I (23 F) recently went on a 6-day school project trip to Italy from July 29 to August 4 with two girls I knew, one Korean (21 F) and one Italian (26 F). I was excited about Italy and actually had some really nice memories there, but the experience with these two girls was so exhausting that even weeks later, I still feel intense anger whenever I think about it.

First destination was Rome. The biggest problem was sleep. I have gastritis, and when I don’t sleep properly, I feel physically terrible. I explained this to them, but because we were sharing a hotel room, I had no choice but to wake up whenever they did. They would stay up talking, scrolling Instagram/TikTok, etc. until around 3 AM and then wake up around 6 AM because they wanted to go sightseeing early. When I complained, the Korean girl told me, “If you’re that sensitive, you should have booked your own hotel room.” I couldn’t afford to get another hotel, and I wasn’t asking them to change their whole schedule. I just wanted them to understand that I needed some sleep too. After that, there was constant tension between us, and I felt like she was very self-centered and would call me “sensitive” or “problematic” whenever I expressed that something was bothering me.

Then we took a bus to Florence, and once we arrived, she couldn’t find her suitcase in the baggage area. Apparently, someone had taken it. At the train station, she saw a random girl’s suitcase that looked similar to hers. She hit the girl first and then made her open the suitcase. The poor girl opened it, and there was nothing belonging to my friend inside. The poor girl then hit her back, and the situation became extremely violent. She ended up bleeding badly. Afterward, my friend was obviously devastated because her suitcase was actually gone, and I had to pay extra for a taxi to the hotel. At the hotel, she told me she felt terrible and asked me to stay with her because she couldn’t sleep. I was exhausted and my stomach was hurting, so I told her I needed to sleep. Despite everything, the next morning I still helped her. I gave her my shampoo and facial cleanser and even offered her some of my clothes because almost all of her things were gone. Even after all of that, there were constant misunderstandings between us and the tension never really went away.

When we arrived in Venice, I eventually told her I didn’t want to spend the day together because we’d had so much tension and I simply didn’t enjoy traveling with her anymore. The Italian girl then asked me to go with her, so I agreed. I thought it would be nice to spend some time with someone else. But when the Korean girl saw us together, she became upset and started saying things like,“What’s this? You two are together now and I’m alone?” She then started calling me problematic and saying I don’t get along with anyone, even bringing up an old conflict I had with someone else. At that point, I just felt completely done.

The final night was probably what made everything worse. They both knew I had a 9 AM flight the next morning, but they stayed awake talking random things until around 3 AM with the lights on while I was trying to sleep. I was completely exhausted and felt like they simply didn’t care.

The trip has been over for weeks, but I still get angry when I remember it. I don’t want to see them, and I honestly don’t feel like forgiving them. The problem is that this was a school project, so in about two weeks we have to work together again and give our final presentation. I’m still occasionally messaging the Italian girl, but I feel tension and annoyance even when talking to her. Before the trip, I actually liked her and appreciated her, but after this experience, my opinion of her completely changed.

I don’t want to keep carrying this anger around, especially because I actually loved seeing Italy and don’t want these people to become the main memory I have of the trip. So I’m wondering: how do you stop replaying an experience like this in your head? How do you let go of the anger without having to forgive the people involved? And what can I actually learn from an experience like this?

TL;DR: I went on a 6-day school trip to Italy with two girls, and the experience became extremely stressful because of constant sleep deprivation, conflicts, misunderstandings. One girl even got into a physical altercation after losing her suitcase. I tried to help her afterward despite our problems, but the tension continued, and by the end I no longer wanted to travel with either of them. Now I still feel angry weeks later, but I have to work with them again on our school project. How do I stop replaying the experience, let go of the anger without forgiving or reconnecting with them, and figure out what I should learn from the whole situation?

I'm an adult learner at a community college, and I recently enrolled in a stage acting class. The professor seems nice, friendly, and really tries her best to teach us. There are 9 students total in the class.

One of my classmates is a guy I took another acting class with during the summer. Back then, he was weird and stared at me a lot, but nothing crazy happened and I just ignored him. I wasn't expecting to see him again this semester. Now, he's not only staring, but also following me around a lot during movement exercises. There are other men in the class, but you can clearly feel the difference. Nobody else stares or keeps trying to get close to me. He's being really creepy, and it's a constant thing.

Another thing happened today. I was assigned to a group project with 3 others to create an improv scene. But the moment the teacher walked away to let us work, this guy started talking non-stop and joking around, and the other two girls were just giggling with him. It was so weird. I let them joke for a bit, but then I tried to bring the topic back to our scene since that's what we were assigned to do. All three of them completely ignored me and kept joking. Shocked by what was happening, I ended up pulling out my phone. Then this guy asked for the girls' names and my name. I couldn't help but confront him, as I felt all three of them were deliberately ignoring or excluding me. He apologized, and said he's just a comedic person who likes to joke around, and that he didn't mean to ignore me. I accepted his apology and asked again if we could work on the scene. But right after, all three of them went straight back to joking and giggling. It felt so stupid. In the end, we did perform the scene, but it was overly simplified and I felt so frustrated. After coming home and thinking about it, I realized maybe those three just had no interest in working on the scene and didn't really care about the class. It really surprised me. Why would people spend time and money on a class if they don't care? Now, I really hope I don't get assigned to projects with any of them again.

