r/socialanxiety 15h ago

Question I ignored a call from an interviewer for 4 hours and i dont know what to do now

15 Upvotes

Its already past 5, he's probably gone home. I'm freaking out, i dont know if i should call back or text or do nothing? What do i do?


r/socialanxiety 8h ago

Question Are my parents in the wrong?

7 Upvotes

Hi, I am 15F. This morning I was getting ready for school. I have body dismorphia, and immediatly saw something wasnt right on my face and felt horrible about going to school. School causes a ton of anxiety for me, as I have been bullied often as a kid and pre teen, so I is a very stressful environment. My school has around 2000 people so it is extremely anxiety inducing for me. My parents know about my diagnosed high depression and social anxiety, but I feel they just don't care.

I started having a bit of a meltdown and quite a bit of panic attacks after realizing I don't look okay and I really, really don't want to go to school at this point, feeling shameful about myself. Then my dad started yelling, telling me he wished I was just normal, and my mum was telling me how silly my anxiety around people and my appearance is. I feel really terrible, because I didnt want to ruin their day (I hate dissappointing people and being the centre of attention). My dad went on a walk, my mum is not really speaking to me, and I am freaking out. Its not like I want to miss school, I just dont have any courage.

I came to reddit to ask if they are in the wrong, or just rightfully worrying about me. This was the first place I decided to come for help.


r/socialanxiety 8h ago

If you need proof it gets better, I couldn't do class presentations and this month I spoke in front of a huge crowd

3 Upvotes

I want to be careful with this because I know these posts can feel like bragging when you're in the thick of it. Not my intent at all. I'm posting because a few years ago I really needed to read something like this.

I've dealt with stage fright and anxiety about being perceived for most of my life. Racing heart, blanking out, sweating, all of it. I built a lot of my life around avoiding being looked at and I didn't even realize I was doing it.

This month I had to give a speech at an event. Few hundred people in the room plus a big livestream. I dreaded it for weeks. The day of I was a mess, out of breath, rehearsing one single sentence over and over because I was convinced I'd blank.

Here's what I want you to know. The anxiety did not go away. I did it anyway. And it went fine. Better than fine actually. Nobody saw a fool, nobody laughed, the disaster my brain had been playing on repeat for weeks just never happened.

I'm not cured. I'll be nervous the next time too. But now I have proof my anxiety is a bad predictor, and every piece of proof I collect makes its voice a little quieter.

Small steps count. Mine started years ago with just forcing myself to answer one question in class. Be kind to yourself.


r/socialanxiety 9h ago

Other I just walked to the counter at CVS and didn't even notice the self check in screen right next to me.

6 Upvotes

I stood there for a solid minute until one of the employees pointed it out to me. I'm like a boomer.

Kill me.


r/socialanxiety 13h ago

Question Seriously how do you make friends online I don’t get it

43 Upvotes

Sometimes I get people talking to me on here trying to be friends and I usually accept it but I really don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I never feel a need to talk to them unless they start it. I’m just it really sure what to say anyway. I don’t how people become friends online but I see it on discord and stuff but it doesn’t make sense to me.


r/socialanxiety 19h ago

being sleepy is a good solution for me

11 Upvotes

so somehow caffeine has an opposite effect on me. It gets me relaxed and chill and not alert at all or sometimes no effects at all. Interesting right? but that’s not what I precisely want to share here.
cause most of the time caffeine is like water for me.

However, when I am sleepy I get my confidence level literally among the stars, I wonder why my confidence level increases, I am naturally an agreeable person people pleaser and my self esteem is in the abyss. But somehow being sleepy makes me super confident and ready to confront.

Any body else can relate to that or I wonder if there is any scientific floor for what I feel.


r/socialanxiety 8h ago

TW: Suicide Mention I’d rather die than work

336 Upvotes

I feel like a pathetic failure that doesn’t want to work. There’s like no options for me, especially with how severe my social anxiety is. Even the supposed “easy” jobs for social anxiety sound too hard. I wouldn’t be able to do them. I’d rather die than be so intensely uncomfortable and anxious.

I can’t even do most basic fucking things. I don’t know how to talk to people. I freeze every time I have to talk to someone, looking like a deer in headlights, and unable to respond. My brain goes blank. I’d be too slow to understand what to do at work. And I’d be uncomfortable every fucking day. It doesn’t get easier. Telling me to “just do it while uncomfortable“ doesn‘t help.

I’ve been like this for too long and feel like I’m just fucked no matter what. I‘m too mentally ill and broken for this world. I can’t handle it. I can‘t handle being around people. I’m scared suicide will be my only option, if I’m ever able to actually do it.

I hate myself more than anything. I’m not meant for this world.


r/socialanxiety 19h ago

I couldn't help disabled and older people because of my nervousness and it made me feel bad, like im a bad person

55 Upvotes

Has anyone been through such situation


r/socialanxiety 10h ago

Practising social skills

6 Upvotes

My therapist suggested for me to make friends I should practice looking at peoples hair or around their head to make it look like I'm giving eye contact. I also need to smile more.

