r/Fibromyalgia • u/PotatoIsWatching • 5h ago
Discussion How fast we can go from ok to hell
It's bizarre how quickly we can go from feeling good to hell.
Yesterday I was down bad. My fatigue had me having trouble standing. My weakness made me skip washing my face and doing my nightly routines. I was in bed all day. I had the world crushing my shoulders and squeezing me tight. I was so depressed and felt as if life wasn't worth it. I imagined how my family would take it if I took my own life. How could I explain to them that it was the best thing for me. Don't worry I don't want to die, I'm also in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist. But in these flares nothing else matters, I can't find anything but misery. I feel as if I'll never get better, and I fall on my bed in dread and despair. It's cruel and unfair.
Then I wake up in the morning feeling totally okay. The fatigue is there but not overtaking. The pain is there but not bothersome. I can move without feeling a thousand pounds on my shoulders. The weakness is gone and I can do things. I'm washing my blankets, cleaning my bathroom, playing video games with my mom. Changing my Chickens water. I am okay and I feel as if I have a chance at a normal life. Not perfect, still ill, but I am doing and that's all that matters.
These two things are so opposite of one another it's almost unbelievable. How I can be tortured so terribly one day and then the next it's like it never even happened. Fibromyalgia is cruel and unusual. I am glad I have this communities who understands exactly what I'm talking about.
Thank you for reading.