So out of the other 8 students in class, there are now 4 that I don't want to work with or even interact with. This makes me really want to drop the class. But on the other hand, I really like the teacher, I want to learn, and I don't want to waste my semester. However, this class is very group project heavy, and I know there's a high chance I'll be paired with them again.

I'm really torn and would love to get some advice on what to do. Thank you!

I 19F got sick around the end of May. I had just started working as a CNA at this nursing home. I was in training when I was changing a lady with another CNA. She told me she would be back in a minute so Im waiting until I find out she took her lunch break. So the resident is getting upset because she's been on the toilet for 10-15 minutes. This lady cannot stand and is a 2 person assist. So I look for someone else to help and I get told by someone that they dont get paid to do my job. I try asking several more people but everyone says they cant help. So i lift this lady myself and she throws up on me.

After like an hour, I start feeling really, really sick to my stomach so I leave early. I also vomited 4 times and kept repeatedly chocking on my own vomit. Less than an hour later I'm in the ER. They tell me it's probably a virus and give me nausea medicine. My BP is 70/46 I'm passing out every 2 minutes and I get discharged.

I go back to the ER a day later because Im still vomiting and cant keep nothing down. They discharge me and tell me i need to drink more fluids.

I have had back to back dr appointments. Ive been tested for h pylori and it came back negative. My Dr said it's just stress or I might have an ED. I have stomach pain after i eat anything and its getting more and more severe.

I vomit after every meal. I also started developing allergic reactions where my tounge ans cheeks swell and develop a rash. My throat will sometimes get numb and tingly. I went on a diet that was :

No dairy

No gluten

No corn

No sugar

No raw vegetables

No nightshade vegetables

No soy

No seed oils

No spicy foods

No citrus

No legumes

No nuts

I will say my stomach felt better but I was eating so little and I'm sure I was missing out a lot of vitamins so I felt like shit anyways and started crying. I have cronic nerve pain in my teeth so I have a very high pain tolerance but just couldn't take it.

I still have reflux, severe stomach pain, and vomiting. I throw up after any kind of red meat and shrimp. I cant eat chicken. Salmon I can eat with no problems and sometimes eggs but they make me bloated.

I had these issues when I was little. Im so sad because my health was doing so good before I got sick. My parents try sayings it's a consequence from God or result from mental illness. I know it isnt true but I feel insulted.

I litterly was just crying from the pain. Ive been to 3 didfrent drs not including the er docs. I need help I need recommendations. No one thinks it's this serious but it is. Please any help/comments will be appreciated.

I am a small young girl. Yesterday I was outside my apartment in my complex training my German Shepherd puppy, and this tall skinny guy, probably in his forties walked past me, pretended like he was going to walk down the sidewalk, then turned back in my direction and stood a little ways away from where I was at, watching people. He then proceeded to walk away, though returned several seconds later, waited until people passed, then got even closer to me then hung out there. He repeated this one more time, getting closer to me than before, then went up a random set of stairs as if to look casual, though headed back down them, so i moved some buildings down. He then managed to walk absolutely right past me anyway. I know I was being harassed. I do have a couple of little weapons on me, but still.

I mean unsafe as in "left on the counter all night and not put in the fridge" kind of unsafe. They claim that they have done it all their lives and nothing has ever happened, which a) doesn't really have to be true lol b) is survivor bias.

Unfortunately, when I even dare ask if the ingredient used was the expired one we still have, or when was the food put into the fridge ... Even when I offer to stay up and wait until the food (which they prepare in the EVENING) gets cold and then put it in the fridge, they yell at me - that I'll starve when I'm older, that I am stupid, etc. They refuse when I offer to help so it gets done earlier and then cold before we go to bed.

I am not yet an adult, but I can make my own food. I make it as often as I can, but unfortunately I can't make myself lunch (according to them), which coincidentally is usually the food that gets left on the counter overnight. And when I say I will make my own food anyway, then they say I should pay for it - which it dumb, I don't have any source of income, plus I would use the food we have that somebody else would have used anyway, so in my opinion it's a win-win situation.

It it a matter of control? Do they refuse to change their routine...because of what? I have health anxiety and mild emetophobia, which makes the situation way emotionally harder. Every try to help on my account has failed. What do I do?

And yes, I forgot to mention, they refuse to put food into the fridge unless it's FULLY room temperature. How can you expect a large pot of soup to cool down anytime soon? It's ridiculous, and I got completely chewed out the last time I dared to put something slightly warm into the fridge. Help???