I want friends this year, school is starting in like a few days. Does anyone have any more advice or tips in how I can be good before school starts. I'm really scared


r/socialanxiety 13h ago

Question Does anyone else's default expression look like an 1000 yard stare / spaced out?

13 Upvotes

Does anyone else's default expression look like an 1000 yard stare / spaced out?

Its a combination of stress, exhaustion, being overworked / doing too much, and not getting too much sleep, as well as too much staring at a screen all day. It gives me an intense expression, which makes me look like I'm about to be smacked in the face with a football or spaced out / on something.

I told my friend the other day I didn't want to finish up his food, but I kept spacing out and staring at it, which made me look very intent on it, so he asked if I wanted it again.

Not the most important interaction, but you can see why this is bad if someone asks if you're okay, you say you are, but you look like you just have witnessed a car accident or something.

I feel like my expression is more natural and warm with some good sleep, eyedrops, massaging my eyes, being healthy / hydrated, and also taking some time to do breathing exercisesbefore I go somewhere, whether it be to the bathroom, on a walk, or whatever alot, do alot of side hustles

Idk I feel like us with trauma and ptsd tend to do this because its already exhausting to balance work with everything else, so the emotional regulation of facial expressions and body language is hard


r/socialanxiety 13h ago

Question how has having social anxiety affected your job?

46 Upvotes

got a job recently. i know i have social anxiety, but i can atleast pretend (or so i thought) to act as a normal person would; it’s a somewhat social job. i’m a month in and my manager pulled me aside to basically tell me that im good at the job, but im not enthusiastic enough. i smile everytime i see someone and fake laugh more times than i can count in a day and listen intently. i make eye contact constantly, and then she says i’m not doing either one of those things (despite the fact that shes not even in my general vicinity for more than a total of 5 minutes in a full day shift??) .apparently i “seem like i just dont want to be here”. it’s frustrating because i really am trying my best to be social, but its just not enough apparently. i dont need the job at all, but it just internally pisses me off knowing that i might get fired or looked down upon for something that im trying so hard on, and i’ve honestly been busting
my ass for the last 3 years to catch up socially. is it crazy if i just quit?

i just wanted to know if anyone has experience a similar thing or has any advice on what i can do?🫩🫩

+ im getting paid boarder line minimum fucking wage to do all of this by the way😭😭


r/socialanxiety 13h ago

How do I explain this?

2 Upvotes

When i was 16 years old, I had two girls who lived in an apartment next to ours. They were sisters and they were friends with my family. They used to visit our apartment all the time but I was never able to talk to this?

I was never able to have a conversation with them. They were our neighbors for two years and i don't remember talking to them at all in those two years. I found a way to reach out to them online and we used to talk online sometimes but I was never able to talk to them in person.

Not only that, i would barely speak to anyone else in their presence.


r/socialanxiety 14h ago

Other I got called for a job interview and I’m extremely anxious help

6 Upvotes

So graduated 4 years ago from my degree and the reason why I haven’t been working was because I took a break because my mental health was very bad at that time, and then I also had some health problems and couldn’t work. A couple days ago i started looking and applying for jobs, i sent my resume to a insurance company and the girl told me today the boss was going to call me and HE DID and I’m so nervous and i still haven’t answered the call. They left a message on my voicemail saying they called me for a job interview and told me to call them back if I was still interested WHAT DO I DO this is my first time applying for a job and i have no experience


r/socialanxiety 1h ago

Meeting your partners friends SOS

Upvotes

When it comes to meeting people myself I don’t get much anxiety. I’m not going to strike up a conversation with a stranger but if I’m at an event, school, or work I don’t have trouble talking to people and I don’t get super anxious. I do have ADHD and have the tendency to ramble and cut people off so I try and be very aware of that but I also can’t change who I am so usually I just try to be myself and if I get along with people great and if not that’s okay, but when I meet people as someone’s partner I don’t feel that way at all.

My partner recently made some new friends and they have been pressuring him to bring me along with him so they can meet me. I know they’re just trying to be nice and take interest in his life but I really don’t want to meet them. Since they’re my partner’s friends I get so nervous they won’t like me which will reflect poorly on him and can’t stop overthinking every aspect of my life, personality, and the way I look. I usually get so nervous meeting people in these kinds of situations I just go mute and start panicking. If they were having a party or event where it was more casual I’d be okay but they want to plan a hangout specifically to meet me so the pressure is fully on.

If anyone has any advice on how to deal with this issue it’s be much appreciated!


r/socialanxiety 23h ago

Question Do you guys just grit your teeth through obligatory social events?

12 Upvotes

I’m talking about stuff like weddings, family reunions/hangouts, etc. What do you tell yourself to get through it without panicking, or how to make it better?

