Going to start by saying that I (42f) and my recently broken up with ex (55m) have differing opinions on the matter.

We had been dating a year and a half. I live in Vegas and he lives in PA but has a condo in Vegas. He is here very frequently. We would see each other in Vegas and then do our own thing when he was gone, but when we started dating we went exclusive. So I wasn’t seeing anyone when he was in PA.

He had season tickets to the Steelers for like 25 years and they played in Ireland last September. So, we went to the opener vs jets in nj. Had a whole trip around it where we golfed with his golf buddies and I met his mom in Allentown and we went around Philly, then went to the Steelers game at meadowlands, then I flew home to Vegas and he was in pa for a few weeks.

I knew he was going to Ireland for the game. He owned a business and usually would take clients to the regular game with his season tickets. So he said he had a solo trip planned and was going to meet at the game in Dublin with some clients. Fine have fun. He sent me pics and updates of his solo Dublin trip. I didn’t ask, he just sent them. Great hope it’s a fun trip!!

Well long story short it’s last month (July 2026 now) and I stumble on his ex’s Facebook page where the most recent photos are pics of them together in Ireland. Every place he told me he was alone, his ex was there. Walking through districts by day. Pubs by night. The pics he sent me of him at Irish pubs, she took and they were posted on her page. I. Was. LIVID.

I found the pics and was like wtf is this?? You said you were alone but you spent a whole week with your ex in another country going on romantic dinners and exploring the towns together???? Fuck you cheater and liar.

So I let it rip and broke up with him. Weeks later he says they didn’t sleep together so it wasn’t cheating. He says he never cheated.

I say, you went on a trip to another continent with your ex, and you lied about the whole thing. That’s fucking cheating you’re just mad you got caught later down the road.

Had I known, I’d have dumped him when I found out. If it was a “we are in the same circles in Pittsburgh, this was arranged before I met you, I’m going to see my ex there” I could have worked with that. But he didn’t just see her at the game, they explored Ireland together as a couple. There was nobody else in any of the other photos I found.

So I told him, if there was nothing to hide why did you hide it from me and lie to my face for months???

Anyway apparently he thinks it’s only cheating if you get your dick wet. But I said if he saw me out on a date with another man, he would have flipped his shit calling me a cheater. And he not only went to every dinner with his ex, it was a whole ass week together. I don’t care if they fucked or not that’s cheating. He didn’t tell me anything about that and didn’t even tell me she was there. Lied from the moment we met apparently, and yet accuses me of cheating when he isn’t around (projecting obviously).

Please tell me I’m right.

M20 I had my first kiss in December of last year and I've only kissed two girls. Kissing is awesome though. I love the tension leading up to a first kiss and resolving it without words. It's like a way of communicating with someone using just your body. I love little random smooches, I love a mini-makeout session when we get in my car, I love long makeout sessions where the whole world goes silent except for the two of us. I love feeling someone else's lips against mine, I love when they run their hands through my hair, I love when their whole vibe shifts and becomes more serious but also still playful.

I'm single now and still getting over the heartbreak from the first girl, but kissing is just so nice. I don't know how long I'll be single for or when my next kiss will be, but I know it'll be awesome.

So, I'm inching closer to 40, and I've really never had any success with dating. The thing is, I feel like I never find anyone interesting or appealing to me, personally, to want to pursue romantically. Honestly, I can count the number of women I've been interested in on one hand, and none of them have reciprocated that interest.

I don't feel I'm "picky", in the sense of, it's not like I'm looking for someone with supermodel good looks, wealth, and/ or anything else unreasonable. I'm generally more drawn to women I feel I'm on the same wavelength with, in terms of personality, sense of humor, etc., and for whatever reason, that seems strikingly rare.

Now, admittedly, over the last few years, I've also been struggling to find ways to meet new people, but through my 20s and early 30s, I've had abundant opportunities to meet people, and like I said, I can count on one hand the women I've been interested in romantically.

Funny enough, there's a woman I'm kinda talking to now, and I think she's really cool, but I get the impression this will be another instance of her not reciprocating my romantic interest. She's still talking to me, but her situation is kinda complicated. I wish something could blossom between me and her, but realistically, I'm guessing that probably won't end up happening, given my track record.

But, overall, I just don't really understand why it's so hard for me to develop romantic interest in people. I don't love the idea of having to just be alone in life, but I can't even imagine a partner for myself, at this point. I don't feel like I'm looking for something unrealistic, so I don't really understand what the problem is?

I’ve had a few relationships now, all failed or I wouldn’t be here. I’ve learned from every one of them and always try to do better for myself. I of course have plenty to still work on, 36f and my whole world has been shattered. The man 36m I thought was my forever person, gave up so fast. 15 years knowing each other, 4 years in a meaningful relationship and throwing it all away because he refuses to communicate. Genuine silence when I tried to talk to him about anything. He literally just said nothing and then never bring it up again. It’s jolting and weird. Admittedly I ended up blowing up because his refusal to talk about anything real. He then broke up with me by saying let’s have a conversation. I was relieved to finally talk all for him to say, I can’t do this, and leave. It wasn’t even a convo.

Fast forward, we’ve been in contact and now he’s blocked me completely. Of course with no warning or conversation, not shocking I know. It’s jarring and hurtful. I’m so angry and mostly devastatingly sad. I had to text his parents to get my stuff back. And his parents said they’ll drop my things off to me…… a grown man almost 37 can’t bring me my things? He’s now chosen to live with his parents and pretend I didn’t exist at all. I’m so confused. I’ve dabbled in dating apps just to get myself back out there now. It’s been a year since the break up, a month since being blocked. So it’s obvious I’m definitely not ready to date. But i feel so old now and what’s even the point. I don’t want to start a family into my 40s, I’m already exhausted and all the things I want has disappeared. Maybe I’m being dramatic, but this really sucks. How unlovable I must be that he could so easily block me and act as if I don’t exist. I don’t know. I’m sorry for my rant. I haven’t slept in what feels like years.

I’ve been going on dates with someone 11 years older for 1 month. We went on 6 dates and this last one I stayed in his place and we were intimate for 4
hours (grinding and kissing because I never did PIV sex). I did my best to make him cum without penetration and he even fell asleep in my arms which I thought it was a sign of emotional connection. It would be our last date until he comes back from his home country because he’s going to stay there the next 3 weeks.

When I came back home, he just texted me asking if I reached home and react with a kiss emoji to my reply. No good night message. No good morning message. No see you soon message. He just texts me the next day saying he landed because I asked him to and again, he reacts with a heart emoji. Today no messages too.

I thought it’s cold from his side to do this and I was expecting more communication after being intimate and flying to another continent, especially because he knows I’m a virgin and we aren’t even official. I feel used and ignored. I’m 26 and he’s 37. We belong to the same friend group and I feel so ashamed and embarrassed of this situation. He literally came on my ass and is acting like nothing happened. I feel like to stop seeing him. Besides of this situation, things are going so slow and he just texts me every other day and his dating history is only short-term relationships that lead nowhere because it “had no future.”

Do you guys get annoyed when it takes you 3-5 days to reply and then the person replies right away?

I like doing that sometimes just to mess with them 😂😂 but its also cuz I frankly dont care, if you text me, I literally might respond to you the very same second you send your message or it might take me a few hours. Speaking of which I have a voice message from a friend I havent responded to 🤔 so let me get back to that