Hi, I want to ask you for advice on what to do with my dad. In short, I have a younger sister. We had a terrible childhood, my dad himself comes from a bad family situation (grandma had 6 children, she was the only one raising them, he was the last child, she didn't pay attention to him because she had 3 jobs, he was raised by older siblings, but she wasn't a harpy) and ever since I can remember, we've felt unwanted. As children, he beat us, punished us by ignoring us (for example, my sister dropped her camera on vacation, she was about 6 years old and he didn't talk to her for 2 months, yes, he ignored us as small children!), I remember a trip when I was also about 6-7 years old, I cried in the back of the car because my parents didn't want to buy me a stuffed animal and he crashed into another car, he beat me at home, said it was my fault and probably didn't talk to me for several months. To this day, I can still remember how I went to him that night to say good night, dad, and he didn't say anything. Besides, we've been hearing our whole lives that we were stupid. Did you fall? Are you stupid? Are you excited? Are you stupid. We were stupid at everything. He even addressed us like that in front of people. Once at my aunt's wedding, he told us in front of people that he would like to hit us over the head with a hammer. We were the only ones in school, both graduated from high school with honors, nice women, good jobs and anyway - I have a bad job because I'm an idiot. He always criticizes us. He never told us he loves you. I'm proud of you. You're just an idiot, you annoy me, you're worthless and you cost me a lot of money. I made a driver - reaction and what? Should I fuck myself? My sister got a dream job where she'll work with children - reaction? Are you going to do that with gypsies? Ugh. I'm pointing out that he wanted children.

He's been treating us like this all our lives. He puts us down, criticizes us for everything, all our hobbies and interests are terrible, inferior, we're ugly, fat or skinny, when my boyfriend broke up with me and I came home crying he said to me - so what? Has he finally kicked you out of the house?

He also neglected our health care - we always had to be at school under all circumstances because he didn't want to deal with any inconvenience. 40 fever? Are you going to school. I went to the hospital in a delirium after school and stayed there for 2 weeks on antibiotics. And at the hospital he told me that I needed it because I was dressing badly. I still have one kidney from that bad thing. And I can't hear well in one ear, I also had an infection and they didn't take me to the doctor. My sister also has several such things.

According to him, we chose a bad high school, a bad college (for morons), but he was never there to help us choose, to guide us. Imagine that you live with a landlord, you have somewhere to eat, somewhere to sleep, what to wear, but that person will only ask you questions your whole life. Where was our mother? Severe alcohol addiction because of him, she died 7 years ago. That's a different story, also very ugly. She usually had a liter of hard liquor in her during the day, so don't expect any maternal love and care. Most days she was either asleep or not at home, when she had a nervous breakdown she would break up half the apartment or we would drag her home from the hospital exhausted. She would usually have a blood alcohol level of 4 at lunch. My sister and I both ended up in the ER. But when she wasn't drinking, she was a good person. At least you could talk to her. And sometimes she told us that she loved us.

For a while after my mother's death, he experienced a bit of mortality and was a bit normal, at that time we both tried to establish a relationship. But gradually it slipped back into the old rut, we were idiots again that he despises. He currently lives with his sister because he promised her the apartment they live in. He gave me money for the apartment so I moved out. And that keeps her trapped. And he oppresses her every day.

Gradually it got to the point that she didn't wish us happy holidays, she wasn't interested in my son (the only grandchild), simply if I or she didn't take a step, there's no relationship. And if I don't come to see him, she punishes me even more. Didn't you come? I'm your father, so I know it's your birthday. Or your son.

Everyone tells me that I should talk to him. And that he's my father, so I should apologize. But lately I've had an extreme urge to erase him from my life for all those years of wrongdoing. Sometimes I wish he or I would die, so that I could break through that feeling. It's terrible, but it's true. Has anyone experienced something similar? Cut off a parent completely? Thank you to everyone who read this far..

When you lose hope after you’ve been fired or laid off twice at the same company (got a request from the high school I used to tutor in for my immediate removal because I didn’t have rapport with the students, and then got let go by the company itself after serving as a tutor at an elementary school where I had rapport with my students), and there is either no response from potential employers or rejection, and despair and hope comes in waves and you’re doubting whether the education field really is for you

Please tell me if I'm overreacting. I've recently become aware that the way my mother has treated me is not normal. I believe she is potentially gaslighting me and has been manipulative. Have any of you had experience with this?