I’m struggling a lot with this as I have to attend an event soon, which requires traveling for (an unknown environment flares up my anxiety even more). Every time I meet with relatives and cousins, I end up feeling very embarrassed about myself for various reasons. Sometimes I feel like they’re always judging me but keeping it inside while being friendly outwardly. I get asked a lot of personal questions and I feel uncomfortable. I just want to stay quiet and fade into the background.


r/socialanxiety 3h ago

I made a total fool of myself at urgent care today 😞

2 Upvotes

During check-in I had a cognitive shutdown & I nearly forgot how to spell my own freakin name or remember the order for writing a date & accidentally put the day first (guess I'm european now) & had to scribble it out & do it again. After getting checked in, I then proceeded to walk off in the wrong direction like an idiot lol. When I was called back, I couldn't find the nerve to ask the dr all the questions I wanted to & planned & I also couldn't manage to look him in the eye when we were talking, which made it super awkward. When that mess was over, I forgot how to get back to the lobby, even though there was a door with a big EXIT sign right in front of my dumbass & it was the same exact door I came in through, so I just embarrassed myself again haha. I'm mortified & cringing so bad. I put it off for so long & was really suffering because of it & I'm proud of myself for working up the courage to finally go & get it taken care of, but damn if it didn't go just as horrendously as I imagined. Maybe one day I'll be able to get through an appointment & not look like a complete moron or like I just landed on earth or something. Here's hoping I guess!


r/socialanxiety 4h ago

Question Is there still time to fix my social anxiety at 30?

16 Upvotes

I noticed the older i get the worst this disorder gets like holy crap i never realize how bad it's getting as noticed over the years that there was things i
wasn't anxious about now i'm getting anxious about it like i just can't keep living on this type of fear everyday i regret not taking therapy at a early age now im suffering much more than before


r/socialanxiety 6h ago

I don’t have my own personality

27 Upvotes

I am almost 30 and I don’t have my own personality. I feel like every person I meet I mimic them and eventually they get bored of me.

I’ve tried not mimicking but when I don’t I feel emptiness. Like nothing. If it was socially acceptable I’d be a mute. Like just not say anything. It actually makes me angry I have to say something.

I’ve never felt close to anyone for long. I’ve had a friend where I felt accepted but eventually I didn’t vibe with them.

I grew up isolated and in an emotionally volatile environment so at this point I think I’m so traumatized I’m not capable of forming human connections. I’m trying to do EMDR but it’s taking forever for my therapist to actually start the EMDR.

What do I do? I want friends but I feel like I’m the last person someone would want to be friends with. I’m moody, anxious, angry, quiet, and say one word phrases most of the time.

How can I make friends when everyone hates me?


r/socialanxiety 8h ago

Question Socializing at work

2 Upvotes

Hey, everyone. I just started a new job, and I’m a bit worried I won't be able to keep it because I don't talk to anyone and am extremely isolated within the team. My question is: how do you handle yourselves at work? How do you manage to socialize when you have to?
I work in the legal field and need to connect with my colleagues, but I feel terrible when I’m called out or corrected—and that happens a lot. I’ve never really fit in at any of the places I’ve worked. I’m struggling with this, and I’m afraid of losing my job—and my boyfriend, too—because who would date someone who can’t work... I’m so afraid of losing everything


r/socialanxiety 8h ago

Success there is hope for you

13 Upvotes

I just wanted to make this post to let anyone here struggling with social anxiety that it can get better. Ive struggled with it for as long as i remember, and used to have panic attacks at the idea of talking to even my immediate family, but now, even if its still a bit scary, i can talk to so many people and feel good about it. If you are trying to get better, trying to help yourself, keep trying. Put yourself out there, experience the good social situations, and the bad. It can get better.


r/socialanxiety 9h ago

It feels like so many small subtle dismissals grinds me down to what ive become

5 Upvotes

Im currently in probably the worst mental health situation ive ever been. Social interactions completely annihilate me these days.

I went to a support group thing tonight. I have been very isolated recently and finally went to this thing its on every month.

So at the start it split into groups of 4. I can just sense people talking to each other and not making an effort to speak to me the way they did for each other (well thats how it felt anyway).

Then it came back to the main group and everyone had a turn to contribute something to the conversation. I just felt so overwhelmed and probably looked anxious. I felt the facilitator looked a bit uncomfortable after I was done speaking. It just felt like everyone else seemed more relaxed and were able to speak a good while.

Then I made an effort to just be polite and speak briefly to a woman sitting beside me at the end. She quickly said it was nice to meet u and wrapped it up (not that I wanted a long conversation but just a feeling of struggling more then most and feeling such a disconnect - and a feeling of consistent dismissal and a lack of confidence has destroyed my self esteem and my self image.

Its not just big one off things , its often just a compounding of small things and even the small interactions feel more destructive these days...at least i tried and went to that things anyway.


r/socialanxiety 10h ago

Does anyone seem to have social anxiety for no reason?

7 Upvotes

I have social anxiety for plenty of reasons but the main one is probably due to my autism. But I'm curious if there are people who seem to just have it for no reason? Like no childhood trauma, no neurological conditions, you just have it.