Straight friend also my catalyst. Shes a newish bestie and we get along so well, emotionally connected and are close after developing this friendship for the past 12 months. Weve travelled a bit together this year and planning more trips.

I came out earlier this year, aged 46 (late bloomer, never knew I was queer and married). In the process of divorcing husband. Two children under 12.

Has anyone any success stories getting together with a 'straight 'friend? She had told me she tried it with a woman years ago, but maybe it hadnt been with the 'right' woman. She often makes comments about finding woman attractive and how I would be her ideal partner if I was a guy (this was in front of mutual friends).

She is also going to rent a spare room when I move info my new place. We enjoy each others company. She does not know I have these feelings towards her. I am good at keeping the boundaries as I value our friendship but day dream that one day things could be different. Fine if not, but curious if anyone has ever developed a WLW relationship with a 'straight' friend?

I(30) remember when I realized I was pan, it was honestly nice to have a word for how I felt! I was 15 and watching Jimmy Snow when he described his experience. The only downside is always the older parents or uneducated relatives that refuse to believe that’s a real thing 😮‍💨🤣
My poor grandma still believed me dating women is a “phase”.

Hi I am writing this because I really don’t know what love is I guess. I feel so many strong emotions every but I can rearly understand them. In one moment I feel incredibly happy and then a hour later very sad. And then often I feel this attraction towards a person mainly non sexual and urge to be with that person but I am unsure who this person is. I thought about that love for me is to think about the person but I am unsure. I am unsure if this is even the right place to ask I think I am between bi and pan sexuall.

I feel safe around her and care about her. She knows I am pansexual and she supports me. At the moment she identifies as straight. Idk what her family thinks of LGBTQ+ . They seem pretty chill. So if the family is cool with it, and if she possibly is bi or pan, I still don’t know if she likes me as more than a friend. I really don’t know what to do.😭

Hope eveyone is having/had a great summer. Its coming to a close . Bring on the jackets and leaves. Simon and I are ready for the seasonal change.

First of all, sorry if I have a trashy grammar, English is not my first language

I (20y'old) have known my whole life that I am pansexual and polyam.

Since when I was a kid I've had crushes on both boys and girls, but lately I've struggled to like cis men as much as I openly did when I was younger now that I live alone and have the chance to actually pursue romantically guys (lived with my not so LGBT+ friendly family up until 3 years ago).

I am comfortable enough to fall in love with women, trans women and trans men in the past, but when I start to feel a bit of attraction to a cis man, they tend to be total jerks and that kills all the feeling that I've grown.

And it makes me feel lost.

I know I love people because of who they are, their character, their hobbies, their style, not because of their bodies.

But why cis men are such... Unbearable?

I was even not comfortable enough to be open with my friends about my gender and my clothing style because of them laughing at me, my orientation, beliefs and ideals.

Idk what to do, does anyone feels similar? What did you do about it?

Hi everyone, I’ve identified as pansexual for a while. But lately, I’ve started questioning if I’m truly "gender-blind" when it comes to attraction. Instead of not noticing gender at all, I actually recognize the distinct traits and differences of each gender (women, men, genderqueer, etc.) quite clearly. I feel like there are specific things I like—and specific things I don't like—about each gender.

The biggest problem happens when I'm in a relationship. If I’m dating someone of a certain gender and I notice a trait I dislike (which feels tied to that gender), I catch myself thinking, "Maybe I should just date someone of a different gender instead." I even struggle with this internally with my current partner. And… Having these thoughts makes me feel incredibly guilty and terrible towards my partner.
(+ Actually, a few days ago, I ended up talking about this with my partner, but I chose my words poorly and was way too blunt. I told them something like, "I like you because you are [gender], but sometimes I dislike it because you are [gender]." They were deeply hurt by this, and I apologized profusely. After saying it out loud and putting myself in their shoes, it really hit me how incredibly hurtful and wrong it was to say.
Honestly, part of this is just my own internal struggle with my identity and gender, but I'm terrified that if I keep having these thoughts, it’s going to cause even more problems with my partner in the future.)

If my attraction is based on specific, different aspects of each gender, does that mean I'm not pansexual? (Maybe omnisexual?)
And, Am I unconsciously discriminating against or stereotyping people based on their gender?
If anyone else experienced similar feelings or overcome this kind of confusion, any advice or shared experiences would be really appreciated.

How do you guys genuinely figure out if you have a crush-crush or a friend-crush on someone? I've recently come to the realisation that I'm pan, i didn't really think much about it, in my pre teen era, and to tell the truth, as a 13 year old boy I was kinda homophobic because of my family, but then I kinda got feelings for another boy, and I just thought I was bi, because that's all i were aware of at that point in my life, and about before i turned 18 i somehow figured out that I'm pan i thought about it a lot but, I still have a lot of problems with deciding whether I like someone romantically or platonically, I've really had a lot of problems because of this, i always roll with me having romantic feelings for them, and that has ruined a lot of friendships for me (I'm 18 so only school friends and all, and I have no courage to come out to anyone except for my online friends who all know I'm pan) but how do you guys figure out this feelings thing? Any insight is helpful tbh

So I've known I was bisexual since I was 14. I'm 38 now and my AGAB is male and now identify as Transgender, specifically Transfeminine, as I have not gone into all the subtle nuances of completely adapting to identifying as a woman yet. I want to eventually, though.