Sorry for the long post

I'm a 19 year old male and am an only child. During my childhood my mother would do the following

Blow up out of nowhere over the most trivial or littlest matters, many times i begged her to give me some emotional support when i was visibly upset but she just remained cold and cruel, drink quite heavily which was sometimes responsible but she can definitely be mean sober as well, I had expressed concern about her drinking but she just flipped, it actually got physical a few times as well and I did have a scar once, the next day she'd always act as if nothing happened, whenever I tried to get clarity on why she got like that she'd brush it under the carpet or accuse me of starting trouble, she'd turn cold at the drop of a hat, during arguments she'd say things like I was ungrateful, didn't care about her and that I was a horrible person or that i was abusive or whatever just like my father, she would stomp, slam doors, shout, scream, swear and break ornaments etc, when she gets in her crazy states it's just impossible to reason with her or get her to see it from any other perspective, she can go from saying i was the most nicest and amazing person to saying I was the most horrible and evil person, she often burdened me with all of her problems, she said before that she knows how to play the game which I found very disturbing

She often paints herself as the heroic single mum. She has been fairly good lately but sometimes I feel I was robbed of a proper childhood and have often wondered what I had done to deserve it.

I remember one time a few years ago I was about 12 she during a sleepover at theirs she turned my grandparents against me and my grandfather started shouting and saying he was very disappointed in me and the rest of it is a blur. To be honest to this day i can't figure out what I (only a young child) was supposed to have done that was so bloody awful. That has haunted me for years. I used to think maybe I was a bad person but I've started to see her in a different light. She always talks about hating drama yet it seems to follow her and often says that she's been so hard done by.

On the flip side she can be the most nicest person as well and we have had great times together and she can be very helpful towards me, her family and in public which makes it all the more confusing. A couple of days ago in fact I ran into an old friend of hers who said to say hi for her and she said my mother is a wonderful person and I'm very lucky. It actually made me feel sick. For about half my childhood it's just been me living with her since her divorce in which she had to sell her house and now rents which she has blamed for the way she is before. I can't help feeling bad for her but she was still quite like this beforehand as well and I don't think that's an excuse still is it? I do feel like she has manipulated me a bit into been stuck with her.

Something else that I've found disturbing is that she's very narrow minded and has a serious lack of empathy. For example when a couple of local celebrities committed suicide she shouted and carried on, called them pathetic cowards and weak etc. It was actually quite disturbing how she was carrying on and her serious lack of empathy.

I'm starting to think that maybe she bent the truth about Dad a bit during their split as i was a child and didn't know much better. My mother often calls him a narcissist and talked about all of the marital and grown up problems they had etc which to be honest I don't appreciate been burdened with. Granted he's not a saint either but has been good to me (well I'd say) most of the time.

One time last year when my Dad let me down by not been able to see me one weekend and canceling at the last minute (which he has done quite a few times before).

During that said weekend my mother had another one of her outbursts. I was the bathroom which was an en suite and she knocked on the door asking to take a few photos for something. All I asked was if she could just give me a few minutes to finish up but she started the shouting and carrying and accused me of been selfish and trying to manipulate her. I only asked just to give me a few minutes. When I explained to her how upset I was about that weekend she said she feels really bad for me and hates how he let me down. What just absolutely astounds is how can she feel that yet emotionally and mentally abuse me and kick me while I'm down. I just can't comprehend that.

A few days after that weekend one of my teachers checked in and said he heard I got into a bit of trouble at home ("if he meant been mentally abused by my mother while I was already upset by been let down by my father as trouble" I thought). I'm not even sure who exactly said what to him and that's something that I've also wondered. I just fobbed him off saying I was upset about leaving school (which was true as well).

I really struggle with confiding in people. I do regret not telling him the truth now. He was sympathetic and said he was very proud of me etc. Another teacher once said that he thought of me and my mother as like the dream team or something along those lines. It actually baffled me a bit. I was thinking if only they knew half the things I've been through.

I have autism and went to a special support school for the last few years which were some of the best years (The teachers especially were brilliant and I had many great times such as school camps, school balls and excursions etc).

I must admit I do feel quite down sometimes that I have a strained relationship with my father (He's got money issues and also smokes pot) and my mother often used me as an emotional punch bag. Makes me think that there must be something really wrong with me and that I'm unlovable.

On the bright side though my Dad and I have been in contact lately and we spent the weekend together a while back and went for a pub meal

Her latest meltdown was this January while we were on holiday and at the beach. I wanted to be shirtless like pretty much everyone else and she started making passive aggressive and snide remarks saying things like "have fun burning yourself" and "why can't you make smart decisions?"

I was already sun safe with a hat and everything and I wasn't going to be too long and tried explaining that to her. I'll admit I snapped and told her that I'm an adult now and she could no longer control me and couldn't make me feel guilty. I wish I hadn't now but it felt like something snapped inside me and I expressed things I had felt for ages. She then called her mother to tell her that I was been impossible and making her life a misery (this is something she has done a couple of times before). I wish I had just walked away and not played into her hands.

Something disturbing she has said ages ago is when I'm an adult she could have me done for assault if she wanted. She also said she wanted to do a will and try to control my assets where my Dad can't touch anything and said she feared he would try to steal all of my money. I can't believe she would say things like that so unshameably and can't help feeling like she was trying to manipulate me.

