. I have had a lot of struggles in the past with body dysmorphia and trying to be comfortable in my own skin. I am now at the point where I am comfortable in the body. I am enjoy wearing what I want to wear. But I would like to present more masculine. I bought a binder and it ended up squishing everything causing a lot more gender dysphoria than anything. In the past, I have thought about going on HRT to give more masculine features but I worry going on HRT will make me lose the feminine part of myself that I enjoy. I have tried working out some, but besides more muscle in the arms and back I’m not sure how to make my face more masculine or more androgynous. Is there anyway that I can be both essentially? I would love to be able to just switch bodies depending on the day and I understand that’s not realistic. Are there ways that have worked for you not going on HRT but still giving off a very masculine or androgynous vibe?

If that makes sense? I've come to find in my gender journey that I honestly identify with three terms, Trans or "Transfem", Nonbinary and Genderfluid.

Trying to figure out who I am is incredibly confusing. My AGAB is male, but... I wanna be a girl. I suffer lately from awful gender dysphoria and I try to present femininely as possible, where possible. So, I feel, for me, my "expression" is fluid. If I could, I'd always appear femininely.

I feel like people who come out as Trans and in general, gender-diverse, have to be put into a little box of what people think you are. I recently even changed my name socially. But yeah, I feel like I'm clearly having a "Trans-like" identity experience, even if I experience it fluidly.