That said, I've always been attracted to both fem types and masc types. Sexually/romantically. I'm also married, and me and my wife have a kind of "open dialogue" relationship. Even though I've always identified as bi, as the attraction part does play a factor for me, I've found out about myself that is not always the case. I've been talking to this guy online now for awhile, forging a friendship, and though I was not initially attracted to him physically, his gentle and sweet nature has made me totally be attracted to him now. I don't know, I feel like my feelings and all that are evolving to be more accepting and to see past physical nature in some cases.

There are names for this, right? I mean, just because someone is pansexual, doesn't necessarily mean they don't also have preferences either, right? I mean, it seems like someone who is pan can dig anyone, but still have actual attraction preferences? Or just depends? Maybe there is another word for this? Dunno.

Just curious to what you guys/gals/they/them's think!

Today's been really big for me in a lot of ways but after doing my nails and make-up I feel great and wanted to share 😊 I hope everyone is having a beautiful day today! ✨

I have gotten better at taking photos . Here are some I took this week. Remember you are loved and special xoxo ari

Decided to get a head start on getting ready for the weekend

Title

I just RANDOMLY realised that yesterday, that I don't really care about the gender of the people I love (I mean extra bonus points if they're a boy) but generally I don't really care

Like I have gotten some crushes of all genders, looking back

I might have a preference but I don't see myself as omni

If you can be bi with a preference then you can be pan with a preference, that's my logic

I M17 like this girl F16, we have been hanging out for a few months now, sometimes 1 on 1, sometimes with a friend group.

I have a hangout tomorrow planned with her, and possibly our friendgroup/her siblings.

I've been somewhat guilt tripping myself over not being able to make any moves, but after writing this post, I don't feel like I even need to, the relationship seems to advance by itself. What are your thoughts/experiences? School will also start in a few days, we're gonna be seeing each other daily.

On the last two hangouts, she was quite persistent with provocative takes on me, such as saying that she thinks I'm actually more interested in boys because I only show affection to them (maybe true idk) but to me it seems like she's baiting me to be like "No! that's not true!".

She's constantly mocking me, but only in this..., absurd/flipped manner? I'm not sure what's it called, since I'm a little older she'd make fun of me being a kid and stuff like that. I find those confusing, but nice, since out of all people in our friend group 90% of the time I'm the only subject of her people-oriented-jokes.

Sometimes when we hangout with her younger siblings, they would constantly ship us, they tend to be kinder to me, and more curious, they act very different around her other friends

Also, sometimes she seems to be making a conscious effort to not appear as liking me,

She once randomly sent me a drawing of my OC, we kinda have an inside joke that we're learning to flirt to each other the way lesbians do, it came from her, telling her younger brother that he should learn how to flirt from lesbians to get girls to date him, so I said we should practice on each other, she kinda went along.

The question is: is it even worth it making some conscious actions to try to advance it "artificially", such as telling her I like her in a low-key way, or stuff like that.

Or, is it just fine going as it is? Without any "moves", I feel like these "moves" happen naturally overtime.

I do kinda want to gradually introduce a little bit of physical touch, I think it can be fun to try it out.

Like, compared to the way we'd talk to each other a month ago is a lot more "cautious" compared to what we could do right now.

I (22F) have recently realized that im pan. I should have known years ago but here we are. Only a couple people in my life know including a couple online friends. When i was in school, id get so attached to my best friends that the way I acted was more of an intimate relationship when I wasnt like that from their perspective. It was the same crush like feelings towards them when I had a crush on a boy but I didnt realize that at the time. I thought those feeling were normal but I didnt think much on it because I "had" to be straight. I had a lot of friends who were lgbtq+ and it took me almost all of middle school to accept and understand. In high school, I didnt mind it and supported it but told myself "id never be gay." I thought about it quite often and I questioned a lot but I just thought, "oh im just curious about an alternative life." I wouldnt let myself be anything but straight because its what I was taught and my family is weird about the community. Towards the end of high school, I consistently said and thought, "id kiss a women to make conservatives mad." I thought about it often and imagined it. I still thought i was straight. Then I discovered people who were outside of the binary genders and i loved it. I thought it was so cool and also imagined what id be like to date them whatever they'd identify as which I didnt mind. But at my hard-core beliefs I once again thought I was straight. It wasnt until earlier this year, i started to actually explore those feelings and it was honestly confusing at first. It honestly felt freeing when I realised I wasnt into just men and it felt like I could breathe fresh air for the first time. Im still exploring these thoughts and feelings as I go. I wanted to share because I need to get it off my chest somewhere and I thought here were be ok. Thank you for taking the time to read this! I appreciate your time!