My mother loves to use my autism to her advantage. I graduated last year but now I do a course at the main campus so I still see them all from time to time. I do feel quite sad and lost now those years are over. I would love to confide in someone about my struggles but don't know where to start. I've thought about confiding in that first teacher I mentioned who's great and we're fairly close but my teachers think my mother's an absolute saint so how can i ensure he believes me, she seems to feel that she always acts in my best interests and does seem to genuinely care for me and love me, she doesn't seem to remember any of it or feel her behavior was justified and genuinely doesn't seem to believe she ever did me any harm and she thinks she did her best. She's always quick to call others toxic and narcissists etc. She unshameably tells me everything going on in her life and her anxiety which makes me anxious. Why does it upset me so badly even when it has little or nothing to do with me?

I struggle with daily flashbacks and I often feel depressed by the way I've been treated, also feel let down and wish my parents had been better to me. I can't get exact clarity on it but they both went through some stuff before I was born and I think that's contributed to the way they are.

As I've said before I do wonder if she might've been different if she had not gone through her divorce and maybe if things might've gone differently for her. What do you guys think?

Also I can't help feeling empathy towards her as she always looked after me, fed me, organized things for me and pretty much always brought me everything I wanted.

I wish I had a proper childhood of playing with friends, going to different places and been adventurous and carefree etc. I've never really had a social circle and hardly much friends. I've always been quite different I feel to most of the children my age. I feel quite alone sometimes as I've always struggled with making friends. I do feel like I've been isolated with her a lot of the time. I would really love to start a proper life and follow my dreams and make a few friends but don't know where to start.

My mother does help me get on my feet and encourage met but I think she just loves to lord it over me. Whenever I've tried standing up for myself she puts on the guilt trip and carries on about all of her sacrifices and everything she's done for me yada yada yada. I think what emotionally abusing me, leaving me crying myself to sleep some nights, causing me to have no confidence and PTSD etc? Could she have some bipolar or personality condition or something and toxic traits I've wondered?

I can't help really resenting her (also my father) sometimes for all of the mental anguish she has put me through as a child and I think it has messed up my development. I wonder what might've been different had I had proper parents or they were proper ones. Hobbies such as music and classic TV shows have been a great escape. Now that I'm an adult and have left school I'm worried about what the future has in store. I'm very nervous about starting an adult life, getting a job and making friends etc because my mum is pretty much most I've ever known. Part of me would love to get away from her but yet I feel scared to as well as she's pretty much most I've ever known.

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I had an HR’s number from a company I applied to a while ago. Later, when I was looking for a job, I contacted him and asked about opportunities. Since then, we’ve talked quite a lot.

He has always behaved respectfully with me. He calls me “sister” and I call him “brother.” He has never said anything inappropriate or made me uncomfortable. He has also guided me about jobs and said he would help me with referrals.

We live in different cities. He knows that I’m not very social, I get anxious around people, and I’ve never lived alone before.

Recently, he has been encouraging me to visit his city for a few days, go out, explore the city and experience the outside world because he thinks it would help me become more confident and independent.

I actually want to go, but at the same time, I don't feel comfortable staying with him. He said I could stay with one of his female friends instead.

Even though he has always treated me like a genuine brother, I still don't feel comfortable trusting someone 100%.

What would you do in this situation?

Would you go and meet him while keeping your own accommodation and boundaries, or would you avoid going altogether?

Am I being unnecessarily suspicious, or is it normal to have these boundaries even when someone has always behaved respectfully?

so, my younger cousin is currently going to her last year of middle school, and i want to explain a few things about her school before getting into the situation.

1. her school is religious, so boys and girls aren’t allowed to talk to each other.
2. it’s a private school.
3. the school is basically one big room, and she’s stuck in a tiny classroom for the entire day. she isn’t really allowed to leave or move around outside of it.
4. there are only about 4-5 girls in her class who she can actually talk to.
5. the school is very unprofessional, no organized classes, no organized breaks, short lunch time, no p.e, etc.

now, onto the problem. she currently has two friends that she sits with, so i guess you could call them a trio. the problem is that these two constantly leave her out, make fun of her, gang up on her, and even kick her chair. she usually just puts up with it because they’re her friends and she doesn’t want to confront them about it. she’s tried confronting them before, but they just denied doing anything.

she also doesn’t really enjoy talking to them because they don’t have many shared interests. for example, they’re really into k-pop, k-dramas, and things like that, while she’s more into anime. she’s told me that she doesn’t find their jokes funny either, so she doesn’t feel like she can really bond with them.

i honestly feel bad for her, so i asked why she doesn’t try talking to the other two girls in her class. she said it’s basically the same situation with them too.

at this point, she’s just incredibly bored and has practically no one to talk to throughout the entire school day. a huge part of school is being able to socialize and make friends, so i genuinely don’t know what to tell her or how she’s supposed to deal with this situation.

i was also told that she struggles with loneliness. apparently, she’ll sometimes space out while resting her head on her desk and start slightly crying, but then she wipes her tears and pretends like she’s sleeping just to pass the time

i‘d appreciate anyone’s help, she’s the absolute sweetest so i really wanna do something for her.

so im an athlete and I recently started uni and the uni I go to is incredibly focused on academics (ie. 85% attendance mandatory, graded assignments 1 month and semester exams the other month for like 4ish months straight, etc.) My main issue is I have practice everyday except Monday's and my uni ends at 5pm. By the time I come home and finish any assignments it's already 7 and I come back from practice at around 9ish-10pm. My coach has this thing of "if u wanna make it to internationals, you have to practice for atleast 3-4 hours everyday consistently" which is probably true but I cannot really fulfill that and he keeps saying to me and my parents that he gave up on me and will not focus on me anymore because I am not putting in the "effort" (which I am to the best of my ability I have to go from 9-5 for classes and finish assignments by 7 then immediately leave for practice till 10pm) which is insane because the only reason I took this to long-term is because he kept telling my parents ill become the next great thing. Above that he wants me to work out and I know even I need to work out but I literally cannot find the time to do my actual work how can I fit in workout sessions in between + because of all this I am really stressed and when I am stressed I don't really eat a lot which is pretty dangerous if I have to work out alongside that

The thing is since Thursday I haven't gone for practice and it's Sunday now and I kept telling my parents I will go but I am honestly so tired. I think it also comes from being unable to have the same performance (aka it's going down) and I get so demotivated from that and I am honestly in just a huge slump. I am so overwhelmed from all directions and there is absolutely nobody to talk to and I just have to deal with this all alone and I don't know where I will go with this. Please give advice on how to overcome this and gain motivation

I won’t live much longer in the societal construct of the 9-5 hustle culture rubbish western world has created. And I mean that literally, I’ve just come out of inpatient for safety containment.

I’ve been thinking to just sell anything I have, take my money and go driving north to Queensland from Melbourne and see if I find anything along the way.

But that’s not really logical.

I can freelance for work easily, but where do you find alternative community? Where can you find community living that’s more living off the land?

I’m not looking for some weird cult type shit, just an environment where people say it like it is. Where technology is less prevalent (especially smartphones) and just somewhere that isn’t this stupid fucking hustle culture shit we’re made to believe is normal.

I know that sounds like a stupid question because "he's your mental health guy he is supposed to help you" but this will be the second time this moth that I've reached out to him rather than waiting for him to schedule an appointment.

I will post the message I'm about to send. If there's a better, less crazy sounding way of saying things, please help me rewrite this. I have no one to ask to help me do this. For context I have autism and I know that sometimes I come across as a weirdo through texts and I don't want to creep him out he's actually helpful and don't want to have to go through finding a new person because it takes a lot of time, energy and cycling through people until I can find someone who can actually understand what I'm saying.

This is what I might send:

Hi \[his name\], I know you won't get this until Tuesday, and that's fine. I'm just writing the message now so I don't back out of saying, but I had a relatively big "wobble" last night and did not handle myself well and I don't want to get in trouble for not telling you. I am not doing good. I'm actually doing quite bad. I'm not really sure if there's anything anyone can do to help, but if we could make an appointment for whenever you're free, that might be good? I don't know, but I think it's what I'm supposed to do? I don't know. Sorry. It's OK if you're not free anytime soon, I've been going to the \[mental health drop in\], and I'm not like kill myself bad I just want to try and do something about this before it gets that bad.

my mother won't come pick me up from the airport after spending nine days all by myself (and at peace, will be elaborated on) in a faraway land. citing her poor eyesight, even though she does drive at night. i'm not overreacting. i can say that now. i am always emotionally neglected. the one that has to hold my "family" together (though this duty has been transferred onto my mother and granny recently.) though it's just a social construct that exists due to bureaucracy anymore.

my father also did the same previously. i, from another faraway land, arrived to my household deathly ill from food poisoning and had already passed out once just because i wanted him to save money. he ran away immediately after we came. didn't even look at me once. and spent all the money i saved for him by sticking to the original plan. i tried to heal by myself and my mother i guess. now she does the same. i had always been obsessed with appearing a simple person to others. and i got praised for it. "someone that only needs food and bed to be happy." they were saying. when i was a child, i was a computer addict so it was indeed true. then adolescence came. to preserve this i had pushed all the things which came as a package with being a human away. just a being, a plant i was. i had learned both from my family and environment that those complex needs won't be fulfilled due to events. so i just never showed them after a point for there was no point.

i went to a summer event, workshop at these nine days. i showed all the messy, complex, weak, scattered parts of myself after a lot of hesitation and came up with something. i was applauded louder than other people in my workshop. people liked it. validated. given the permission to continue existing. more than that, i was shown they were things to be embraced.

my mother and by extension my household. always showed the opposite. always lied to. "you're exaggerating. you're making a big deal of things. it's good. you're so angry/tense." was what i could commonly hear. just focus on the plate in front of you. anything else is discouraged. there's the computer, solve it by yourself. my father had also said "we are taking care of it all, why aren't you happy/do you need more?" a few times in the past. i felt guilty. for having them.

my father. he's a ghost. someone i only go to for money. he feels comfortable squeezing himself to such a small role. i don't.

i don't ask anything else of my father. he doesn't understand. he only sees alcohol.

the summer event also gave me a temporary community. where i could be myself and speak a lot to others. i did thanks greatly to the proximity. i opened up to others. i was liked. i enjoyed others presence. i enjoyed it all greatly.

the dormitory i had stayed, gave me a weaker and a longer-lasting version of it (though i didn't interact with a lot of people in the dormitory this year so that's why) but that doesn't change the fact that i felt at times more at home than my household. in both, i didn't have to lock away myself to fit in.

but they are all temporary.

in the end, the faux house is where i return to. just a hotel. not a place i can feel a belonging towards. somewhere you go because it's an habitual action and so there is no thinking at all.

when i was a child i loved my family. they took care of me physically and both because i were a computer addict and because i wasn't a complex being i wasn't being hard on them. i were taken care of.

but i grew up.

i want to own my house. i saw the social housing places in the faraway land. i loved them so much. there was a feeling of community. they were places i was free to live. they were also full of third spaces which were actually used and lively. in my country they are all forgotten, even when they exist.

i want to live in them in the future. it may imply being broke but i can forego money if it means i've a place that can stretch way beyond a work of architecture, give further definition to myself.

I took 3 5mg THC gummies and then drank a bit, maybe 4oz of 15% alcohol. Im a bit worried as I am currently experiencing the weirdest effect, as I feel heat rolling through my body, its a comfortable warmth but when it reaches my mouth and throat it feels like my throat is swollen, very dry and it gets slightly harder to breathe, Im experiencing 6-10 seconds before another wave comes through so Im breathing fine Im still concerned if I should alert someone about this.

Reasons I haven't alerted yet: My household is Mormen and even tho I'm 21 Im not supposed to be doing weed or alcohol so I will get in trouble and I cant afford to move out.

Edit: Thank you everyone for reassuring me that everything would be alright, took some advice and watched some calming videos. I was definitely freaking out a bit so this really helped.

To add a bit of context Ive been doing 5mg and 10mg before but wasnt feeling much of anything with that dosage, so I took the 15mg that night. Not sure where I got the bright idea to add alcohol to it but I did.

Hello! So one of my passions is mycology. It has been a hobby for quite a while. I would like to go back to school to pursue this seriously, but I need some advice about what steps to take. I already have a bachelor’s degree in studio arts and a minor in art history, so although I have done general ed obviously my degree has nothing to do with science. My main question is, should I go to a local CC advisor to have them help? Has anyone else done something similar and have advice? I know what I want to do but I am unsure of the steps to get into a biology or botany undergraduate program necessary to continue towards a mycology masters and beyond.

So uh, i'm 25 and my voice is really immature. I sound like a 13 year old teen girl. I guess it was normal when i was a child but im 25 now, is my voice gonna mature eventually or am i stuck sounding like a young teen forever? Plus im non binary and my voice is REALLY not helping my case. Its very high pitched, a bit whiny and girly. If at least i sounded like an adult it would bother me less. Both my parents sound perfectly mature, so do my siblings. What's wrong with me??

I F26 don't know what to do in my life anymore. I don't know where to go. I am a city girl at heart but right now I am STUCK in my small hometown for another year at least. I'll make it work. I've been abroad and lived alone for 3 years in total but in different cities. I'm finishing my studies now.

I converted to Catholicism which deeply influenced my life (dating, friendships, goals and morals). I don't mean to complain because my faith is my favourite thing about me but I have a lot of problems because of it.

people make fun of me, even my best friend M26. he makes fun of me all the time about everything. my political stances, my faith, my music taste. I already pushed him away for months because of this, he confronted me and it looked like he changed, only to come back the same a few months later (now).

I have many friends but they're all in different parts of my country or the world so I do feel lonely and, as I mentioned, I am stuck in a small town and there are no people left. it's a very ignorant place: my ex friend told random people I want to wait til marriage and now people in this town now and make fun of me.

I am tired. I don't know how to spend this winter a part from studying (I don't physically go to uni).

I am on the verge of a breakdown, so I kindly ask you to abstain to answer if my faith is gonna be judged in some way. it's a very triggering thing for me because everytime I talk about it i get bullied.

my only question is: how won't I get depressed during the winter? how do I find possibly Christian people? how do I build a friend group where I'm not the one being constantly bullied like in my current one? I'm tired. I'm tired. I'm tired.

i went to a cosplay con today, and i had contacts in and false lashes. they were irritated throughout the day but i thought it was just the lashes bothering me, however when i took them out they continued to be irritated and now one of them hurts and it feels like there’s a foreign object in my eye, but i can’t see anything. i’ve tried wiping where my eye meets eyelid and it doesn’t work. there is a sensitive spot right under my top eyelid that hurts when pressed on. someone help im going to cry

MODS DON'T REMOVE THIS I'M NOT LOOKING FOR NAME SUGGESTIONS. I still didn't change my original name legally but I chose Rei and it felt like it fits a lot for 2 years, but now I struggle with which spelling to choose (I don't like how Rae looks and Ray feels too masculine) and also it's no longer my fav name I guess cuz I chose it literally within 10-15 minutes when I was on a rush (I'm almost 17 now and I was 14 when family was manipulating me into instantly changing my horrible original name cuz they were on an online chat with a lawyer but then did nothing and made fun of me for being "immature"). I still love hearing its punchy but sweet tone, but my confidence in it is fading day by day. I want a longer and even edgier name that can be shortened but I don't wanna change it for the 3rd time later and honestly I struggle with these:

☆ Absolutely everyone knows me by Rei now and I fought a lot with abusive family to get them to partially accept it and not get further harassment.

☆ I've also struggled with "you're rejecting your Arab heritage by being a sLaVe to foreign cultures" cuz I'm Syrian and living here.

☆ The names that I wanted to be called with as a little girl feel a bit feminine for me now as a tomboy teen (Lumina, Neva, and Violet loved them the most) and almost named myself Violet after my all time fav color and a fashion book character in 2020 but received stupid offensive jokes from a family member so I got back to my original name, I was 10 so yeah

☆ This might come off as weird but I promised myself if I'll ever adopt a girl in the future I'll call her Rina cuz it came as her name in 3 dreams that revealed how she'll look like and who she'll be so I don't wanna ruin it with naming myself Reine/Reina

☆ I've already made a cool moniker for my future professional stuff with Rei

☆ No offense but I don't like being associated with anime culture and people might assume I am cuz I'm White and not a native Japanese who got the name at birth

Sooo should I face shit again and fully take my time thinking of a name that represents my new self more? and if yes how can I bring up this topic? no legal stuff will ever happen before 2028 tho so I have plenty of months to think of a new name. Thoughts of renaming myself have been eating my brain for weeks.

Hi I’m a 21 year old senior in college about to graduate in spring with accounting degree. Have had good internships last 2 summers, but only have 2k to my name. I easily could have 10-15k saved, but i’ve had a horrible sports betting problem last 4 years where I’ve just dumped away money like an idiot, Gonna have 15-17k in loans to pay off too. I should get a good accounting job right out of graduation but may wait a little to take cpa cuz i have no money. I plan on living at home for at least 2 years to save and pay off loans. Am i screwed? Just so mad at myself for not being responsible last few years.

So i m 20M, been PERFECTLY HEALTHY ALL ALONG.

since last 2weeksc my right side of head starts heating up like slowly and gradually and in about 10minutes it gets unbearable and spreads to the entire head but more strong on the right side.

Now interestingly this only happens when i am using social media (doomscrolling).
Initially it started, afaik, with me playing PUBG game and i think i focused too much on it like playing it for 5 hours daily with deep concentration.

So its been a week since i deleted it yet the issue persists though the severity of the pain is reducing.

Other than that i don’t get it. Sometimes it occurs even if i am just using whatsapp for important messages.

Please tell me what is happening.

As of writing this post, my right side is stirring with heat.
It is not exactly pain but rather initially it is just hear and irritation that then boils up and becomes unbearable.

Hey guys!

I apologize if any of this comes across as overly dramatic or overthought, but I need reassurance and a bit of advice. I am a sophomore at an Ivy League school, majoring in history. This year, I have to officially declare a major, and declaring my history major entails finding a faculty advisor on my own and writing out my course plan with them on a form. This advisor typically becomes your thesis advisor if they allow you to enter the honors program, which I am considering.

Last semester (freshman spring), I did well in a course with a professor I really liked. We talked at length once during office hours, chatted whenever we ran into each other outside of class, and his class was one of the most stimulating academic experiences of my life. He made me view history in a new light and solidified my decision to major in it.

I would like to ask him to be my advisor; however, the idea of doing so is giving me anxiety. He is a leading scholar in his field and is a very sophisticated person. Part of my anxiety comes from being intimidated by him, despite him being very kind and personable. I am not taking any classes with him this semester (sophomore fall), so I would have to cold-email him. I ran into him recently this semester and chatted about wanting to major in history.

I need some advice:

1. Would it be smart to reach out to him mid-to-late September? I think that's late enough to not seem too soon, but still early enough for him to remember my performance in class.
2. How do I email him about setting up an appointment to discuss this? How do I ask him if he would like to be my advisor? How do I sound confident yet natural?
3. How do I deal with the anxiety of discussing my academic future with someone I look up to? I am a naturally insecure person.
4. If he were to become my thesis advisor, how do I get over the fear of working closely with a professor?

Thank you for reading this, guys! All advice is welcome :)